9 Things I Hate About Everyone - GoFuckYourself.com

Loryn · 05-09-2005, 12:09 PM

Perfect Monday morning humor!

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2. People who are willing to get off their butt to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too," Damn right! What good is a cake if you can't eat it?

4. When people say "it's always the last place you look," Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?

5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damned floor.

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.

8. When people say "life is short," What the hey?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here?

Meta Ridley · 05-09-2005, 12:10 PM

Hhaha good stuff.

I fucking hate everyone.

psili · 05-09-2005, 12:12 PM

Adam Sandler, right?

pornguy · 05-09-2005, 12:14 PM

Now you know why people do not like me, Thos are the type of answers I give when people do that shit to me.

MichaelP · 05-09-2005, 12:19 PM

Good stuff

I love #4

Loryn · 05-09-2005, 12:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by psili

Adam Sandler, right?

I do not know it was sent to me and of course I always share!

Manowar · 05-09-2005, 12:23 PM

LeDeN · 05-09-2005, 12:24 PM

#4 is good ;)

SmokeyTheBear · 05-09-2005, 12:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Loryn-Adult.com

Perfect Monday morning humor!

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

Actually , people do seem to forget they have a watch when you ask them .. And men grab their belts when they have to take a leak , or they shake an imaginary penis when asking other where they can take a piss.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Loryn-Adult.com

2. People who are willing to get off their butt to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

The damn buttons dont work on the t.v. or are even harder to find than the remote

Quote:

Originally Posted by Loryn-Adult.com

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too," Damn right! What good is a cake if you can't eat it?

I always tell them if they dont shut up i will eat my cake and your cake..

Quote:

Originally Posted by Loryn-Adult.com

4. When people say "it's always the last place you look," Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?

haha i say that , i'm going to have to remember that next time someone says that . Good roast

Quote:

Originally Posted by Loryn-Adult.com

5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damned floor.

I punch anyone who says anything, unless its my girlfriend asking to breathe.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Loryn-Adult.com

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

I always say " It doesn't appear so. "

Quote:

Originally Posted by Loryn-Adult.com

7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.

Lets sue them

Quote:

Originally Posted by Loryn-Adult.com

8. When people say "life is short," What the hey?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

Death

Quote:

Originally Posted by Loryn-Adult.com

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here?

Do people actually ask that ? They must be referring to another bus, or assume your not waiting for the bus.

seeric · 05-09-2005, 12:32 PM

yeah, those are good.

LiveDose · 05-09-2005, 12:40 PM

Good stuff...lol

Homer · 05-09-2005, 12:44 PM

nice jokes

Head · 05-09-2005, 12:48 PM

SykkBoy · 05-09-2005, 12:49 PM

you forgot:
People who come over and press the elevator button that you've obviously already pressed (the light is on, you're waiting there patiently).
"Yeah, thanks Slappy, I didn't push the button the right way. Thanks for the save, fuckface"

axelcat · 05-09-2005, 12:51 PM

Raven · 05-09-2005, 12:55 PM

Perfect Monday for a laugh, Loryn...thanks!

gecko · 05-09-2005, 01:46 PM

LoL those are great

Sarah_Jayne · 05-09-2005, 02:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Loryn-Adult.com

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too," Damn right! What good is a cake if you can't eat it?

um, might be missing the point of that one, huh?

Vitasoy · 05-09-2005, 02:05 PM

haha some of those are great.

Sarah_Jayne · 05-09-2005, 02:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SykkBoy2

you forgot:
People who come over and press the elevator button that you've obviously already pressed (the light is on, you're waiting there patiently).
"Yeah, thanks Slappy, I didn't push the button the right way. Thanks for the save, fuckface"

I will group those people in with the people that look at a huge line for one of two ATMS because the other ATM is obviously not working but yet go right up it whilst looking at everyone else in line like they must have not noticed there are two.

myjah · 05-09-2005, 02:10 PM

HAHA, I am the worst for #6. I'm always catching myself doing that but I can't seem to stop.

Tala · 05-09-2005, 02:14 PM

Love this list.

Skillz Unlimited · 05-09-2005, 03:08 PM

Quote:

you forgot:People who come over and press the elevator button that you've obviously already pressed (the light is on, you're waiting there patiently).
"Yeah, thanks Slappy, I didn't push the button the right way. Thanks for the save, fuckface"

lmao! Fucking classic. I see that all the time and think pretty much the same thing.

Entropy · 05-09-2005, 03:18 PM

Just_Dave · 05-09-2005, 03:22 PM

those are funny

MandyBlake · 05-09-2005, 03:24 PM

lol you sounds like george carlin.

HpicAnn · 05-09-2005, 03:27 PM

This was good....

Loryn · 05-09-2005, 04:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SmokeyTheBear

Death

WOW good answer. Kinda fucking creepy though! That was my favorite one, out of all nine, but when you said that it made me sad!

Honez · 05-09-2005, 04:43 PM

haha, thanks for the giggles

tony286 · 05-09-2005, 04:43 PM

very funny

Drake · 05-09-2005, 04:53 PM

I like that kind of humor LOL

wedouglas · 05-09-2005, 04:58 PM

new and improved...well 'new' refers to the version and 'improved' is self explanitory

nico-t · 05-09-2005, 05:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SmokeyTheBear

I punch anyone who says anything, unless its my girlfriend asking to breathe.

SmokeyTheBear · 05-09-2005, 05:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Loryn-Adult.com

WOW good answer. Kinda fucking creepy though! That was my favorite one, out of all nine, but when you said that it made me sad!

me too for some reason.. i had to stop at that point and reflect

bangman · 05-09-2005, 05:21 PM

That's from one of George Carlin's books, right? Brain Droppings I think.
Awesome book and awesome list.

SmokeyTheBear · 05-09-2005, 05:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Loryn-Adult.com

WOW good answer. Kinda fucking creepy though! That was my favorite one, out of all nine, but when you said that it made me sad!

Its actually a quote from a "NO FEAR" t-shirt..

"Life is short..... but your dead for so long" or something to that effect..

They have a bunch of shirts like that

Spunky · 05-09-2005, 05:24 PM

2. People who are willing to get off their butt to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

Sounds like me to a T

Loryn · 05-09-2005, 05:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SmokeyTheBear

Its actually a quote from a "NO FEAR" t-shirt..

"Life is short..... but your dead for so long" or something to that effect..

They have a bunch of shirts like that

10,000 years would be okay for me. That way I could live long enough to see some long term processes and get a better understanding of what it is about. Reading? There is just too much to read in such a short time. I wouldn't be able to enjoy the little time I have! haha

The Bastards!

reynold · 05-09-2005, 11:44 PM

I can clearly say that you are a logical person.

nice contribution!

baddog · 05-10-2005, 12:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Loryn-Adult.com

Perfect Monday morning humor!

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

I do .

VeriSexy · 05-10-2005, 12:13 AM

Quit bitching..........

baddog · 05-10-2005, 12:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sarah_webinc

I will group those people in with the people that look at a huge line for one of two ATMS because the other ATM is obviously not working but yet go right up it whilst looking at everyone else in line like they must have not noticed there are two.

98.3% of the people in said line did the exact same thing.

baddog · 05-10-2005, 12:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SmokeyTheBear

Its actually a quote from a "NO FEAR" t-shirt..

"Life is short..... but your dead for so long" or something to that effect..

They have a bunch of shirts like that

I used to be friends with the brother of the guy that came up with the NO FEAR line. As I recall he was also behind the Oakley Factory Test Pilot line as well.

He made so very nice cash off a couple catchy phrases.

woj · 05-10-2005, 12:29 AM

good stuff

Sarah_Jayne · 05-10-2005, 03:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by baddog

98.3% of the people in said line did the exact same thing.

could we add people that make up statistics to the list? J/k ;)

I can't remember if it is the case in the US or not but here the ATMs tend to have red and green bar next to them that says if they work or not. You can see that from a fair distance...maybe it is just the colour blind who go up.

Rorschach · 05-10-2005, 04:56 AM

i hate stupid blonde sluts who think they worth something

hova · 05-10-2005, 05:00 AM

very funny

Cassie · 05-10-2005, 05:57 AM

hahaha these are good.

05-09-2005, 12:09 PM	#1
Loryn Super Connector Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Las Vegas Posts: 12,853	9 Things I Hate About Everyone Perfect Monday morning humor! 1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is? 2. People who are willing to get off their butt to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually. 3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too," Damn right! What good is a cake if you can't eat it? 4. When people say "it's always the last place you look," Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? 5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damned floor. 6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine? 7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it. 8. When people say "life is short," What the hey?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer? 9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here? __________________ ~ loryn@loryntaylor . com ~ RIP TD

05-09-2005, 12:10 PM	#2
Meta Ridley Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: The land of ruleface and kickass Posts: 3,433	Hhaha good stuff. I fucking hate everyone. __________________ [email protected]

05-09-2005, 12:12 PM	#3
psili Confirmed User Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Loveland, CO Posts: 5,526	Adam Sandler, right? __________________ Your post count means nothing.

05-09-2005, 12:24 PM	#8
LeDeN Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Bulgaria Posts: 147	#4 is good ;) __________________ SIG TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, then you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60.

05-09-2005, 12:44 PM	#12
Homer Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 6,780	nice jokes __________________

05-09-2005, 12:14 PM	#4
pornguy Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Homeless Posts: 62,911	Now you know why people do not like me, Thos are the type of answers I give when people do that shit to me. __________________ PornGuy skype me pornguy_epic AmateurDough The Hottes Shemales online! TChicks.com \| Angeles Cid \| Mariana Cordoba \| MAILERS WELCOME!

05-09-2005, 12:19 PM	#5
MichaelP Registered User Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: QWEBEC Corporate Office Posts: 7,124	Good stuff I love #4

05-09-2005, 12:23 PM	#7
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05-09-2005, 12:32 PM	#10
seeric .......... Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: .......... Posts: 41,917	yeah, those are good.

05-09-2005, 12:40 PM	#11
LiveDose Show Yer Tits! Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Somewhere Out there... Posts: 25,792	Good stuff...lol

05-09-2005, 12:48 PM	#13
Head Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Starship Enterprise Posts: 8,278	__________________

05-09-2005, 12:49 PM	#14
SykkBoy Jesus loves bacon Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Sin City, Motherfucker Posts: 19,969	you forgot: People who come over and press the elevator button that you've obviously already pressed (the light is on, you're waiting there patiently). "Yeah, thanks Slappy, I didn't push the button the right way. Thanks for the save, fuckface" __________________ Support my new movie “The Second Coming”

05-09-2005, 12:51 PM	#15
axelcat Adult Locals Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: West Coast Posts: 25,450

05-09-2005, 12:55 PM	#16
Raven Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2001 Posts: 6,874	Perfect Monday for a laugh, Loryn...thanks! __________________ Raven ~RETIRED~

05-09-2005, 01:46 PM	#17
gecko ****** Join Date: Jun 2002 Posts: 21,846	LoL those are great __________________ [email protected]

05-09-2005, 02:05 PM	#19
Vitasoy GFY HALL OF FAME DAMMIT!!! Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 58,202	haha some of those are great. __________________ [email protected]

05-09-2005, 02:10 PM	#21
myjah Back in the harbor Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 11,482	HAHA, I am the worst for #6. I'm always catching myself doing that but I can't seem to stop. __________________ VP of Marketing AVN Media Network Skype: AVNJill [email protected]

05-09-2005, 02:14 PM	#22
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05-09-2005, 03:22 PM	#25
Just_Dave Its almost time Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2002 Posts: 13,009	those are funny

05-09-2005, 03:24 PM	#26
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05-09-2005, 03:27 PM	#27
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05-09-2005, 04:43 PM	#29
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05-09-2005, 04:43 PM	#30
tony286 lurker Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: atlanta Posts: 57,021	very funny

05-09-2005, 04:53 PM	#31
Drake Hello world! Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 12,508	I like that kind of humor LOL

05-09-2005, 04:58 PM	#32
wedouglas So Fucking Banned Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Dearborn, MI Posts: 5,921	new and improved...well 'new' refers to the version and 'improved' is self explanitory

05-09-2005, 05:21 PM	#35
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05-09-2005, 05:24 PM	#37
Spunky I need a beer Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: ♠ Toiletville ♠ Posts: 133,943	2. People who are willing to get off their butt to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually. Sounds like me to a T __________________ *YOUR INFORMATION HERE*

05-09-2005, 11:44 PM	#39
reynold Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Global Traveler Posts: 51,271	I can clearly say that you are a logical person. nice contribution!

05-10-2005, 12:13 AM	#41
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05-10-2005, 12:29 AM	#44
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05-10-2005, 04:56 AM	#46
Rorschach So Fucking Banned Join Date: Aug 2002 Posts: 5,579	i hate stupid blonde sluts who think they worth something

05-10-2005, 05:00 AM	#47
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05-10-2005, 05:57 AM	#48
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