Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives - GoFuckYourself.com

borked · 12-11-2008, 10:10 AM

Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives

The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you
Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name
Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor
A dog's parents never visit
Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across
You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a day
Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk
Dogs like to go hunting and fishing
A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you get another dog?"
If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away
A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert
If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting
Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck
If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff

jaYMan · 12-11-2008, 10:12 AM

I keep snakes.

*shrugs*

JFK · 12-11-2008, 10:14 AM

borked · 12-11-2008, 10:14 AM

Why some men have snakes and not wives

1. Snakes couldn't give a shit what you do nor care who you are

StuBradley · 12-11-2008, 10:15 AM

That's pretty funny.

spacedog · 12-11-2008, 10:21 AM

dogs rule

mona · 12-11-2008, 10:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by borked

Why some men have snakes and not wives

1. Snakes couldn't give a shit what you do nor care who you are

eroticsexxx · 12-11-2008, 02:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by borked

Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives

I have both.

InternetIsForPorn · 12-11-2008, 02:44 PM

I was preparing for something VERY wrong when clicking on the thread.

Turned out rather amusing

BradM · 12-11-2008, 02:55 PM

I approve of that message.

justinsain · 12-11-2008, 03:03 PM

Take a look to your left

bigmack · 12-11-2008, 03:03 PM

i like that.

u-Bob · 12-11-2008, 03:37 PM

Redmanthatcould · 12-11-2008, 03:39 PM

I enjoyed #13 the best.

Albeit, I don't own a pick up truck, but if I ever do, I'll make sure to have my lady friend, at the time, sit back there.

Dogs are such simple animals. I'd like a dog, but a good dog; not a smelly dog. Also, it would have to be the best dog in the universe, so that my manager would "look the other way" about me having a pet.

borked · 12-11-2008, 03:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by justinsain

Take a look to your left

I am going to steal your dog

I love em, but well, I have 1 wife and 0 dogs.

The balance needs to be tipped methinks.

borked · 12-11-2008, 03:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VS_Jeff

Also, it would have to be the best dog in the universe, so that my manager would "look the other way" about me having a pet.

EXACTLY

2012 · 12-11-2008, 03:44 PM

i have both.
if you have your dog long enough , you'll both start to look alike I heard ...

Sosa · 12-11-2008, 05:02 PM

haha nice list

Spunky · 12-11-2008, 06:25 PM

Har har,that was good for a chuckle

jmk · 12-11-2008, 06:27 PM

OMG hahahahah

markuskulit · 12-11-2008, 06:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by borked

If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff

GAMMA303 · 12-11-2008, 07:03 PM

Too true!

Jayvis · 12-11-2008, 07:09 PM

As I was reading this a commercial for that new movie Marley and Me came on...

andy83 · 12-12-2008, 11:20 AM

great one. i love my dog

firecracker · 12-12-2008, 11:31 AM

I have 2 Chihuahuas....

tranza · 12-12-2008, 11:36 AM

Dogs are the best friends ever and I love them!

Luscious Media · 12-12-2008, 11:40 AM

15. If you smear peanut butter on your nads a dog will lick it off...or so I hear.

adult-help · 12-12-2008, 11:48 AM

Ha-ha. Nice list, I agree with it. The most I like "A dog's parents never visit"

Vicious_B · 12-12-2008, 11:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jaYMan

I keep snakes.

*shrugs*

I have had dogs and snakes and would love to get both again!

What kind of snakes you keep? I had 2 Columbian Red Tail Boa Constrictors, one which grew to 11 feet. I would also like to get a Albino Burmese but they can be tempermental. Both boas I had were very tame and affectionate.

uvort · 12-12-2008, 12:10 PM

This thread is awesome, thanks for the laugh.

bronco67 · 12-12-2008, 01:10 PM

Top two reasons men have wives and not dogs

1. Dogs can't cook me dinner.
2. Dogs can't blow me.

Kudles · 12-12-2008, 01:24 PM

So true!!!!

uvort · 12-12-2008, 04:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bronco67

Top two reasons men have wives and not dogs

1. Dogs can't cook me dinner.
2. Dogs can't blow me.

2 vs 14... this is pretty one sided.

Angry Jew Cat - Banned for Life · 12-12-2008, 05:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bronco67

1. Dogs can't cook me dinner.

Honestly, the cooking I've seen come from ex's and other chick friends hasn't really been anything I wouldn't have done better myself. Aside from a couple exceptions, I'd rather eat what my dog drags home ffrom his adventures. Dinner is my deal, that is my shit, I will cook my food thnx. I learned a long time ago that id I wanted to eat good I'd have to do it for myself. It blows my mind to see the difficulty some people have making rice, or boiling noodles. If she can manage like, some pie perhaps. Fresh pie and cookies, and that would be the shit. Blowing would be a bonus. Like homemade breads and jellies. Jams, and pies and jellies and shit. Ya, I want a horny farm girl. Like an amish chick or a hutterite....

Supz · 12-12-2008, 05:46 PM

Why do some men have dogs as wives?

TheSenator · 12-12-2008, 05:48 PM

12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting

That is awesome...I needed a good laugh

TisMe · 12-12-2008, 07:15 PM

Very funny list!

doridori · 12-12-2008, 07:16 PM

has it occured to you 1 in every 1000 white males fantasize about sodomizing their pets ?

crockett · 12-12-2008, 10:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by uvort

2 vs 14... this is pretty one sided.

agreed.. I'd rather cook and do my own dishes than deal with a ball and chain..

12-11-2008, 10:12 AM	#2
jaYMan peace&profit, Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 4,885	I keep snakes. shrugs __________________ peace&profit, jaYMan

12-11-2008, 10:14 AM	#3
JFK FUBAR the ORIGINATOR Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: FUBARLAND Posts: 67,374	__________________ FUBAR Webmasters - The FUBAR Times - FUBAR Webmasters Mobile - FUBARTV.XXX For promo opps contact jfk at fubarwebmasters dot com

12-11-2008, 10:14 AM	#4
borked Totally Borked Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 6,284	Why some men have snakes and not wives 1. Snakes couldn't give a shit what you do nor care who you are __________________ For coding work - hit me up on andy // borkedcoder // com (consider figuring out the email as test #1) All models are wrong, but some are useful. George E.P. Box. p202

12-11-2008, 10:15 AM	#5
StuBradley Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Las Vegas Posts: 2,625	That's pretty funny. __________________ 51-566-514

12-11-2008, 03:03 PM	#12
bigmack Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 329	i like that. __________________ Party Flings Blog Smokin Hot Hunnies I host with Lessel Web Hosting TrafficHolder.com - Buy and Sell Traffic

12-11-2008, 10:10 AM	#1
borked Totally Borked Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 6,284	Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor A dog's parents never visit Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a day Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk Dogs like to go hunting and fishing A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you get another dog?" If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff __________________ For coding work - hit me up on andy // borkedcoder // com (consider figuring out the email as test #1) All models are wrong, but some are useful. George E.P. Box. p202

12-11-2008, 10:21 AM	#6
spacedog Yes that IS me. Bitch. Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2001 Posts: 14,149	dogs rule

12-11-2008, 02:44 PM	#9
InternetIsForPorn Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 848	I was preparing for something VERY wrong when clicking on the thread. Turned out rather amusing

12-11-2008, 02:55 PM	#10
BradM Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: 1123,6536,5231 Posts: 3,397	I approve of that message.

12-11-2008, 03:03 PM	#11
justinsain Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 3,374	Take a look to your left

12-11-2008, 03:37 PM	#13
u-Bob there's no $$$ in porn Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: icq: 195./568.-230 (btw: not getting offline msgs) Posts: 33,063

12-11-2008, 03:39 PM	#14
Redmanthatcould Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2006 Posts: 2,771	I enjoyed #13 the best. Albeit, I don't own a pick up truck, but if I ever do, I'll make sure to have my lady friend, at the time, sit back there. Dogs are such simple animals. I'd like a dog, but a good dog; not a smelly dog. Also, it would have to be the best dog in the universe, so that my manager would "look the other way" about me having a pet.

12-11-2008, 03:44 PM	#17
2012 So Fucking What Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 17,189	i have both. if you have your dog long enough , you'll both start to look alike I heard ... __________________ best host: Webair \| best sponsor: Kink \| best coder: 688218966 \| Go Fuck Yourself

12-11-2008, 05:02 PM	#18
Sosa In Tushy Land Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Nebraska Posts: 40,149	haha nice list

12-11-2008, 06:25 PM	#19
Spunky I need a beer Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: ♠ Toiletville ♠ Posts: 133,939	Har har,that was good for a chuckle __________________ *YOUR INFORMATION HERE*

12-11-2008, 06:27 PM	#20
jmk Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2002 Posts: 5,391	OMG hahahahah

12-11-2008, 07:03 PM	#22
GAMMA303 Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Sacramento Posts: 848	Too true! __________________ PLAYBOY WEBMASTERS 2.0 We have the HOTTEST ALL AMERICAN Babes! GAMMA303 ICS/PLAYBOY - Graphic Designer PPLESCOV(at)PLAYBOY.COM ICQ: 437-310-280 WWW.IDGAMMA.COM

12-11-2008, 07:09 PM	#23
Jayvis Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Cincinnati, Ohio Posts: 5,427	As I was reading this a commercial for that new movie Marley and Me came on...

12-12-2008, 11:20 AM	#24
andy83 Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 1,605	great one. i love my dog __________________ Available Skimmed Traffic Available Ad Spots BUY NICHE BANNER CLICKS OR IMPRESSIONS, SELL YOUR SPOTS FOR A FLAT RATE, SELL YOUR AD SPOTS WITH PROTRAFFIC.COM

12-12-2008, 11:31 AM	#25
firecracker Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Sacramento ca Posts: 653	I have 2 Chihuahuas.... __________________ When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I’ve never tried before.

12-12-2008, 11:36 AM	#26
tranza ICQ: 197-556-237 Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: BRASIL !!! Posts: 57,559	Dogs are the best friends ever and I love them! __________________ I'm just a newbie.

12-12-2008, 11:40 AM	#27
Luscious Media Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Foxwoods Posts: 785	15. If you smear peanut butter on your nads a dog will lick it off...or so I hear. __________________ Luscious Media ICQ: 293-550-859 CFNM Cash

12-12-2008, 11:48 AM	#28
adult-help Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 2,450	Ha-ha. Nice list, I agree with it. The most I like "A dog's parents never visit" __________________ Adult web templates, Adult WordPress Themes, TGP, MGP.. also Complete Wordpress PaySite Development - Adult WordPress Blog Themes - Free FHG Templates - Free PaySite Script - Adult Tutorials Directory - Adult Domain Marketplace - Adult Jobs

12-12-2008, 12:10 PM	#30
uvort Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Metalcash.com Posts: 3,580	This thread is awesome, thanks for the laugh. __________________ See Sig. 199907143

12-12-2008, 01:10 PM	#31
bronco67 Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Dec 2006 Posts: 29,032	Top two reasons men have wives and not dogs 1. Dogs can't cook me dinner. 2. Dogs can't blow me. __________________

12-12-2008, 01:24 PM	#32
Kudles Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Here There and Everywhere Posts: 5,477	So true!!!! __________________ Free to Play MMOs and MMORPGs

12-12-2008, 05:46 PM	#35
Supz Arthur Flegenheimer Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: New York City Posts: 11,056	Why do some men have dogs as wives?

12-12-2008, 05:48 PM	#36
TheSenator Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: NJ Posts: 13,334	12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting That is awesome...I needed a good laugh __________________ ISeekGirls.com since 2005

12-12-2008, 07:15 PM	#37
TisMe Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 1,719	Very funny list!

12-12-2008, 07:16 PM	#38
doridori So Fucking Banned Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Canadia Posts: 2,222	has it occured to you 1 in every 1000 white males fantasize about sodomizing their pets ?