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Old 06-09-2009, 12:20 PM   #1
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In Honor Of "The Hangover" Movie I'm Paying $100 For The Best Hangover Story!


I watched the Hangover movie last night and was just HOWLING! So I thought I would make up a contest to see who has the best outrageous hangover story. I think I have you guys all beat on this one but we will see LOL! So let's hear about your wildest and craziest hangovers. The best one gets $100 paid via epass and pictures are also encouraged!

Now since I have your attention I thought I would mix business and pleasure and let you know about our new business


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Old 06-09-2009, 12:22 PM   #2
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Old 06-09-2009, 12:42 PM   #3
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bump for some hang-over stories. I have some but am too lazy to type em out.
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Old 06-09-2009, 01:10 PM   #4
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A few years ago I was in Bulgaria. My friend is rich by American standards(She's a trust fund kid who has grown up around europe, chicago, LA, NYC). She knew the upper echelon of society over there. One night we were drinking at this bar with some guy who owned it named "Toshko"(or similar). He was buying us drinks all night long, but I thought nothing of it since they were less than a dollar a drink aside from a passive "thanks".

That weekend we decided to head to the Black Sea in lieu of Greece to party since that guy invited us. We drove the 6 hours to the Black Sea from the capitol of Bulgaria, Sofia at around 130 mph the whole way. People were stopping us 3 hours into the drive to hug this guy. That should have sent up some flags, but I knew she knew some crazy important people there.

When we arrived, I didn't have to pay for food, drinks, hotel, drugs, nothing. That should have sent up some more warning flags.

We met with 2 guys who are friends with mystery guy who was paying for everything who had about a dozen bodyguards. They had a fleet of mercedes, 2 filled with just bodyguards and 2 passenger cars. The lead and trailing car had the bodyguards and drove in the middle of the road not letting anyone pass on either side.

We get to a club and the bodyguards form a path for us to walk through them directly into the club into a VIP area. When we got to our spot, the bodyguards formed a semi circle around us. They were pulling in hot girls for the guys and handsome men for the women.

We had huge bottles of top top shelf vodka and I was poured several very large glasses of straight vodka.

At this point one of the main guys pulled out a kilo of coke and put it right on the table in view of everyone. The best friend of the guy who was paying for everything, nicknamed "Coco" for a reason, pulled a knife with a blood groove out, cuts it open and starts bumping straight from the ki.

Up till this point I was fine with everything. More in awe than anything else. I pulled my friend aside and asked her WTF these people were. I'm cool with a lot. I was partying with mafia a few weeks before with a model friend in Budapest.

She informs me that "Toshko" was the grandson of the former dictator of Bulgaria for something like 40 years and he's one of the richest people in the country from stolen communist money. His best friend "Coco" was a hitman. The guys who had all the bodyguards were the top drug dealers in Bulgaria who got their shipments from over the Black Sea.

I asked her in a now very slurred voice whether or not she felt she should have informed me beforehand about any of this. I had been fucking with the hitman, making digs and jokes the whole time. She said she didn't think I'd mind.

Around this time things go dark after a few more large glasses of straight vodka.

I'm told I disappeared with 3 different girls over the course of the night. Was generally wild and that the drug dealers/hitman/communist monarchy grandson loved me and my "antics" (whatever they were, no one would tell me). I was told a lot of stories the next day about things that happened and I really wasn't able to seperate fact from fiction. All I know is everyone agreed the girls were hot.

I woke up miles away in my hotel room in my boxers having no clue how I got to my hotel, got in my room and got dressed. I was really that trashed.

The next day we moved to another party city on the Black Sea to hit some of the clubs Toshko owned. There were some disgustingly fat 40+ older guys with some of the hottest, least clothed women I'd ever seen.

They gave me ecstasy and kept feeding me alcohol in a similar fashion to the night before. We had our own VIP area and some kid kept coming up bothering one of the girls we were with. This was all in Bulgarian and I was trashed out of my gourd on alcohol and god knows what so it was translated later and then translated the next day as to what exactly transpired.

The girl told the kid to leave her alone. The kid left and came back several times. After the third time the hitman told him something akin to "if you bother her again you'll be sorry". The kid came back AGAIN! The hitman pulled out the same knife he was bumping coke off of straight off the kilo the night before. He stabbed the kid in the shoulder, put his knife away and sat back down. The bouncers came over, grabbed the kid and threw him on his face into the street.

The bouncers came back over, apologized and brought us a bottle of their best champagne and asked if we needed anything else and then apologized again. The rest of the night is kind of blurry. The hitman was my ride and he couldn't see straight he was so rocked. It's a miracle we got back to the hotel. I don't remember much besides a shitload of DUI crashes on the way back to the hotel.

The next morning we were watching Germany vs. Brazil in the world cup finals at some place that had the audacity to call itself a steak house. Everyone was still drunk and cracked out. The hitman and Toshko got into an argument about soccer and he pulled out the same knife again. He thrusted it towards Toshko's eyes and stopped millimeters before penetration, thrusted it a few more times and then just started laughing. I would have bet on Brazil to win, but was too afraid to win the bet at that point and I had still been ripping on the hitman even after i found out what he did for a living. I think he appreciated that.

Suffice it to say, each successive day I had the worst headache and hangover I've ever had in my life and after the entire weekend of crazy debauchery I felt like death.

There's more to the story, but I don't really feel like typing out the rest right now.
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Old 06-09-2009, 01:15 PM   #5
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i saw this movie with my gf and she said it sounds like something i would do...

My story: freshman year in college i went to a party at the rugby house after a game. it was my rookie year so they were making me drink all sorts of stuff that I didnt know about. So I'm having a good old time drinking, being stupid, blah blah blah. The last thing I remember is going into a closet which I thought was a bathroom and peeing on the floor.

next morning I wake up and my feet are dirty, really dirty. Im walking to the bathroom and wondering what the hell happened to my feet? I go back to my room and notice my shoes are clean so I figured I'm baffled.

I call a friend and head down to the cafe to get something to eat for breakfast and on the way, the girl at the front desk says "hey buddy, glad to see you made it back alive" and the other girl starts to laugh. Im thinking im must of been yelling or something, so whatever, I blow it off.

As were in the cafe, I see some other guys from my dorm and they start yelling over to me about being a pole dancer. my friend asks what they are talking about I have no clue. Then one of the guys from the rugby team comes over and sits next to me and says "damn, i cant believe you are up and moving, you were completely gone last night, we had to carry you home." Now things start to make sense, but i ask him if I took my shoes off, he said no, they were on when the put me in my room. Im still confused about my dirty feet.

Im sitting in my room watching tv and my neighbor gets back from being out with him mom. He sees me and immediately starts to bust into laughter. He tells me that after I came back into my room, I stripped down into my underwear and started knocking on the doors in the hallway then ran down the steps and went outside.

At this point im scared...

He goes on to tell me that about 15 minutes later, one of the guys at the front desk calls his room and says that I'm outside yelling at the light post and jumping in the bushes. So he goes out to get me, but i wrestle with him in the grass and he takes me inside. Then a few minutes later he says, he hears my door slam and im running down the hallway screaming.

At this point he said im on my own, hes going to bed. Well a few guys down the hall at a different party saw me swinging around on a different light post in the middle of campus, in my underwear yelling at people. the one guy said i was chased by public saftey, but when they made it back to the dorm, i was passed out in front of my door.

I thought there is no way this was true and my friend was just messing with me because he knows I couldnt remember. I talked to the one girl at the front desk and she said she saw me twice run outside in my underwear after 2am. Now im panicked because these three groups of people dont hang out, but all their stories match so there is no way all of them got together and plotted against me.

For a while I was worried that public saftey busted me or I was in trouble, but a few days later nothing even came about it and everytime I run into some of those people, they always bring it up.
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Old 06-09-2009, 01:15 PM   #6
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I went out to the club one night after drinking about a case of beer , had a couple shots of liquor .. left the club was walking home blacked out ran away from my friends they couldnt find me so they gave up and they walked all the way back home probably 2 miles or so. I woke up the next morning laying underneath a rug on a front porch , with an old lady yelling at me that shes going to call the police , the funny thing now is that i was naked couldnt find my pants , shoes, shirt or anything i ended up running out of there and hiding behind trees trying to cover myself all the way home , i had the worst hangover i couldnt find my way home i ended up running through a golf course where of course people are playing golf and are on golf carts I ran as fast as i could jumped over a couple fences.. i was pretty sure id be going to jail , but i was lucky and i made it home of course i forget my house key and the doors were locked so not only was i naked but i had to get a chair and jump threw a window. i told myself i was never drinking again but you know how long that lasts till the next weekend lol. thats my story.
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Old 06-09-2009, 01:26 PM   #7
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I had no hangover at all until I found out that the woman I woke up next to was YOUR MOM!
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Old 06-09-2009, 01:33 PM   #8
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this looks fun
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Old 06-09-2009, 01:34 PM   #9
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Lets here yours DH LOL!!
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Old 06-09-2009, 01:39 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by uno View Post
A few years ago I was in Bulgaria. My friend is rich by American standards(She's a trust fund kid who has grown up around europe, chicago, LA, NYC). She knew the upper echelon of society over there. One night we were drinking at this bar with some guy who owned it named "Toshko"(or similar). He was buying us drinks all night long, but I thought nothing of it since they were less than a dollar a drink aside from a passive "thanks".

That weekend we decided to head to the Black Sea in lieu of Greece to party since that guy invited us. We drove the 6 hours to the Black Sea from the capitol of Bulgaria, Sofia at around 130 mph the whole way. People were stopping us 3 hours into the drive to hug this guy. That should have sent up some flags, but I knew she knew some crazy important people there.

When we arrived, I didn't have to pay for food, drinks, hotel, drugs, nothing. That should have sent up some more warning flags.

We met with 2 guys who are friends with mystery guy who was paying for everything who had about a dozen bodyguards. They had a fleet of mercedes, 2 filled with just bodyguards and 2 passenger cars. The lead and trailing car had the bodyguards and drove in the middle of the road not letting anyone pass on either side.

We get to a club and the bodyguards form a path for us to walk through them directly into the club into a VIP area. When we got to our spot, the bodyguards formed a semi circle around us. They were pulling in hot girls for the guys and handsome men for the women.

We had huge bottles of top top shelf vodka and I was poured several very large glasses of straight vodka.

At this point one of the main guys pulled out a kilo of coke and put it right on the table in view of everyone. The best friend of the guy who was paying for everything, nicknamed "Coco" for a reason, pulled a knife with a blood groove out, cuts it open and starts bumping straight from the ki.

Up till this point I was fine with everything. More in awe than anything else. I pulled my friend aside and asked her WTF these people were. I'm cool with a lot. I was partying with mafia a few weeks before with a model friend in Budapest.

She informs me that "Toshko" was the grandson of the former dictator of Bulgaria for something like 40 years and he's one of the richest people in the country from stolen communist money. His best friend "Coco" was a hitman. The guys who had all the bodyguards were the top drug dealers in Bulgaria who got their shipments from over the Black Sea.

I asked her in a now very slurred voice whether or not she felt she should have informed me beforehand about any of this. I had been fucking with the hitman, making digs and jokes the whole time. She said she didn't think I'd mind.

Around this time things go dark after a few more large glasses of straight vodka.

I'm told I disappeared with 3 different girls over the course of the night. Was generally wild and that the drug dealers/hitman/communist monarchy grandson loved me and my "antics" (whatever they were, no one would tell me). I was told a lot of stories the next day about things that happened and I really wasn't able to seperate fact from fiction. All I know is everyone agreed the girls were hot.

I woke up miles away in my hotel room in my boxers having no clue how I got to my hotel, got in my room and got dressed. I was really that trashed.

The next day we moved to another party city on the Black Sea to hit some of the clubs Toshko owned. There were some disgustingly fat 40+ older guys with some of the hottest, least clothed women I'd ever seen.

They gave me ecstasy and kept feeding me alcohol in a similar fashion to the night before. We had our own VIP area and some kid kept coming up bothering one of the girls we were with. This was all in Bulgarian and I was trashed out of my gourd on alcohol and god knows what so it was translated later and then translated the next day as to what exactly transpired.

The girl told the kid to leave her alone. The kid left and came back several times. After the third time the hitman told him something akin to "if you bother her again you'll be sorry". The kid came back AGAIN! The hitman pulled out the same knife he was bumping coke off of straight off the kilo the night before. He stabbed the kid in the shoulder, put his knife away and sat back down. The bouncers came over, grabbed the kid and threw him on his face into the street.

The bouncers came back over, apologized and brought us a bottle of their best champagne and asked if we needed anything else and then apologized again. The rest of the night is kind of blurry. The hitman was my ride and he couldn't see straight he was so rocked. It's a miracle we got back to the hotel. I don't remember much besides a shitload of DUI crashes on the way back to the hotel.

The next morning we were watching Germany vs. Brazil in the world cup finals at some place that had the audacity to call itself a steak house. Everyone was still drunk and cracked out. The hitman and Toshko got into an argument about soccer and he pulled out the same knife again. He thrusted it towards Toshko's eyes and stopped millimeters before penetration, thrusted it a few more times and then just started laughing. I would have bet on Brazil to win, but was too afraid to win the bet at that point and I had still been ripping on the hitman even after i found out what he did for a living. I think he appreciated that.

Suffice it to say, each successive day I had the worst headache and hangover I've ever had in my life and after the entire weekend of crazy debauchery I felt like death.

There's more to the story, but I don't really feel like typing out the rest right now.
Holy fuck that is a good story hahahahaha!
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Old 06-09-2009, 01:40 PM   #11
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I had no hangover at all until I found out that the woman I woke up next to was YOUR MOM!
http://www.thingsididlastnight.com/
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Old 06-09-2009, 01:43 PM   #12
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Lets here yours DH LOL!!
Oh don't worry Bryan, I'll have a good tale to tell.

I just want to see what kind of competition I'm up against here LOL!
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Old 06-09-2009, 01:54 PM   #13
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Originally Posted by uno View Post
A few years ago I was in Bulgaria. My friend is rich by American standards(She's a trust fund kid who has grown up around europe, chicago, LA, NYC). She knew the upper echelon of society over there. One night we were drinking at this bar with some guy who owned it named "Toshko"(or similar). He was buying us drinks all night long, but I thought nothing of it since they were less than a dollar a drink aside from a passive "thanks".

That weekend we decided to head to the Black Sea in lieu of Greece to party since that guy invited us. We drove the 6 hours to the Black Sea from the capitol of Bulgaria, Sofia at around 130 mph the whole way. People were stopping us 3 hours into the drive to hug this guy. That should have sent up some flags, but I knew she knew some crazy important people there.

When we arrived, I didn't have to pay for food, drinks, hotel, drugs, nothing. That should have sent up some more warning flags.

We met with 2 guys who are friends with mystery guy who was paying for everything who had about a dozen bodyguards. They had a fleet of mercedes, 2 filled with just bodyguards and 2 passenger cars. The lead and trailing car had the bodyguards and drove in the middle of the road not letting anyone pass on either side.

We get to a club and the bodyguards form a path for us to walk through them directly into the club into a VIP area. When we got to our spot, the bodyguards formed a semi circle around us. They were pulling in hot girls for the guys and handsome men for the women.

We had huge bottles of top top shelf vodka and I was poured several very large glasses of straight vodka.

At this point one of the main guys pulled out a kilo of coke and put it right on the table in view of everyone. The best friend of the guy who was paying for everything, nicknamed "Coco" for a reason, pulled a knife with a blood groove out, cuts it open and starts bumping straight from the ki.

Up till this point I was fine with everything. More in awe than anything else. I pulled my friend aside and asked her WTF these people were. I'm cool with a lot. I was partying with mafia a few weeks before with a model friend in Budapest.

She informs me that "Toshko" was the grandson of the former dictator of Bulgaria for something like 40 years and he's one of the richest people in the country from stolen communist money. His best friend "Coco" was a hitman. The guys who had all the bodyguards were the top drug dealers in Bulgaria who got their shipments from over the Black Sea.

I asked her in a now very slurred voice whether or not she felt she should have informed me beforehand about any of this. I had been fucking with the hitman, making digs and jokes the whole time. She said she didn't think I'd mind.

Around this time things go dark after a few more large glasses of straight vodka.

I'm told I disappeared with 3 different girls over the course of the night. Was generally wild and that the drug dealers/hitman/communist monarchy grandson loved me and my "antics" (whatever they were, no one would tell me). I was told a lot of stories the next day about things that happened and I really wasn't able to seperate fact from fiction. All I know is everyone agreed the girls were hot.

I woke up miles away in my hotel room in my boxers having no clue how I got to my hotel, got in my room and got dressed. I was really that trashed.

The next day we moved to another party city on the Black Sea to hit some of the clubs Toshko owned. There were some disgustingly fat 40+ older guys with some of the hottest, least clothed women I'd ever seen.

They gave me ecstasy and kept feeding me alcohol in a similar fashion to the night before. We had our own VIP area and some kid kept coming up bothering one of the girls we were with. This was all in Bulgarian and I was trashed out of my gourd on alcohol and god knows what so it was translated later and then translated the next day as to what exactly transpired.

The girl told the kid to leave her alone. The kid left and came back several times. After the third time the hitman told him something akin to "if you bother her again you'll be sorry". The kid came back AGAIN! The hitman pulled out the same knife he was bumping coke off of straight off the kilo the night before. He stabbed the kid in the shoulder, put his knife away and sat back down. The bouncers came over, grabbed the kid and threw him on his face into the street.

The bouncers came back over, apologized and brought us a bottle of their best champagne and asked if we needed anything else and then apologized again. The rest of the night is kind of blurry. The hitman was my ride and he couldn't see straight he was so rocked. It's a miracle we got back to the hotel. I don't remember much besides a shitload of DUI crashes on the way back to the hotel.

The next morning we were watching Germany vs. Brazil in the world cup finals at some place that had the audacity to call itself a steak house. Everyone was still drunk and cracked out. The hitman and Toshko got into an argument about soccer and he pulled out the same knife again. He thrusted it towards Toshko's eyes and stopped millimeters before penetration, thrusted it a few more times and then just started laughing. I would have bet on Brazil to win, but was too afraid to win the bet at that point and I had still been ripping on the hitman even after i found out what he did for a living. I think he appreciated that.

Suffice it to say, each successive day I had the worst headache and hangover I've ever had in my life and after the entire weekend of crazy debauchery I felt like death.

There's more to the story, but I don't really feel like typing out the rest right now.


I don't know what to say to all that except wow!
WG
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Old 06-09-2009, 01:57 PM   #14
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Alright, here's mine... We went out for the night of my 20th birthday. My mom warned me to take it easy, as she was getting married 2 days later in Jasper, Alberta (quite a drive from Vancouver, BC), and that I had to pick up this chick who was soon to be my cousin and drive her with me. Had all sorts of great fun which is not part of the story. The story I guess really begins the first time I puked, after getting to bed...

Puked all over the bed, jumped out of bed, puked again all over my hardwood floors, start running towards the bathroom, sleep in the puke and crack my tailbone. Spend 40 minutes cleaning everything up and remaking the bed, and then go back to sleep. Wake up to my mom calling me because I slept through my alarm and I am late picking up this cousin... Jumped in the shower, realized while showering I had to puke again, and tried to lean out over the toilet from the shower to do it. Ended up slipping, and grabbed the shower curtain for support which of course brought the whole thing crashing down on me. Left all that and jumped in the car.

I was driving across Vancouver to pick this chick up, and was hit with a surprise puke... Didn't have a chance to pull over or anything and ended up blasting the windshield and dashboard while driving around 80km/hr. Luckily I always have a towel in the car so I could clean a little bit of it up. Ten minutes later while at a stoplight with a ton of people crossing the street, I opened the door and puked on the street in front of a bunch of kids and shit.

Finally got to this chicks house, she opens the door and I am like "nice to meet you can I use your bathroom?" Changed my shirt and brushed my teeth and we were on our way. I stopped at a gas station for some White Spot express, bottle of water, and tylenol, and that was the last puke of the day thankfully.

After a couple hours we were cruising up the Coquihalla highway. People from western Canada will know how steep and awful this highway is, and how hard it is on vehicles... Long story short, during the climb I overheated, one of the rad hoses cracked and showered water all over the engine, doing some sort of damage to the electrical system because I couldn't even get power to the radio. This was somewhere around Merrit, BC, and there was no cell phone reception. My travel companion said she would take a nap while I hiked out to find reception. I only had to walk 1km or so before I got 1 bar on the phone, called AAA and eventually a tow truck got out there. He took us all the way to Kamloops, where I dropped the car in a Canadian Tire parking lot. We got a cab to the Kamloops airport to get a rental car.

Turns out that my drivers license had expired the day before, on my birthday. This kind of sucked because we were just about to get the keys to a nice SUV to take us the rest of the way... Also turns out my new cousin, despite having a drivers license, did not have a credit card, and that I could not use my card to cover her. We grabbed a cab to the greyhound station, and bought two tickets to Jasper, with the next bus leaving in 4 hours. Went out and had a real dinner which was the first time I was able to relax all day. The hotel that everyone was staying at for the wedding didn't have in room phones (it was a woodland getaway spa kind of thing), so I left some messages for the family telling them to pick us up the next day at the bus station.

We took the overnight bus to Jasper, I didn't get to sit beside my cousin but instead some fat lumberjack guy, and didn't get a wink of sleep. Still got there 4 hours before I got to walk my mom down the aisle.

And that was my worst hangover day ever.
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Old 06-09-2009, 02:06 PM   #15
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more stories! this is awesome ;)
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Old 06-09-2009, 02:17 PM   #16
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Alright, here's mine... We went out for the night of my 20th birthday. My mom warned me to take it easy, as she was getting married 2 days later in Jasper, Alberta (quite a drive from Vancouver, BC), and that I had to pick up this chick who was soon to be my cousin and drive her with me. Had all sorts of great fun which is not part of the story. The story I guess really begins the first time I puked, after getting to bed...

Puked all over the bed, jumped out of bed, puked again all over my hardwood floors, start running towards the bathroom, sleep in the puke and crack my tailbone. Spend 40 minutes cleaning everything up and remaking the bed, and then go back to sleep. Wake up to my mom calling me because I slept through my alarm and I am late picking up this cousin... Jumped in the shower, realized while showering I had to puke again, and tried to lean out over the toilet from the shower to do it. Ended up slipping, and grabbed the shower curtain for support which of course brought the whole thing crashing down on me. Left all that and jumped in the car.

I was driving across Vancouver to pick this chick up, and was hit with a surprise puke... Didn't have a chance to pull over or anything and ended up blasting the windshield and dashboard while driving around 80km/hr. Luckily I always have a towel in the car so I could clean a little bit of it up. Ten minutes later while at a stoplight with a ton of people crossing the street, I opened the door and puked on the street in front of a bunch of kids and shit.

Finally got to this chicks house, she opens the door and I am like "nice to meet you can I use your bathroom?" Changed my shirt and brushed my teeth and we were on our way. I stopped at a gas station for some White Spot express, bottle of water, and tylenol, and that was the last puke of the day thankfully.

After a couple hours we were cruising up the Coquihalla highway. People from western Canada will know how steep and awful this highway is, and how hard it is on vehicles... Long story short, during the climb I overheated, one of the rad hoses cracked and showered water all over the engine, doing some sort of damage to the electrical system because I couldn't even get power to the radio. This was somewhere around Merrit, BC, and there was no cell phone reception. My travel companion said she would take a nap while I hiked out to find reception. I only had to walk 1km or so before I got 1 bar on the phone, called AAA and eventually a tow truck got out there. He took us all the way to Kamloops, where I dropped the car in a Canadian Tire parking lot. We got a cab to the Kamloops airport to get a rental car.

Turns out that my drivers license had expired the day before, on my birthday. This kind of sucked because we were just about to get the keys to a nice SUV to take us the rest of the way... Also turns out my new cousin, despite having a drivers license, did not have a credit card, and that I could not use my card to cover her. We grabbed a cab to the greyhound station, and bought two tickets to Jasper, with the next bus leaving in 4 hours. Went out and had a real dinner which was the first time I was able to relax all day. The hotel that everyone was staying at for the wedding didn't have in room phones (it was a woodland getaway spa kind of thing), so I left some messages for the family telling them to pick us up the next day at the bus station.

We took the overnight bus to Jasper, I didn't get to sit beside my cousin but instead some fat lumberjack guy, and didn't get a wink of sleep. Still got there 4 hours before I got to walk my mom down the aisle.

And that was my worst hangover day ever.
LOL! Classic!!!
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Old 06-09-2009, 02:26 PM   #17
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just very big LOL!
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Old 06-09-2009, 02:53 PM   #18
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more stories! this is awesome ;)
I agree they are fucking hillarious! LOL!
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Old 06-09-2009, 03:03 PM   #19
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I don't know what to say to all that except wow!
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I can't believe I never told you that story before on some drunken night at a show.
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Old 06-09-2009, 07:15 PM   #20
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Magnus, Rich, Devin and I are going to decide tomorrow who wins the $100

Keep getting your stories in, the ones that have been submitted so far are fucking AWESOME! LOL! Keep it up!
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Old 06-09-2009, 08:54 PM   #21
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Magnus, Rich, Devin and I are going to decide tomorrow who wins the $100

Keep getting your stories in, the ones that have been submitted so far are fucking AWESOME! LOL! Keep it up!
bump for you.
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Old 06-09-2009, 08:57 PM   #22
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does waking up sleeping in a redneck banner in a parking lot with security all around thinking there is a dead body count as an entry ?


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Old 06-10-2009, 06:17 AM   #23
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Alright today is the day, we're picking the $100 winner after lunch. Get your entries in while you still can
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Old 06-10-2009, 06:21 AM   #24
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I could easily win this but its best that I dont put my stories on here. Your team know a couple from 4 days in Vegas. Thats just 2 times man... this movie could have been writtern about me and my friends lol
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Old 06-10-2009, 06:43 AM   #25
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Old 06-10-2009, 06:55 AM   #26
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I know I'm ineligible, and I don't really have any hangover stories myself, although I was knocked out by a stripper spinning on a pole, but I wasn't drunk, and only had a concussion.. and dont really remember much of the night, but we will save that one for another time. This one is someone else's hangover as told by a sober guy.

This is a hangover story from a friend who shall remain nameless. We were in high school, I think we were 17 at the time, and it was the World Series here in Toronto, so a bunch of underage guys decided to head to a bar in the big city and celebrate. My Friend was the designated driver, so we had that covered, or so we thought.

We drove to the subway station and hopped the subway downtown, and proceeded to get our drink on. The person in question was supposed to have a drink or two and then stop, so that he could ferry our drunk asses home. Now it was about an hour and a half before we noticed that the designated driver was having a little too much fun, and had blown about 1/2 of the $120 that he had with him was gone, and he was showing many signs of intoxication. So I stopped drinking, and he proceeded to get wasted.. I think he had about 12 or so drinks (no 2 were the same) and he ended with something called "the King" which came in a giant brandy snifter and looked nasty.

At this point its about 2 am.. and we leave to walk back to the subway. But the friend cant walk. So 2 of us had to carry him.. He had to be supported as he took a leak on King St. We walk down Yonge St, to the McDonald s, thinking maybe getting some food in his stomach would help. He pukes in the alley beside the Mc Donald's, we take him in, he pukes in the bathroom, we sit him at a table while we figure out the next course of action. We look over and someone has left their tray at the table, and he is face first in someone's leftover food. So we clean him up, leave, and he pukes in the doorway of the McDonald's.

We walk down Yonge to the subway.. and while passing some cops, He pukes noodles (no idea where those came from) all over a lamp post and the cops Just laugh. We get him into the subway station, and he has trails of puke all over his Cashmere Jacket, and a guy asks if we will sell said jacket. We contemplate, but decline the offer. We get him in the subway, and he slumps on the floor and dry heaves.

When we hit the platform, we have to get him through the turnstiles, So two of us get support his arms as we walk him through , but the turnstile that we walk him through wasn't reset properly and hits him in the groin, His face contorts in a moment of sobering pain, and we drop him due to laughing.

We finally get him in the car, where he dry heaves all the way home. I get to his place, and tell him we are home and he has to get out. he mutters Fuck you, and I say .. come on .. you are covered in puke and I'm not going to carry you .. so you have to get up and walk, he tells me to fuck off again, so I tell him .. if you tell me to fuck myself again, I'm gonna leave you in the car. He Proceeds to tell me to fuck myself again, so I leave him and go in the house. His Grandmother wakes him up in the morning in the garage.

Surprisingly he made it to school the next day but I think he slumped in front of his locker for a few hours before catching a cab home.
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Old 06-10-2009, 06:56 AM   #27
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Ok one of my funnier stories is this one...

So I'm in Vegas for Internext (I think 2006 or 2007). I'm partying fucking HARD!! Ended up staying up all night playing craps with Grant from Sleazydream and Big E from Mac and Bumble.It's 6AM and Big E is raging hot on the craps and screaming like a wild banshee! HARD 8888888 MOTHERFUCKERS!!!! BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM!!! We are absolutely fucked and security is getting really tired of Big E screaming like a man possessed so they tell him repeatedly to calm down and stop swearing LOL! He goes fucking crazy on them and is about to take on the whole craps table LOL! I thought for sure this is it, Big E is going to kill someone and we're going down with him.

I end up looking at my watch and realize that holy shit I fly out at like 8:30am this morning and i totally forgot. So I say goodbye and run upstairs and start packing (while mind you still drinking like a fish!). My buddy Chris who has been sleeping all night takes a look at me and just starts laughing because i am raging drunk and still wearing my suit from the day before.

So I pack quick, forget to change clothes and off I go to the airport. On the way to the airport I am still drinking in the cab and getting beligerant. I had just won a bunch of cash on craps with Big E so I run up to first class check in and say I am not waiting in a line like cattle (and I say that loud enough to piss off a bunch of people in line LOL!) And I want an upgrade!! I think they realized I was just a mess and wanted to get rid of me so they make me pay a small fee for the upgrade for me and my buddy and send me on my way. My buddy is so embarassed he's pretending he's on the phone so he doesn't have to deal with me. LOL!

We get on to the plane and i am still loud and beligerant and already getting warnings from the flight crew LOL! We settle into our seats in first and get up to cruising altitude... Then it happens... I start detoxing HARD!! I start sweating up a storm and my buddy looks at me and says I look like a ghost! I run into the first class bathroom and put some water on my face to try and sober up. I decide to sit down on the toilet to get myself together. Well then i passed out... I was awoken 40 minutes later by a flight attendant asking me if I need medical assistance LOL! I was like "Where the fuck am I?!!!"

She says please go back to your seat... So I do and i see my buddy and the rest of first class just looking at me like i was busted trying to hijack the plane. I sit down and my friend just started shaking his head and goes back to sleep, there really was nothing to say hahahahaha!

The flight attendant comes by and checks on me and I apologize saying i had a very long night and didn't sleep. She says "don't worry this kind of shit happens all the time coming back from Vegas!"
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Old 06-10-2009, 07:01 AM   #28
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Ok this is my story
I was just come back from Israel and i decide to visit my best friend.He has one of the best homemade Macedonian drink Rakia he pull out his best Rakia and we start to drink.After we drink a lot a was so drunk that i was barely walking to my house which is like 2 km aways from his house.Next moment i was wake up with remote of his tv in my pocket
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Old 06-10-2009, 07:02 AM   #29
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Ok this is my story
I was just come back from Israel and i decide to visit my best friend.He has one of the best homemade Macedonian drink Rakia he pull out his best Rakia and we start to drink.After we drink a lot a was so drunk that i was barely walking to my house which is like 2 km aways from his house.Next moment i was wake up with remote of his tv in my pocket
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Old 06-10-2009, 07:07 AM   #30
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Ok this is my story
I was just come back from Israel and i decide to visit my best friend.He has one of the best homemade Macedonian drink Rakia he pull out his best Rakia and we start to drink.After we drink a lot a was so drunk that i was barely walking to my house which is like 2 km aways from his house.Next moment i was wake up with remote of his tv in my pocket
Nothing like waking up with weird shit in your pockets the next day. Happened many a time to me! I used to wake up after partying with college buddies and finding street signs in bed with me from the night before LOL! Seriously! 6 feet tall photo radar signs

Also nothing like waking up and finding injuries from the night before. We used to call them "UPI"s.

Unidentified Party Injurys!
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Old 06-10-2009, 07:28 AM   #31
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I woke once on the front porch of my house, keys half way in the door still holding a beer can that spilled all over the front of my pants making it look like I pissed myself.. I was that close to getting to my bed, but still couldn't make it. Man I was sick for a few days after that bender. I believe that was after the party for my 21 birthday.
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Old 06-10-2009, 09:08 AM   #32
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I woke once on the front porch of my house, keys half way in the door still holding a beer can that spilled all over the front of my pants making it look like I pissed myself.. I was that close to getting to my bed, but still couldn't make it. Man I was sick for a few days after that bender. I believe that was after the party for my 21 birthday.
Marty you have to tell the story about your brother when he stayed with us at the hotel LOL!

That one was GOLD!!!!
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Old 06-10-2009, 09:13 AM   #33
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I could easily win this but its best that I dont put my stories on here. Your team know a couple from 4 days in Vegas. Thats just 2 times man... this movie could have been writtern about me and my friends lol
Ahhhh chicken
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Old 06-10-2009, 09:15 AM   #34
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Did I tell you this one already?

Couple years ago in the summer I went for a comeback / high school reunion party around my hometown.

Somehow I was charming enough ot more presumably we both were drunk enough that I picked up a girl that I used to see at the high school and that I always found rather sexy.

Around midnight we found that we are sitting besides each other, and went a lil bit intimate. So it didn't take too long and about 5 AM the party was almost over and we had nowhere to go to finish the job, so we decided to try the luck on one of the tables.

Yet hell there was still this one stoner who had to mess around all the time, and I wasn't able nor did I want to get rid of him violently.

So there we go, "let's go to your place" I say.

We are crawling like half an hour with 4 promiles of alcohol in blood around the whole small town (or a village) lookin like Sid and Nancy, half drunk. half naked making an occassional display of drunk passion on the way to get to her house.

As we get closer she starts to get somehow nervous and tries to explain me something with her raspy voice, broken intonation and very less sense that I partly can't and partly don't want to understand.

So I don't care and tell her not to worry, I ain't no genius after an avalanche of Beer and Jäger at 6 AM but I'm damn self confident that nothing can go wrong!

And that there'll be an Adonis conquering another bedroom in a bit - I was looking forward to a romantic zombie sex.

So the morning sun (nothing is more annoying when you are a little bit too much) is shining on the two horny zombies and we come to her place, a three stock house that's a lot of space to use I think.

So she says "SHHHH" Quiet and I assure her no one gets buzzed in the house.

Not to waste time I am immediately doing a passionate undressing scene on the stairs, something between a teenager magazine and Jack Nicholson in "Postman rings twice", then we continue through the bathroom, again very passionate and wild scene then we move one stock up heading to get to her bedroom in a second - the final destination is close...

Well there is a kitchen on the way yet so I think why not to try out some "The Postman Rings Twice" again, my shirt is left on stairs and i sure have a lots of apetite for a "breakfeast" .

But then the Hollywood ended - "Jane!" A very nervous woman in early 50's turns up in the kitchen doorway with a cup of coffee. Well someone didn't tell me she recently moved back home, and I'm feeling like being 17 agan.

Anyway I was far too much drunk so I say Good Morning! and I don't care!

I am telling to myself my own logic - why should she care we can lock the door!

So I give her what I think is a smile (terrible drunken grim) and I am still dedicated to take care of her daughter and I continue to the bedroom..

The mother comes over and she ain't looking very relaxed - "Sir you have to leave this house immediately ".

Now I start to sober up, so I decide to leave not to make trouble. that's their business I only hesitate I didn't go for some wild free nature sex on the way there.

The last thing I decide is to straighten up things and explain the mother that I haven't come there only so me and her daughter could have some animal sex (which was the only reason of course, she was no stranger to one night stands either).

So I say the cliches like "We know each other for a long time" "It's not like an overnight thing" "..." crap like this and she seems to be embarrassed and almost smiling, i didn't get it, what the hell was she amused with?

So I come out of the house and once the wind starts to blow, there's this summer morning breeze and I feel what is the reason why she couldn't say a word while I was saying the whole bullshit story to her..

I had my pants unzipped and my cock was out the whole time!

Well the lesson learned - never wait or choose any destination and go for it anywhere, no matter how public place it is!
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Old 06-10-2009, 09:19 AM   #35
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did i tell you this one already?

Couple years ago in the summer i went for a comeback / high school reunion party around my hometown.

Somehow i was charming enough ot more presumably we both were drunk enough that i picked up a girl that i used to see at the high school and that i always found rather sexy.

Around midnight we found that we are sitting besides each other, and went a lil bit intimate. So it didn't take too long and about 5 am the party was almost over and we had nowhere to go to finish the job, so we decided to try the luck on one of the tables.

Yet hell there was still this one stoner who had to mess around all the time, and i wasn't able nor did i want to get rid of him violently.

So there we go, "let's go to your place" i say.

We are crawling like half an hour with 4 promiles of alcohol in blood around the whole small town (or a village) lookin like sid and nancy, half drunk. Half naked making an occassional display of drunk passion on the way to get to her house.

As we get closer she starts to get somehow nervous and tries to explain me something with her raspy voice, broken intonation and very less sense that i partly can't and partly don't want to understand.

So i don't care and tell her not to worry, i ain't no genius after an avalanche of beer and jäger at 6 am but i'm damn self confident that nothing can go wrong!

And that there'll be an adonis conquering another bedroom in a bit - i was looking forward to a romantic zombie sex.

So the morning sun (nothing is more annoying when you are a little bit too much) is shining on the two horny zombies and we come to her place, a three stock house that's a lot of space to use i think.

So she says "shhhh" quiet and i assure her no one gets buzzed in the house.

Not to waste time i am immediately doing a passionate undressing scene on the stairs, something between a teenager magazine and jack nicholson in "postman rings twice", then we continue through the bathroom, again very passionate and wild scene then we move one stock up heading to get to her bedroom in a second - the final destination is close...

Well there is a kitchen on the way yet so i think why not to try out some "the postman rings twice" again, my shirt is left on stairs and i sure have a lots of apetite for a "breakfeast" .

But then the hollywood ended - "jane!" a very nervous woman in early 50's turns up in the kitchen doorway with a cup of coffee. Well someone didn't tell me she recently moved back home, and i'm feeling like being 17 agan.

Anyway i was far too much drunk so i say good morning! And i don't care!

I am telling to myself my own logic - why should she care we can lock the door!

So i give her what i think is a smile (terrible drunken grim) and i am still dedicated to take care of her daughter and i continue to the bedroom..

The mother comes over and she ain't looking very relaxed - "sir you have to leave this house immediately ".

Now i start to sober up, so i decide to leave not to make trouble. That's their business i only hesitate i didn't go for some wild free nature sex on the way there.

The last thing i decide is to straighten up things and explain the mother that i haven't come there only so me and her daughter could have some animal sex (which was the only reason of course, she was no stranger to one night stands either).

So i say the cliches like "we know each other for a long time" "it's not like an overnight thing" "..." crap like this and she seems to be embarrassed and almost smiling, i didn't get it, what the hell was she amused with?

So i come out of the house and once the wind starts to blow, there's this summer morning breeze and i feel what is the reason why she couldn't say a word while i was saying the whole bullshit story to her..

I had my pants unzipped and my cock was out the whole time!

Well the lesson learned - never wait or choose any destination and go for it anywhere, no matter how public place it is!
lmfao!!!
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Old 06-10-2009, 09:21 AM   #36
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I woke once on the front porch of my house, keys half way in the door still holding a beer can that spilled all over the front of my pants making it look like I pissed myself.. I was that close to getting to my bed, but still couldn't make it. Man I was sick for a few days after that bender. I believe that was after the party for my 21 birthday.
LOL,

this reminds me of my buddy Paul. He once passed out in his living room after a heavy night of drinking.

I suppose before he passed out he figured he would have a little wank. So there he is watching porn and I guess he passes out with his dick in hand. His girlfriend then comes home with her girlfriends as they were at a club. They all walk in the door and Paul is passed out with the TV and porn still on, with dick in hand. OUT COLD

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Old 06-10-2009, 10:46 AM   #37
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My biz partner Al woke up at 6am in the vip room of sapphire strip joint in vegas sitting on a chair with his pants down and condom rappers in his pocket.
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Old 06-10-2009, 11:18 AM   #38
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My biz partner Al woke up at 6am in the vip room of sapphire strip joint in vegas sitting on a chair with his pants down and condom rappers in his pocket.
wasn't there a rather large bill to pay for as well?
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Old 06-10-2009, 11:26 AM   #39
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wasn't there a rather large bill to pay for as well?
Ya spent like 5k that night But hey we got a story out of it
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Old 06-10-2009, 11:27 AM   #40
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Where do I begin?
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Daddy I Get Paid To Be A Whore - Coming Soon
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Old 06-10-2009, 11:37 AM   #41
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Had a really good time reading some of the stories so congrats to the one who will win!
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Old 06-10-2009, 11:42 AM   #42
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great fucking stories

Well to tell the truth never had a hangover.

Still did some crazy shit when i was drunk.

Like this one time i was going to a party all on myself went into the club seen my buddy there with 2 girls socialized somewhat with them girls after that and some dancing went outside to smoke a joint with my buddy and those girls nuttin better to go smoke right before the cathedral than started kissing the girl in 10minutes was fingering the girl right in front of the cathedral the fucking was done in a bar was too unsafe to do that outside

This other time went to a bar on fridaynight went totally drunk and than we had nuttin better in our mind than book planetickets at 7am to poland went there partying our ass off stayed in some cheap hotel met some freaky goodlooking girls there on sunday we came back had only spend 600 ?.

Had lots of other crazy drunk times but forgot about half of them

Btw i don`t like to write very much that is why my adventures are cut as short as possible.

Keep up the crazy adventures

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Old 06-10-2009, 12:23 PM   #43
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Where do I begin?
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Old 06-10-2009, 12:47 PM   #44
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Back in like 96 or 97 I was like 21 still living in my hometown of Gilroy. Was "The Gilroy Garlic Festival" weekend and me and some of my bros decided to get 2 kegs and have a pre-party at my moms house at 8am the morning of the festival. So we're pulling in to my moms about to unload the kegs and who do we see some dude running around like a wild animal at the end of the block. Upon closer look, we realized that it was none other than Drunken Duncan, shirtless, shoeless, somewhat delirious and as it turns out... fresh out of jail (for the night). None of us had seen him in a few years because he was away at college at the time so we didn't recognize him at first. We just started saying, "holy shit, that guy's off his shit". Then one of the guys is like, "Is that Duncan? It is, it is...!" We yelled for him and he heard us and turned his head sharp and wild eyed as if offended and ready to fight or something. Then he let out into a full on sprint from all the way down the block to us. We were already laughing like crazy. He get's to us and is like, "What the fuck, pour me a beer!" So we all got started, finished the 2 kegs by like 10, made our way over to the festival and were there for about 15 minutes before Duncan got kicked out and arrested (again). The rest is basically "to be continued" every time you see him.

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Old 06-10-2009, 12:48 PM   #45
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About a year and a half ago I woke up with a really bad hangover.

So bad that I said "I'll never drink again!"







....and still haven't.
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Old 06-10-2009, 12:54 PM   #46
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Back in like 96 or 97 I was like 21 still living in my hometown of Gilroy. Was "The Gilroy Garlic Festival" weekend and me and some of my bros decided to get 2 kegs and have a pre-party at my moms house at 8am the morning of the festival. So we're pulling in to my moms about to unload the kegs and who do we see some dude running around like a wild animal at the end of the block. Upon closer look, we realized that it was none other than Drunken Duncan, shirtless, shoeless, somewhat delirious and as it turns out... fresh out of jail (for the night). None of us had seen him in a few years because he was away at college at the time so we didn't recognize him at first. We just started saying, "holy shit, that guy's off his shit". Then one of the guys is like, "Is that Duncan? It is, it is...!" We yelled for him and he heard us and turned his head sharp and wild eyed as if offended and ready to fight or something. Then he let out into a full on sprint from all the way down the block to us. We were already laughing like crazy. He get's to us and is like, "What the fuck, pour me a beer!" So we all got started, finished the 2 kegs by like 10, made our way over to the festival and were there for about 15 minutes before Duncan got kicked out and arrested (again). The rest is basically "to be continued" every time you see him.

We are crying over here right now in laughter hahahahaa!!!
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Old 06-10-2009, 12:56 PM   #47
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About a year and a half ago I woke up with a really bad hangover.

So bad that I said "I'll never drink again!"

....and still haven't.
Fucking Quitter!
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Old 06-10-2009, 12:58 PM   #48
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First of all, that movie was great. The bj pic with the old asian broad (during the credits) almost made me puke I laughed so hard.

As I told DH, and people that know me know I am strong as an ox....I can hit the gym after a night of drinking, I have Lance Armstrong constitution.

I started writing some stuff, but it is way too incriminating...not worth the $100.

What am I a clown? I am here to make you laugh?!
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Old 06-10-2009, 01:12 PM   #49
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Eating chicken wings with the IRS outta some 'chubby' dudes trunk at 4am........boooooyah
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Old 06-10-2009, 01:14 PM   #50
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First of all, that movie was great. The bj pic with the old asian broad (during the credits) almost made me puke I laughed so hard.

As I told DH, and people that know me know I am strong as an ox....I can hit the gym after a night of drinking, I have Lance Armstrong constitution.

I started writing some stuff, but it is way too incriminating...not worth the $100.

What am I a clown? I am here to make you laugh?!
Jesus..... to hear the ones I don't know.
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