OK: Man Wakes Up To Find Testicles In A Padlock - GoFuckYourself.com

directfiesta · 08-05-2005, 08:36 PM

naughty boy ...

Quote:

August 5, 2005 10:00 p.m. EST

Brentwood, NH (AHN) - A 39-year-old man wakes up to find his testicles in a padlock, according to the Portsmouth Herald.

Police report the man is intoxicated when they arrive at the scene July 30 at about 3:40 am.

The unidentified man tells police that he had the padlock around his testicles for two weeks. He adds that a friend put the lock on while he was drunk and passed out. When he woke up, the friend was gone.

"Never in my 13 years have I seen anything like this," Cpl. H.D. Wood tells the Herald.

He is taken to Exeter Hospital, where a locksmith removes the padlock. He is treated and released, and the hospital says he had no lasting injury. Police say to the Herald that they did not know the motive for the incident.

Tom_PM · 08-05-2005, 08:37 PM

lmao, holy crap thats something else.

Spunky · 08-05-2005, 08:40 PM

I would be very afraid of the bolt cutters

iwantchixx · 08-05-2005, 10:22 PM

hehe, chastity for men?

Sure sounds like it.

I could never fuck with a padlock on my balls.

TheDoc · 08-05-2005, 10:35 PM

Hehe.. sounds like he might want to give up drinking

Evil1 · 08-05-2005, 11:01 PM

none of my friends play with my seeds when im drunk.. he needs new friends

demented · 08-05-2005, 11:08 PM

What kind of friends play with your fucking balls while you're drunk passed out?

"DUDE, lets put a padlock on his nuts! YEAH GOOD IDEA MAN!"

Vitasoy · 08-06-2005, 12:01 AM

haha that is hilarious... poor guy

Thomas1007 · 08-06-2005, 12:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by demented

What kind of friends play with your fucking balls while you're drunk passed out?

"DUDE, lets put a padlock on his nuts! YEAH GOOD IDEA MAN!"

hahahhaahaaa

exactly
time for new friends and Less beer

sicone · 08-06-2005, 12:12 AM

what kind of fucktard lets a friend put a pad lock on his nuts

xclusive · 08-06-2005, 12:20 AM

I hope that there is a pic of it as that is an owned pic waiting to happen

2257-Ben · 08-06-2005, 01:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by demented

What kind of friends play with your fucking balls while you're drunk passed out?

"DUDE, lets put a padlock on his nuts! YEAH GOOD IDEA MAN!"

Perhaps we'll see the vid on ConsumptionJunction...

bringer · 08-06-2005, 01:43 AM

poor locksmith

Manowar · 08-06-2005, 01:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by demented

What kind of friends play with your fucking balls while you're drunk passed out?

"DUDE, lets put a padlock on his nuts! YEAH GOOD IDEA MAN!"

Sparks · 08-06-2005, 01:51 AM

Ahahaha, that's terrible! Maybe his friends were just trying to tell him to quit drinking so much...

Antonio · 08-06-2005, 02:27 AM

with friends like this how long before he wakes up with a big fat cock up his ass?

SmokeyTheBear · 08-06-2005, 02:31 AM

gecko · 08-06-2005, 03:18 AM

Sucks to be him.

basschick · 08-06-2005, 03:25 AM

wow, cool - a new niche!

Quote:

Originally Posted by SmokeyTheBear

Wiggles · 08-06-2005, 04:12 AM

haha fuck what a retard, he even asked someone to put it on haha

Doc911 · 08-06-2005, 04:36 AM

lip lock = good
pad lock = bad

You got love friends that play with your nuts!

SouthernGirl · 08-06-2005, 10:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wiggles

haha fuck what a retard, he even asked someone to put it on haha

He adds that a friend put the lock on while he was drunk and passed out. When he woke up, the friend was gone.

tristan_D · 08-07-2005, 11:57 PM

too much for safe sex.

mardigras · 08-08-2005, 12:24 AM

How could he just walk around for 2 weeks before seeking help? He's about as stupid as his friend. May they have years of partying and playing with each other's nuts, they apparently are well matched

je_rome · 08-08-2005, 12:45 AM

he's such a poor guy! hilarious!

PixeLs · 08-08-2005, 04:02 AM

Ouch! That was a serious joke.

QuaWee · 08-08-2005, 10:06 AM

why does the most stupidest shit happen when you are drunk, lol

El Duderino · 08-08-2005, 10:09 AM

so was it on his nuts for a day or 2 weeks?

tungsten · 08-08-2005, 10:12 AM

funny/sad stuff

VeriSexy · 08-08-2005, 11:01 AM

LMAO, talk about a crappy joke

BuggyG · 08-08-2005, 11:29 AM

ok.. so it took him 2 WEEKS to realize it was time to call for help about it??? hehehehe

mardigras · 08-08-2005, 12:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BuggyG

ok.. so it took him 2 WEEKS to realize it was time to call for help about it??? hehehehe

Hopefully it choked all of those little spermatzoa to death

Dalai lama · 08-08-2005, 12:45 PM

wtf... it took him 2 weeks to call for help

Hollywood Horwitz · 08-08-2005, 12:55 PM

he should have told his friends to stop jocking his nutz..

Stallion · 08-08-2005, 01:10 PM

Damn that would have to suck... lol

BuggyG · 08-08-2005, 02:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mardigras

Hopefully it choked all of those little spermatzoa to death

ROFL!!
spermatoza... haven't heard that term since biology class back in highschool
exact same way the teacher would say it

damn.. brings back memories!!

Skillz Unlimited · 08-08-2005, 03:51 PM

ok first off unless it's a chic, his friends are gay. Secondly, why did it take two weeks. Maybe it was a typo and they meant two days. If it took two weeks to get off, we need to dig further than just the padlock, we need to analyze this guys brain! Something is reaaalllyyy wrong.

JuiceMonkey · 08-08-2005, 03:55 PM

ahahha
wow that would suck

08-05-2005, 08:37 PM	#2
Tom_PM Porn Meister Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 16,443	lmao, holy crap thats something else. __________________ 43-922-863 Shut up and play your guitar.

08-05-2005, 08:40 PM	#3
Spunky I need a beer Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: ♠ Toiletville ♠ Posts: 133,944	I would be very afraid of the bolt cutters __________________ *YOUR INFORMATION HERE*

08-05-2005, 10:35 PM	#5
TheDoc Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Currently Incognito Posts: 13,827	Hehe.. sounds like he might want to give up drinking __________________ ~TheDoc - ICQ7765825 It's all disambiguation

08-05-2005, 11:01 PM	#6
Evil1 Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2002 Posts: 3,893	none of my friends play with my seeds when im drunk.. he needs new friends __________________

08-06-2005, 12:01 AM	#8
Vitasoy GFY HALL OF FAME DAMMIT!!! Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 58,202	haha that is hilarious... poor guy __________________ [email protected]

08-05-2005, 10:22 PM	#4
iwantchixx Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: The Boonies Posts: 12,860	hehe, chastity for men? Sure sounds like it. I could never fuck with a padlock on my balls.

08-05-2005, 11:08 PM	#7
demented Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Cincinnati Ohio Posts: 2,388	What kind of friends play with your fucking balls while you're drunk passed out? "DUDE, lets put a padlock on his nuts! YEAH GOOD IDEA MAN!"

08-06-2005, 12:12 AM	#10
sicone Retired Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Sac Posts: 18,453	what kind of fucktard lets a friend put a pad lock on his nuts __________________

08-06-2005, 12:20 AM	#11
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08-06-2005, 01:43 AM	#13
bringer i have man boobies Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: van down by the river Posts: 13,082	poor locksmith __________________ 333-765-551

08-06-2005, 01:51 AM	#15
Sparks Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Southern CA Posts: 2,466	Ahahaha, that's terrible! Maybe his friends were just trying to tell him to quit drinking so much...

08-06-2005, 02:27 AM	#16
Antonio Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Spartaaaaaaaaa Posts: 14,136	with friends like this how long before he wakes up with a big fat cock up his ass?

08-06-2005, 02:31 AM	#17
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08-06-2005, 03:18 AM	#18
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08-06-2005, 04:12 AM	#20
Wiggles Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: May 2004 Posts: 14,423	haha fuck what a retard, he even asked someone to put it on haha __________________ no sig

08-06-2005, 04:36 AM	#21
Doc911 Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: If i was up your ass you'd know Posts: 3,695	lip lock = good pad lock = bad You got love friends that play with your nuts! __________________ For PHP/MySQL scripts ICQ 161480555 or email [email protected]

08-07-2005, 11:57 PM	#23
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08-08-2005, 12:24 AM	#24
mardigras Bon temps! Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: down yonder Posts: 14,194	How could he just walk around for 2 weeks before seeking help? He's about as stupid as his friend. May they have years of partying and playing with each other's nuts, they apparently are well matched __________________ .

08-08-2005, 12:45 AM	#25
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08-08-2005, 10:06 AM	#27
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08-08-2005, 10:09 AM	#28
El Duderino Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 835	so was it on his nuts for a day or 2 weeks?

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08-08-2005, 11:29 AM	#31
BuggyG Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Ottawa Posts: 4,179	ok.. so it took him 2 WEEKS to realize it was time to call for help about it??? hehehehe

08-08-2005, 12:45 PM	#33
Dalai lama Strength and Honor Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Europe Posts: 16,540	wtf... it took him 2 weeks to call for help __________________ A program you can trust. Gallerybooster Run multiply TGPs of 1 script

08-08-2005, 12:55 PM	#34
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08-08-2005, 01:10 PM	#35
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08-08-2005, 03:51 PM	#37
Skillz Unlimited Confirmed User Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Califor Posts: 1,541	ok first off unless it's a chic, his friends are gay. Secondly, why did it take two weeks. Maybe it was a typo and they meant two days. If it took two weeks to get off, we need to dig further than just the padlock, we need to analyze this guys brain! Something is reaaalllyyy wrong.

08-08-2005, 03:55 PM	#38
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