Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives
 

Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives

1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you
2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name
3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor
4. A dog's parents never visit
5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across
6. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a day
7. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk
8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing
9. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you get another dog?"
10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away
11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert
12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting
13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck
14. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff

I keep snakes.

*shrugs*

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:thumbsup

Why some men have snakes and not wives

1. Snakes couldn't give a shit what you do nor care who you are

That's pretty funny. :1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

dogs rule

:1orglaugh

I have both.

I was preparing for something VERY wrong when clicking on the thread.

Turned out rather amusing :)

I approve of that message.

Take a look to your left :winkwink:

i like that.

:) :)

I enjoyed #13 the best.

Albeit, I don't own a pick up truck, but if I ever do, I'll make sure to have my lady friend, at the time, sit back there.

Dogs are such simple animals. I'd like a dog, but a good dog; not a smelly dog. Also, it would have to be the best dog in the universe, so that my manager would "look the other way" about me having a pet.

I am going to steal your dog :2 cents:

I love em, but well, I have 1 wife and 0 dogs.

The balance needs to be tipped methinks.

EXACTLY :thumbsup

:1orglaugh i have both.
if you have your dog long enough , you'll both start to look alike I heard ...

haha nice list

Har har,that was good for a chuckle

OMG hahahahah

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

Too true!

As I was reading this a commercial for that new movie Marley and Me came on... :helpme :helpme

:thumbsup :thumbsup
great one. i love my dog :)

I have 2 Chihuahuas....http://a129.ac-images.myspacecdn.com...c46d5558e8.jpg

Dogs are the best friends ever and I love them!

15. If you smear peanut butter on your nads a dog will lick it off...or so I hear. :xomunch

Ha-ha. Nice list, I agree with it. The most I like "A dog's parents never visit"

I have had dogs and snakes and would love to get both again!

What kind of snakes you keep? I had 2 Columbian Red Tail Boa Constrictors, one which grew to 11 feet. I would also like to get a Albino Burmese but they can be tempermental. Both boas I had were very tame and affectionate.

http://www.thenatureofthings.com/images/Image122.gif

http://www.constrictors.com/images/B...seDSC_0208.jpg

This thread is awesome, thanks for the laugh.

Top two reasons men have wives and not dogs

1. Dogs can't cook me dinner.
2. Dogs can't blow me.

So true!!!!

2 vs 14... this is pretty one sided. :1orglaugh

Honestly, the cooking I've seen come from ex's and other chick friends hasn't really been anything I wouldn't have done better myself. Aside from a couple exceptions, I'd rather eat what my dog drags home ffrom his adventures. Dinner is my deal, that is my shit, I will cook my food thnx. I learned a long time ago that id I wanted to eat good I'd have to do it for myself. It blows my mind to see the difficulty some people have making rice, or boiling noodles. If she can manage like, some pie perhaps. Fresh pie and cookies, and that would be the shit. Blowing would be a bonus. Like homemade breads and jellies. Jams, and pies and jellies and shit. Ya, I want a horny farm girl. Like an amish chick or a hutterite....

Why do some men have dogs as wives?

12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting

That is awesome...I needed a good laugh

Very funny list!

has it occured to you 1 in every 1000 white males fantasize about sodomizing their pets ?

agreed.. I'd rather cook and do my own dishes than deal with a ball and chain..