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Old 11-05-2005, 04:12 AM   #1
AaronM
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Where can I buy a midget?

Dwarf, little person, midget, troll....Some oompa loompa looking mother fucker?

Kid Rock has one. So does Joe from Girls Gone Wild. And then there was the Holio midget guy......

I must acquire one as soon as possible.

He can sleep in my trophy case next to the glass dildo "Woody Award" D$ gave a brotha at the Players Ball.

It'll be SCHWEEEEEEEEET!
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Old 11-05-2005, 04:13 AM   #2
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why don't you just ask Ross to fly over?

he's no real midget, but I'm sure he wouldn't mind sleeping next to that 'glass dildo'
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Old 11-05-2005, 04:50 AM   #3
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wtf lol
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Old 11-05-2005, 04:52 AM   #4
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you could pass off as a fat midget
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Old 11-05-2005, 05:05 AM   #5
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It would be cool to have a midget butler wearing a suit walking around with a drinks tray on hat
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Old 11-05-2005, 05:08 AM   #6
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Dunno about buying one.. But you can rent one... http://www.rent-a-midget.com/
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Old 11-05-2005, 06:14 AM   #7
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Walmart, in the garden section next to the gnomes. They're on the bottom shelf, you gotta bend down to see them.
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Old 11-05-2005, 06:41 AM   #8
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Dunno about buying one.. But you can rent one... http://www.rent-a-midget.com/
You can buy one...

http://www.BuyAMidget.com is already reg'd so someone's going to be selling soon... I assume just in time for christmas


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Old 11-05-2005, 06:46 AM   #9
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the little guy,,Joe C from Kid Rock passed away a few years ago

I hear you can rent out beetlejuice from the howard stern show
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Old 11-05-2005, 06:46 AM   #10
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Dunno about buying one.. But you can rent one... http://www.rent-a-midget.com/
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Old 11-05-2005, 02:52 PM   #11
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find a cyrcus, they always have some spare midgets there

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Old 11-05-2005, 02:54 PM   #12
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Sorry, I misread it as 'widget' and was going to say Ebay
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Old 11-05-2005, 02:55 PM   #13
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theres a few for sale in thailand
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Old 11-05-2005, 03:16 PM   #14
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the plane! the plane!
here comes the Mutha Fucken plane!
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Old 11-05-2005, 03:28 PM   #15
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Originally Posted by kmanrox
theres a few for sale in thailand

I wish they were as available here. My midget will need to speak perfect English and be a U.S. Citizen who is licensed to carry firearms.

He's gonna pull double duty as a bodyguard.
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Old 11-05-2005, 03:32 PM   #16
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Here's the pefect place and the midget pics are classic

Hire a Midget lol
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Old 11-05-2005, 03:37 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AaronM
Dwarf, little person, midget, troll....Some oompa loompa looking mother fucker?

you could pass for a midget yourself, fatboy....
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Old 11-05-2005, 03:39 PM   #18
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the midget actually looks somewhat normal..
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Old 11-05-2005, 03:41 PM   #19
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Old 11-05-2005, 03:46 PM   #20
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-------------------------
True Life Midget Story.

Important note: Midgets may seem cool, but are still sensitive! OK, so DeeAnn wants some movies, so I walk out to go pick 'em up. On my journey, I am at an intersection and waiting for the light to change standing next to... you guessed it - a full-blown 100% midget.Ý Here's the conversation (you know, one of those "bored, waiting for signal to change so you feel like you gotta talk to the person next to you" ones):

Midget: You're pretty tall

Me: Yeah - you're pretty short pause

Midget: Well I'm a midget

Me: That explains it.

Midget (yes, out of nowhere this is said - with no real pause - also said kind of excitedly/happily): I'm going to get beer.

Me: Uh, OK.Ý (at this point, thinking maybe we are sort of on a similar wave length and this midget is kind of cool about his midgetness) -- So, do regular beers seem really, really big to you?Ý Since you're a midget and all?

(pause - during which time I think I have fucked up)

Midget: Fuck you.

Me: Um, OK.Ý Sorry. uncomfortable silence until the signal changes and I take advantage of big people's legs and make sure to walk really fast ahead and away...)

That's pretty much a literal transcription, and yes, it really did happen. Once again, exercising my ability to misread people and show great tact...
----------------------
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Old 11-05-2005, 04:48 PM   #21
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lmao@Smokeythebear
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Old 11-05-2005, 04:53 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kowntafit
It would be cool to have a midget butler wearing a suit walking around with a drinks tray on hat


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Old 11-05-2005, 04:54 PM   #23
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Walmart, in the garden section next to the gnomes. They're on the bottom shelf, you gotta bend down to see them.
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Old 11-05-2005, 04:56 PM   #24
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Just look in your pants, midget dick.
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Old 11-05-2005, 04:59 PM   #25
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Old 11-05-2005, 05:00 PM   #26
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Smokey. Why do I believe that this could happen to you.

Aaron, Dont cut your self short on this deal. Get a female midget US citizen, so that she can also give you blowjobs, and be a security guard.
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Old 11-05-2005, 05:39 PM   #27
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Hey look...Here's two troll mother fuckers already.

Quote:
Originally Posted by bashbug
you could pass off as a fat midget
Quote:
Originally Posted by Citizen Cain
you could pass for a midget yourself, fatboy....
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Old 11-05-2005, 06:13 PM   #28
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I wish they were as available here. My midget will need to speak perfect English and be a U.S. Citizen who is licensed to carry firearms.

He's gonna pull double duty as a bodyguard.
You'd be able to get into all the talk shows with that ... Pornographer with bodyguard midget !
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I rebooted, deleted temp files, history, cookies and everything...still cannot view the news clip. All I see is that fucking gay ass music video from "Rick Roll". Anyone else have a different link to the news clip?
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Old 11-05-2005, 06:14 PM   #29
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the midget actually looks somewhat normal..
God knows how that style is fucking ugly
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I rebooted, deleted temp files, history, cookies and everything...still cannot view the news clip. All I see is that fucking gay ass music video from "Rick Roll". Anyone else have a different link to the news clip?
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Old 11-05-2005, 06:14 PM   #30
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Aaron, from what I remember, arent you already a midget?

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Old 11-05-2005, 06:15 PM   #31
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Smokey, It probably don't cost them much to get drunk as hell ;)
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I rebooted, deleted temp files, history, cookies and everything...still cannot view the news clip. All I see is that fucking gay ass music video from "Rick Roll". Anyone else have a different link to the news clip?
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Old 11-05-2005, 06:17 PM   #32
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Hey look...Here's two troll mother fuckers already.
you are the biggest troll here, asshole ...
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Old 11-05-2005, 06:27 PM   #33
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Old 11-05-2005, 06:31 PM   #34
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Dwarf, little person, midget, troll....Some oompa loompa looking mother fucker?

Kid Rock has one. So does Joe from Girls Gone Wild. And then there was the Holio midget guy......

I must acquire one as soon as possible.

He can sleep in my trophy case next to the glass dildo "Woody Award" D$ gave a brotha at the Players Ball.

It'll be SCHWEEEEEEEEET!

DIE MIDGET LOVER
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Old 11-05-2005, 06:34 PM   #35
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Try before you buy: Rent A Troll
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Old 11-05-2005, 07:00 PM   #36
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Is juicy for sale?
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