pubic lice...

It can't get any smaller than that
lol

never had it but annoys me to think about it

Getting calls on my fax machine from telephones.

:winkwink:

People who answer the phone while having sex. They do it on TV all the time, but a lot of people in real life do it too. All I know is the phone can wait, once I'm slamming her like a freight train this locomotive stops for no one and nothing short of a direct nuclear hit. And even then...

Women of the world be warned, if you ever find yourself under me and the phone rings, answer it at your own peril.

Only complete idiot losers put sex on hold to yap on the phone.

There, I said it.

having the waitress that just put your food on the table come back right after you put the food in your mouth and ask how everything is.......

That happens to me all the time... Grrrrrrrr!

mine is crunching.if i can hear someone eating sometimes that just gets under mine skin!ESpecially smacking man i could just fuckin lose it!!:2 cents:

Slow moving elderly people, stopped working, already one foot in the grave, majority of friends dead - who desperately grab a chance to small talk with store clerks. Always happens at magazine shops when i get a pack of cigs and am in a hurry. It seems like those are the number 1 spots for old hags to get three stamps and take about 10 minutes buying them because they keep chatting with the store clerk behind the counter.

Not being able to find a decent cartoon on the fucking TV on Saturday morning.

What the hell has become of this world? :mad:

Today it is my spaniel deciding that the only pen I actually like in the house is the one that needed to be chewed.

That gets me every time, no matter how much planning I put into the shopping list beforehand.

Amen brother! That and people who will queue in a long-ass line for a till to ask the worker where something is, when customer services over in the other direction not only had no line waiting, but would also know the answer. :disgust

Another one of mine from my time spent at a well-known UK catalog-based store (I don't know if you have them in the US, but you basically walk in, browse the store catalog, write down the numers of the items you want, and go to the till, where they are then fetched for you from the warehouse after you've paid) was when people came up to the till and asked: "Which of these 15,000 pages in the catalog are specialist dog-watch-thermometer-shitters on?"; because surely I must have an encyclopaedic knowledge of the entire catalog to work there... :mad:

That was so funny. Im almost crying

Oh lawd, I'm one of those old people who chats with the check out folks! Usually it's not a problem with locals behind me but during vacation times when we get the leafers and "Oh honey, let's rent a cabin out in the woods then bitch because there aren't any 5 star restaurants and the local Ingles doesn't sell caviar." I'm sure I'm pissing someone off :)

I hate it when I accidentally move my laptop too forward and it pulls out the plug. So, I am here working and not knowing that the power is running down until I get a message it is about to run out. Then I am having to move quickly and plug it back in.

When Im driving down the street at night and i'm the only car. I make 3 or 4 green lights. Then for some unknown reason, I hit a red light and their is no one waiting at the intersection.

waiting in line at the post office and seeing the 4 old people in front of me who all waited 45 minutes all buy one fucking stamp. When the price went up two cents that stood in line and bought 2 two cent stamps. I was so tired of waiting in line I bought every two cent stamp they had and when I came back I gave them out for free to get all the old fucks out of the line so I could move through it faster. They drive 5 miles to spend 4 cents LOL, then they act like I am God for saving them less then a dime. wtf

Both of those bother me. Brushing your teeth is a private thing and kind of gross to watch. Keep it in the bathroom.

And stop wasting water!

Today mine is my boyfriend putting his already dry clothes in the dryer for the full 45 minutes when it only takes 10 to get the wrinkles out.:mad:

To make it worse....he always irons them anyway!

Today mine is....
one of the guys I work with who is a total idiot. Seems he came in this past weekend. Which explains.
3 open cans of pop all which are 1/2 full or more scattered around work.
The over stuffed trash can that was emptied friday.
Not sure I want to know why the Microwave is unpluged.
But I am going to ask him why my system was turned off.......

Hell of a way to start the week.

NosMo

you almost crying tells me you too have a cat!

Meoow
*pointing @ mouth*

Mine does that too. He didn't even know you could do that until I told him how to do it (because I am not going to iron for him or anybody). Yet, he can't grasp the 'damp' cloth..ie not soaking wet...or the short amount of time needed.

We have 2 of them. I can completely relate to the cartoon except the baseball bat... I'm sure they would if they could. :Oh crap

My boyfriends logic .."ignore them. they will go away". Sometimes he can be an idiot.

Cries an army of women the world over ;)

Today it's movie censorship. Last night there wasn't much on so I flipped over to one of the Movie Central channels to rewatch The Big Lebowski, one of my favorite movies. You'd think on a channel that is part of a network that is said to be the Canadian HBO that they would have sense enough to run original uncut movies... and they mostly do. But not with this film for some reason. Some fucknut censorist took it upon him (or her) self to either blank out every "F" word or replace it with "freakin'".

I turned it off after 20 minutes. That film just doesn't have the same impact without the odd "Shut the fuck up Donny" in there. Shame on Movie Central for being such pussies.

yeah, melon farming moments (so called as 'mother fucker' was once turned into 'melon farmer' in a film) used to actually be a hobby of mine. I used to think it was funny how things would get changed for regular tv. The one I always remember is a version I saw of Peggy Sue Got Married on ABC late at night when I was in my teens. There is a scene where they talk about sex in a car ..she is talking about the nickname for his dick. Suddenly on the tv version has a a train passing in the background..then a fog horn..getting louder and louder until the scene is over.