New Maxim just showed up, couple of jokes... - GoFuckYourself.com

Ninja Scripts · 08-23-2005, 07:16 PM

A cop parked outside a bar sees a man stumble out of the door, then trip and fall. He brushes himself off and wanders through the parking lot. Then the guy tries his key in 5 different cars before finding the right one. He slowly gets in and drives away.

The cop pulls him over immediately and makes him take a Breathalyzer test. He gets a reading of 0.0.

"This thing must be busted," says the officer.
"Nah, it's fine," the guy says. "Tonight, I'm the designated decoy."

DamageX · 08-23-2005, 07:18 PM

Old
_____

DamageX · 08-23-2005, 07:18 PM

Plus, you said "couple", you're one short.

jawanda · 08-23-2005, 07:19 PM

that's literally 5-10 years old, can't believe they printed it lol ...

-P

Doctor Dre · 08-23-2005, 07:19 PM

Very old joke ...

Ninja Scripts · 08-23-2005, 07:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DamageX

Plus, you said "couple", you're one short.

A taxi driver stops at a red light when a person suddenly jumps into the cab and tells him to go to the nearest hotel. The cabby looks in his mirror and sees a naked woman.

"What are you looking at?" she demands.

"I noticed you're completely naked," replies the cabby. "How are you going to pay?"

The woman spreads her legs and asks, "Will this cover it?"

The driver says, "Got anything smaller?"

Ninja Scripts · 08-23-2005, 07:19 PM

Fuck you all!

Doctor Dre · 08-23-2005, 07:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jawanda

that's literally 5-10 years old, can't believe they printed it lol ...

-P

A magazine editor that didn't do his job right

Doctor Dre · 08-23-2005, 07:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ninja Scripts

A taxi driver stops at a red light when a person suddenly jumps into the cab and tells him to go to the nearest hotel. The cabby looks in his mirror and sees a naked woman.

"What are you looking at?" she demands.

"I noticed you're completely naked," replies the cabby. "How are you going to pay?"

The woman spreads her legs and asks, "Will this cover it?"

The driver says, "Got anything smaller?"

Not remotely funny ;(

Ninja Scripts · 08-23-2005, 07:21 PM

Screw the jokes. See sig for a kick ass script to promote cams.com.

Lars already picked up the tab.

jawanda · 08-23-2005, 07:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ninja Scripts

Screw the jokes. See sig for a kick ass script to promote cams.com.

Lars already picked up the tab.

Lol it was a good try man, they can't all be multi-pagers

-Phil

BlueDesignStudios · 08-23-2005, 07:32 PM

old joke but still made me laugh

tony286 · 08-23-2005, 07:49 PM

thats funny never heard that one lol

PixeLs · 08-23-2005, 09:07 PM

Heard that years ago but still fresh inside. Thanks anyway.

je_rome · 08-23-2005, 11:18 PM

I have heard it gazillion times already.

TheJimmy · 08-23-2005, 11:39 PM

Fuckin rocking script, you gotta be retarded not to pick that shit up and push it...

this has been a Public Service Announcement...

Houdini · 08-24-2005, 12:05 AM

A popular Des Moines Barber shop had a new robotic barber installed.

A fellow came in for a haircut. As the robot began to cut his hair it asked him, "What's your IQ?" The man replied, "130." So the robot proceeded to make conversation about physics, astronomy, investments, insurance, and so on. The man listened intently and said, "This is really cool."

Later, another gent came in for a haircut and the robot asked him as it began the haircut, "What's your IQ?" The man responded, "100." So the robot started talking about football, baseball, and so on. The man thought to himself, "Wow, this is really cool."

Later on, a third guy came in to the barbershop. As with the others, the robot barber asked him, "What's your IQ?" The man replied, "60." The robot then said, "So, I understand you Democrats are really excited about Hillary running for president?"

PussyTeenies · 08-24-2005, 01:06 AM

old but gold

so are the other jokes

reynold · 08-24-2005, 04:06 AM

cool jokes, thanks for sharing.

08-23-2005, 07:16 PM	#1
Ninja Scripts Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Retired Posts: 1,032	New Maxim just showed up, couple of jokes... A cop parked outside a bar sees a man stumble out of the door, then trip and fall. He brushes himself off and wanders through the parking lot. Then the guy tries his key in 5 different cars before finding the right one. He slowly gets in and drives away. The cop pulls him over immediately and makes him take a Breathalyzer test. He gets a reading of 0.0. "This thing must be busted," says the officer. "Nah, it's fine," the guy says. "Tonight, I'm the designated decoy."

08-23-2005, 07:18 PM	#2
DamageX Marketing & Strategy Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Former nomad Posts: 14,293	Old _____ __________________ Whitehat is for chumps If you don't do it, somebody else will - true story!

08-23-2005, 07:18 PM	#3
DamageX Marketing & Strategy Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Former nomad Posts: 14,293	Plus, you said "couple", you're one short. __________________ Whitehat is for chumps If you don't do it, somebody else will - true story!

08-23-2005, 07:32 PM	#12
BlueDesignStudios Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Australia Posts: 9,492	old joke but still made me laugh __________________ Blue Design Studios - Adult Design Specialists! Email me for a free quote: [email protected]

08-23-2005, 09:07 PM	#14
PixeLs Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 11,922	Heard that years ago but still fresh inside. Thanks anyway. __________________ Make money on any traffic. Bi-weekly payments with no hold.

08-23-2005, 07:19 PM	#4
jawanda Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2003 Posts: 6,040	that's literally 5-10 years old, can't believe they printed it lol ... -P

08-23-2005, 07:21 PM	#10
Ninja Scripts Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Retired Posts: 1,032	Screw the jokes. See sig for a kick ass script to promote cams.com. Lars already picked up the tab.

08-23-2005, 07:49 PM	#13
tony286 lurker Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: atlanta Posts: 57,021	thats funny never heard that one lol

08-23-2005, 11:18 PM	#15
je_rome Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 6,846	I have heard it gazillion times already. __________________ Make money on any traffic. Join KlikRevenue.com Today!

08-23-2005, 11:39 PM	#16
TheJimmy ICQ- five seven 0 2 5 5 0 Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 10,747	Fuckin rocking script, you gotta be retarded not to pick that shit up and push it... this has been a Public Service Announcement... __________________ Investor with 5m - 15m USD to invest. Do you have a site or network of sites earning 50k - 200k a month income? Email your contact and preliminary data to: domain.cashventures (at) gmail.com....Please...no tire kickers...serious offers and inquiries only.

08-24-2005, 12:05 AM	#17
Houdini Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: SoCal Posts: 1,651	A popular Des Moines Barber shop had a new robotic barber installed. A fellow came in for a haircut. As the robot began to cut his hair it asked him, "What's your IQ?" The man replied, "130." So the robot proceeded to make conversation about physics, astronomy, investments, insurance, and so on. The man listened intently and said, "This is really cool." Later, another gent came in for a haircut and the robot asked him as it began the haircut, "What's your IQ?" The man responded, "100." So the robot started talking about football, baseball, and so on. The man thought to himself, "Wow, this is really cool." Later on, a third guy came in to the barbershop. As with the others, the robot barber asked him, "What's your IQ?" The man replied, "60." The robot then said, "So, I understand you Democrats are really excited about Hillary running for president?"

08-24-2005, 01:06 AM	#18
PussyTeenies Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Haarlem and Amsterdam, capital of the porn world ;-) Posts: 6,496	old but gold so are the other jokes __________________ Need adult hosting? Contact us! WARM Hosting Need an IT solution? or someone to check your site and security? Nossie - IT Professional

08-24-2005, 04:06 AM	#19
reynold Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Global Traveler Posts: 51,271	cool jokes, thanks for sharing.