ISP over bandwidth - GoFuckYourself.com

SmokeyTheBear · 12-19-2005, 04:18 PM

ring ring....

me- "hello"

myisp- " hi this is ray with your isp"

me- " hi ray, are you calling to give me a discount for the downtime last week ? "

myisp- " huh ?"

me- " you had some downtime last week , i thought maybe you were just calling to apologize and give me a refund, oh whoops wait hell hasn't frozen over "

myisp- " huh?"

me- " never mind i was just joking with you , why did you call ?"

meisp- "we have been monitoring your internet conection over the last month and noticed some spikes in your bandwidth "

me- " cool , i mustbe getting my money's worth , see anything interesting "

myisp- " huh ?"

me- " never mind just me attempting some humour again "

myisp - " this is a serious issue your using twice the badnwidth we allow "

me- " there must be some mistake im on the "unlimited" plan "

myisp- " no there's a limit of XXX "

me- " really , you should say that instead of unlimited then dont you think ? "

myisp- " i dont think it says that "

me- " i'm pretty sure it does , ME READING FROM BILL AND SPELLING OUT UNLIMITED .. u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d.. yup it says right here on my bill unlimited "

myisp- " that doesnt include bandwidth "

me- " really , what does it include "

myisp " i dont know but it doesnt include bandwidth "

me- " do you have accounts that include bandwidth "

myisp " all our accounts include bandwidth "

me- " isnt that contrary to what you just told me ? "

myisp " ...... "

me- " ok well cut to the chase , i am a busy man "

myisp " if you go over your bandwidth we will have to suspend your account "

me- " that wouldnt be very smart now would it , why would you lose a customer because he shops too much "

mysip" thats just policy sir "

me- " ok well figure it out i'm already on the most expensive package you have so bill me or suspend me , but i dont have time to sit here jabbering with you about it. "

myisp " so do you want us to suspend your account "

me- " do what you have to do , i paid for internet, if i dont get it i will obviously not be paying you.. unless you have some sort of other plan for me "

myisp -" do you want my supervisor to phone you ? "

me- " no , i dont like getting phone calls . "

myisp " how should my superviser get in contact with you ? "

me- " he shouldnt unless he plans on paying me for my time "

myisp " i see , ok well i will unsuspend your account but dont go over the limit again "

me- " merry christmas "

myisp " bzzzzzzzz"

sicone · 12-19-2005, 04:24 PM

I didnt know they had a cap on bw usage for internet

SquireMD · 12-19-2005, 04:25 PM

MUST be comcast

SmokeyTheBear · 12-19-2005, 04:26 PM

i knew they had one , but never really paid much attention i was just hassling the guy , i think its like 100 gigs or something /pm

SmokeyTheBear · 12-19-2005, 04:27 PM

most isp's just cap your speeds instead of the overall bandwidth

SmokeyTheBear · 12-19-2005, 04:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SquireMD

MUST be comcast

no im banned from comcast

longer story..

wdsguy · 12-19-2005, 04:29 PM

Smokey why u gotto be hassling the guy who was prob just getting paid min wage lol.

SmokeyTheBear · 12-19-2005, 04:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wdsguy

Smokey why u gotto be hassling the guy who was prob just getting paid min wage lol.

well i thought i would just put alittle spin on his daily routine.

i would have found humour if i was him..

nebula · 12-19-2005, 04:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SmokeyTheBear

no im banned from comcast

longer story..

Story plz.

Screaming · 12-19-2005, 04:39 PM

Now that is funny

Sosa · 12-19-2005, 04:42 PM

lol sounds like the old days

BRISK · 12-19-2005, 04:46 PM

ISPs and their "Unlimited Download" plans are such BS. Bait & switch.

JD · 12-19-2005, 04:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nebula

Story plz.

Brujah · 12-19-2005, 04:49 PM

tell him you think you were infected with some spyware that is probably burning up all your bandwidth, and have him help you fix it.

Pete-KT · 12-19-2005, 04:50 PM

thats a good one i love fuckin with people on the phone

Furious_Male · 12-19-2005, 04:52 PM

Thats a great exchange

woj · 12-19-2005, 05:01 PM

heh, good stuff

ry0t · 12-19-2005, 05:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SmokeyTheBear

no im banned from comcast

longer story..

Yeah tell that story.

SomeCreep · 12-19-2005, 07:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ry0t

Yeah tell that story.

Alex · 12-19-2005, 07:15 PM

I bet any amount of money taht you didnt really say that.

But said something else when you meant to tell the guy off.

And then looked back and said to yourself "Man i should have said this instead of sounding like an idiot"

SmokeyTheBear · 12-19-2005, 07:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alex

I bet any amount of money taht you didnt really say that.

But said something else when you meant to tell the guy off.

And then looked back and said to yourself "Man i should have said this instead of sounding like an idiot"

i bet you dont know me very well

pornguy · 12-19-2005, 07:18 PM

Smokey what part of the comuntry are you in?

SmokeyTheBear · 12-19-2005, 07:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pornguy

Smokey what part of the comuntry are you in?

a few , west canada, texas, washington d.c. , etc.

fr0gman · 12-19-2005, 07:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SmokeyTheBear

no im banned from comcast

longer story..

I moved to Sacramento back in '99 and my quest for a place to live included finding high speed internet. So I googled the area and Comcast offered cable internet in my area. I filled out there form BEFORE I moved so as to avoid the obligatory 10 to 15 days to connect.

I move into my new pad expecting a hookup any day. After about a week I call Comcast and they tell me that they don't really have cable in where I live. WHAT? I explained that it said so on their website, complete with a "put in your address to confirm availability" form... which by the way confirmed that my new house was in their coverage area.

Comcast informed me that they just put that up to "gauge consumer interest". BULLSHIT! I didn't move here to be a statistic in their marketing research.

After approximately 732 hours on the phone with 811 bone-head customer service pukes I finally got in touch with a technician who told me that they were planning a Beta test program but that I was outside the test area.

I had nothing else to do (no internet service), so I went down town to the Public Service Commission office (something to be said for living in the State Capitol). Anyways, I told my story to the PSC people and they were not too happy with what they called deceptive marketing practices and they made a call to Comcast and would you believe that that very same day I was called by Comcast and offered a connection in the Beta test program?

The great thing about it is that my service agreement came with most of the fields typed in and under "Billing Type" they had printed NEVER. Now, Comcast sold out to @Home who later turned into Excite @Home who later sold out to AT&T Broadband. Through all of that I faxed my golden NEVER-bill-me ticket to each successive parent company and they all honored the original agreement.

I have had cable internet since 1999 and have never paid one single bill.

bringer · 12-19-2005, 07:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SquireMD

MUST be comcast

whats wrong with comcast? the only thing that annoys me about my isp is the constant company shifts. i started with roadrunner, then mediaone, then at&t and now comcast. waiting for google to buy comcast

Paul Waters · 12-19-2005, 07:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fr0gman

I have had cable internet since 1999 and have never paid one single bill.

I won an "Internet for Life" contest run by a subsidiary of Rogers, the local cable supplier in most of Toronto. At the time they aggressively advertised "Unlimited Internet"

Two years ago, they started harassing high volume users and cancelling their service. It was so fecked up; they would not tell anyone what the cap was.

They cut me off.

I responded, but I am not allowed to discuss any details.

Suffice to say they are providing me service, and I download everything I want.

Tom_PM · 12-19-2005, 08:09 PM

haha, I dont know Smokey personally either, but I find that completely plausible!

I had fun with a sales person for AOL when they wanted me to switch to AOL broadband. I'm on time warner road runner, so I asked her if she really wanted me to take money out of their left pocket, and put it into their right. Same damn company. She agreed it made no sense to call me, lol.

12-19-2005, 04:18 PM	#1
SmokeyTheBear ►SouthOfHeaven Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: PlanetEarth MyBoardRank: GerbilMaster My-Penis-Size: extralarge MyWeapon: Computer Posts: 28,609	ISP over bandwidth ring ring.... me- "hello" myisp- " hi this is ray with your isp" me- " hi ray, are you calling to give me a discount for the downtime last week ? " myisp- " huh ?" me- " you had some downtime last week , i thought maybe you were just calling to apologize and give me a refund, oh whoops wait hell hasn't frozen over " myisp- " huh?" me- " never mind i was just joking with you , why did you call ?" meisp- "we have been monitoring your internet conection over the last month and noticed some spikes in your bandwidth " me- " cool , i mustbe getting my money's worth , see anything interesting " myisp- " huh ?" me- " never mind just me attempting some humour again " myisp - " this is a serious issue your using twice the badnwidth we allow " me- " there must be some mistake im on the "unlimited" plan " myisp- " no there's a limit of XXX " me- " really , you should say that instead of unlimited then dont you think ? " myisp- " i dont think it says that " me- " i'm pretty sure it does , ME READING FROM BILL AND SPELLING OUT UNLIMITED .. u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d.. yup it says right here on my bill unlimited " myisp- " that doesnt include bandwidth " me- " really , what does it include " myisp " i dont know but it doesnt include bandwidth " me- " do you have accounts that include bandwidth " myisp " all our accounts include bandwidth " me- " isnt that contrary to what you just told me ? " myisp " ...... " me- " ok well cut to the chase , i am a busy man " myisp " if you go over your bandwidth we will have to suspend your account " me- " that wouldnt be very smart now would it , why would you lose a customer because he shops too much " mysip" thats just policy sir " me- " ok well figure it out i'm already on the most expensive package you have so bill me or suspend me , but i dont have time to sit here jabbering with you about it. " myisp " so do you want us to suspend your account " me- " do what you have to do , i paid for internet, if i dont get it i will obviously not be paying you.. unless you have some sort of other plan for me " myisp -" do you want my supervisor to phone you ? " me- " no , i dont like getting phone calls . " myisp " how should my superviser get in contact with you ? " me- " he shouldnt unless he plans on paying me for my time " myisp " i see , ok well i will unsuspend your account but dont go over the limit again " me- " merry christmas " myisp " bzzzzzzzz" __________________ hatisblack at yahoo.com

12-19-2005, 04:24 PM	#2
sicone Retired Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Sac Posts: 18,453	I didnt know they had a cap on bw usage for internet __________________

12-19-2005, 04:26 PM	#4
SmokeyTheBear ►SouthOfHeaven Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: PlanetEarth MyBoardRank: GerbilMaster My-Penis-Size: extralarge MyWeapon: Computer Posts: 28,609	i knew they had one , but never really paid much attention i was just hassling the guy , i think its like 100 gigs or something /pm __________________ hatisblack at yahoo.com

12-19-2005, 04:27 PM	#5
SmokeyTheBear ►SouthOfHeaven Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: PlanetEarth MyBoardRank: GerbilMaster My-Penis-Size: extralarge MyWeapon: Computer Posts: 28,609	most isp's just cap your speeds instead of the overall bandwidth __________________ hatisblack at yahoo.com

12-19-2005, 04:39 PM	#10
Screaming I can change this!!!!! Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 18,972	Now that is funny __________________

12-19-2005, 04:25 PM	#3
SquireMD ICQ # 229-616-436 Join Date: May 2005 Location: Land of Marion Barry Posts: 794	MUST be comcast

12-19-2005, 04:29 PM	#7
wdsguy Ryde or Die Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: California-Shanghai Posts: 19,568	Smokey why u gotto be hassling the guy who was prob just getting paid min wage lol.

12-19-2005, 04:42 PM	#11
Sosa In Tushy Land Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Nebraska Posts: 40,149	lol sounds like the old days

12-19-2005, 04:46 PM	#12
BRISK Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Feb 2003 Posts: 12,240	ISPs and their "Unlimited Download" plans are such BS. Bait & switch. __________________ I post on GFY so that when people ask me what I do, I can tell them that I work with the mentally retarded.

12-19-2005, 04:49 PM	#14
Brujah Beer Money Baron Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: brujah / gmail Posts: 22,157	tell him you think you were infected with some spyware that is probably burning up all your bandwidth, and have him help you fix it. __________________ Free Premium Domain Lists and Tools at Clickmojo.com For Sale: Obscenity.com

12-19-2005, 04:50 PM	#15
Pete-KT Workin With The Devil Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: West Bloomfield, MI Posts: 51,532	thats a good one i love fuckin with people on the phone

12-19-2005, 04:52 PM	#16
Furious_Male Doing the grind since 99 Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Buffalo NY Posts: 16,883	Thats a great exchange __________________ Living in Virtual Reality Contact: Email (preferred): furiousmale .at. gmail - Skype: live:shanedws

12-19-2005, 05:01 PM	#17
woj <&(©¿©)&> Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Chicago Posts: 47,882	heh, good stuff __________________ Custom Software Development, email: woj#at#wojfun#.#com to discuss details or skype: wojl2000 or gchat: wojfun or telegram: wojl2000 Affiliate program tools: Hosted Galleries Manager Banner Manager Video Manager Wordpress Affiliate Plugin Pic/Movie of the Day Fansign Generator Zip Manager

12-19-2005, 07:15 PM	#20
Alex So Fucking Banned (YEA!!) Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 10,963	I bet any amount of money taht you didnt really say that. But said something else when you meant to tell the guy off. And then looked back and said to yourself "Man i should have said this instead of sounding like an idiot" __________________ Care about me? Who? Me! Who?

12-19-2005, 07:18 PM	#22
pornguy Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Homeless Posts: 62,911	Smokey what part of the comuntry are you in? __________________ PornGuy skype me pornguy_epic AmateurDough The Hottes Shemales online! TChicks.com \| Angeles Cid \| Mariana Cordoba \| MAILERS WELCOME!

12-19-2005, 08:09 PM	#27
Tom_PM Porn Meister Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 16,443	haha, I dont know Smokey personally either, but I find that completely plausible! I had fun with a sales person for AOL when they wanted me to switch to AOL broadband. I'm on time warner road runner, so I asked her if she really wanted me to take money out of their left pocket, and put it into their right. Same damn company. She agreed it made no sense to call me, lol. __________________ 43-922-863 Shut up and play your guitar.