The Two Towers is Homo Slang For Erect Hobbit Penises

[xroach]

i love fundamentalists

http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news1202/twotowers.html

[Fletch XXX]

<font size="1">'Pastors who were allowed to see the first film, The Fellowship of the Ring, remember that toward the end, one of the male hobbits (which is slang for "homo boy with a little bitty [insert unchristian word here] hanging between his legs") fell so much in love with the main character, Frodo (another male hobbit), that he committed the ultimate homosexual sacrifice by ruining his hairdo and nearly drowning himself to prove his loyalty. Although sodomy is now suggested in nearly every scene where the two creatures appear together, thankfully, the producers leave the disgusting homosexuality (which was so much a part of the novels) off camera. There are some scenes where the hobbits appear together in one sleeping bag and a lewd discussion about what sinful act led to both their palms and feet becoming so hairy, but that's about it. ?By moving dozens of deviant sex scenes between those hairy little perverts off screen, the producers were able to achieve a PG13 rating," says Pastor Deacon Fred. "And make no mistake, my dear friends; here at Landover Baptist, PG means 'pretty gay.'</font>



hahahah

[Beastiepoo]

Thats a pretty good parody site. The scary thing is that you ALMOST have to look twice to be able to tell.

[xroach]

Originally posted by Beastiepoo
Thats a pretty good parody site. The scary thing is that you ALMOST have to look twice to be able to tell.

yeah right, next your gonna tell me theonion.com is bullshit too

[Beastiepoo]

Um, NO - last I knew theonion was not a parody site. Unlike the one you've posted a link to.

The following is copied directly from http://www.landoverbaptist.org/beliefs.html

Visiting Landover Baptist

You will want to make your reservations 2 years in advance for any service where head Pastor, Deacon Fred is preaching. (We are booked solid) Cost is $50.00 per person. Other services and guided tours can be arranged by calling the Landover Information line at: 1-900-976-7867. Reservations for church attendance and payments to hear the gospel of Christ can be arranged through a Christian extension of Priceline.com ticket sales (keyword: priceline.com - landover baptist church ticket sales)

this parody is copyright 1996-2001 Americhrist Ltd. All rights reserved.

American christians can get pretty insane but even YOU have to admit that this site takes it just that bit too far for reality.

[Beastiepoo]

Um, NO - last I knew theonion was not a parody site, it was a comedy site. Unlike the one you've posted a link to (although the site is pretty damn funny if you were brought up in a strict christian church like I was, and turned out as twisted as I did).

The following is copied directly from http://www.landoverbaptist.org/beliefs.html

Visiting Landover Baptist

You will want to make your reservations 2 years in advance for any service where head Pastor, Deacon Fred is preaching. (We are booked solid) Cost is $50.00 per person. Other services and guided tours can be arranged by calling the Landover Information line at: 1-900-976-7867. Reservations for church attendance and payments to hear the gospel of Christ can be arranged through a Christian extension of Priceline.com ticket sales (keyword: priceline.com - landover baptist church ticket sales)

this parody is copyright 1996-2001 Americhrist Ltd. All rights reserved.

American christians can get pretty insane but even YOU have to admit that this site takes it just that bit too far for reality.

[xroach]

you win, i'm too confused to reply

[tygergoddess]

You think Landover Baptist is funny?

Check out Full Gospel Ranch.

I love that site=) I love Discordians in general, guess I like to stir shit occasionally too. If I had my druthers, I would be making those kind of parody sites, not porn. I love to make Fundies look silly=)