Friday night binge drinking TIPS! - GoFuckYourself.com

BradM · 06-03-2006, 03:34 AM

Here are a few things I have learned tonight:
1) Do not vomit on the bartender. He will take offence to it and likely stop serving you the yummy beverages you've been pounding back all night.
2) Do not vomit anywhere in the bar outside of the restroom.
3) Leave all clothing on at all times.
4) Don't try to Tom Cruise your beer like it is a vodka bottle. There's no top on a glass of Stella.
5) Don't yell "HEY. Hey..... HEY........ HEY" repeatedly when trying to get someones attention.
6) If you MUST touch breasts, ensure the breast's hand does not have a wedding ring on.
7) Do not dirty dance with your best friend - who happens to be male.
8) On the drive home, keep your window up. A wide open window with a head sticking out at 3am is a surefire way to attract attention.
9) No one cares that you're drunk. Stop bragging about it in the hallways of your apartment complex.
........
10) Do not call ex girlfriends. Not because you're drunk, but because no one likes getting woken up at 3am to: "HEY. Hey..... HEY........ HEY"

kanalj · 06-03-2006, 03:38 AM

Sig spot.
HEY!

sonofsam · 06-03-2006, 03:43 AM

I saw someone do something stupid tonight.. so i'll add to the list

11.) Don't start a fight with someone at a party, and then bitch out and try and drive away when the guy steps to you - and end up driving your jeep into a ditch and tipping it on it's side

BradM · 06-03-2006, 03:46 AM

Hahaha niceeeee.

drama · 06-03-2006, 04:13 AM

You're ruining our industry's reputation with posts like this ;)

BradM · 06-03-2006, 04:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by drama

You're ruining our industry's reputation with posts like this ;)

This industry has had a poor reputation since the first woman showed her tits for money, I sincerely doubt me drinking alcohol is making a difference on any front. But nice try son.

sonofsam · 06-03-2006, 04:19 AM

12.) Don't blaze when you're already hammered drunk - you'll get the spins and puke

sonofsam · 06-03-2006, 04:20 AM

13.) ...... under no circumstances is it good to line up 7 chairs in a line and bet people you can jump over them all.... unless you're wearing some kind of ankle brace that will prevent your ankle from spraining when you bail... that's right... not IF you bail.. WHEN.

drama · 06-03-2006, 06:07 AM

i just fine it amazing that i talk about some blow and people ride me but here you are talking about driving while impaired and assaulting women and no one has a problem with it

Vasago Reno · 06-03-2006, 07:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by drama

i just fine it amazing that i talk about some blow and people ride me but here you are talking about driving while impaired and assaulting women and no one has a problem with it

You're a genuine, 100% certified asshole - on a number of levels.

MaddCaz · 06-03-2006, 07:03 AM

just watch out for the beer goggles

06-03-2006, 03:34 AM	#1
BradM Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: 1123,6536,5231 Posts: 3,397	Friday night binge drinking TIPS! Here are a few things I have learned tonight: 1) Do not vomit on the bartender. He will take offence to it and likely stop serving you the yummy beverages you've been pounding back all night. 2) Do not vomit anywhere in the bar outside of the restroom. 3) Leave all clothing on at all times. 4) Don't try to Tom Cruise your beer like it is a vodka bottle. There's no top on a glass of Stella. 5) Don't yell "HEY. Hey..... HEY........ HEY" repeatedly when trying to get someones attention. 6) If you MUST touch breasts, ensure the breast's hand does not have a wedding ring on. 7) Do not dirty dance with your best friend - who happens to be male. 8) On the drive home, keep your window up. A wide open window with a head sticking out at 3am is a surefire way to attract attention. 9) No one cares that you're drunk. Stop bragging about it in the hallways of your apartment complex. ........ 10) Do not call ex girlfriends. Not because you're drunk, but because no one likes getting woken up at 3am to: "HEY. Hey..... HEY........ HEY"

06-03-2006, 03:38 AM	#2
kanalj Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Sweden Posts: 639	Sig spot. HEY! __________________ I made that back in the days!

06-03-2006, 03:43 AM	#3
sonofsam Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Vancouver Posts: 18,639	I saw someone do something stupid tonight.. so i'll add to the list 11.) Don't start a fight with someone at a party, and then bitch out and try and drive away when the guy steps to you - and end up driving your jeep into a ditch and tipping it on it's side __________________ I like turtles.

06-03-2006, 04:19 AM	#7
sonofsam Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Vancouver Posts: 18,639	12.) Don't blaze when you're already hammered drunk - you'll get the spins and puke __________________ I like turtles.

06-03-2006, 04:20 AM	#8
sonofsam Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Vancouver Posts: 18,639	13.) ...... under no circumstances is it good to line up 7 chairs in a line and bet people you can jump over them all.... unless you're wearing some kind of ankle brace that will prevent your ankle from spraining when you bail... that's right... not IF you bail.. WHEN. __________________ I like turtles.

06-03-2006, 03:46 AM	#4
BradM Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: 1123,6536,5231 Posts: 3,397	Hahaha niceeeee.

06-03-2006, 04:13 AM	#5
drama Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 847	You're ruining our industry's reputation with posts like this ;)

06-03-2006, 06:07 AM	#9
drama Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 847	i just fine it amazing that i talk about some blow and people ride me but here you are talking about driving while impaired and assaulting women and no one has a problem with it

06-03-2006, 07:03 AM	#11
MaddCaz Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Illinois Posts: 9,483	just watch out for the beer goggles __________________ BigCocks.com - MatureWomen.com - Tranny.com - DrunkGirls.com - TeenGirls.com - MonsterCock.com and many more... Click here to see them all!