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Old 11-20-2004, 12:06 AM   #1
eddie-executive
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Ever get an attack off the diahhrea when your out somewhere?

Happened to me tonight and man did it suck Let's hear your story
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Old 11-20-2004, 12:07 AM   #2
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I didn't make it
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Old 11-20-2004, 12:07 AM   #3
eddie-executive
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I was having dinner with friends after work, and started to feel sick. I left early because I was really beginning to feel uncomfortable. I hailed
a cab. I thought I could make it home to NJ ok but I had a total "assplosion" in the cab on the way to the train station... I completely spackled myself, out of nowhere I just couldn't hold it any longer.

The cabdriver stopped the car and kicked me out of the cab mostly because of the stench. I saw a gap store open. I rushed in and purchaced a pair of boxers and a new pair of jeans. After they got a wiff of me in the store they wouldn't let me use their bathroom or changing rooms. I literallly ran out. I ran all the way to the train station. I make my train with seconds to spare.

Totally soiled, I find myself slanding alone in the vestibule between two cars. I open the sliding window before the stench builds up, I sieze the moment and remove my boxers and jeans in one quick movement and toss them out the window as the train begins to move. As quickly as I can I make a move to put on the new clothes. I reach into the gap bag to find two very girly ladies shirts...................(in my rush I grabbed the wrong bag)

As the blood rushed to my face I hear the door open in the adjacent vestibule..."all tickets please!" there I stood, naked from the waste down
& wafting... and my ticket was in my pants pocket.


the rest I leave to your imagination, but it was really somthing to
behold.
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Old 11-20-2004, 12:08 AM   #4
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Hold on, I will let ya know in a sec. Im having an attack right now.
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Old 11-20-2004, 12:09 AM   #5
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Yep it has happened to me several time.

My ex wife, suffers from IBS.

That poor girl would eat something and in 15 minutes she had to go.

I always felt so bad for her.
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Old 11-20-2004, 12:10 AM   #6
eddie-executive
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Last summer I was dating this Korean girl, and for her birthday I was invited over to her parents house for dinner. Her mother served this pickled cabbage, man I thought this shit was great and ate like a ton of it, which her entire family thought was hilarious. By the end of the meal there are some very bad things going on in my lower abdominal region, like there is some kind of world cup soccer match going on in my ass. Politely I ask to be excused from the table and am shown where the bathroom is, like right off the dinning room. This sucks, who in their freaking right mind would put a f--king bathroom right next to a f--king dinning room? So I'm sitting on the bowl, hearing her parents talking and plates and glassing clanking and I feel like I'm at the dinner table sitting on the shitter. And I know that in a few seconds a tidal wave of explosive shit will launch out of my ass. Well I can't hold it in any longer and I let go. Man it sounded like a brass band and the smell I'm sure you could smell this from anywhere in the house let alone right outside the door of the bathroom. As I'm finishing I can hear like arguing and yelling, and I get real paranoid that maybe I've done something offensive, that perhaps I should have held it in, or shit in my pants you know something more socialy acceptable. So I get so freaking nervous I jump out the window and leave. I never called that girl and she never called me again.
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Old 11-20-2004, 12:11 AM   #7
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i didnt believe someone about prune juice so i drank a bottle then went out for dinner...
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Old 11-20-2004, 12:17 AM   #8
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if you have no gallbladder, this happens alot. TRUST ME!
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Old 11-20-2004, 12:30 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally posted by mdcq
if you have no gallbladder, this happens alot. TRUST ME!
I know first hand it sucks bigtime. I wonder if they will ever have something for it?
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Old 11-20-2004, 12:31 AM   #10
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No, but I once attacked a diahhrea out somewhere
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Old 11-20-2004, 12:35 AM   #11
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Please stop using the name Eddie. You are soiling the name, Eddie.

More appropriate names would include, Tim-T-Troll or Trolls-R-Us. Eddie, however, is not appropriate for you.

Thank you.
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Old 11-20-2004, 12:37 AM   #12
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[QUOTE]Originally posted by eddie-executive
[B]I was having dinner with friends after work, and started to feel sick. I left early because I was really beginning to feel uncomfortable. I hailed
a cab. I thought I could make it home to NJ ok but I had a total "assplosion" in the cab on the way to the train station... I completely spackled myself, out of nowhere I just couldn't hold it any longer.

The cabdriver stopped the car and kicked me out of the cab mostly because of the stench. I saw a gap store open. I rushed in and purchaced a pair of boxers and a new pair of jeans. After they got a wiff of me in the store they wouldn't let me use their bathroom or changing rooms. I literallly ran out. I ran all the way to the train station. I make my train with seconds to spare.

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Old 11-20-2004, 12:40 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally posted by eddie-executive
Last summer I was dating this Korean girl, and for her birthday I was invited over to her parents house for dinner. Her mother served this pickled cabbage, man I thought this shit was great and ate like a ton of it, which her entire family thought was hilarious. By the end of the meal there are some very bad things going on in my lower abdominal region, like there is some kind of world cup soccer match going on in my ass. Politely I ask to be excused from the table and am shown where the bathroom is, like right off the dinning room. This sucks, who in their freaking right mind would put a f--king bathroom right next to a f--king dinning room? So I'm sitting on the bowl, hearing her parents talking and plates and glassing clanking and I feel like I'm at the dinner table sitting on the shitter. And I know that in a few seconds a tidal wave of explosive shit will launch out of my ass. Well I can't hold it in any longer and I let go. Man it sounded like a brass band and the smell I'm sure you could smell this from anywhere in the house let alone right outside the door of the bathroom. As I'm finishing I can hear like arguing and yelling, and I get real paranoid that maybe I've done something offensive, that perhaps I should have held it in, or shit in my pants you know something more socialy acceptable. So I get so freaking nervous I jump out the window and leave. I never called that girl and she never called me again.
Please tell me you're making up these stories, because this is hilarious if it's true.
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Old 11-20-2004, 12:46 AM   #14
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one time 10 years ago I was out jogging a few hours after eating tacos for lunch. bad idea.

I was along a big 6 lane street and there were neighborhoods around but I did not think anyone would let me in their house and I figured I had about 30 seconds max anyway before I lost it.....so I found some bushes along the sidewalk and tried to get behind them as best as I could, pulled down my running shorts and laid out some nice long orange mostly liquid turds.

I know at least 2 or 3 cars had to see me but I did not care. If I had gone in my shorts that shit would be running down my leg big time. After sqeezing out the last of it, I pulled my pants up and jogged for another 10 minutes before finding a gas station and using their bathroom to get cleaned up a bit... it was a bad day but it could have been a lot worse lol
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Old 11-20-2004, 12:50 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally posted by eddie-executive
Last summer I was dating this Korean girl, and for her birthday I was invited over to her parents house for dinner. Her mother served this pickled cabbage, man I thought this shit was great and ate like a ton of it, which her entire family thought was hilarious. By the end of the meal there are some very bad things going on in my lower abdominal region, like there is some kind of world cup soccer match going on in my ass. Politely I ask to be excused from the table and am shown where the bathroom is, like right off the dinning room. This sucks, who in their freaking right mind would put a f--king bathroom right next to a f--king dinning room? So I'm sitting on the bowl, hearing her parents talking and plates and glassing clanking and I feel like I'm at the dinner table sitting on the shitter. And I know that in a few seconds a tidal wave of explosive shit will launch out of my ass. Well I can't hold it in any longer and I let go. Man it sounded like a brass band and the smell I'm sure you could smell this from anywhere in the house let alone right outside the door of the bathroom. As I'm finishing I can hear like arguing and yelling, and I get real paranoid that maybe I've done something offensive, that perhaps I should have held it in, or shit in my pants you know something more socialy acceptable. So I get so freaking nervous I jump out the window and leave. I never called that girl and she never called me again.
Any more stories? That was hilarious!
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Old 11-20-2004, 12:52 AM   #16
eddie-executive
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Quote:
Originally posted by Repetitive Monkey
Any more stories? That was hilarious!

Yea hold on i have more
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Old 11-20-2004, 12:58 AM   #17
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This experience I gotta share. It was a long day of work, and all I could think about was getting out for something to eat (other than the 2 bowls of chili i had at work). Once me and a few friends got to our local hang out, something wasn't sitting right in my guts. My ass screamed for help, and I answered the call. Like an Olympic runner I dashed out of the booth to the bathroom. All I could think about was getting to the toilet in time. I ran toward the stall, turned around before I even opened the door, sat down and let it go. Shit flew out of me faster than greased lightning. It splattered out, hitting the walls and running over the floor. The feeling of relief surged over me, but then to my dismay I realized something... the seat of the toilet wasn't cold... but warm, and soft. I turned to see a man, sitting, TRYING to take a peaceful dump, but I had changed all that. As soon as I turned, the man screamed and pushed me off while I was still shitting. The stream came blowing out of my ass and covered the walls of the stall. After slipping on the already wet floor, I fell onto the sink outside, but managed to spray a near bystander who was washing his hands!. In nearly 20 seconds I managed to cover almost the entire bathroom in a disgusting film of fecal matter. My clothes, hands, and arms were covered in shit. I was never so humiliated in my life.
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Old 11-20-2004, 07:31 AM   #18
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I once crapped my pants in school when I was about 14. One of those farts that ended up being juicy. Luckily, I was wearing black pants. Since my parents were at work and I couldn't possibly take the bus smelling like I did, I walked home -- a good 75 minutes away on foot -- in the middle of a cold Canadian winter (-20 or so). Wonderful memories.
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Old 11-20-2004, 07:44 AM   #19
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I am learning so much from this thread.. LOL
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