The wife walked out - Page 2 - GoFuckYourself.com

WarChild · 11-03-2005, 08:27 PM

Before you use a form you found online, call the local law schools tomorrow. I think you'll be much better off.

selena · 11-03-2005, 08:28 PM

Get her to sign papers regarding custory asap.

You need to strike quickly.

I don't know about VA laws, but in Indiana, if I want to move more than 100 miles from where I lived when my divorce was final, I have to go in front of a judge to do it. He can't tell me I can't move, of course, but he can tell me that a custody change is in the child's best interest.

And I have full custody.

I know this is hard to deal with when you've got your own pain, the bewilderment of the kids and everything, but getting your shit lined out legally has got to be a priority.

You don't even want to give her the opening to throw a wrench in your plans to move.

Good luck.

RainMailer · 11-03-2005, 08:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WarChild

Before you use a form you found online, call the local law schools tomorrow. I think you'll be much better off.

Yes I definately will take your advise. I just wanted something to have incase I do not have something ready and she is ready to sign. I feel like if I do not have something then I have a chance of lossing out while the getting is good.

Th!nk · 11-03-2005, 10:11 PM

ooops! that sucks! at least you have your kids and all you have to do is to find ways how you could raise them...goodluck on that!

Wiggles · 11-03-2005, 10:24 PM

she walked out, time for the child support!

Nasty · 11-03-2005, 10:27 PM

Be glad she left the kids, do whatever you have to do to get custody asap

She will probably be back soon and tell you she wants to talk and pick up some of her things, drop the kids off at a friend or relative so they are not there at that time because she will try to take them

Mine bailed 10 years ago and left our five kids, this is the advice I was given at that time and not a day goes by that I don't thank God I followed the advice

I have full custody of my kids, it has been tough at times but I have never regretted it

Even if your not religous, I would swing by a church and ask them to council the kids, most church's have qualified counselors available and its free

pussyserver - BANNED FOR LIFE · 11-03-2005, 10:27 PM

the fuck ..suck it in she couldnt fuckin cook anyway

plus she has this anoying thing she does with her teeth

man the fuck up

RainMailer · 11-04-2005, 06:44 AM

Another day has gone by and she is not here. This is probably the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with. My feeling are shattered, my kids are hurt, and I am just lost. I have had her with me for 11 years I do not know any other way and I am here by myself to figure this out. I sent the kids to school today but I am so damn affraid to get too far away in fear that she may take them even though she says she wouldnt. I am working on the custody thing but lawyers are just so damned expensive. If you are religious please pray for my kids they need every ounce of support they can get.

sternyduke · 11-04-2005, 06:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by quiet

not in my experience.

been there too. almost 4 years and i still think about it and there have been plenty of women in between....

nothing last forever and that includes pain.

jennym · 11-04-2005, 07:10 AM

Sorry to hear of this sad situation. As a mom, all I can say is she is a worthless piece of shit, and you and your children deserve better. File papers soon, and file them as abandonement papers. Good luck to you and your kids.

RainMailer · 11-04-2005, 07:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jennym

Sorry to hear of this sad situation. As a mom, all I can say is she is a worthless piece of shit, and you and your children deserve better. File papers soon, and file them as abandonement papers. Good luck to you and your kids.

Thank you, I am just so hurt I cant get this sick feeling out of me. I am contacting local universities today to help me with the papers but so far everyone is telling me that I have to go through legal aid and I am getting the run around with them. They say I have to wait until tuesday and that it is a first come first serve basis.

Phoenix · 11-04-2005, 07:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RainMailer

Hey guys I found this online:

________________________________________ ("Custodian") shall have custody of ________________________________________ ("Child"), and control and supervision of _________ [his or her] upbringing, subject to the following:

1. ________________________________________ ("Non-Custodial Parent") shall have the right to visit the Child once each week, on either of the following days, between the following hours, respectively: (A) on ______________ [day of the week] between _________________ [starting hour] and ______________ [ending hour] or ______________ [alternate starting hour] and ______________ [alternate ending hour]; or (B) on ______________ [day of the week] between _________________ [starting hour] and ______________ [ending hour] or ______________ [alternate starting hour] and ______________ [alternate ending hour].

It is agreed that the Non-Custodial Parent will notify the Custodian on or before ___________________________ [day of the week and time of day] whether the Non-Custodial Parent intends to visit the Child and on which of the designated days and times. If the day or hour selected is inconvenient, the Custodian will notify the Non-Custodial Parent no later than ___________________________ [day of the week and time of day], and the Non-Custodial Parent shall be permitted to visit the Child the alternate day or during the alternate hours.

2. Nothing contained in this agreement shall be construed as an obligation or a duty on the part of the Non-Custodial Parent to accept custody of the Child at the time or for the periods indicated. The intention of the parties is that the Non-Custodial Parent's right of visitation shall be entirely optional to Non-Custodial Parent, and should the Non-Custodial Parent so desire, Non-Custodial Parent may waive the privilege of visitation on any occasion and for any reason, without waiving Non-Custodial Parent's right to future visits.

3. _____ Not applicable, or _____ Due to the present immaturity of the Child, the Non-Custodial Parent shall not at the present time be entitled to take the Child away from the Custodian's home for any period of time. However, if at a later date, when the Child becomes older, the Child personally expresses a wish or desire to accompany his/her Non-Custodial Parent and spend with that parent a period of time other than the periods set forth in this agreement, the Custodian will consent to such partial custody at that time and for such period.

4. The Custodian shall promptly notify the Non-Custodial Parent in the event of illness of the Child. The word "illness" shall be deemed to mean any illness, other than any illness from which the Child is now suffering, which shall confine the Child to bed for more than two days.

5. On all matters of importance relating to the Child's health and education, the Custodian shall consult and confer with the Non-Custodial Parent, with a view to adopting and following a harmonious policy.

6. Neither party shall do anything which may estrange the Child from the other.

________________________________________ Date: ______________
Signature of Non-Custodial Parent

________________________________________
Non-Custodial Parent's Printed or Typed Name

________________________________________ Date: ______________
Signature of Custodian

________________________________________
Custodian's Printed or Typed Name

have alawyer draw t his up for you..now is not the time to be taking chances and hoping things get done right....get a lawyer...write her out...im sorry to say it..but any woman that abondons her kids has some serious problems....it may not seem like it, but you and y our kids are better off without her.
best wishes to you and your kids

dylan4U · 11-04-2005, 07:23 AM

Hey I now how you feel. My wife left for another guy too, he is junkie and bum. She must be crazy

RainMailer · 11-04-2005, 07:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phoenix

have alawyer draw t his up for you..now is not the time to be taking chances and hoping things get done right....get a lawyer...write her out...im sorry to say it..but any woman that abondons her kids has some serious problems....it may not seem like it, but you and y our kids are better off without her.
best wishes to you and your kids

I have been on the phone all morning and unless you have some bucks noone seems to want to help. Legal all i get is an answering machine. She is a horrible person for this and i will never forgive her. From this day forward I will have a savings account just for any future legal issues, I never thought this would happen. What a fool I was!

RainMailer · 11-04-2005, 07:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dylan4U

Hey I now how you feel. My wife left for another guy too, he is junkie and bum. She must be crazy

My wifes excuse was is that he listened to her and she could talk to him. I told her that I would have listened to her. I was in her case alot because she just did nothing and I worked a fulltime job and I am a fulltime student. She wanted to sit around allday and do nothing and expect me to be fuckin sympathetic to her fuckin needs. What about my needs I needed finacial support and not to be judged when I needed to rest on the weekends. School and work fulltime really is hard and she just didnt understand that. FUCK HER once this pain goes away I am over her and I will give my kids the best possible chance at life that they can have. And yeah my wife left me for a man that has a criminal history including spousal abuse, this came from a magistrate judges mouth.

blazin · 11-04-2005, 07:57 AM

She'll be back for the kids as soon as she finishes fucking and her conscience nags at her

RainMailer · 11-04-2005, 08:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blazin

She'll be back for the kids as soon as she finishes fucking and her conscience nags at her

She will have to kill me first before I let her have my kids. So she better get to smooth talking her man into helping her cause it will not be a easy fight. I am not a violent person but I think I would get violent if she or him tries to take my kids.

Herb Kornfield · 11-04-2005, 08:05 AM

I have gone thru this with a child and the parent leaving....

Trust me, I thought the same thing and 4 years later she came back and the word doc we had was tossed out of court. Its not recongized as a legal and binding contract here in PA where I live.... Laws are different all over and also the judge you get and how they view the laws and the suitation.

There are a ton of armchair lawyers on here and remember that we all live in different areas with differeing laws. Get a real lawyer in your area and do it right man.

Borrow whatever it takes and get it done right otherwise you are just letting her screw you again.

1. She needs to pay support to you if she is not in custody of the kids.

2. Visitation -- Based on her leaving you high and dry?... What makes you think she'll not take your kids and vanish???

3. Regardless of she's working or not, she has to pay support since she has the "capacity" to earn whatever her past income records state. So, she's not just walking away from this fat, dumb and happy.

4. Get everything done via the legal system, its going to cost you some paper but the $2-$5k you lay out now will save you untold thousands in cash and untold arrgravation later.

Children as a responsibility that you cannot just walk away from for a new man... How long until that new man is suddendly tired of her and wants out?

He dont want a woman with kids since she dropped them on you....

That bitch would only get supervised visits with a court appointed liasion based on her actions you stated here.

Drake · 11-04-2005, 08:07 AM

You'll never fully get over it, but you will have to move on.

Quickdraw · 11-04-2005, 08:07 AM

Sounds somewhat familiar.

Might I make a few suggestions, a grain of salt might be a good side dish.

1. Make yourself more available to the kids.
You have stated that you work AND go to school full time. Right now your children need you more than ever. Cut back where you can and understand that you cannot get this time with your kids back, so don't spend it away from them when the need you most.
Whatever your reasoning for being away, right now your kids probably won't see it the same way. It will be really easy for them to feel abandoned by both parents if you do. Your kids need your strength, and a stabile environment.

2. Don't worry about dating for awhile.
Any time spent away from your children right now could be a mistake. Bringing new women in and out of their lives will confuse them(and possibly yourself) further.
You have already stated you have a full schedule, adding a new mate too soon will only distance yourself from your kids further, while taking away from their stability.
It is very important that your kids understand that THEY are YOUR priority.

Think you want sex though? Study STD/HIV on the web for awhile, your drive will go down some..

3. One day at a time.
Sure plan ahead for things that matter, but focusing on what needs to be done now might give you a little sanity. Don't let the possiblities of the future bog you down today, you have too much to do.

4. Never ever talk bad about your childrens Mother to them.
She may be the scummiest piece of shit on the planet, but you don't need to be the one to enlighten them. They will know these things in time, and possibly be able to handle it better. The kids will take your negative comments personally as she is still their Momma,to them. This could drive a wedge between you and your kids, and again, right now, your kids need you more than ever.

Anyway, these things were just at the top of my head. You probably understand alot or disagree with some. I hope a little of it is helpful.

About the divorce, do it right, especially since you plan on moving out of state soon.. too many details can go wrong if you just throw something together.

Stay strong, your work has just begun.

dirtysouth · 11-04-2005, 08:07 AM

Was there 5 years ago. Mine left me and our 2 boys for a fun filled life of Vicodin, Xanax, turning tricks in hotels rooms, methadone, section 8 housing, and other good times. Good fucking riddance I say.

Hang in there bro. It gets worse but then it get's better.

dynastoned · 11-04-2005, 08:08 AM

don't be a jackass and bring home a new girl every night of the week. you don't realize the affect it will have on your children. i know you would like to get back at your ex but don't put your children in your game they don't know any better. anyways, good luck..

tranza · 11-04-2005, 08:08 AM

oh sorry to hear that, but at least you have the kids
good luck dude

dirtysouth · 11-04-2005, 08:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Quickdraw

4. Never ever talk bad about your childrens Mother to them.
She may be the scummiest piece of shit on the planet, but you don't need to be the one to enlighten them. They will know these things in time, and possibly be able to handle it better. The kids will take your negative comments personally as she is still their Momma,to them. This could drive a wedge between you and your kids, and again, right now, your kids need you more than ever.

Incredible advice.

It cost me my last relationship but fuck a woman that doesn't understand that.

RainMailer · 11-04-2005, 08:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Quickdraw

Sounds somewhat familiar.

Might I make a few suggestions, a grain of salt might be a good side dish.

1. Make yourself more available to the kids.
You have stated that you work AND go to school full time. Right now your children need you more than ever. Cut back where you can and understand that you cannot get this time with your kids back, so don't spend it away from them when the need you most.
Whatever your reasoning for being away, right now your kids probably won't see it the same way. It will be really easy for them to feel abandoned by both parents if you do. Your kids need your strength, and a stabile environment.

2. Don't worry about dating for awhile.
Any time spent away from your children right now could be a mistake. Bringing new women in and out of their lives will confuse them(and possibly yourself) further.
You have already stated you have a full schedule, adding a new mate too soon will only distance yourself from your kids further, while taking away from their stability.
It is very important that your kids understand that THEY are YOUR priority.

Think you want sex though? Study STD/HIV on the web for awhile, your drive will go down some..

3. One day at a time.
Sure plan ahead for things that matter, but focusing on what needs to be done now might give you a little sanity. Don't let the possiblities of the future bog you down today, you have too much to do.

4. Never ever talk bad about your childrens Mother to them.
She may be the scummiest piece of shit on the planet, but you don't need to be the one to enlighten them. They will know these things in time, and possibly be able to handle it better. The kids will take your negative comments personally as she is still their Momma,to them. This could drive a wedge between you and your kids, and again, right now, your kids need you more than ever.

Anyway, these things were just at the top of my head. You probably understand alot or disagree with some. I hope a little of it is helpful.

About the divorce, do it right, especially since you plan on moving out of state soon.. too many details can go wrong if you just throw something together.

Stay strong, your work has just begun.

I really thank you for taking your time to write all of this advice. I have changed my classes to online to be with my kids more. I do not want another women in my life right now. I am sure it will be lonely for awhile but I will never devistate my children. And as you said my focus IS on my kids and what they are going through and their well being is what I am after. I have a counseling session setup for Monday to begin the healing process. I am so hurt right now and this is almost unbearable but I know I can do this with the support of people like yourself. Thanks from the bottom of my heart whats left of it.

Sosa · 11-04-2005, 08:42 AM

good luck with everything

LauraLee · 11-04-2005, 09:28 AM

RainMailer,
You sound like a very good human. The person who needs to remember this most- is you.
I (like most) have had experience in the heartbreak department, however i have never walked a mile in your shoes and have no idea what it would be like to go thru such a time with children to look out and care for as well.
When i am feeling down i find that it helps me to help others. In doing so i always manage to feel uplifted. For you this will apply to your children. Use all your positive energy to stay focused on them. As each new day passes the smiles will come more regularly and before you know it you will be hearing laughter. At this point you will realize that it has been hard, but you and your children are indeed getting thru it.

Keep your chin up and do not let the disrepectful act of your ex to allow You to fall from grace.

pussyluver · 11-04-2005, 09:37 AM

My

What you do now is of paramount importance.

I'd prolly drop the night classes for now.

Find a way to hire an attorney that will take the legal steps required and in your interest (and childrens). You need to document the abandonment of the children ASAP IMO. Ask family for money or sell something. Most attorneys will talk to ya for atleast a few minuets for free. Tell them the situation and see if a course of action doesn't fallout of a conversation. If one attorney isn't in or plain won't help, call another and another until you have something to go on. If they can't help, ask if they know a local organization that can.

Just on principle, she needs to pay child support.

Wish you the best

RainMailer · 11-04-2005, 09:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LauraLee

RainMailer,
You sound like a very good human. The person who needs to remember this most- is you.
I (like most) have had experience in the heartbreak department, however i have never walked a mile in your shoes and have no idea what it would be like to go thru such a time with children to look out and care for as well.
When i am feeling down i find that it helps me to help others. In doing so i always manage to feel uplifted. For you this will apply to your children. Use all your positive energy to stay focused on them. As each new day passes the smiles will come more regularly and before you know it you will be hearing laughter. At this point you will realize that it has been hard, but you and your children are indeed getting thru it.

Keep your chin up and do not let the disrepectful act of your ex to allow You to fall from grace.

Thanks for the kind words. I hope you never have to walk in this path is it the path to destruction. And I am heading in the other direction and show my chidren that I love them and that I will stick it out with them through thick and thin.

RainMailer · 11-04-2005, 09:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pussyluver

My

What you do now is of paramount importance.

I'd prolly drop the night classes for now.

Find a way to hire an attorney that will take the legal steps required and in your interest (and childrens). You need to document the abandonment of the children ASAP IMO. Ask family for money or sell something. Most attorneys will talk to ya for atleast a few minuets for free. Tell them the situation and see if a course of action doesn't fallout of a conversation. If one attorney isn't in or plain won't help, call another and another until you have something to go on. If they can't help, ask if they know a local organization that can.

Just on principle, she needs to pay child support.

Wish you the best

Thanks! Yes I got a notebook and started a paper trail with the local police, social services, and a magistrate court judge.

RainMailer · 11-07-2005, 10:11 AM

Hey guys I wanted to give an update. I got her ass where I want her now. My attorney says she has no grounds for custody and she has agreed to give me full custody. I had to get real dirty with her and her new man. My lawyer informed her and her man that we would sue him for Alienation of Affection and Criminal Conversation which would personally destroy him because we have the evidence for our case. Now the heat is on his ass and since then her tone has changed dramatically. I really appreciated the response from you guys and your advise has really helped me through this. Thank You GFY!

Oh yeah once I get custody I will be giving Mr. Man the option of dropping my wife in her tracks or BE SUED. But only after I get what I want.

hottoddy · 11-07-2005, 10:34 AM

If you are coming to Oregon, hit me up if you plan on consulting with a domestic relations attorney. The firm I work for has some of the top guys in the Portland Metro area.

RainMailer · 11-07-2005, 10:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hottoddy

If you are coming to Oregon, hit me up if you plan on consulting with a domestic relations attorney. The firm I work for has some of the top guys in the Portland Metro area.

Fantastic if you will email me your contact information to harbinc at cox.net

AcidMax · 11-07-2005, 10:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spunky

Hopefully it will work out in the end..it only hurts for a little while

Not with kids involved. This is for a lifetime.

Maxy · 11-07-2005, 10:59 AM

Shame for the kids. Good luck dude.

gangbangjoe · 11-07-2005, 11:00 AM

she will come back

RainMailer · 11-07-2005, 07:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gangbangjoe

she will come back

Your right I give your 3 months then I will shut her ass down. I had already started the healing process with my kids. We had our first couseling session today and I am focused on my kids, career and the future without her.

arg · 11-07-2005, 09:29 PM

RM, glad you have an attorney. I'd suggest you do anything to have a professional deal with things now...sell many possessions, dip into retirement savings, borrow from parents or whatever you have to. In a couple years, when she's making $0 and you're making $100k, it will probably occur to her that she could get custody of the kids and get $30k a year in child support. You think you're unhappy now, think about that prospect. The ensuing legal battle could cost you $50k each. Better legal preparation now will reduce her future chance of success, and hopefully reduce your future legal expenses. From what I've seen, no matter what you do, she can always come back and sue for custody later on; right now all you can do in is change the odds of her success.

As for suing the new boyfriend for alienation of affection, I hope you soon come to realize that this is pointless revenge. A natural desire at this point, but rationally, it makes no sense. It will just cost you money you don't have to spare. And you're better off with your wife with this guy, even though it hurts, because without him, she'd want alimony, or would fight harder for a larger divorce settlement, or would fight for the kids to get child support. Look at it objectively, particularly with what would help your kids the most at this point.

Eservices2k3 · 11-07-2005, 10:03 PM

Granted it will take time to realize this, but you'll eventually see that she actually did you a favor. You're better off now, and you'll be better off in the future without her.

xlogger · 11-07-2005, 10:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JuiceMonkey

what a trick
sleep with her sister/mom/dad whoever lives closer

Good idea, go to her dad house when he is sleeping, stick your penis in him and say - SURPRICE!!

Redrob · 11-07-2005, 10:11 PM

Contact an attorney, find out your rights, get the walkout documented and the paperwork started. If she walked out, count your lucky stars that she left the kids with you. At least you won't be paying child support and the money going for her new boyfriend to drink and drug on.

Again, get an attorney and do it NOW! Also, you don't have to accept any attorney that doesn't seem 100% in your corner.

Best wishes and godspeed.

graphical x · 11-07-2005, 10:16 PM

Sorry to hear about your situation. May good things come your way, RM.

Adultnet · 11-07-2005, 10:25 PM

good luck... hope things will resolve for you

lazycash · 11-07-2005, 11:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RainMailer

free live guy cam community at livecock.info

Oh yeah once I get custody I will be giving Mr. Man the option of dropping my wife in her tracks or BE SUED. But only after I get what I want.

By this comment and a few others, it appears that you'd take her back if she left him and wanted back in. If she's capable of just leaving you and the kids on a whim in the cold hearted way she did, she doesn't seem like the type of person you would want raising your children. Usually when someone leaves a long term relationship in haste they usually realize after a month or less that the grass isn't greener on the other side. So would you take her back if she wanted back in? Have you been able to figure out if she had been having an affair for a long time or was this someone she met recently?

selena · 11-08-2005, 01:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by arg

RM, glad you have an attorney. I'd suggest you do anything to have a professional deal with things now...sell many possessions, dip into retirement savings, borrow from parents or whatever you have to. In a couple years, when she's making $0 and you're making $100k, it will probably occur to her that she could get custody of the kids and get $30k a year in child support. You think you're unhappy now, think about that prospect. The ensuing legal battle could cost you $50k each. Better legal preparation now will reduce her future chance of success, and hopefully reduce your future legal expenses. From what I've seen, no matter what you do, she can always come back and sue for custody later on; right now all you can do in is change the odds of her success.

As for suing the new boyfriend for alienation of affection, I hope you soon come to realize that this is pointless revenge. A natural desire at this point, but rationally, it makes no sense. It will just cost you money you don't have to spare. And you're better off with your wife with this guy, even though it hurts, because without him, she'd want alimony, or would fight harder for a larger divorce settlement, or would fight for the kids to get child support. Look at it objectively, particularly with what would help your kids the most at this point.

Great post

Now is the time to do whatever is necessary to nail things down legally as tight as you can.

LiveDose · 11-08-2005, 01:12 AM

Damn sorry to read about all this. Keep your head up and stay strong for your kids...

Webmistres · 11-08-2005, 01:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RainMailer

I sent the kids to school today but I am so damn affraid to get too far away in fear that she may take them even though she says she wouldnt.

I'm very sorry to hear about your situation and it sounds lame to say it will get better.

From my own experience.. I talked to the schools and daycare and told them the situation and they were very helpfull. In my case my daugther was not allowed to leave school unless they knew who picked her up.

Isn't there some kind of leagal aid.. I know when I lived in the states there was a non-profil lawfirm who helped me with all my legal papers, all I had to pay for was getting the papers filed (that was work permit and stuff like that) but could be that there was something like that for someone in your situation as well *just wondering* Maybe check the web for a legal aid need you.

And as for your kids.. be strong for them.. be honest.. and most of all just love them. They need that right now!

It's okay for you to be sad, angry, hurt and all thoes feelings that we all know you are feeling right now and the best thing to do with those feelings are turn them into action. Getting your legal custody of your kids, getting control over your finances (do you guys have joined bankaccounts (?), if so... take care of that to) Cover your (_(_) as much as you can!

Webmistres · 11-08-2005, 02:04 AM

Found This maybe they can help you out

Good luck with it all...

High Quality · 11-08-2005, 02:09 AM

I bet the new guy knows how to spell and use grammar better.

BrettJ · 11-08-2005, 02:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RainMailer

Yeah I havent spit no game in 11 yrs I was a faithful husband. My game is so old its probably lame. But once a mac always a mac.

Worry more about your kids than your sex life. It may be hard to believe... but their world just got rocked even harder than yours.

11-03-2005, 08:27 PM	#51
WarChild Let slip the dogs of war. Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Bermuda Posts: 17,263	Before you use a form you found online, call the local law schools tomorrow. I think you'll be much better off. __________________ .

11-03-2005, 08:28 PM	#52
selena Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: On The Edge Posts: 7,994	Get her to sign papers regarding custory asap. You need to strike quickly. I don't know about VA laws, but in Indiana, if I want to move more than 100 miles from where I lived when my divorce was final, I have to go in front of a judge to do it. He can't tell me I can't move, of course, but he can tell me that a custody change is in the child's best interest. And I have full custody. I know this is hard to deal with when you've got your own pain, the bewilderment of the kids and everything, but getting your shit lined out legally has got to be a priority. You don't even want to give her the opening to throw a wrench in your plans to move. Good luck. __________________ ~ Doer of Things at MetArtMoney Where Flawless Beauty Meets Art ~The MetArt Network ~ selena.delgado9

11-03-2005, 10:24 PM	#55
Wiggles Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: May 2004 Posts: 14,423	she walked out, time for the child support! __________________ no sig

11-03-2005, 10:27 PM	#56
Nasty Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Sunny Fucking California Posts: 1,575	Be glad she left the kids, do whatever you have to do to get custody asap She will probably be back soon and tell you she wants to talk and pick up some of her things, drop the kids off at a friend or relative so they are not there at that time because she will try to take them Mine bailed 10 years ago and left our five kids, this is the advice I was given at that time and not a day goes by that I don't thank God I followed the advice I have full custody of my kids, it has been tough at times but I have never regretted it Even if your not religous, I would swing by a church and ask them to council the kids, most church's have qualified counselors available and its free __________________ “Ours is a world of nuclear giants and ethical infants. We know more about war than we know about peace, more about killing than we know about living. If we continue to develop our technology without wisdom or prudence, our servant may prove to be our executioner.” ― Omar Bradley (1948)

11-04-2005, 06:44 AM	#58
RainMailer Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Portland Posts: 826	Another day has gone by and she is not here. This is probably the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with. My feeling are shattered, my kids are hurt, and I am just lost. I have had her with me for 11 years I do not know any other way and I am here by myself to figure this out. I sent the kids to school today but I am so damn affraid to get too far away in fear that she may take them even though she says she wouldnt. I am working on the custody thing but lawyers are just so damned expensive. If you are religious please pray for my kids they need every ounce of support they can get. __________________ harbinc at gmail dot com

11-03-2005, 10:11 PM	#54
Th!nk Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 6,996	ooops! that sucks! at least you have your kids and all you have to do is to find ways how you could raise them...goodluck on that!

11-03-2005, 10:27 PM	#57
pussyserver - BANNED FOR LIFE So Fucking Banned Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: I convert perverts like catholic church! Posts: 5,133	the fuck ..suck it in she couldnt fuckin cook anyway plus she has this anoying thing she does with her teeth man the fuck up

11-04-2005, 07:10 AM	#60
jennym Confirmed User Join Date: May 2003 Location: the south Posts: 1,622	Sorry to hear of this sad situation. As a mom, all I can say is she is a worthless piece of shit, and you and your children deserve better. File papers soon, and file them as abandonement papers. Good luck to you and your kids.

11-04-2005, 07:23 AM	#63
dylan4U Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 521	Hey I now how you feel. My wife left for another guy too, he is junkie and bum. She must be crazy __________________

11-04-2005, 07:57 AM	#66
blazin Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2002 Posts: 2,781	She'll be back for the kids as soon as she finishes fucking and her conscience nags at her __________________ I don't endorse a god damn thing......

11-04-2005, 08:05 AM	#68
Herb Kornfield Is on the 1 Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Philly Burbs Posts: 4,996	I have gone thru this with a child and the parent leaving.... Trust me, I thought the same thing and 4 years later she came back and the word doc we had was tossed out of court. Its not recongized as a legal and binding contract here in PA where I live.... Laws are different all over and also the judge you get and how they view the laws and the suitation. There are a ton of armchair lawyers on here and remember that we all live in different areas with differeing laws. Get a real lawyer in your area and do it right man. Borrow whatever it takes and get it done right otherwise you are just letting her screw you again. 1. She needs to pay support to you if she is not in custody of the kids. 2. Visitation -- Based on her leaving you high and dry?... What makes you think she'll not take your kids and vanish??? 3. Regardless of she's working or not, she has to pay support since she has the "capacity" to earn whatever her past income records state. So, she's not just walking away from this fat, dumb and happy. 4. Get everything done via the legal system, its going to cost you some paper but the $2-$5k you lay out now will save you untold thousands in cash and untold arrgravation later. Children as a responsibility that you cannot just walk away from for a new man... How long until that new man is suddendly tired of her and wants out? He dont want a woman with kids since she dropped them on you.... That bitch would only get supervised visits with a court appointed liasion based on her actions you stated here.

11-04-2005, 08:07 AM	#69
Drake Hello world! Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 12,508	You'll never fully get over it, but you will have to move on.

11-04-2005, 08:07 AM	#70
Quickdraw Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: → → → Posts: 1,717	Sounds somewhat familiar. Might I make a few suggestions, a grain of salt might be a good side dish. 1. Make yourself more available to the kids. You have stated that you work AND go to school full time. Right now your children need you more than ever. Cut back where you can and understand that you cannot get this time with your kids back, so don't spend it away from them when the need you most. Whatever your reasoning for being away, right now your kids probably won't see it the same way. It will be really easy for them to feel abandoned by both parents if you do. Your kids need your strength, and a stabile environment. 2. Don't worry about dating for awhile. Any time spent away from your children right now could be a mistake. Bringing new women in and out of their lives will confuse them(and possibly yourself) further. You have already stated you have a full schedule, adding a new mate too soon will only distance yourself from your kids further, while taking away from their stability. It is very important that your kids understand that THEY are YOUR priority. Think you want sex though? Study STD/HIV on the web for awhile, your drive will go down some.. 3. One day at a time. Sure plan ahead for things that matter, but focusing on what needs to be done now might give you a little sanity. Don't let the possiblities of the future bog you down today, you have too much to do. 4. Never ever talk bad about your childrens Mother to them. She may be the scummiest piece of shit on the planet, but you don't need to be the one to enlighten them. They will know these things in time, and possibly be able to handle it better. The kids will take your negative comments personally as she is still their Momma,to them. This could drive a wedge between you and your kids, and again, right now, your kids need you more than ever. Anyway, these things were just at the top of my head. You probably understand alot or disagree with some. I hope a little of it is helpful. About the divorce, do it right, especially since you plan on moving out of state soon.. too many details can go wrong if you just throw something together. Stay strong, your work has just begun.

11-04-2005, 08:07 AM	#71
dirtysouth Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Mobtown Posts: 2,613	Was there 5 years ago. Mine left me and our 2 boys for a fun filled life of Vicodin, Xanax, turning tricks in hotels rooms, methadone, section 8 housing, and other good times. Good fucking riddance I say. Hang in there bro. It gets worse but then it get's better. __________________ no sig

11-04-2005, 08:08 AM	#72
dynastoned mmm yeah! Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: roseville, ca Posts: 5,061	don't be a jackass and bring home a new girl every night of the week. you don't realize the affect it will have on your children. i know you would like to get back at your ex but don't put your children in your game they don't know any better. anyways, good luck..

11-04-2005, 08:08 AM	#73
tranza ICQ: 197-556-237 Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: BRASIL !!! Posts: 57,559	oh sorry to hear that, but at least you have the kids good luck dude __________________ I'm just a newbie.

11-04-2005, 08:42 AM	#76
Sosa In Tushy Land Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Nebraska Posts: 40,149	good luck with everything

11-04-2005, 09:28 AM	#77
LauraLee Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: (Still) One Touch Cockie Posts: 3,821	RainMailer, You sound like a very good human. The person who needs to remember this most- is you. I (like most) have had experience in the heartbreak department, however i have never walked a mile in your shoes and have no idea what it would be like to go thru such a time with children to look out and care for as well. When i am feeling down i find that it helps me to help others. In doing so i always manage to feel uplifted. For you this will apply to your children. Use all your positive energy to stay focused on them. As each new day passes the smiles will come more regularly and before you know it you will be hearing laughter. At this point you will realize that it has been hard, but you and your children are indeed getting thru it. Keep your chin up and do not let the disrepectful act of your ex to allow You to fall from grace. __________________ Priority Payout skype lauralee.bunker LL's Email

11-04-2005, 09:37 AM	#78
pussyluver Clueless OleMan Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: ICQ - 169903487 Posts: 11,009	My What you do now is of paramount importance. I'd prolly drop the night classes for now. Find a way to hire an attorney that will take the legal steps required and in your interest (and childrens). You need to document the abandonment of the children ASAP IMO. Ask family for money or sell something. Most attorneys will talk to ya for atleast a few minuets for free. Tell them the situation and see if a course of action doesn't fallout of a conversation. If one attorney isn't in or plain won't help, call another and another until you have something to go on. If they can't help, ask if they know a local organization that can. Just on principle, she needs to pay child support. Wish you the best

11-07-2005, 10:11 AM	#81
RainMailer Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Portland Posts: 826	Hey guys I wanted to give an update. I got her ass where I want her now. My attorney says she has no grounds for custody and she has agreed to give me full custody. I had to get real dirty with her and her new man. My lawyer informed her and her man that we would sue him for Alienation of Affection and Criminal Conversation which would personally destroy him because we have the evidence for our case. Now the heat is on his ass and since then her tone has changed dramatically. I really appreciated the response from you guys and your advise has really helped me through this. Thank You GFY! Oh yeah once I get custody I will be giving Mr. Man the option of dropping my wife in her tracks or BE SUED. But only after I get what I want. __________________ harbinc at gmail dot com

11-07-2005, 10:34 AM	#82
hottoddy Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: PacNorWest Posts: 3,049	If you are coming to Oregon, hit me up if you plan on consulting with a domestic relations attorney. The firm I work for has some of the top guys in the Portland Metro area. __________________ - *** -

11-07-2005, 10:59 AM	#85
Maxy Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: NYC Posts: 1,858	Shame for the kids. Good luck dude. __________________ SIG TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60. Let me repeat... A 120 x 60 button and no more that 3 lines of DEFAULT SIZE AND COLOR text.

11-07-2005, 11:00 AM	#86
gangbangjoe Ronin Join Date: May 2004 Location: Live by the code Die by the code Posts: 17,693	she will come back __________________ NichePay - $30 on all trials - Killer Ratios .................................................. Female Ejaculation - Hairy - Shemale Puffy Nipples - Huge Clits - And More! ..................................................

11-07-2005, 09:29 PM	#88
arg Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2003 Posts: 1,164	RM, glad you have an attorney. I'd suggest you do anything to have a professional deal with things now...sell many possessions, dip into retirement savings, borrow from parents or whatever you have to. In a couple years, when she's making $0 and you're making $100k, it will probably occur to her that she could get custody of the kids and get $30k a year in child support. You think you're unhappy now, think about that prospect. The ensuing legal battle could cost you $50k each. Better legal preparation now will reduce her future chance of success, and hopefully reduce your future legal expenses. From what I've seen, no matter what you do, she can always come back and sue for custody later on; right now all you can do in is change the odds of her success. As for suing the new boyfriend for alienation of affection, I hope you soon come to realize that this is pointless revenge. A natural desire at this point, but rationally, it makes no sense. It will just cost you money you don't have to spare. And you're better off with your wife with this guy, even though it hurts, because without him, she'd want alimony, or would fight harder for a larger divorce settlement, or would fight for the kids to get child support. Look at it objectively, particularly with what would help your kids the most at this point.

11-07-2005, 10:03 PM	#89
Eservices2k3 Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2003 Posts: 361	Granted it will take time to realize this, but you'll eventually see that she actually did you a favor. You're better off now, and you'll be better off in the future without her. __________________ "Every man think that his burden is the heaviest" "Whosoever diggeth the pit, shall fall in it" -Bob Marley

11-07-2005, 10:11 PM	#91
Redrob Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: In a refrigerator box by the tracks. Posts: 4,791	Contact an attorney, find out your rights, get the walkout documented and the paperwork started. If she walked out, count your lucky stars that she left the kids with you. At least you won't be paying child support and the money going for her new boyfriend to drink and drug on. Again, get an attorney and do it NOW! Also, you don't have to accept any attorney that doesn't seem 100% in your corner. Best wishes and godspeed.

11-07-2005, 10:16 PM	#92
graphical x Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 316	Sorry to hear about your situation. May good things come your way, RM. __________________ No sigs needed.

11-07-2005, 10:25 PM	#93
Adultnet Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 8,713	good luck... hope things will resolve for you __________________ TrafficCashGold Paying Webmasters Since 1996! Awesome Conversions! Fast Weekly Payments! Over 125 Tours!

11-08-2005, 01:12 AM	#96
LiveDose Show Yer Tits! Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Somewhere Out there... Posts: 25,792	Damn sorry to read about all this. Keep your head up and stay strong for your kids... __________________ Scammer Alert: acer19 acer [email protected] [email protected] Money stolen using PayPal

11-08-2005, 02:04 AM	#98
Webmistres Registered User Join Date: Sep 2005 Posts: 29	Found This maybe they can help you out Good luck with it all... __________________ Arguing with people on the internet is like running the Special Olympics.. Even if you win your still a retard !

11-08-2005, 02:09 AM	#99
High Quality Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Vegas Posts: 5,741	I bet the new guy knows how to spell and use grammar better. __________________ RecurCash.com - Averaging $38/sale with 60% revshare in the first 4 months alone! Convert your TEEN traffic today @ better than 1:500 guaranteed. ICQ me: 18287590!