I Need a position filled FAST. Must be female. - GoFuckYourself.com

jimthefiend · 03-19-2007, 02:55 PM

I am accepting applications for the position of my future ex-wife.

The ideal candidate will posess a medium to high level skillset in the following areas:

1: Penile maintenence (using all 4 major techniques and appliances).
2: Food preparation using both conventional and microwave heating devices.
3: Beer retrieval and dispersal.
4: Bathroom, Kitchen and living area sterilization.
5: Advanced lawn care.

If you feel you are qualified; please send a resume, nude photo and copy of your most recent bank statement to: fiend ATTT ********************.

TurboAngel · 03-19-2007, 03:12 PM

Honez · 03-19-2007, 03:12 PM

Advanced lawn care. Is that slang for 'trimming the bush'?

jimthefiend · 03-19-2007, 03:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Honez

Advanced lawn care. Is that slang for 'trimming the bush'?

No, that means mowing the lawn. It's really hilly and rocky here. All I have is a push mower and I'm getting on in years. I need someone to handle that for me.

stickyfingerz · 03-19-2007, 03:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jimthefiend

No, that means mowing the lawn. It's really hilly and rocky here. All I have is a push mower and I'm getting on in years. I need someone to handle that for me.

Must take a long time to mow 200 acres with that..

jimthefiend · 03-19-2007, 03:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stickyfingerz

Must take a long time to mow 200 acres with that..

It's 80, but only about 1.5 is lawn. Should be a good work out for some filly.

TexasDreams · 03-19-2007, 03:17 PM

There's always *******!

[IMG]http://www.blingstudio.com/*******.gif[/IMG] [IMG]http://www.blingstudio.com/*******.gif[/IMG] [IMG]http://www.blingstudio.com/*******.gif[/IMG] [IMG]http://www.blingstudio.com/*******.gif[/IMG] [IMG]http://www.blingstudio.com/*******.gif[/IMG]

stickyfingerz · 03-19-2007, 03:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jimthefiend

It's 80, but only about 1.5 is lawn. Should be a good work out for some filly.

errr umm hmmmm

https://gfy.com/10394693-post52.html

jimthefiend · 03-19-2007, 03:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stickyfingerz

errr umm hmmmm

https://gfy.com/10394693-post52.html

Whats your fucking point?

I sold off some shit last month. I'm sorry I neglected to post that on GFY. I will not let it happen again.

Idiot.

Kimmykim · 03-19-2007, 03:39 PM

What's it pay? I think if it's enough, I could outsource it all and still make a profit.

Violetta · 03-19-2007, 03:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TexasDreams

There's always *******!

[IMG]http://www.blingstudio.com/*******.gif[/IMG] [IMG]http://www.blingstudio.com/*******.gif[/IMG] [IMG]http://www.blingstudio.com/*******.gif[/IMG] [IMG]http://www.blingstudio.com/*******.gif[/IMG] [IMG]http://www.blingstudio.com/*******.gif[/IMG]

hahaha... wtf???????????

u-Bob · 03-19-2007, 04:22 PM

found you one:

03-19-2007, 02:55 PM	#1
jimthefiend So Fucking Banned Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: icq: 121189 Posts: 18,889	I Need a position filled FAST. Must be female. I am accepting applications for the position of my future ex-wife. The ideal candidate will posess a medium to high level skillset in the following areas: 1: Penile maintenence (using all 4 major techniques and appliances). 2: Food preparation using both conventional and microwave heating devices. 3: Beer retrieval and dispersal. 4: Bathroom, Kitchen and living area sterilization. 5: Advanced lawn care. If you feel you are qualified; please send a resume, nude photo and copy of your most recent bank statement to: fiend ATTT ********************.

03-19-2007, 03:12 PM	#3
Honez Confirmed Brat Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Colorado Springs, CO Posts: 6,636	Advanced lawn care. Is that slang for 'trimming the bush'? __________________ Your Paysite Partner Hone at YourPaysitePartner dot Com Skype - Stressmonkey

03-19-2007, 03:17 PM	#7
TexasDreams former Miserable Admin :) Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Somewhere in Cali Posts: 4,700	There's always *****! [IMG]http://www.blingstudio.com/***.gif[/IMG] [IMG]http://www.blingstudio.com/***.gif[/IMG] [IMG]http://www.blingstudio.com/***.gif[/IMG] [IMG]http://www.blingstudio.com/***.gif[/IMG] [IMG]http://www.blingstudio.com/*****.gif[/IMG] __________________ ICQ: 168-914-369 >>> sysop [at] TexasDreams [dot] com

03-19-2007, 03:12 PM	#2
TurboAngel H.B.I.C. Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: NC Posts: 30,122

03-19-2007, 03:39 PM	#10
Kimmykim bitchslapping zebras!!!!! Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: In a shack by the beach Posts: 16,015	What's it pay? I think if it's enough, I could outsource it all and still make a profit.

03-19-2007, 04:22 PM	#12
u-Bob there's no $$$ in porn Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: icq: 195./568.-230 (btw: not getting offline msgs) Posts: 33,063	found you one: