Chuck norris reponds to all the "chuck norris facts"

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  • sonofsam
    Too lazy to set a custom title
    • Dec 2004
    • 18642

    #1

    Chuck norris reponds to all the "chuck norris facts"



    My personal favourite is

    "before there was science, it was believed autumn occurred when chuck norris round house kicked every single tree in existence"


    http://www.chucknorris.com/html/events.aspx



    more chuck norris facts:

    http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/
    I like turtles.
  • pornguy
    Too lazy to set a custom title
    • Mar 2003
    • 62912

    #2
    Man you are on a total norris " Kick "
    PornGuy skype me pornguy_epic

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    • AsianDivaGirlsWebDude
      Purveyor, Fine Asian Porn
      • Jul 2004
      • 38323

      #3
      We need Conan to pull on his "Chuck Norris lever"...

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      • Nismo
        Confirmed User
        • May 2002
        • 4977

        #4
        I'm very proud of these literary efforts.
        ~ Chuck Norris
        i buy massive xxx dating traffic.

        Comment

        • BradM
          Confirmed User
          • Dec 2003
          • 3397

          #5
          I love those things.

          Comment

          • jasonir
            Confirmed User
            • Aug 2002
            • 1887

            #6
            "If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'til." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face. " LMAO
            ICQ: 61689996

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            • Pornwolf
              Drunk and Unruly
              • Jan 2002
              • 22712

              #7
              Why is there so much interest in Chuck norris? I haven't thought about him since '85
              I've trusted my sites to them for over a decade...

              Webair, bitches.

              Comment

              • PixeLs
                Too lazy to set a custom title
                • Jul 2005
                • 11922

                #8
                Originally posted by Pornwolf
                Why is there so much interest in Chuck norris? I haven't thought about him since '85
                Take all your words back; he's watching this thread!

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                • Doctor Dre
                  Too lazy to set a custom title
                  • Jan 2001
                  • 51692

                  #9
                  HHAHAAHA

                  At least he says the true ... poor dude ;)
                  Originally posted by rayadp05
                  I rebooted, deleted temp files, history, cookies and everything...still cannot view the news clip. All I see is that fucking gay ass music video from "Rick Roll". Anyone else have a different link to the news clip?

                  Comment

                  • Pornwolf
                    Drunk and Unruly
                    • Jan 2002
                    • 22712

                    #10
                    Originally posted by PixeLs
                    Take all your words back; he's watching this thread!
                    Oh, maybe you are right. I wouldn't wanna get a roundhouse to the skull now would I?
                    I've trusted my sites to them for over a decade...

                    Webair, bitches.

                    Comment

                    • Gunni
                      Confirmed User
                      • Apr 2003
                      • 2385

                      #11
                      My favourites

                      "Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits. "

                      "Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers
                      the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing. "

                      Comment

                      • chadglni
                        Confirmed User
                        • Dec 2002
                        • 6924

                        #12
                        Originally posted by Gunni
                        My favourites

                        "Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits. "

                        "Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers
                        the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing. "
                        They never get old.


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                        • JuiceMonkey
                          Confirmed User
                          • Oct 2004
                          • 3581

                          #13
                          Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.
                          ICQ: 72251955 GTalk: JuiceMonkey

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                          • AsianDivaGirlsWebDude
                            Purveyor, Fine Asian Porn
                            • Jul 2004
                            • 38323

                            #14
                            I bumped into Chuck Norris at a hotel bar in Houston back in the mid-90's. I was sitting, talking and drinking, with an actor that had appeared in the Steve McQueen movie "The Sand Pebbles", when Norris walked up and said..."You ready?"

                            The actor I was speaking to excused himself, and they left...

                            That is my Chuck Norris moment.

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                            • SmokeyTheBear
                              ►SouthOfHeaven
                              • Jun 2004
                              • 28609

                              #15
                              Originally posted by Pornwolf
                              Why is there so much interest in Chuck norris? I haven't thought about him since '85
                              conan obrian
                              hatisblack at yahoo.com

                              Comment

                              • Jarmusch
                                 
                                • May 2003
                                • 12479

                                #16
                                There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

                                Comment

                                • tristan_D
                                  Confirmed User
                                  • Jul 2005
                                  • 7865

                                  #17
                                  Chuck Norris sheds off new skin every decade.
                                  Increase your sales. Up to $4 per click.

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                                  • reynold
                                    Too lazy to set a custom title
                                    • Oct 2002
                                    • 51271

                                    #18
                                    Originally posted by Jarmusch
                                    There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

                                    Comment

                                    • who
                                      So Fucking Banned
                                      • Aug 2003
                                      • 19593

                                      #19
                                      They really were developing a WMD in Iraq, it was a Chuck Norris clone.

                                      Comment

                                      • DWB
                                        Registered User
                                        • Jul 2003
                                        • 31779

                                        #20
                                        "If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death."

                                        HAHAHA. I have not this hard in a while. Thanks for the link.

                                        Comment

                                        • who
                                          So Fucking Banned
                                          • Aug 2003
                                          • 19593

                                          #21
                                          The Big Bang started when Chuck Norris performed his very first roundhouse kick.

                                          Comment

                                          • GTS Mark
                                            Vrume Mark
                                            • Jan 2001
                                            • 20912

                                            #22
                                            Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress

                                            LOLOLOLOLOL!!!

                                            DH

                                            Comment

                                            • who
                                              So Fucking Banned
                                              • Aug 2003
                                              • 19593

                                              #23

                                              Comment

                                              • candyflip
                                                Carpe Visio
                                                • Jul 2002
                                                • 43069

                                                #24
                                                This one is my fave.

                                                "Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris "

                                                Spend you some brain.
                                                Email Me

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                                                • selena
                                                  Confirmed User
                                                  • Aug 2004
                                                  • 7995

                                                  #25
                                                  Those were awesome! Thanks for sharing.

                                                  "Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this "a slow Tuesday."
                                                  ~
                                                  Doer of Things at
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                                                  • Shok
                                                    Confirmed User
                                                    • Apr 2001
                                                    • 5611

                                                    #26
                                                    Chuck Norris lives about 1/4 mile from me

                                                    I see him about twice a month

                                                    Comment

                                                    • geirlur
                                                      Confirmed User
                                                      • Aug 2001
                                                      • 2025

                                                      #27
                                                      "In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten."

                                                      Haha..
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                                                      Comment

                                                      • Phoenix
                                                        BACON BACON BACON
                                                        • Nov 2002
                                                        • 35475

                                                        #28
                                                        how much would could a chuck norris chuck if a chuck norris could chuck would
                                                        Telegram PhoenixBrad
                                                        https://quantads.io

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                                                        • Herb Kornfield
                                                          Is on the 1
                                                          • Sep 2002
                                                          • 4996

                                                          #29
                                                          http://www.chucknorris.com/html/events.aspx


                                                          I think that Chuck is reading GFY

                                                          Comment

                                                          • G-Rotica
                                                            Confirmed User
                                                            • Aug 2005
                                                            • 4258

                                                            #30
                                                            "Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris. "

                                                            LMAO

                                                            Comment

                                                            • Ogix
                                                              Registered User
                                                              • Feb 2005
                                                              • 1025

                                                              #31
                                                              Chuck Norris is cool man

                                                              Comment

                                                              • sickkittens
                                                                I am a meat popsicle.
                                                                • Jul 2002
                                                                • 25100

                                                                #32
                                                                Look at Chuck using this to try to sell his books.

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                                                                • adamthick
                                                                  Confirmed User
                                                                  • Apr 2004
                                                                  • 377

                                                                  #33
                                                                  There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.


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                                                                  • HammerALL
                                                                    Confirmed User
                                                                    • Apr 2004
                                                                    • 3506

                                                                    #34
                                                                    Originally posted by G-Rotica
                                                                    "Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris. "

                                                                    LMAO

                                                                    Mario Amaral AKA: Hammerall
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                                                                    • Rinaldo
                                                                      Confirmed User
                                                                      • Sep 2003
                                                                      • 5086

                                                                      #35
                                                                      CHuck Norris isn't hung like a horse, Horses are hung like chuck norris

                                                                      Comment

                                                                      • Ogix
                                                                        Registered User
                                                                        • Feb 2005
                                                                        • 1025

                                                                        #36
                                                                        i think that steven seagle is much better :P

                                                                        Comment

                                                                        • Violetta
                                                                          Affiliate
                                                                          • Jul 2004
                                                                          • 28735

                                                                          #37
                                                                          Originally posted by sonofsam


                                                                          My personal favourite is

                                                                          "before there was science, it was believed autumn occurred when chuck norris round house kicked every single tree in existence"
                                                                          Thanks for the best laugh this week!
                                                                          M&A Queen

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