beer vs vagina - GoFuckYourself.com

MR2raymond · 10-18-2005, 11:08 AM

THE ULTIMATE CONTEST
Message: This is a riot jayvee! haha =)

Message: BEER VS VAGINA CONTEST

1.Beer is always wet. Vagina needs a little work.
One point to BEER

2.Warm beer tastes awful.
One point to VAGINA

3.A really cold beer is satisfying.
One point to BEER

4.If after taking a swig of your favourite beer you
find a
hair
between your teeth, you may vomit.
One point to VAGINA

5. If you get home reeking of beer your wife may
get
mad, make a
scene, kick you out, etc. If you get home reeking
of
vagina your wife
may get mad, kick you out, even leave you.
There's
definitely a point
to be had here, depending on your point of view
and
personal
circumstances. I'll just call it a DRAW for the time
being.

6. Ten beers in one night and you can't drive home.
Ten vaginas in
one night and you don't want to drive anywhere.
One
point to VAGINA

7. If you have a lot of beer in a public place, your
reputation may
suffer. If you eat any vagina in public, you become
a
legend.
One point to VAGINA

8. If a cop stops you and you smell of beer you
may
get arrested. If
you smell of vagina he may buy you a beer. One
point
to VAGINA

9. You normally don't find old beer.
One point to BEER

10. Too much beer and you'll think you see flying
saucers. Too much
vagina and you'll think you've seen God. One point
to
VAGINA

11. Ripping off a beer bottle label is boring. Ripping
off
panties is
fun. One point to VAGINA

12. In most countries there's a tax on beer.
One point to VAGINA

13. If you have another beer the first one never
gets
pissed off. One
point to BEER

14. You can always be sure if you're the first one
to
open a bottle
or a can. One point to BEER

15. If you shake beer it'll get all agitated but
eventually it
settles down. One point to BEER

16. With beer you always have choice: clear, dark,
pilsner,ale,lager,etc One point to BEER

17. You always know how much beer is going to
cost
One point to BEER

18. Beer doesn't have a mother
One point to BEER

19. Beer never expects to be hugged for half an
hour
after you
drink it One point to BEER

FINAL SCORE: BEER: 10 VAGINA: 8

That's it! The matter is settled, the clear winner is:
BEER

PS: If you are a woman and at this point feel
angry,
degraded or
discriminated against, just remember that Beer
would
experience none of those feelings, let alone
express
them, an extra point for BEER

8 Characters · 10-18-2005, 11:14 AM

You can hide beer around the house really easily.

+ 1 for beer.

Scott McD · 10-18-2005, 11:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MR2raymond

8. If a cop stops you and you smell of beer you
may
get arrested. If
you smell of vagina he may buy you a beer. One
point
to VAGINA

Babagirls · 10-18-2005, 11:17 AM

8. If a cop stops you and you smell of beer you
may
get arrested. If
you smell of vagina he may buy you a beer. One
point
to VAGINA

tell me, what cop would buy a dude beer?

EroticySteve · 10-18-2005, 11:18 AM

That's funny. I am going to use that next time I have to break up with a crazy.

pornguy · 10-18-2005, 11:19 AM

That is a great one.

8 Characters · 10-18-2005, 11:19 AM

If you smell like beer you don't attract beer, but if you smell like vagina you might attract the holy grail.. LESBIANS..

+ 1 to vagina.

u-Bob · 10-18-2005, 11:23 AM

hehe

lisa k · 10-18-2005, 11:39 AM

I've seen it before but it's still a funny list!

BlingDaddy · 10-18-2005, 11:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 8 Characters

If you smell like beer you don't attract beer, but if you smell like vagina you might attract the holy grail.. LESBIANS..

+ 1 to vagina.

LMAO

smack · 10-18-2005, 11:42 AM

Quote:

2.Warm beer tastes awful.

warm beer does not taste aweful, americans just drink shitty beer.

seeric · 10-18-2005, 11:42 AM

beer wins hands down jsut becasue i dont have to argue with it.

LauraLee · 10-18-2005, 11:44 AM

Too much beer and you'll get fat.

1 pt vagina.

Funbrunette · 10-18-2005, 11:44 AM

Good one!

blackmonsters · 10-18-2005, 11:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MR2raymond

16. With beer you always have choice: clear, dark,
pilsner,ale,lager,etc One point to BEER

No,
Vagina : Black(Jet, ebony, redbone, Hi-yella, mulatto); Asian(Japan, China, Korean, Thai, Viet...etc); Caucasian(German, Brit, Nordic, Italian, Spanish)...Blonde, brunette, red...etc...

3 points to vagina for having multiple sub-categories.

Mike AAG · 10-18-2005, 12:03 PM

why the need to choose?

as long as both are around, im a happy man!

ChefJeff · 10-18-2005, 12:57 PM

I'll take pussy over beer anyday.

iwantchixx · 10-18-2005, 01:22 PM

I'd give my votes to vagina. Vagina is free. Beer cost $20 a case. Fuck that noise.

Chris E · 10-18-2005, 01:25 PM

tenderobject · 10-18-2005, 01:30 PM

Libertine · 10-18-2005, 01:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LauraLee

Too much beer and you'll get fat.

1 pt vagina.

Too much vagina and you'll get the clap.

1pt beer.

axelcat · 10-18-2005, 01:38 PM

IwantU Bryan · 10-18-2005, 01:40 PM

Seen it before, really good one....

ElvisManson · 10-18-2005, 01:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mike AAG

why the need to choose?

as long as both are around, im a happy man!

Couldn't have said it better myself.

Matt Collins · 10-18-2005, 01:50 PM

This is very funny, but it is a close call either way :-)

Semi-Retired-Dave · 10-18-2005, 01:55 PM

That's funny. Good read.

Swappernet · 10-18-2005, 02:05 PM

Kind of reminds me of the old saying I heard somewhere not sure if I remember it correcly but chalk one more up for vagina:

whats the worst thing about being a dick?

1. you have a swollen bald head with its own brain

2. you are being followed around by a pair of nuts

3. your next door neighbor is an asshole

4. your best friend is a vagina - so one more point for vagina

Holly · 10-18-2005, 02:06 PM

90% of this board has never seen a vagina in real life and isn't old enough to buy a beer.

1 pt to reality

Libertine · 10-18-2005, 02:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Holly

90% of this board has never seen a vagina in real life and isn't old enough to buy a beer.

1 pt to reality

Hah! You don't know what the hell you're talking about! My older brother sometimes buys beer for me and this one time, I sneaked a peek at my older sister in the bathroom, so there!

LittleMack · 10-18-2005, 02:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Holly

90% of this board has never seen a vagina in real life and isn't old enough to buy a beer.

1 pt to reality

So fucking true.

nofx · 10-18-2005, 02:59 PM

i'll take beer any day

Holly Lez! · 10-18-2005, 03:01 PM

I pick vagina over beer anyday!

reynold · 10-18-2005, 10:18 PM

Fuck, why choose if you can have both?

Vitasoy · 10-18-2005, 11:11 PM

those are great... can't deny beer nor pussy though

nofx · 10-18-2005, 11:20 PM

yer sig is great

Th!nk · 10-19-2005, 01:36 AM

You made your point! It's funny, but i still choose vagina over beer, cause i always love the heavenly feeling the vagina can give me!

Mefo · 10-19-2005, 02:14 AM

I love your sig lol

Mefo · 10-19-2005, 02:14 AM

oh btw also a cool post

GeeDee · 10-19-2005, 02:16 AM

A vagina gives me a good and warm feeling even if i have too much! But if I have too much beer thenthings go wrong and i get a totally different feeling

10-18-2005, 11:08 AM	#1
MR2raymond Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: All of the Above Posts: 1,428	beer vs vagina THE ULTIMATE CONTEST Message: This is a riot jayvee! haha =) Message: BEER VS VAGINA CONTEST 1.Beer is always wet. Vagina needs a little work. One point to BEER 2.Warm beer tastes awful. One point to VAGINA 3.A really cold beer is satisfying. One point to BEER 4.If after taking a swig of your favourite beer you find a hair between your teeth, you may vomit. One point to VAGINA 5. If you get home reeking of beer your wife may get mad, make a scene, kick you out, etc. If you get home reeking of vagina your wife may get mad, kick you out, even leave you. There's definitely a point to be had here, depending on your point of view and personal circumstances. I'll just call it a DRAW for the time being. 6. Ten beers in one night and you can't drive home. Ten vaginas in one night and you don't want to drive anywhere. One point to VAGINA 7. If you have a lot of beer in a public place, your reputation may suffer. If you eat any vagina in public, you become a legend. One point to VAGINA 8. If a cop stops you and you smell of beer you may get arrested. If you smell of vagina he may buy you a beer. One point to VAGINA 9. You normally don't find old beer. One point to BEER 10. Too much beer and you'll think you see flying saucers. Too much vagina and you'll think you've seen God. One point to VAGINA 11. Ripping off a beer bottle label is boring. Ripping off panties is fun. One point to VAGINA 12. In most countries there's a tax on beer. One point to VAGINA 13. If you have another beer the first one never gets pissed off. One point to BEER 14. You can always be sure if you're the first one to open a bottle or a can. One point to BEER 15. If you shake beer it'll get all agitated but eventually it settles down. One point to BEER 16. With beer you always have choice: clear, dark, pilsner,ale,lager,etc One point to BEER 17. You always know how much beer is going to cost One point to BEER 18. Beer doesn't have a mother One point to BEER 19. Beer never expects to be hugged for half an hour after you drink it One point to BEER FINAL SCORE: BEER: 10 VAGINA: 8 That's it! The matter is settled, the clear winner is: BEER PS: If you are a woman and at this point feel angry, degraded or discriminated against, just remember that Beer would experience none of those feelings, let alone express them, an extra point for BEER __________________ ICQ : 233 056 425 [email protected]

10-18-2005, 11:17 AM	#4
Babagirls Text Writer Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Wisconsin Posts: 18,812	8. If a cop stops you and you smell of beer you may get arrested. If you smell of vagina he may buy you a beer. One point to VAGINA tell me, what cop would buy a dude beer? __________________ Need a Text Writer? Blogs\|Reviews\|Descriptions\|Paysites\|TGP's\|Stories ICQ: 397892500

10-18-2005, 11:18 AM	#5
EroticySteve Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: The Sunshine State Posts: 4,365	That's funny. I am going to use that next time I have to break up with a crazy. __________________ You deserve to make more money. I'll help you do that. Our affiliates earn up to $3/email or $107/sale email steve <at> eroticy.com - icq 290153464

10-18-2005, 11:19 AM	#6
pornguy Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Homeless Posts: 62,911	That is a great one. __________________ PornGuy skype me pornguy_epic AmateurDough The Hottes Shemales online! TChicks.com \| Angeles Cid \| Mariana Cordoba \| MAILERS WELCOME!

10-18-2005, 11:39 AM	#9
lisa k Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Columbus, Ohio Posts: 587	I've seen it before but it's still a funny list! __________________ ICQ 319-675-425

10-18-2005, 11:14 AM	#2
8 Characters So Fucking Banned Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: This month's character: Dirty Franck Posts: 2,336	You can hide beer around the house really easily. + 1 for beer.

10-18-2005, 11:23 AM	#8
u-Bob there's no $$$ in porn Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: icq: 195./568.-230 (btw: not getting offline msgs) Posts: 33,063	hehe

10-18-2005, 11:42 AM	#12
seeric .......... Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: .......... Posts: 41,917	beer wins hands down jsut becasue i dont have to argue with it.

10-18-2005, 11:44 AM	#13
LauraLee Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: (Still) One Touch Cockie Posts: 3,821	Too much beer and you'll get fat. 1 pt vagina. __________________ Priority Payout skype lauralee.bunker LL's Email

10-18-2005, 11:44 AM	#14
Funbrunette Confirmed User Join Date: May 2002 Location: Montreal, Canada Posts: 4,834	Good one! __________________ Stephanie (Funbrunette) [email protected] ICQ: 155-713-409

10-18-2005, 12:03 PM	#16
Mike AAG Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Leeds, UK Posts: 142	why the need to choose? as long as both are around, im a happy man! __________________ SIG TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60. Let me repeat... A 120 x 60 button and no more that 3 lines of DEFAULT SIZE AND COLOR text.

10-18-2005, 12:57 PM	#17
ChefJeff Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Arizona Posts: 1,499	I'll take pussy over beer anyday.

10-18-2005, 01:22 PM	#18
iwantchixx Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: The Boonies Posts: 12,860	I'd give my votes to vagina. Vagina is free. Beer cost $20 a case. Fuck that noise.

10-18-2005, 01:25 PM	#19
Chris E Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2003 Posts: 2,895

10-18-2005, 01:30 PM	#20
tenderobject Need Designs? 312352846 Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Somewhere Posts: 11,687	__________________ NEED DESIGNS?!?

10-18-2005, 01:38 PM	#22
axelcat Adult Locals Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: West Coast Posts: 25,450

10-18-2005, 01:40 PM	#23
IwantU Bryan Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Costa Rica Posts: 1,764	Seen it before, really good one.... __________________ Bryan D ICQ: 293214625 !!!Coming Soon!!!

10-18-2005, 01:50 PM	#25
Matt Collins Confirmed User Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 1,060	This is very funny, but it is a close call either way :-) __________________ Check out Globally Translated!-Translate your sites and join the global economy! MattLaw -The law firm for webmasters and site owners! ICQ: 254-829-586 Who is this Matt guy? Check out the Ambush Interview

10-18-2005, 01:55 PM	#26
Semi-Retired-Dave Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: LA Posts: 11,190	That's funny. Good read. __________________ Support a Good Cause

10-18-2005, 02:05 PM	#27
Swappernet Registered User Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: On the front lines Posts: 43	Kind of reminds me of the old saying I heard somewhere not sure if I remember it correcly but chalk one more up for vagina: whats the worst thing about being a dick? 1. you have a swollen bald head with its own brain 2. you are being followed around by a pair of nuts 3. your next door neighbor is an asshole 4. your best friend is a vagina - so one more point for vagina __________________ ICQ: 254694894 www.swappernet.com - For our members it's a lifestyle! For our affiliates it's a lifetime!

10-18-2005, 02:06 PM	#28
Holly Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Jesusland Posts: 10,017	90% of this board has never seen a vagina in real life and isn't old enough to buy a beer. 1 pt to reality __________________ War National Damn Champions Eagle

10-18-2005, 02:59 PM	#31
nofx Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Virgin Mary's womb Posts: 16,826	i'll take beer any day __________________ Often times I wonder why There's love and hate, theres live or die. When sickness comes I must decide: When feelings go, theres suicide.

10-18-2005, 03:01 PM	#32
Holly Lez! She's back Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 3,480	I pick vagina over beer anyday! __________________ [email protected] Skype: hollyruprecht

10-18-2005, 10:18 PM	#33
reynold Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Global Traveler Posts: 51,271	Fuck, why choose if you can have both?

10-18-2005, 11:11 PM	#34
Vitasoy GFY HALL OF FAME DAMMIT!!! Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 58,202	those are great... can't deny beer nor pussy though __________________ [email protected]

10-18-2005, 11:20 PM	#35
nofx Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Virgin Mary's womb Posts: 16,826	yer sig is great __________________ Often times I wonder why There's love and hate, theres live or die. When sickness comes I must decide: When feelings go, theres suicide.

10-19-2005, 01:36 AM	#36
Th!nk Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 6,996	You made your point! It's funny, but i still choose vagina over beer, cause i always love the heavenly feeling the vagina can give me!

10-19-2005, 02:14 AM	#37
Mefo Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Amsterdam Posts: 6,169	I love your sig lol __________________

10-19-2005, 02:14 AM	#38
Mefo Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Amsterdam Posts: 6,169	oh btw also a cool post __________________

10-19-2005, 02:16 AM	#39
GeeDee Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Netherlands Posts: 261	A vagina gives me a good and warm feeling even if i have too much! But if I have too much beer thenthings go wrong and i get a totally different feeling __________________ Jobless! anyone hiring?