Oxymorons... - GoFuckYourself.com

GTS Mark · 01-19-2006, 11:09 AM

Oxymorons....

1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?

5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?

6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?

7. Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?

8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges?

9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there?

10. Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting?

11. Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"?

12. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?

13. Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites?

14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?

15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?

16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?

17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

20. Why is bra singular and panties plural?

21. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?

22. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?

23. How come abbreviated is such a long word?

24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

25. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

26. Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one?

DH

ElvisManson · 01-19-2006, 11:12 AM

I thought you were going to comment on the idiots that are hooked on oxy's....lol

axelcat · 01-19-2006, 11:15 AM

23. How come abbreviated is such a long word?

lol.....the best one

GTS Mark · 01-19-2006, 11:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ElvisManson

I thought you were going to comment on the idiots that are hooked on oxy's....lol

Oh and I am sure there are a few

DH

GlydeGirl · 01-19-2006, 11:21 AM

Great list! LOL

Manowar · 01-19-2006, 11:28 AM

Those are great

flirty · 01-19-2006, 11:46 AM

nice list dude.... paste some more ;)

erehwon · 01-19-2006, 11:48 AM

Three of my favorites...

Why do tornados always strike trailer parks?
United Nations Forces
Military Intelligence

Ray@TastyDollars · 01-19-2006, 11:51 AM

18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

LOL

sicone · 01-19-2006, 11:52 AM

Good shit

Cash · 01-19-2006, 11:53 AM

hahaha, great, man, some are really great, thanks for sharing!

Mr. Jim · 01-19-2006, 12:02 PM

The Irony is that there is not really a true oxymoron of the list...

an oxymoron are conjoined words that have opposite or a contradictory meaning

for example: Jumbo Shrimp or Defeaning Silence

I would say the above are more Seinfeldisms....

ElvisManson · 01-19-2006, 12:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jim Hustler

The Irony is that there is not really a true oxymoron of the list...

an oxymoron are conjoined words that have opposite or a contradictory meaning

for example: Jumbo Shrimp or Defeaning Silence

I would say the above are more Seinfeldisms....

Heterosexual Marine is another one I believe.

WebairGerard · 01-19-2006, 12:22 PM

some good stuff there!

Dood · 01-19-2006, 12:23 PM

Why do we park on a driveway and drive on a parkway?

Mr. Jim · 01-19-2006, 12:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ElvisManson

Heterosexual Marine is another one I believe.

says the man spitting teeth

ElvisManson · 01-19-2006, 01:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jim Hustler

says the man spitting teeth

any movement on the video trade?

Mr. Jim · 01-19-2006, 02:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ElvisManson

any movement on the video trade?

We are still reeling from Vegas Brent...

I promise you we will get something going on some front. I have this Motocross film that has been looming forever and once we get some breathing room it is definitely a vehicle I would like to use for the band and a music video for the bonus section

Phoenix · 01-19-2006, 02:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jim Hustler

The Irony is that there is not really a true oxymoron of the list...

an oxymoron are conjoined words that have opposite or a contradictory meaning

for example: Jumbo Shrimp or Defeaning Silence

I would say the above are more Seinfeldisms....

i like Mark too much to have pointed this out..hehe

Mr. Jim · 01-19-2006, 02:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ElvisManson

any movement on the video trade?

Brent...

With our deep interest in the alt genre could you please send another package to the following

D. Rosenfeld
Hustler Video
8484 Wilshire
Beverly Hills CA 90211

Per Jim blah blah blah

I called him and he is expecting it

he is the man who handles music etc

Mr. Jim · 01-19-2006, 02:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Phoenix

i like Mark too much to have pointed this out..hehe

I like Mark...

I was just contributiong to the thread...

ElvisManson · 01-19-2006, 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jim Hustler

Brent...

With our deep interest in the alt genre could you please send another package to the following

D. Rosenfeld
Hustler Video
8484 Wilshire
Beverly Hills CA 90211

Per Jim blah blah blah

I called him and he is expecting it

he is the man who handles music etc

That's Great Jim...thx

I was talking about the motoxxx though.

je_rome · 01-19-2006, 03:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jim Hustler

The Irony is that there is not really a true oxymoron of the list...

an oxymoron are conjoined words that have opposite or a contradictory meaning

for example: Jumbo Shrimp or Defeaning Silence

I would say the above are more Seinfeldisms....

this is also what what I know about oxymoron. other examples are:
- open secret
- Adult male
- baby giant

...and others

_Danielle_ · 01-19-2006, 04:03 PM

Why is it called a building when it's not in the process? (built??)

Tala · 01-19-2006, 04:08 PM

Microsoft Works.

Mr. Jim · 01-19-2006, 04:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ElvisManson

That's Great Jim...thx

I was talking about the motoxxx though.

same guy its a joint ven with me and LFP

MotoXXX is a proj with me and Dave they will dist i still need to finish the final edit here......

sorry left that out

czarina · 01-19-2006, 04:12 PM

It seems greaahopper that you have come a long way in your life. Now just tell me the difference between a bicycle, and you can walk the path of the gods!

ElvisManson · 01-19-2006, 04:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jim Hustler

same guy its a joint ven with me and LFP

MotoXXX is a proj with me and Dave they will dist i still need to finish the final edit here......

sorry left that out

sounds good. just lmk when you guys are ready.

_Danielle_ · 01-19-2006, 04:21 PM

silent cry
virtual reality

Phoenix · 01-19-2006, 04:46 PM

hehe

why a driveway...you park there
parkway is something you drive on as well..lol

and dont most freeways have a toll?

PixeLs · 01-19-2006, 08:35 PM

Haha

Nice post!

Vitasoy · 01-20-2006, 03:02 AM

Some of those are great.

mojojojo-hodough · 01-20-2006, 06:05 AM

Yeah and "Why do we call it "fast food," its not like it's going anywhere?"
Great thread

ServerGenius · 01-20-2006, 06:08 AM

If nothing sticks to teflon how do they make teflon stick to a pan

Serge Litehead · 01-20-2006, 08:15 AM

used to have nickname hotice

EroticySteve · 01-20-2006, 09:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrinkingHARDER

Oxymorons....

1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?

5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?

6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?

7. Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?

8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges?

9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there?

10. Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting?

11. Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"?

12. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?

13. Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites?

14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?

15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?

16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?

17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

20. Why is bra singular and panties plural?

21. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?

22. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?

23. How come abbreviated is such a long word?

24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

25. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

26. Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one?

DH

Very valid points that I have no answers for.

Did you have the drive on a parkway and park in a driveway in there too?

01-19-2006, 11:09 AM	#1
GTS Mark Vrume Mark Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Toronto, Canada Posts: 20,912	Oxymorons... Oxymorons.... 1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks? 2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand? 3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know? 4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words? 5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack? 6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing? 7. Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing? 8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges? 9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there? 10. Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting? 11. Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"? 12. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected? 13. Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites? 14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things? 15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds? 16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it? 17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting? 18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? 19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right? 20. Why is bra singular and panties plural? 21. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead? 22. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase? 23. How come abbreviated is such a long word? 24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them? 25. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? 26. Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one? DH

01-19-2006, 11:48 AM	#8
erehwon Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: A secure undisclosed location... Posts: 3,759	Three of my favorites... Why do tornados always strike trailer parks? United Nations Forces Military Intelligence __________________ Money NEVER $leep$...

01-19-2006, 11:51 AM	#9
Ray@TastyDollars www.TastyDollars.com Join Date: May 2002 Location: Montreal Posts: 6,797	18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? LOL __________________ The nets best interracial and cuckold site The nets hottest teen site ICQ me: 161 375 873

01-19-2006, 11:52 AM	#10
sicone Retired Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Sac Posts: 18,453	Good shit __________________

01-19-2006, 11:53 AM	#11
Cash Click on my TCG signature Join Date: Feb 2002 Posts: 20,825	hahaha, great, man, some are really great, thanks for sharing! __________________ $9.95/month for 15000 GB bandwidth monthly, unlimited (sub)domains and MySQL5, PHP4/5, 500 GB disk storage! ; use any of these invitation codes: 216263692101; 408636009193; 846090586647; my ICQ 30160426!

01-19-2006, 11:12 AM	#2
ElvisManson Looking California Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 5,476	I thought you were going to comment on the idiots that are hooked on oxy's....lol

01-19-2006, 11:15 AM	#3
axelcat Adult Locals Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: West Coast Posts: 25,450	23. How come abbreviated is such a long word? lol.....the best one

01-19-2006, 11:21 AM	#5
GlydeGirl Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 1,516	Great list! LOL

01-19-2006, 11:28 AM	#6
Manowar jellyfish Join Date: Dec 2003 Posts: 71,528	Those are great

01-19-2006, 11:46 AM	#7
flirty Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 2,840	nice list dude.... paste some more ;)

01-19-2006, 12:02 PM	#12
Mr. Jim Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 4,372	The Irony is that there is not really a true oxymoron of the list... an oxymoron are conjoined words that have opposite or a contradictory meaning for example: Jumbo Shrimp or Defeaning Silence I would say the above are more Seinfeldisms....

01-19-2006, 12:22 PM	#14
WebairGerard Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2005 Posts: 8,113	some good stuff there! __________________

01-19-2006, 12:23 PM	#15
Dood Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: MidSouth US Posts: 353	Why do we park on a driveway and drive on a parkway? __________________ Traffic-Out We sell quality text link clicked traffic

01-19-2006, 04:03 PM	#24
_Danielle_ Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: The OC Posts: 949	Why is it called a building when it's not in the process? (built??) __________________

01-19-2006, 04:08 PM	#25
Tala Fucked if I know Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Do you have a flag? Posts: 23,368	Microsoft Works. __________________ ICQ: 11120676 \| Google: mindcrime \| Skype: suitemindcrime\|E-Mail: mindcrime AT gmail.com\|PR girl with great writing skills for hire!!!! Contact me to work for YOU!\|TECHIEMEDIA? 24/7 support from some of the best techs in the biz. Tell Jim that I sent you.

01-19-2006, 04:12 PM	#27
czarina Webmaster Extraordinaire Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: A beautiful beach... Posts: 10,748	It seems greaahopper that you have come a long way in your life. Now just tell me the difference between a bicycle, and you can walk the path of the gods!

01-19-2006, 04:21 PM	#29
_Danielle_ Confirmed User Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: The OC Posts: 949	silent cry virtual reality __________________

01-19-2006, 04:46 PM	#30
Phoenix BACON BACON BACON Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Poems everybody, the laddie fancies himself a poet Posts: 35,462	hehe why a driveway...you park there parkway is something you drive on as well..lol and dont most freeways have a toll? __________________ Skype Phoenixskype1 Telegram PhoenixBrad https://quantads.io

01-19-2006, 08:35 PM	#31
PixeLs Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 11,922	Haha Nice post! __________________ Make money on any traffic. Bi-weekly payments with no hold.

01-20-2006, 03:02 AM	#32
Vitasoy GFY HALL OF FAME DAMMIT!!! Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 58,202	Some of those are great. __________________ [email protected]

01-20-2006, 06:05 AM	#33
mojojojo-hodough Registered User Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 81	Yeah and "Why do we call it "fast food," its not like it's going anywhere?" Great thread __________________ Justin Affiliate Rep ICQ 329-778-676 [email protected] www.hushhushentertainment.com Backend by NATS epassporte payments $30-$35 PPS

01-20-2006, 06:08 AM	#34
ServerGenius Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Amsterdam Posts: 9,377	If nothing sticks to teflon how do they make teflon stick to a pan __________________ \| http://www.sinnerscash.com/ \| ICQ: 370820 \| Skype: SinnersCash \| AdultWhosWho \|

01-20-2006, 08:15 AM	#35
Serge Litehead Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Behind the scenes Posts: 5,190	used to have nickname hotice __________________ SilverCrocodile.com Adult web design since '05