The usual story when someone says sales are slow - GoFuckYourself.com

Dirty F · 12-10-2004, 06:30 AM

Affiliates agree its the worst week ever and all the sponsors pop up to claim theyre doing better than ever.

Something is wrong in this picture.

Theo · 12-10-2004, 06:33 AM

Nothing is wrong. Sponsors usually lie.

AnaNicole · 12-10-2004, 06:36 AM

Yea it's being a bad month so far but we shall turn into good!!!!

Jace · 12-10-2004, 06:37 AM

soul_rebel is right, sponsors never lie

so, it must be the affiliate that is lying

Manowar · 12-10-2004, 06:41 AM

"Today has been a record sales day!"

beemk · 12-10-2004, 06:41 AM

its not a stable industry. i just did twice as much sales yesterday as i did the day before. thats just how it works, you have good days and you have bad days.

Gunni · 12-10-2004, 06:41 AM

I'm hijacking everyones pages, all signups go to me

Jakke PNG · 12-10-2004, 06:42 AM

I don't like lying.

StuartD · 12-10-2004, 06:48 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by TeenGodFather
I don't like lying.

liar

crockett · 12-10-2004, 06:49 AM

lol how true..

I made that post for the first time ever the beginning of this week. Luckily things turned around and I'm back on schedule to having a good week and month if it holds out like this. So maybe I will top my sales again for the 7th month in a row.

mardigras · 12-10-2004, 06:49 AM

Sponsors have to pay for Christmas parties

Jakke PNG · 12-10-2004, 06:51 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by MaskedMan
liar

It's true. I sold my girlfriends car yesterday, and I couldn't lie to the buyer so we agreed to drop the price by ?150 because some small faults *I* pointed out.

Dirty F · 12-10-2004, 06:56 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by TeenGodFather
It's true. I sold my girlfriends car yesterday, and I couldn't lie to the buyer so we agreed to drop the price by ?150 because some small faults *I* pointed out.

Ahahah loser haha

I like honest people though.

StuartD · 12-10-2004, 06:58 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by TeenGodFather
It's true. I sold my girlfriends car yesterday, and I couldn't lie to the buyer so we agreed to drop the price by ?150 because some small faults *I* pointed out.

I'm the same way... I go to a store, hand the cashier a $10, get some stuff and he gives me change back that has a $10 in it... and stupid me, I'll even go back to the store to give it back if I don't notice till later.

Later on I hate myself for doing it, but I always do.

Fred Quimby · 12-10-2004, 07:00 AM

I've noticed a lot of unusuall spikes these past 2 weeks,,,some good,,,some very very bad.

Furious_Female · 12-10-2004, 07:14 AM

Affiliate: My sales are down yesterday and today, is there a problem?
Account Rep: Hmm...Let me see what's up!
Affiliate: Ok
*3 hours goes by*
Affiliate: Find out anything?
Account Rep: I'm waiting to hear from our programmers still
Affiliate: Oh ok
Account Rep: I looked at our overall sales and everything seems to be normal, if not better than usual!
Affiliate: I've never gone a day with NO sales. I don't have TGP traffic and I don't convert 0:3000
Account Rep: Yeah that is odd... let me ask <insert random person's name in the office>
Affiiate: Ok
*Day goes by*
Affiliate: Hey, did you find out anything about my sales?
Account Rep: Everything is fine our our end

<insert random other webmaster> is having record sales today!
Affiliate: I don't understand what happened to my sales in the past 48 hours... it's just weird
*Account Rep is now offline. (Invisible) of course*

crockett · 12-10-2004, 07:17 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by TeenGodFather
It's true. I sold my girlfriends car yesterday, and I couldn't lie to the buyer so we agreed to drop the price by ?150 because some small faults *I* pointed out.

that's why I never got rich with my used car business lol I had to tell them everything that was wrong with the cars.

Theo · 12-10-2004, 07:22 AM

lol lol

Dirty F · 12-10-2004, 07:24 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Furious_Female
Affiliate: My sales are down yesterday and today, is there a problem?
Account Rep: Hmm...Let me see what's up!
Affiliate: Ok
*3 hours goes by*
Affiliate: Find out anything?
Account Rep: I'm waiting to hear from our programmers still
Affiliate: Oh ok
Account Rep: I looked at our overall sales and everything seems to be normal, if not better than usual!
Affiliate: I've never gone a day with NO sales. I don't have TGP traffic and I don't convert 0:3000
Account Rep: Yeah that is odd... let me ask <insert random person's name in the office>
Affiiate: Ok
*Day goes by*
Affiliate: Hey, did you find out anything about my sales?
Account Rep: Everything is fine our our end <insert random other webmaster> is having record sales today!
Affiliate: I don't understand what happened to my sales in the past 48 hours... it's just weird
*Account Rep is now offline. (Invisible) of course*

Ahahahaha how fucking true. I have this same story like 10 times in my icq history.

Paul · 12-10-2004, 10:41 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Soul_Rebel
Nothing is wrong. Sponsors usually lie.

haha !! So true

tranza · 12-10-2004, 10:48 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Furious_Female
Affiliate: My sales are down yesterday and today, is there a problem?
Account Rep: Hmm...Let me see what's up!
Affiliate: Ok
*3 hours goes by*
Affiliate: Find out anything?
Account Rep: I'm waiting to hear from our programmers still
Affiliate: Oh ok
Account Rep: I looked at our overall sales and everything seems to be normal, if not better than usual!
Affiliate: I've never gone a day with NO sales. I don't have TGP traffic and I don't convert 0:3000
Account Rep: Yeah that is odd... let me ask <insert random person's name in the office>
Affiiate: Ok
*Day goes by*
Affiliate: Hey, did you find out anything about my sales?
Account Rep: Everything is fine our our end <insert random other webmaster> is having record sales today!
Affiliate: I don't understand what happened to my sales in the past 48 hours... it's just weird
*Account Rep is now offline. (Invisible) of course*

Lol... Right on!

seven · 12-10-2004, 12:55 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Furious_Female
Affiliate: My sales are down yesterday and today, is there a problem?
Account Rep: Hmm...Let me see what's up!
Affiliate: Ok
*3 hours goes by*
Affiliate: Find out anything?
Account Rep: I'm waiting to hear from our programmers still
Affiliate: Oh ok
Account Rep: I looked at our overall sales and everything seems to be normal, if not better than usual!
Affiliate: I've never gone a day with NO sales. I don't have TGP traffic and I don't convert 0:3000
Account Rep: Yeah that is odd... let me ask <insert random person's name in the office>
Affiiate: Ok
*Day goes by*
Affiliate: Hey, did you find out anything about my sales?
Account Rep: Everything is fine our our end <insert random other webmaster> is having record sales today!
Affiliate: I don't understand what happened to my sales in the past 48 hours... it's just weird
*Account Rep is now offline. (Invisible) of course*

Far-L · 12-10-2004, 01:48 PM

Sponsor: sales have never been better!

Translation: spin control is important since there are so many other programs out there diluting sales!

Affiliate: Ratios suck why are sales down?

Translation: If I whine loud enough in a public forum will my sponsor be more generous with the shave this month?

Now... spoken in Homegrownese....

Homegrown: Sales have never been better!

Translation: We stopped getting so many supposed credits/deductions when we took over our own marketing!

Affiliate: Ratios suck why are sales down?

Translation: Why aren't I sending my traffic to Homegrown?

SykkBoy · 12-10-2004, 02:05 PM

I get this one a few times

Affiliate: you fucking crooks! you're shaving me! I show no clicks and no sales
Me: what's your webmaster ID, I'll look at your account
(Affiliate gives the webmaster ID. I look it up)
Affiliate: I just clicked my link again and I don't see any clicks showing up.
Me: hmm, odd, I don't see any clicks either. What page are you sending from
(affiliate gives me the url)
Me: is this the only page you are sending from?
Affiliate: yes, right now
(I click the link myself and our site comes up. I wait a few minutes and check affilitae's stats and sure enough, click dones't show up)
Affiliate: You shaving fucker, I'm going to go on GFY and tell everyone you are shaving, theiving bastards. I'm going to tell the guys at NATS you're shaving so they can terminate your account with them.
(On a hunch I view the affiliate's source code and in another browser login as the affiliate and interestingly enough, he's copied his affiliate code WRONG I point out his problem)
Affiliate: Ooops, my bad.
(affiliate logs off ICQ)

Arm123 · 12-10-2004, 02:18 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Far-L
Affiliate: Ratios suck why are sales down?

Translation: If I whine loud enough in a public forum will my sponsor be more generous with the shave this month?

lol.. you are correct.

Especially for AVS programs. Shaving is just a part of the biz and you have to accept it. Which is why you dont put all your eggs into one basket.

The_Oracle_Porn · 12-10-2004, 02:20 PM

Sponsors fuck webmasters over all the time, and everyone takes it up the ass and think it's normal.

detoxed · 12-10-2004, 02:20 PM

Ummm I've never had a slow week without knowing exactly why it was slow, always on my end.

Far-L · 12-10-2004, 02:43 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by detoxed
Ummm I've never had a slow week without knowing exactly why it was slow, always on my end.

Translation: I know what I am actually doing...

Far-L · 12-10-2004, 02:46 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Arm123
lol.. you are correct.

Especially for AVS programs. Shaving is just a part of the biz and you have to accept it. Which is why you dont put all your eggs into one basket.

I don't think anyone has to accept it. We sure don't.

Far-L · 12-10-2004, 02:47 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by The_Oracle_Porn
Sponsors fuck webmasters over all the time, and everyone takes it up the ass and think it's normal.

But the same holds true vice versa... Affiliates are often out there fucking over sponsors too.

What a crazy mixed up world we live in!

Beerbar · 12-10-2004, 02:54 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Furious_Female
Affiliate: My sales are down yesterday and today, is there a problem?
Account Rep: Hmm...Let me see what's up!
Affiliate: Ok
*3 hours goes by*
Affiliate: Find out anything?
Account Rep: I'm waiting to hear from our programmers still
Affiliate: Oh ok
Account Rep: I looked at our overall sales and everything seems to be normal, if not better than usual!
Affiliate: I've never gone a day with NO sales. I don't have TGP traffic and I don't convert 0:3000
Account Rep: Yeah that is odd... let me ask <insert random person's name in the office>
Affiiate: Ok
*Day goes by*
Affiliate: Hey, did you find out anything about my sales?
Account Rep: Everything is fine our our end <insert random other webmaster> is having record sales today!
Affiliate: I don't understand what happened to my sales in the past 48 hours... it's just weird
*Account Rep is now offline. (Invisible) of course*

And here I was thinking it was just my rep

andrej_NDC · 12-10-2004, 02:59 PM

my december sales are almost the same as in november, but the traffic is up, so ratios are worse...I hope it change soon

The_Oracle_Porn · 12-10-2004, 03:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Far-L
But the same holds true vice versa... Affiliates are often out there fucking over sponsors too.

What a crazy mixed up world we live in!

Affiliates get terminated in a blink of an eye.
But who's gonna close down a program ?

Damn, someone should start to audit sponsors.

Mr Exotic · 12-10-2004, 03:28 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Furious_Female
Affiliate: My sales are down yesterday and today, is there a problem?
Account Rep: Hmm...Let me see what's up!
Affiliate: Ok
*3 hours goes by*
Affiliate: Find out anything?
Account Rep: I'm waiting to hear from our programmers still
Affiliate: Oh ok
Account Rep: I looked at our overall sales and everything seems to be normal, if not better than usual!
Affiliate: I've never gone a day with NO sales. I don't have TGP traffic and I don't convert 0:3000
Account Rep: Yeah that is odd... let me ask <insert random person's name in the office>
Affiiate: Ok
*Day goes by*
Affiliate: Hey, did you find out anything about my sales?
Account Rep: Everything is fine our our end <insert random other webmaster> is having record sales today!
Affiliate: I don't understand what happened to my sales in the past 48 hours... it's just weird
*Account Rep is now offline. (Invisible) of course*

so so so true

The Other Steve · 12-10-2004, 03:38 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by andrej_NDC
my december sales are almost the same as in november, but the traffic is up, so ratios are worse...I hope it change soon

That is the very first time since I started in 1998 that I have seen a sponsor say anything like that.

Andrej - I nearly fell off my chair.

andrej_NDC · 12-10-2004, 03:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by The Other Steve
That is the very first time since I started in 1998 that I have seen a sponsor say anything like that.

Andrej - I nearly fell off my chair.

lol, I didn't want to stress you

SinBucks · 12-10-2004, 03:46 PM

Stats have been very sporatic the last 2 weeks

Funky Bastard · 12-10-2004, 03:58 PM

Join's are what you make of them! traffic is crap like always!

Far-L · 12-10-2004, 04:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by The_Oracle_Porn
Affiliates get terminated in a blink of an eye.
But who's gonna close down a program ?

Damn, someone should start to audit sponsors.

Yep. I say the same thing.... and I am a sponsor!

DutchTeenCash · 12-10-2004, 04:49 PM

december has always been less then the months before, october was unbelievable, november cool and december is the usual month

ppl chargeback because they need cash for xmas and a lot more $6,95 3 days and but the ratio affiliate sales-normal sales is the same growing a bit which is good ...

but our nr 1 site has been redesigned and i got to see the first looks and its amazing so thatll boost sales

didnt lie btw

12-10-2004, 06:30 AM	#1
Dirty F Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2001 Posts: 59,204	The usual story when someone says sales are slow Affiliates agree its the worst week ever and all the sponsors pop up to claim theyre doing better than ever. Something is wrong in this picture.

12-10-2004, 06:36 AM	#3
AnaNicole Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: PANAMA Posts: 454	Yea it's being a bad month so far but we shall turn into good!!!! __________________ [email protected] This is as simple as it gets!!! 30+ products to promote....All webmasters accepted....All traffic accepted....Downloadable executables....and much more!!!

12-10-2004, 06:41 AM	#6
beemk CLICK HERE Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2002 Posts: 20,829	its not a stable industry. i just did twice as much sales yesterday as i did the day before. thats just how it works, you have good days and you have bad days. __________________ I host with Vacares

12-10-2004, 06:42 AM	#8
Jakke PNG ex-TeenGodFather Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Suomi Finland Perkele Posts: 20,306	I don't like lying. __________________ ..and I'm off.

12-10-2004, 06:49 AM	#10
crockett in a van by the river Industry Role: Join Date: May 2003 Posts: 76,806	lol how true.. I made that post for the first time ever the beginning of this week. Luckily things turned around and I'm back on schedule to having a good week and month if it holds out like this. So maybe I will top my sales again for the 7th month in a row. __________________ In November, you can vote for America's next president or its first dictator.

12-10-2004, 06:33 AM	#2
Theo HAL 9000 Industry Role: Join Date: May 2001 Posts: 34,515	Nothing is wrong. Sponsors usually lie.

12-10-2004, 06:37 AM	#4
Jace FBOP Class Of 2013 Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: bumfuck, ky Posts: 35,562	soul_rebel is right, sponsors never lie so, it must be the affiliate that is lying

12-10-2004, 06:41 AM	#5
Manowar jellyfish Join Date: Dec 2003 Posts: 71,528	"Today has been a record sales day!"

12-10-2004, 06:41 AM	#7
Gunni Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Barcelona Posts: 2,385	I'm hijacking everyones pages, all signups go to me

12-10-2004, 06:49 AM	#11
mardigras Bon temps! Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: down yonder Posts: 14,194	Sponsors have to pay for Christmas parties __________________ .

12-10-2004, 07:00 AM	#15
Fred Quimby Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Long Island, NY Posts: 5,430	I've noticed a lot of unusuall spikes these past 2 weeks,,,some good,,,some very very bad. __________________

12-10-2004, 07:14 AM	#16
Furious_Female Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Upstate, New York Posts: 8,187	Affiliate: My sales are down yesterday and today, is there a problem? Account Rep: Hmm...Let me see what's up! Affiliate: Ok 3 hours goes by Affiliate: Find out anything? Account Rep: I'm waiting to hear from our programmers still Affiliate: Oh ok Account Rep: I looked at our overall sales and everything seems to be normal, if not better than usual! Affiliate: I've never gone a day with NO sales. I don't have TGP traffic and I don't convert 0:3000 Account Rep: Yeah that is odd... let me ask <insert random person's name in the office> Affiiate: Ok Day goes by Affiliate: Hey, did you find out anything about my sales? Account Rep: Everything is fine our our end <insert random other webmaster> is having record sales today! Affiliate: I don't understand what happened to my sales in the past 48 hours... it's just weird Account Rep is now offline. (Invisible) of course __________________ Skype: j3nn.com ICQ 160370494 My current favorite high-converting sponsor: CrakRevenue

12-10-2004, 07:22 AM	#18
Theo HAL 9000 Industry Role: Join Date: May 2001 Posts: 34,515	lol lol

12-10-2004, 01:48 PM	#23
Far-L Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Seattle Posts: 6,065	Sponsor: sales have never been better! Translation: spin control is important since there are so many other programs out there diluting sales! Affiliate: Ratios suck why are sales down? Translation: If I whine loud enough in a public forum will my sponsor be more generous with the shave this month? Now... spoken in Homegrownese.... Homegrown: Sales have never been better! Translation: We stopped getting so many supposed credits/deductions when we took over our own marketing! Affiliate: Ratios suck why are sales down? Translation: Why aren't I sending my traffic to Homegrown? __________________ HomegrownCash.com, the affiliate program of Homegrown Video - The Largest Collection of Amateur XXX - Est. 1982. Contact - Email: farrell AT homegrownvideo D com Skype: hgfarl Newsweek Magazine - "Homegrown Video, the longest running series in the history of porn."

12-10-2004, 02:05 PM	#24
SykkBoy Jesus loves bacon Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Sin City, Motherfucker Posts: 19,969	I get this one a few times Affiliate: you fucking crooks! you're shaving me! I show no clicks and no sales Me: what's your webmaster ID, I'll look at your account (Affiliate gives the webmaster ID. I look it up) Affiliate: I just clicked my link again and I don't see any clicks showing up. Me: hmm, odd, I don't see any clicks either. What page are you sending from (affiliate gives me the url) Me: is this the only page you are sending from? Affiliate: yes, right now (I click the link myself and our site comes up. I wait a few minutes and check affilitae's stats and sure enough, click dones't show up) Affiliate: You shaving fucker, I'm going to go on GFY and tell everyone you are shaving, theiving bastards. I'm going to tell the guys at NATS you're shaving so they can terminate your account with them. (On a hunch I view the affiliate's source code and in another browser login as the affiliate and interestingly enough, he's copied his affiliate code WRONG I point out his problem) Affiliate: Ooops, my bad. (affiliate logs off ICQ) __________________ Support my new movie “The Second Coming”

12-10-2004, 02:20 PM	#26
The_Oracle_Porn So Fucking Banned Join Date: Dec 2004 Posts: 563	Sponsors fuck webmasters over all the time, and everyone takes it up the ass and think it's normal.

12-10-2004, 02:20 PM	#27
detoxed vip member Join Date: Jan 2003 Posts: 17,798	Ummm I've never had a slow week without knowing exactly why it was slow, always on my end.

12-10-2004, 02:59 PM	#32
andrej_NDC Registered User Industry Role: Join Date: May 2004 Posts: 7,760	my december sales are almost the same as in november, but the traffic is up, so ratios are worse...I hope it change soon

12-10-2004, 03:46 PM	#37
SinBucks Registered User Join Date: Oct 2004 Posts: 331	Stats have been very sporatic the last 2 weeks

12-10-2004, 03:58 PM	#38
Funky Bastard So Fucking Banned Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: San Antonio, Texas Posts: 2,544	Join's are what you make of them! traffic is crap like always!

12-10-2004, 04:49 PM	#40
DutchTeenCash I like Dutch Girls Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: dutchteencash.com Posts: 21,684	december has always been less then the months before, october was unbelievable, november cool and december is the usual month ppl chargeback because they need cash for xmas and a lot more $6,95 3 days and but the ratio affiliate sales-normal sales is the same growing a bit which is good ... but our nr 1 site has been redesigned and i got to see the first looks and its amazing so thatll boost sales didnt lie btw __________________ ICQ 16 91 547 - SKYPE dutchteencash bob AT dutchteencash DOT com ... did you see our newest Sweet Natural Girl Priscilla (18)?