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Discuss what's fucking going on, and which programs are best and worst. One-time "program" announcements from "established" webmasters are allowed. |
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#1 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Hard Link Trades Always Wanted Icq: 319323350
Posts: 1,155
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Like To Piss people Off??? Use Some Of These
Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
Make beeping noises when a large person backs up. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage." Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeeep Bip..." If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets. Sniffle incessantly. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think." Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace." Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot." Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy." Wear a special hip holster for your remote control. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears. Give a play-by-play account of a persons every action in a nasal Howard Cosell voice. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way." Ask 1-800 operators for dates. Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copyright warnings. Sew anti-theft detector strips into peoples backpacks. Check out a novel from the library and write the surprise ending on its first page. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon. Dress only in clothes colored Hunters Orange. Change channels five minutes before the end of every show. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register. Pay for your dinner with pennies. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes. Repeat everything someone says, as a question. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now." Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks. As much as possible, skip rather than walk. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat. Ask people what gender they are. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back in the tray. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.. Change your name to "John Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book, claim its a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a." Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down. Chew on pens that you've borrowed |
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#2 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Port St. Lucie, Florida
Posts: 5,162
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#3 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: I'm everywhere Bitches!!
Posts: 1,656
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#4 |
Too lazy to set a custom title
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Buffalo, NY
Posts: 35,218
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Awesome list i've used many of these many times...
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#5 | |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Hard Link Trades Always Wanted Icq: 319323350
Posts: 1,155
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#6 | |
Doing the grind since 99
Industry Role:
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Buffalo NY
Posts: 16,881
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Quote:
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Living in Virtual Reality Contact: Email (preferred): furiousmale .at. gmail - Skype: live:shanedws |
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#7 | |
Die With Your Boots On
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Hawaii
Posts: 22,872
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#8 |
I am a meat popsicle.
Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 25,100
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These would be funnier if I were in junior high but I guess this one did make me laugh.
"Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down."
__________________
HIGHEST PAYOUTS FOR NO-CONSOLE TOURS IN THE ENTIRE INDUSTRY! THIS SIG CAN BE YOURS FOR $200 - ICQ: 78881543 |
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#9 | |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Hard Link Trades Always Wanted Icq: 319323350
Posts: 1,155
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#10 | |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Valencia, CA
Posts: 2,906
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Quote:
These two had my in tears! ![]() |
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#11 | |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Port St. Lucie, Florida
Posts: 5,162
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Quote:
LOL those are my favorites.... imma do the hairdryer one tomarrow standing next to my friends white caprice ![]() |
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#12 |
I need a beer
![]() Industry Role:
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: ♠ Toiletville ♠
Posts: 133,943
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#13 | |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Hard Link Trades Always Wanted Icq: 319323350
Posts: 1,155
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#14 | |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Hard Link Trades Always Wanted Icq: 319323350
Posts: 1,155
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#15 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Australia
Posts: 4,667
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![]() ![]() Some funny shit there. |
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#16 |
GFY HALL OF FAME DAMMIT!!!
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 58,202
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Some of those are great.
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#17 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: The Buck Starts Here
Posts: 5,779
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Gee...half of those describe my husband.....he is to say the least very amusing.
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#18 | |
Text Writer
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 18,812
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#19 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Hard Link Trades Always Wanted Icq: 319323350
Posts: 1,155
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i love this shit...... bump for the night shift
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#20 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Deep inside my mind
Posts: 1,118
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Here's my favorite...
When you are the passenger in a car and the driver is backing up, slap your hand on your door panel and yell out "oh shit!". |
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#21 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: AZ
Posts: 2,037
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![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Nice!! ![]()
__________________
ya ya, I'll fill this in later... |
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#22 |
jellyfish
![]() ![]() Join Date: Dec 2003
Posts: 71,528
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the lego brick one really pissed me off as a kid
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#23 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Scotland
Posts: 6,720
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Very good list
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#24 |
Hello world!
Industry Role:
Join Date: Mar 2003
Posts: 12,508
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hahaha we're all guilty of many of those
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#25 |
Too lazy to set a custom title
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Writer for hire :) Gallery descriptions, articles, blog posts etc. ICQ: 209 356 106
Posts: 12,117
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some nice ones
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__________________
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3 & 5mins FLVs | RSS & Tube Feeds | Matching Thumbs | FLV Browser & Exporter | No Prechecked Xsales >> Mobile Redirection Script: mobile.vidz.com also paying 80% net Lifetime << ICQ: 198-394-557 ![]() |
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#26 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: nofx, florida
Posts: 1,012
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LMAO good shit
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