Chuck norris reponds to all the "chuck norris facts" - GoFuckYourself.com

sonofsam · 01-10-2006, 11:08 PM

My personal favourite is

"before there was science, it was believed autumn occurred when chuck norris round house kicked every single tree in existence"

http://www.chucknorris.com/html/events.aspx

more chuck norris facts:

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/

pornguy · 01-10-2006, 11:09 PM

Man you are on a total norris " Kick "

AsianDivaGirlsWebDude · 01-10-2006, 11:11 PM

We need Conan to pull on his "Chuck Norris lever"...

ADG Webmaster

Nismo · 01-10-2006, 11:16 PM

I'm very proud of these literary efforts.
~ Chuck Norris

BradM · 01-10-2006, 11:18 PM

I love those things.

jasonir · 01-10-2006, 11:22 PM

"If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'til." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face. " LMAO

Pornwolf · 01-10-2006, 11:24 PM

Why is there so much interest in Chuck norris? I haven't thought about him since '85

PixeLs · 01-11-2006, 12:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pornwolf

Why is there so much interest in Chuck norris? I haven't thought about him since '85

Take all your words back; he's watching this thread!

Doctor Dre · 01-11-2006, 12:14 AM

HHAHAAHA

At least he says the true ... poor dude ;)

Pornwolf · 01-11-2006, 12:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PixeLs

Take all your words back; he's watching this thread!

Oh, maybe you are right. I wouldn't wanna get a roundhouse to the skull now would I?

Gunni · 01-11-2006, 12:30 AM

My favourites

"Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits. "

"Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers
the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing. "

chadglni · 01-11-2006, 12:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gunni

My favourites

"Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits. "

"Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers
the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing. "

They never get old.

JuiceMonkey · 01-11-2006, 12:47 AM

Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.

AsianDivaGirlsWebDude · 01-11-2006, 12:56 AM

I bumped into Chuck Norris at a hotel bar in Houston back in the mid-90's. I was sitting, talking and drinking, with an actor that had appeared in the Steve McQueen movie "The Sand Pebbles", when Norris walked up and said..."You ready?"

The actor I was speaking to excused himself, and they left...

That is my Chuck Norris moment.

ADG Webmaster

SmokeyTheBear · 01-11-2006, 01:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pornwolf

Why is there so much interest in Chuck norris? I haven't thought about him since '85

conan obrian

Jarmusch · 01-11-2006, 01:20 AM

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

tristan_D · 01-11-2006, 01:33 AM

Chuck Norris sheds off new skin every decade.

reynold · 01-11-2006, 04:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jarmusch

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

who · 01-11-2006, 04:34 AM

They really were developing a WMD in Iraq, it was a Chuck Norris clone.

DWB · 01-11-2006, 04:37 AM

"If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death."

HAHAHA. I have not this hard in a while. Thanks for the link.

who · 01-11-2006, 04:39 AM

The Big Bang started when Chuck Norris performed his very first roundhouse kick.

GTS Mark · 01-11-2006, 04:42 AM

Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress

LOLOLOLOLOL!!!

DH

who · 01-11-2006, 04:45 AM

candyflip · 01-11-2006, 06:15 AM

This one is my fave.

"Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris "

selena · 01-11-2006, 06:23 AM

Those were awesome! Thanks for sharing.

"Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this "a slow Tuesday."

Shok · 01-11-2006, 06:30 AM

Chuck Norris lives about 1/4 mile from me

I see him about twice a month

geirlur · 01-11-2006, 07:47 AM

"In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten."

Haha..

Phoenix · 01-11-2006, 07:49 AM

how much would could a chuck norris chuck if a chuck norris could chuck would

Herb Kornfield · 01-11-2006, 07:58 AM

http://www.chucknorris.com/html/events.aspx

I think that Chuck is reading GFY

G-Rotica · 01-11-2006, 08:25 AM

"Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris. "

LMAO

Ogix · 01-11-2006, 08:29 AM

Chuck Norris is cool man

sickkittens · 01-11-2006, 08:31 AM

Look at Chuck using this to try to sell his books.

adamthick · 01-11-2006, 08:44 AM

There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.

HammerALL · 01-11-2006, 08:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by G-Rotica

"Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris. "

LMAO

Rinaldo · 01-11-2006, 09:21 AM

CHuck Norris isn't hung like a horse, Horses are hung like chuck norris

Ogix · 01-11-2006, 09:27 AM

i think that steven seagle is much better :P

Violetta · 01-11-2006, 09:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sonofsam

My personal favourite is

"before there was science, it was believed autumn occurred when chuck norris round house kicked every single tree in existence"

Thanks for the best laugh this week!

01-10-2006, 11:08 PM	#1
sonofsam Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Vancouver Posts: 18,638	Chuck norris reponds to all the "chuck norris facts" My personal favourite is "before there was science, it was believed autumn occurred when chuck norris round house kicked every single tree in existence" http://www.chucknorris.com/html/events.aspx more chuck norris facts: http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/ __________________ I like turtles.

01-10-2006, 11:09 PM	#2
pornguy Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Homeless Posts: 62,911	Man you are on a total norris " Kick " __________________ PornGuy skype me pornguy_epic AmateurDough The Hottes Shemales online! TChicks.com \| Angeles Cid \| Mariana Cordoba \| MAILERS WELCOME!

01-10-2006, 11:11 PM	#3
AsianDivaGirlsWebDude Purveyor, Fine Asian Porn Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: San Francisco Bay Area Posts: 38,323	We need Conan to pull on his "Chuck Norris lever"... ADG Webmaster __________________ Asian Diva Girls - Exclusive Photos and Videos Asian Diva Girls Affiliate Program (50% ccBill Revshare)

01-10-2006, 11:16 PM	#4
Nismo Confirmed User Join Date: May 2002 Location: FLORIDA Posts: 4,977	I'm very proud of these literary efforts. ~ Chuck Norris __________________ i buy massive xxx dating traffic.

01-10-2006, 11:22 PM	#6
jasonir Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Toro'no Posts: 1,887	"If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'til." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face. " LMAO __________________ ICQ: 61689996

01-10-2006, 11:18 PM	#5
BradM Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: 1123,6536,5231 Posts: 3,397	I love those things.

01-10-2006, 11:24 PM	#7
Pornwolf Drunk and Unruly Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Hollywood Posts: 22,712	Why is there so much interest in Chuck norris? I haven't thought about him since '85 __________________ I've trusted my sites to them for over a decade... Webair, bitches.

01-11-2006, 12:30 AM	#11
Gunni Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Barcelona Posts: 2,385	My favourites "Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits. " "Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing. "

01-11-2006, 12:47 AM	#13
JuiceMonkey Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Brisbane/Vancouver/SanFran Posts: 3,581	Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice. __________________ ICQ: 72251955 GTalk: JuiceMonkey

01-11-2006, 12:56 AM	#14
AsianDivaGirlsWebDude Purveyor, Fine Asian Porn Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: San Francisco Bay Area Posts: 38,323	I bumped into Chuck Norris at a hotel bar in Houston back in the mid-90's. I was sitting, talking and drinking, with an actor that had appeared in the Steve McQueen movie "The Sand Pebbles", when Norris walked up and said..."You ready?" The actor I was speaking to excused himself, and they left... That is my Chuck Norris moment. ADG Webmaster __________________ Asian Diva Girls - Exclusive Photos and Videos Asian Diva Girls Affiliate Program (50% ccBill Revshare)

01-11-2006, 01:20 AM	#16
Jarmusch Industry Role: Join Date: May 2003 Posts: 12,464	There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

01-11-2006, 01:33 AM	#17
tristan_D Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 7,865	Chuck Norris sheds off new skin every decade. __________________ Increase your sales. Up to $4 per click.

01-11-2006, 04:34 AM	#19
who So Fucking Banned Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: ICQ #23642053 Posts: 19,593	They really were developing a WMD in Iraq, it was a Chuck Norris clone.

01-11-2006, 04:37 AM	#20
DWB Registered User Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Encrypted. Access denied. Posts: 31,779	"If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death." HAHAHA. I have not this hard in a while. Thanks for the link.

01-11-2006, 04:39 AM	#21
who So Fucking Banned Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: ICQ #23642053 Posts: 19,593	The Big Bang started when Chuck Norris performed his very first roundhouse kick.

01-11-2006, 04:42 AM	#22
GTS Mark Vrume Mark Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Toronto, Canada Posts: 20,912	Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress LOLOLOLOLOL!!! DH

01-11-2006, 04:45 AM	#23
who So Fucking Banned Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: ICQ #23642053 Posts: 19,593

01-11-2006, 06:15 AM	#24
candyflip Carpe Visio Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: New York Posts: 43,064	This one is my fave. "Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris " __________________ Spend you some brain. Email Me

01-11-2006, 06:23 AM	#25
selena Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: On The Edge Posts: 7,994	Those were awesome! Thanks for sharing. "Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this "a slow Tuesday." __________________ ~ Doer of Things at MetArtMoney Where Flawless Beauty Meets Art ~The MetArt Network ~ selena.delgado9

01-11-2006, 06:30 AM	#26
Shok Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: LIVE EVIL Posts: 5,611	Chuck Norris lives about 1/4 mile from me I see him about twice a month

01-11-2006, 07:47 AM	#27
geirlur Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Æøå Posts: 2,013	"In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten." Haha.. __________________ BitUnix - My favorite place to trade crypto!

01-11-2006, 07:49 AM	#28
Phoenix BACON BACON BACON Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Poems everybody, the laddie fancies himself a poet Posts: 35,462	how much would could a chuck norris chuck if a chuck norris could chuck would __________________ Skype Phoenixskype1 Telegram PhoenixBrad https://quantads.io

01-11-2006, 07:58 AM	#29
Herb Kornfield Is on the 1 Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Philly Burbs Posts: 4,996	http://www.chucknorris.com/html/events.aspx I think that Chuck is reading GFY

01-11-2006, 08:25 AM	#30
G-Rotica Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 4,258	"Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris. " LMAO __________________

01-11-2006, 08:29 AM	#31
Ogix Registered User Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Banned Posts: 1,025	Chuck Norris is cool man

01-11-2006, 08:31 AM	#32
sickkittens I am a meat popsicle. Join Date: Jul 2002 Posts: 25,100	Look at Chuck using this to try to sell his books. __________________ HIGHEST PAYOUTS FOR NO-CONSOLE TOURS IN THE ENTIRE INDUSTRY! THIS SIG CAN BE YOURS FOR $200 - ICQ: 78881543

01-11-2006, 08:44 AM	#33
adamthick Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: metro Detroit Posts: 377	There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist. __________________ Stealth Ringtones to SuperSize your Womans boobs!

01-11-2006, 09:21 AM	#35
Rinaldo Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: South Florida Posts: 5,086	CHuck Norris isn't hung like a horse, Horses are hung like chuck norris

01-11-2006, 09:27 AM	#36
Ogix Registered User Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Banned Posts: 1,025	i think that steven seagle is much better :P