How to properly cover a minor earthquake in Los Angeles. - GoFuckYourself.com

Cory W · 01-08-2009, 10:37 PM

First and foremost, its important that you put a big graphic up that reads EARTHQUAKE BREAKING NEWS COVERAGE. Surrounding this verbiage with broken bricks is usually spot on.

Next, you send out a chopper to fly over the area that felt the 3 seconds of shaking. This is ubber important that you have someone in the sky filming people carrying groceries to their cars while he talks about how their was just an earthquake.

After this, you request that people send in pictures of minor damage, which is basically picture frames laying on the floor.

Then, you ask the old guy at the Earthquake News Conference if this is a precursor to a larger event, at least 30 times. If you are good, you reword the question several times, but make sure you keep using the word "event" in place of "quake." You also need to ask him what kind of quake it is and if its an aftershock of the '94 quake, which is located roughly 57 miles northwest of the recent quake and 10 fault lines over.

Once you figure out that no one is dying in a collapsed toolshed, you start talking to building experts and they will tell you that all the buildings in LA can withstand a 4.5 quake. Act amazed.

Make sure that you keep that seismograph thingy going at all times, even in a pip screen in the corner.

Give out the red cross number, remind people to donate blood.

When all else fails, warn people that they should expect aftershocks. If any aftershocks are reported, try to make them out like they are new "events." Then repeat everything.

After all is done, make sure your segway to the weather girl is a question about her opinion on the quake, because, as we all know, she's a fucking earthquake expert.

Iron Fist · 01-08-2009, 10:39 PM

Drama = Ratings

seeric · 01-08-2009, 10:40 PM

Ok, who are you?

What are you doing in Cory's nick?

UBBER?

THEIR - THERE - THEY'RE grammar mistakes

Blasphemy!

EscortBiz · 01-08-2009, 10:41 PM

lol

what about throwing in some saving the environment and al gore crap in the mix of all that convo

Sly · 01-08-2009, 10:41 PM

Donate blood and get a cookie.

Cory W · 01-08-2009, 10:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by A1R3K

Ok, who are you?

What are you doing in Cory's nick?

UBBER?

THEIR - THERE - THEY'RE grammar mistakes

Blasphemy!

haha

My grammar is awful without a text editor!

seeric · 01-08-2009, 10:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WEG Cory

haha

My grammar is awful without a text editor!

Can you hear me now?

batts · 01-08-2009, 10:44 PM

How do i get hold of someone from WegCash ?

ExLust · 01-08-2009, 10:44 PM

Donations to the victims.

»Rob Content« · 01-08-2009, 10:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by batts

How do i get hold of someone from WegCash ?

http://wegcash.com/contactUs.html

Cory also has this thing in his sig called ICQ, it's a newer piece of messenger software that some people in adult are using. You can read up more about it at icq.com

Cory - ICQ: 292310358

DatingGold · 01-09-2009, 12:30 AM

spot on lol

After Shock Media · 01-09-2009, 12:36 AM

Sure glad I do not use a board tracker or something.

KillerK · 01-09-2009, 02:59 AM

earthquakes aren't shit, try a tornado on for size!

munki · 01-09-2009, 06:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KillerK

earthquakes aren't shit, try a tornado on for size!

No thanks I'm perfectly find with my occasional ground shakes over the seasonal destruction.

tranza · 01-09-2009, 06:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by munki

no thanks i'm perfectly find with my occasional ground shakes over the seasonal destruction.

ahahhahhhaah

01-08-2009, 10:37 PM	#1
Cory W Deeply shallow Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Hollywood, Ca. Posts: 9,133	How to properly cover a minor earthquake in Los Angeles. First and foremost, its important that you put a big graphic up that reads EARTHQUAKE BREAKING NEWS COVERAGE. Surrounding this verbiage with broken bricks is usually spot on. Next, you send out a chopper to fly over the area that felt the 3 seconds of shaking. This is ubber important that you have someone in the sky filming people carrying groceries to their cars while he talks about how their was just an earthquake. After this, you request that people send in pictures of minor damage, which is basically picture frames laying on the floor. Then, you ask the old guy at the Earthquake News Conference if this is a precursor to a larger event, at least 30 times. If you are good, you reword the question several times, but make sure you keep using the word "event" in place of "quake." You also need to ask him what kind of quake it is and if its an aftershock of the '94 quake, which is located roughly 57 miles northwest of the recent quake and 10 fault lines over. Once you figure out that no one is dying in a collapsed toolshed, you start talking to building experts and they will tell you that all the buildings in LA can withstand a 4.5 quake. Act amazed. Make sure that you keep that seismograph thingy going at all times, even in a pip screen in the corner. Give out the red cross number, remind people to donate blood. When all else fails, warn people that they should expect aftershocks. If any aftershocks are reported, try to make them out like they are new "events." Then repeat everything. After all is done, make sure your segway to the weather girl is a question about her opinion on the quake, because, as we all know, she's a fucking earthquake expert. __________________ ICQ: 292310358 Offering writing and content services (mainstream). Marketing for L3 Payments

01-08-2009, 10:39 PM	#2
Iron Fist Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Dec 2006 Posts: 23,400	Drama = Ratings __________________ i like waffles

01-08-2009, 10:41 PM	#4
EscortBiz Fuck Checks, CASH only! Join Date: May 2002 Location: New York City Posts: 19,422	lol what about throwing in some saving the environment and al gore crap in the mix of all that convo __________________ Spanking, Medical Fetish, Sleeping, Strap-on Anal Lesbians, Girls Fucking Guys, Handjob site REAL HOT, Shemales, Anal and Ass Licking sites 100% Real EXCLUSIVE with amazing retention, ccbill payouts, lots of content FREE FTP HOSTING Promote the largest and oldest member paid escort site, Converts 10 times better then any dating site, CCBill payouts ICQ# 158802076

01-08-2009, 10:41 PM	#5
Sly Let's do some business! Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 31,328	Donate blood and get a cookie. __________________ Vacares - Web Hosting, Domains, O365, Security & More - Paxum and BTC Accepted Windows VPS now available Great for TSS, Nifty Stats, remote work, virtual assistants, etc. Click here for more details.

01-08-2009, 10:44 PM	#9
ExLust Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 3,223	Donations to the victims. __________________ BE A PARTNER

01-08-2009, 10:40 PM	#3
seeric .......... Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: .......... Posts: 41,917	Ok, who are you? What are you doing in Cory's nick? UBBER? THEIR - THERE - THEY'RE grammar mistakes Blasphemy!

01-08-2009, 10:44 PM	#8
batts So Fucking Banned Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 1,266	How do i get hold of someone from WegCash ?

01-09-2009, 12:30 AM	#11
DatingGold $6 PER EMAIL JOiN Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: California Posts: 13,185	spot on lol __________________ 9 Years of SOLID payouts and conversions! ADULT DATING - $100 PPS LIVE CAMS - $214 PPS WWW.DATINGGOLD.COM ICQ: 27442303

01-09-2009, 12:36 AM	#12
After Shock Media It's coming look busy Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: "Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn". Posts: 35,299	Sure glad I do not use a board tracker or something. __________________ [email protected] ICQ:135982156 AIM: Aftershockmed1a MSN: [email protected]

01-09-2009, 02:59 AM	#13
KillerK Confirmed User Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 3,406	earthquakes aren't shit, try a tornado on for size!