Dear Eric:

[alias]

Can I do an educational series on how to survive gfy trolling?

[baddog]

[alias]

I'm dead serious. Please fuck with me in this thread.

[MetaMan]

maybe teach us how to make it through life being so ugly?

[alias]

Originally Posted by MetaMan

maybe teach us how to make it through life being so ugly?

1. You are going to want to go ahead and donate all your mirrors to charity.

2. Learn how to exploit the insecurities of attractive females. Always remember: you may be hideous but all girls [at some point in their lives] feel that not only are they are ugly but worthless too.

[xenigo]

Originally Posted by alias

2. Learn how to exploit the insecurities of attractive females. Always remember: you may be hideous but all girls [at some point in their lives] feel that not only are they are ugly but worthless too.

You stole my playbook... I want it back.

[Redmanthatcould]

Originally Posted by MetaMan

maybe teach us how to make it through life being so ugly?

Did you draw your avatar?

[alias]

Originally Posted by VS_Jeff

Did you draw your avatar?

Yes Jeff: Background image is from zbrush, flower is Adobe Illustrator.

[MetaMan]

Originally Posted by VS_Jeff

Did you draw your avatar?

nah downloaded it.

but i should just say i did it.

[alias]

Metaman, do you need ach processing or just cc. I might be able to help with ach.

[MetaMan]

Originally Posted by alias

Metaman, do you need ach processing or just cc. I might be able to help with ach.

CC still havent found a solution.

got a couple leads but nothing tied down yet. it seems things have hit the fan with processors.

[alias]

Originally Posted by MetaMan

CC still havent found a solution.

got a couple leads but nothing tied down yet. it seems things have hit the fan with processors.

If you have volume, get creative. Plenty of merchants need to be invested in, these same people already have or can get merchant accounts and 24 hour settlement via their local "real" bank.

If they skip with the money the sales you send stop. Basically a 24 hour risk window, especially if [assuming they are Canadian] you have them Interac transfer the $ to your CAD bank daily for the dollar fifty.

[MetaMan]

Originally Posted by alias

If you have volume, get creative. Plenty of merchants need to be invested in, these same people already have or can get merchant accounts and 24 hour settlement via their local "real" bank.

If they skip with the money the sales you send stop. Basically a 24 hour risk window, especially if [assuming they are Canadian] you have them Interac transfer the $ to your CAD bank daily for the dollar fifty.

We have volume. We just need someone who understands risk. This if needed involves spreading charge backs across accounts. We want a solution. I am tired of talk talk talk talk talk, it is a waste of my time.

after all this Acai shit merchants have basically closed up. you need an arm and a leg to even get setup it seems. And admittedly my personal credit is not amazing. but we are legit and willing to work with someone. the numbers are to high for exceptions not to be made.

we are not going to jump through hoops. it is to much of a headache. most people we talk to give us a candid response. i want ANSWERS not to be SOLD, it is like no one gets that part. you would think a processing company would want to do PROCESSING and not continually try to sell you for no reason.

i am telling you no one has ANSWERS, always "have to check with this department" "have to talk to that department" over and over. is there not one guy at these companies who knows the system in and out? it is INSANE to me. why am i going to put millions of dollars with a company whos employees dont know the first thing about processing? we got screwd once and it is not happening again.

Years ago people would jump all over this. Now it is like companies are afraid of any risk. How can you operate a business model and not take any risks? i do not get it. im not an expert in processing yet i know basically the same amount as everyone i talk to, how can this be?

it is like the new modo is dont want to give a bad answer so dont bother answering at all.

[alias]

Put an ad on CL looking for business partners, offer them a small % cut.

[MetaMan]

i am not taking that kind of risk, it is to much money to just post ads. this is not peanuts. i want an established company who understands mid to high risk management. it isnt all that hard. but if no one is processing mid to high level risk then we are fucked anyway.

we have a backup business model we will use if it turns out to be to big of a headache. these past few days have been complete hell. no one has any answers EVER.

you come to me asking for a design i dont go off about how photoshop works. this is the exact thing we have been through.

[alias]

Where do you want to settle? US bank?

[MetaMan]

Originally Posted by alias

Where do you want to settle? US bank?

the company itself is in USA. but fuck ill move to dam Philippines if i have to. ill do processing on the moon. i dont care. i just want a SOLUTION.

we do not care! anywhere! you would think the processors would have this answer! what countries to setup shop in. what countries to have what accounts in.

imo it is enough money where a company can go out of their way and set us up with a plan to manage the account properly.

we want to play by their rules. we want to be setup under their rules. we want them to give us info. isnt that what they are there for?

it is like no one understands the process themselves but they are in the business of processing. absolutely insane.

we have not given up yet. there is a few people on our list left that we are in talks with. but it is starting to feel like a bigger headache then it is worth. our backup plan my only net say 60% of the total but if involves less headaches for me and me sleeping well at night KNOWING i will get paid then it is worth it.

[alias]

Meta: Icq or email contact info please? I won't hit you up unless I have something at least semi-solid lined up.

BTW & FWIW I have the same flake issues with lots of coders, hackers and the like.

[MetaMan]

our last merchant:

"is there any limits?"
"no there is not any limits"

"do we need to manage chargeb ack ratio or will you help us manage it?"
"we will manage it for you and let you know the continued status of the account"

then we push volume and all of a sudden
"the limit on the account was $5k/month and your rep no longer works with us"

what company only does $5k processing? fucking insane!

now they are holding $xx,xxx mid range. it is INSANE! they were known to process high risk and me thinks they got assfucked and are trying to make it up by scrounging newer accounts.

they are always "calling us back" "it is in risk management" constant bullshit. i am not going through this again.


what did you mean about coders flaking? i didnt catch that.

[MetaMan]

email ginux hotmail.com

[alias]

Coders. I refer a guy get him sent some $ for a project, 2 weeks later nothing. Someone in the past who has delivered for me just bails on a project he has said no problem to complete. Now I have to play private DICK and get buddy's info, get my other contact refunded etc.

Flakes.

You can email me your contact info, Friday night is a bit slow. I am looking into a solution for you. [email protected]

Edit: Contact info saved.

[MetaMan]

typical convo:

"o we process so and so"
why the fuck do i care? what does have to do with me

"i suggest processing in europe"
ok great europe big country. how do we get setup and where.

"o ya we handle high volume"
tells them the amount
"o sorry we dont handle that kind of high volume"

gives them website info and asks if we need to change setup to go along with their guidelines
"o im going to have to check with risk management"
well why the fuck am i talking to you then?

"please write us up a business plan"
who are you to tell me to write a business plan? we want to process not apply for a loan. look at our site, see what business it is. there is the only business that matters.

"o we dont do that volume here is a referral" xrepeat
how do you not do volume you are a PROCESSOR, are people not in business of making money anymore? hey lets all wait out this "economic collapse" we are losing money faster then ever but hey lets not take risks and just slowly die.

no one knows anything, nothing about what reserves are needed NOTHING. wtf has happened? why would i put millions of dollars into a company who doesnt even understand the business they operate in? insane.

[alias]

Originally Posted by MetaMan

typical convo:
"i suggest processing in europe"
ok great europe big country. how do we get setup and where.

Points noted but that ^ is pure comedy.

[Fag]

Sounds like you are pushing some shady scam if you need HIGH risk management with chargebacks spread across several accounts and no one wants to process you.

BTW, how did you go all of the sudden from doing $200 designs to $100k/day in sales?

[MetaMan]

Originally Posted by Fag

Sounds like you are pushing some shady scam if you need HIGH risk management with chargebacks spread across several accounts and no one wants to process you.

BTW, how did you go all of the sudden from doing $200 designs to $100k/day in sales?

excuse me but i dont do $200 designs. and if you asked my clients you would understand why im not just a regular "designer". and maybe have some respect for people even if they are only earning $200 a day they are at least trying to make a career. which is better than hating on a message board dont you think?

im not an overnight success. i have been working for 10 years. i have helped run big sites before. i just never had the full capital to back it. im not rich yet by any means. hell right now i feel like i am assfucked.

i teamed up with a longtime friend of mine who already runs an established network. so he has been my push over the top.

and it is not shady. you obviously do not understand the amount of new regulations that visa and mastercard have put in place. new accounts are not easy to come by now. they are asking for long standing history. where if we are new to processing how can we have a long standing history?

im not saying i need it spread out over accounts i am saying someone who UNDERSTANDS what processing is. and what it takes to keep an account going and willing to work with us to do so.

this isnt 1999 customers can phone in for just about ANYTHING and charge ANYTHING back. i dont care if you are a mom and pap store you need someone who understands risk management when you are pushing volume. no ifs ands or buts.

[96ukssob]

id like to know more about this topic

[alias]

Fake nick is fake.

[MetaMan]

Originally Posted by bossku69

id like to know more about this topic

me to but it seems you have to be friends with the CEO of Visa to get answers. i think these new regulations on negative option sales has left processors scrambling. they cannot give answers on managing risk because it is so new. we are not even doing rebill. i just think they are so busy trying to clean their network and forecast future financials with all the changes they are less willing to take risks at this point in time.

alot of people have been helpful. but you can understand my frustration when you get lack of answers.

you may have been talking about the thread lol. but i seen you post in the other thread about processing so i just assumed. if you meant the thread ignore my post hehe.

[Fag]

$100k per day = $36,500,000 / year

Either you are trolling again or you seriously need a reality check.

[MetaMan]

Originally Posted by Fag

$100k per day = $36,500,000 / year

Either you are trolling again or you seriously need a reality check.

wow you do complex math to? i know lots of money eh? more then you will ever dream or have hope of making your entire life.

[Fag]

Originally Posted by MetaMan

wow you do complex math too? i know lots of money eh? more than you will ever dream or have hope of making in your entire life.

Wow, you've managed to make 3 grammatical errors in one line of text. I'd hang on to that day job if I were you.

[Cyber Fucker]

bwahahahahah

[MetaMan]

Originally Posted by Fag

Wow, you've managed to make 3 grammatical errors in one line of text. I'd hang on to that day job if I were you.

blah blah blah