Now accepting applications... - GoFuckYourself.com

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:10 AM

this is a time limited position, however, the chosen one will be first in line for future consideration.

I'm looking for a personal assistant for the Vegas show.

Duties include, (but may not be limited to):

Scheduling. To include dinners, events, appearances, shows, parites, etc...

Conferences: Not so much pre-planned conferences, but more the one-on-one type stuff.

Meals: Make it happen. I don't wanna have to think about it.

Shows: Whatever I want. Find the damn tickets and make it happen. I'm far too busy to deal with it. Excuses....? Leave them at home. Can't handle it? Don't apply.

Personal Assistance: Keep the cretins at bay. If the people want autographs and handshakes and shit, fine... but make it orderly and control it so I don't get overwhelmed. Don't EVER let them touch the hair.

Perks: My assistant will accompany me everywhere I go, be privy to my personal conversations, have an in-depth look into a section of the "life of AMp", be considered for future operations, and have full attendance wherever I go.

This is open for the next two days ONLY.

JDog · 12-30-2003, 03:11 AM

I would love to help you out, except I would then need a asistant for all my plans.

jDoG

pamphage · 12-30-2003, 03:13 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Amputate Your Head
this is a time limited position, however, the chosen one will be first in line for future consideration.

I'm looking for a personal assistant for the Vegas show.

Duties include, (but may not be limited to):

Scheduling. To include dinners, events, appearances, shows, parites, etc...

Conferences: Not so much pre-planned conferences, but more the one-on-one type stuff.

Meals: Make it happen. I don't wanna have to think about it.

Shows: Whatever I want. Find the damn tickets and make it happen. I'm far too busy to deal with it. Excuses....? Leave them at home. Can't handle it? Don't apply.

Personal Assistance: Keep the cretins at bay. If the people want autographs and handshakes and shit, fine... but make it orderly and control it so I don't get overwhelmed. Don't EVER let them touch the hair.

Perks: My assistant will accompany me everywhere I go, be privy to my personal conversations, have an in-depth look into a section of the "life of AMp", be considered for future operations, and have full attendance wherever I go.

This is open for the next two days ONLY.

jesus. you are a bigger primadonna than aria

kmanrox · 12-30-2003, 03:14 AM

hahaha did you mistake yourself for someone 'important'?

what part of your paycheck *don't* you understand?

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:14 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by kmanrox
hahaha did you mistake yourself for someone 'important'?

what part of your paycheck *don't* you understand?

your application has been denied.

DarkJedi · 12-30-2003, 03:14 AM

You and SleazyDream would get along good together

[Brian] · 12-30-2003, 03:15 AM

that's gotta be a joke, hehe

it's a damn tradeshow, not that hard to keep track of where to go and when

Digipimp · 12-30-2003, 03:15 AM

Are designers so big they need personal assistants? It's not like you're a superstar or something, you'd be better off hiring someone to keep you out of fights than handle all that bullshit. I mean how are you too busy to take care of the things you're going there for in the first place? But hell go for it actually get a female assistant.

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:17 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Digipimp
Are designers so big they need personal assistants? It's not like you're a superstar or something, you'd be better off hiring someone to keep you out of fights than handle all that bullshit. I mean how are you too busy to take care of the things you're going there for in the first place? But hell go for it actually get a female assistant.

sarcasm is not needed here.... I'm looking for genuine applicants tonight.

klik · 12-30-2003, 03:18 AM

i thought this thread was about GL4L...

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:18 AM

my regular personal assistant is on vacation the first week of January, otherwise I would fly her in along with me....

that's why I'm looking for an opportunist. Someone that wants a shot.

[Brian] · 12-30-2003, 03:18 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Amputate Your Head

sarcasm is not needed here.... I'm looking for genuine applicants tonight.

you had to know you'd catch some flak for this thread though

DarkJedi · 12-30-2003, 03:19 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by [Brian]
that's gotta be a joke, hehe

you think ?

Digipimp · 12-30-2003, 03:19 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Amputate Your Head

sarcasm is not needed here.... I'm looking for genuine applicants tonight.

Good luck man, I bet you can find a cute female to handle your biz for a day or two. I have a personal assistant I call it a Palm Pilot.

pamphage · 12-30-2003, 03:19 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Amputate Your Head

sarcasm is not needed here.... I'm looking for genuine applicants tonight.

how much are you offering for this job from hell?

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:19 AM

yes, this is a serious thread.

JDog · 12-30-2003, 03:19 AM

How much are you paying? But that would mean I would have to represent you! Sorry gotta represent new sensations!

jDoG

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:22 AM

no one wants a shot?

hmmm.... ok. Well, I guess I pull some looker off the street then. Thought I'd offer it up to GFY first, but apparently no one is interested.

JDog · 12-30-2003, 03:23 AM

Maybe if you posted, how much you were going to pay them, they would reply!

jDoG

Jewbacca · 12-30-2003, 03:24 AM

LMAO, does anyone honestly think AMP could afford a personal assistant ? Even for a couple of days ? :orglaugh

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:25 AM

how's this....

tell ME what you think you're worth. And why. If I believe you, you got a job.

oh, also... I forgot.... limo duty. I don't wanna have to chase down that shit. So make sure it's set up to pick me up whenever for whatever.

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:27 AM

this is not a joke people....

if you're interested, I suggest you post, or contact me some other way.

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:29 AM

ooo... I forgot the most important thing!

you gotta watch my shit. My jacket, my camera, that kinda shit.... because if it turns up missing, it's your ass.

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:31 AM

also, I expect nothing less than 200% loyalty.

JDog · 12-30-2003, 03:31 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Amputate Your Head
ooo... I forgot the most important thing!

you gotta watch my shit. My jacket, my camera, that kinda shit.... because if it turns up missing, it's your ass.

Ah shit, that sucks for the person, that means they gotta be mostly sober at parties!

jDoG

sexeducation · 12-30-2003, 03:31 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Amputate Your Head
my regular personal assistant is on vacation the first week of January, otherwise I would fly her in along with me....

that's why I'm looking for an opportunist. Someone that wants a shot.

I'll do it.
Fly me in. ; )

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:32 AM

seriously... this is NOT a bs joke thread.... I mean it here.

if someone wants a job.... a ticket into some hot parties.... accompany me whever I go... AND get paid...

this is a REAL job.

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:33 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by sexeducation

I'll do it.
Fly me in. ; )

fuck off.

application DENIED.

Trax · 12-30-2003, 03:33 AM

never ever
NEVER EVER
please reject me

sexeducation · 12-30-2003, 03:33 AM

so do I.

sexeducation · 12-30-2003, 03:34 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Amputate Your Head

fuck off.

application DENIED.

roflmao

Jewbacca · 12-30-2003, 03:35 AM

AMP forgot to take his Ritalin today.

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:37 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Jewbacca
AMP forgot to take his Ritalin today.

but then, you aren't AMp, you're not here, never been here, never will be here, and pretty much speaking straight out your uneducated ass.... and thus: take your eleven posts, and jam it in your ass fucknut....

because you mean exactly = fuckall.

sexeducation · 12-30-2003, 03:38 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Jewbacca
AMP forgot to take his Ritalin today.

no maybe he did take his Ritalin - but too much. : )

Meloman · 12-30-2003, 03:39 AM

Dude if I had a personal assistant I would just mess with them too much while I was drunk, lol.... stuff like "Stand on one leg and hop around", lol....

They would quite within 5 minutes, lol.

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:40 AM

so no one wants the job huh....

too bad. I guess I get a local hottie to come with me for peanuts and a plane ticket instead.

btw, job pay is $1k....

for 5 days. Along with everything else I've already mentioned.

Digipimp · 12-30-2003, 03:41 AM

I'll do it for three paysite designs.

sexeducation · 12-30-2003, 03:42 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Amputate Your Head
so no one wants the job huh....

too bad. I guess I get a local hottie to come with me for peanuts and a plane ticket instead.

btw, job pay is $1k....

for 5 days. Along with everything else I've already mentioned.

I'll take that.
lol

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:43 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Digipimp
I'll do it for three paysite designs.

3 paysite tours will run you $10k.... you plan on writing me a check for the difference?

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:43 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by sexeducation

I'll take that.
lol

chump.... go beat off in the bathroom again punk.

pamphage · 12-30-2003, 03:44 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Meloman
Dude if I had a personal assistant I would just mess with them too much while I was drunk, lol.... stuff like "Stand on one leg and hop around", lol....

They would quite within 5 minutes, lol.

haha

media · 12-30-2003, 03:45 AM

Dude, honestly.. Your demanding alot from someone that will most likely end up stuck at a blackjack table or getting distracted by some ass..

I would not trust anyone from this board with your itinerary.. I started planning my itinerary 2 weeks ago, its maticulous.. I know when and where shits happening, and I have all my own invites and passes to shit I wanna do...

Media..

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:47 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by media
Dude, honestly.. Your demanding alot from someone that will most likely end up stuck at a blackjack table or getting distracted by some ass..

I would not trust anyone from this board with your itinerary.. I started planning my itinerary 2 weeks ago, its maticulous.. I know when and where shits happening, and I have all my own invites and passes to shit I wanna do...

Media..

I know man.... but it's too much to think about... I hate thinking about all that shit. I just want someone to handle it.

Digipimp · 12-30-2003, 03:47 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Amputate Your Head

3 paysite tours will run you $10k.... you plan on writing me a check for the difference?

Ahh I didn't know you were so expensive even though I knew you were on the high side. Well try bumping your thread in about 6 hours and you should get more of a response then bro.

katsuki · 12-30-2003, 03:48 AM

fly me from australia and back again!?

TTiger · 12-30-2003, 03:49 AM

if i was from US and had more confident in my english speaking ill apply:-) but some people (girls) like french canadian accent:-))
im a pretty good PR guy i like to meet people i like to origanize event etc..since im working as dj in night club (stripper club) so im kinda used to meet people booking scheduling girls and stuff..

TTiger

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:51 AM

so nobody going to vages wants to make an extra k?

12-30-2003, 03:52 AM

In case you need an experienced fluffer, you know where to find me.

Amputate Your Head · 12-30-2003, 03:52 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Equinox
In case you need an experienced fluffer, you know where to find me.

I wouldn't hire you to lick my fucking boots.

Digipimp · 12-30-2003, 03:53 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Amputate Your Head
so nobody going to vages wants to make an extra k?

Rent me a Lincoln Town Car to drive from Dallas to Vegas and pay for my hookers while I'm there and we're set.

12-30-2003, 03:10 AM	#1
Amputate Your Head There can be only one Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Somewhere else Posts: 39,075	Now accepting applications... this is a time limited position, however, the chosen one will be first in line for future consideration. I'm looking for a personal assistant for the Vegas show. Duties include, (but may not be limited to): Scheduling. To include dinners, events, appearances, shows, parites, etc... Conferences: Not so much pre-planned conferences, but more the one-on-one type stuff. Meals: Make it happen. I don't wanna have to think about it. Shows: Whatever I want. Find the damn tickets and make it happen. I'm far too busy to deal with it. Excuses....? Leave them at home. Can't handle it? Don't apply. Personal Assistance: Keep the cretins at bay. If the people want autographs and handshakes and shit, fine... but make it orderly and control it so I don't get overwhelmed. Don't EVER let them touch the hair. Perks: My assistant will accompany me everywhere I go, be privy to my personal conversations, have an in-depth look into a section of the "life of AMp", be considered for future operations, and have full attendance wherever I go. This is open for the next two days ONLY. __________________ SIG TOO BIG

12-30-2003, 03:11 AM	#2
JDog Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Canby, OR Posts: 7,453	I would love to help you out, except I would then need a asistant for all my plans. jDoG __________________ NSCash now powering ReelProfits.com ALSO FEATURING: NSCash.com :: SoloDollars.com :: ReelProfits.com :: BiminiBucks.com :: VOD PROGRAMS COMING SOON: Greedy Bucks :: Vengeance Cash NOW OFFERING OVER 60 SITES CONTACT :: JAMES SMITH :: CHIEF TECHNOLOGY OFFICER :: ICQ (711385133)

12-30-2003, 03:14 AM	#4
kmanrox aka K-Man Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: The Gutter Posts: 29,292	hahaha did you mistake yourself for someone 'important'? what part of your paycheck don't you understand? __________________ Crypto HODLr Crypto mining Angel investor

12-30-2003, 03:15 AM	#7
[Brian] Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Orange County, CA Posts: 1,523	that's gotta be a joke, hehe it's a damn tradeshow, not that hard to keep track of where to go and when __________________ HerbalRevenue - Exciting new enhancement program ICQ: 391113064

12-30-2003, 03:15 AM	#8
Digipimp BP4L OT DL Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: BP4L Swap Meet Posts: 13,481	Are designers so big they need personal assistants? It's not like you're a superstar or something, you'd be better off hiring someone to keep you out of fights than handle all that bullshit. I mean how are you too busy to take care of the things you're going there for in the first place? But hell go for it actually get a female assistant. __________________ Still Hosting at Webair and You Should Be Too

12-30-2003, 03:14 AM	#6
DarkJedi No Refunds Issued. Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: GFY Posts: 28,300	You and SleazyDream would get along good together

12-30-2003, 03:18 AM	#10
klik Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: san diego Posts: 5,092	i thought this thread was about GL4L...

12-30-2003, 03:19 AM	#16
Amputate Your Head There can be only one Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Somewhere else Posts: 39,075	yes, this is a serious thread. __________________ SIG TOO BIG

12-30-2003, 03:22 AM	#18
Amputate Your Head There can be only one Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Somewhere else Posts: 39,075	no one wants a shot? hmmm.... ok. Well, I guess I pull some looker off the street then. Thought I'd offer it up to GFY first, but apparently no one is interested. __________________ SIG TOO BIG

12-30-2003, 03:23 AM	#19
JDog Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Canby, OR Posts: 7,453	Maybe if you posted, how much you were going to pay them, they would reply! jDoG __________________ NSCash now powering ReelProfits.com ALSO FEATURING: NSCash.com :: SoloDollars.com :: ReelProfits.com :: BiminiBucks.com :: VOD PROGRAMS COMING SOON: Greedy Bucks :: Vengeance Cash NOW OFFERING OVER 60 SITES CONTACT :: JAMES SMITH :: CHIEF TECHNOLOGY OFFICER :: ICQ (711385133)

12-30-2003, 03:24 AM	#20
Jewbacca So Fucking Banned Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 21	LMAO, does anyone honestly think AMP could afford a personal assistant ? Even for a couple of days ? :orglaugh

12-30-2003, 03:25 AM	#21
Amputate Your Head There can be only one Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Somewhere else Posts: 39,075	how's this.... tell ME what you think you're worth. And why. If I believe you, you got a job. oh, also... I forgot.... limo duty. I don't wanna have to chase down that shit. So make sure it's set up to pick me up whenever for whatever. __________________ SIG TOO BIG

12-30-2003, 03:27 AM	#22
Amputate Your Head There can be only one Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Somewhere else Posts: 39,075	this is not a joke people.... if you're interested, I suggest you post, or contact me some other way. __________________ SIG TOO BIG

12-30-2003, 03:29 AM	#23
Amputate Your Head There can be only one Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Somewhere else Posts: 39,075	ooo... I forgot the most important thing! you gotta watch my shit. My jacket, my camera, that kinda shit.... because if it turns up missing, it's your ass. __________________ SIG TOO BIG

12-30-2003, 03:31 AM	#24
Amputate Your Head There can be only one Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Somewhere else Posts: 39,075	also, I expect nothing less than 200% loyalty. __________________ SIG TOO BIG

12-30-2003, 03:32 AM	#27
Amputate Your Head There can be only one Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Somewhere else Posts: 39,075	seriously... this is NOT a bs joke thread.... I mean it here. if someone wants a job.... a ticket into some hot parties.... accompany me whever I go... AND get paid... this is a REAL job. __________________ SIG TOO BIG

12-30-2003, 03:33 AM	#29
Trax [----------------------] Join Date: Aug 2001 Posts: 14,486	never ever NEVER EVER please reject me

12-30-2003, 03:33 AM	#30
sexeducation So Fucking Banned Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Calgary - Alberta - Canada Posts: 7,315	so do I.

12-30-2003, 03:35 AM	#32
Jewbacca So Fucking Banned Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 21	AMP forgot to take his Ritalin today.

12-30-2003, 03:39 AM	#35
Meloman Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Sacramento,CA Posts: 1,540	Dude if I had a personal assistant I would just mess with them too much while I was drunk, lol.... stuff like "Stand on one leg and hop around", lol.... They would quite within 5 minutes, lol.

12-30-2003, 03:40 AM	#36
Amputate Your Head There can be only one Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Somewhere else Posts: 39,075	so no one wants the job huh.... too bad. I guess I get a local hottie to come with me for peanuts and a plane ticket instead. btw, job pay is $1k.... for 5 days. Along with everything else I've already mentioned. __________________ SIG TOO BIG

12-30-2003, 03:41 AM	#37
Digipimp BP4L OT DL Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: BP4L Swap Meet Posts: 13,481	I'll do it for three paysite designs. __________________ Still Hosting at Webair and You Should Be Too

12-30-2003, 03:45 AM	#42
media Confirmed Moneymaker Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Eugene, OR It's Like Jail, Only with Trees! Posts: 9,852	Dude, honestly.. Your demanding alot from someone that will most likely end up stuck at a blackjack table or getting distracted by some ass.. I would not trust anyone from this board with your itinerary.. I started planning my itinerary 2 weeks ago, its maticulous.. I know when and where shits happening, and I have all my own invites and passes to shit I wanna do... Media.. __________________ I'm here for the violence!

12-30-2003, 03:48 AM	#45
katsuki Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 134	fly me from australia and back again!?

12-30-2003, 03:49 AM	#46
TTiger Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: quebec, canada Posts: 3,030	if i was from US and had more confident in my english speaking ill apply:-) but some people (girls) like french canadian accent:-)) im a pretty good PR guy i like to meet people i like to origanize event etc..since im working as dj in night club (stripper club) so im kinda used to meet people booking scheduling girls and stuff.. TTiger __________________

12-30-2003, 03:51 AM	#47
Amputate Your Head There can be only one Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Somewhere else Posts: 39,075	so nobody going to vages wants to make an extra k? __________________ SIG TOO BIG

12-30-2003, 03:52 AM	#48
X37375787 Guest Posts: n/a	In case you need an experienced fluffer, you know where to find me.