Priest and a Rabbi (Joke) - GoFuckYourself.com

webmaster x · 08-25-2004, 12:15 AM

NOTE: Joke may or may not be old, I just found it funny. So a big "SORRY" to the geniuses who, sheep-like, will invariably post "Post Timeline Here"

Priest & Rabbi
A priest and a rabbi are sitting next to each other on an airplane. After a while the priest turns to the rabbi and asks, "Is it still a requirement of your faith that you not eat pork?"

The rabbi responds, "Yes, that is still one of our beliefs."

The priest then asks, "Have you ever eaten pork?"

To which the rabbi replies, "Yes, on one occasion I did succumb to temptation, and tasted a ham sandwich."

The priest nodded in understanding and went on with his reading.

A while later, the rabbi spoke up and asked the priest, "Father, is it still a requirement of your church that you remain celibate?"

The priest replied, "Yes, that is still very much a part of our faith."

The rabbi then asked him, "Father, have you ever fallen to the temptations of the flesh?"

The priest replied, "Yes, rabbi, on one occasion I was weak, and broke with my faith."

The rabbi nodded understandingly. He was silent for about five minutes, and then he said, "Beats the hell out of a ham sandwich, doesn't it?"

ytcracker · 08-25-2004, 12:28 AM

hahahaa not bad

RedShoe · 08-25-2004, 12:34 AM

it was new to me.

margarita · 08-25-2004, 12:38 AM

webmaster x · 08-25-2004, 04:11 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by margarita

TweetyBird · 08-25-2004, 04:18 AM

hehe

woj · 08-25-2004, 04:23 AM

heh heh

pure energy · 08-25-2004, 04:24 AM

Good joke it nearly makes me laugh

Oncle_Benny · 08-25-2004, 05:38 AM

webmaster x · 08-25-2004, 07:30 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by pure energy
Good joke it nearly makes me laugh

okay

fr8 · 08-25-2004, 08:38 PM

I was expecting something different but that was pretty good.

wdsguy · 08-25-2004, 08:39 PM

Illicit · 08-25-2004, 08:40 PM

good one ! hadnt heard it b4

Screaming · 08-25-2004, 08:41 PM

Fake Nick · 08-25-2004, 08:43 PM

longer and better

A bright, young, fresh-out-of-school auditor just joined the IRS, excited to begin tracking down high-powered offenders-just as the Enron or Anxious for his first high-powered audit, he was a bit dismayed when is assignment was to audit a Rabbi.
Looking over the books and taxes were pretty straight forward, and the Rabbi clearly very frugal, so he thought he'd make his day interesting by having a little fun with the Rabbi.

"Rabbi," he said, "I noticed that you buy a lot of candles."

"Yes," answered the Rabbi.

"Well, Rabbi, what do you do with the candle drippings?" he asked.

"A good question," noted the Rabbi. "We actually save them up and when we have enough, we send them back to the candle maker. And every now and then, they send us a free box of candles."

"Oh," replied the auditor somewhat disappointed that his unusual question actually had a practical answer. So he thought he'd go on, in his obnoxious way...

"Rabbi, what about all these matzo purchases? What do you do with the crumbs from the matzo?"

"Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi calmly, "we actually collect up all the crumbs from the matzo and when we have enough, we send them in a box back to the manufacturer and every now and then, they send a box of matzo balls."

"Oh," replied the auditor, thinking hard how to fluster the Rabbi.

"Well, Rabbi," he went on, "what do you do with all the foreskins from the circumcisions?"

"Yes, here too, we do not waste," answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save up all the foreskins, and when we have enough we actually send them to the I.R.S."

"The I.R.S.?," questioned the auditor in disbelief.

"Ahh, yes," replied the Rabbi, "the I.R.S. ...and about once a year, they send us a little prick like you."

webmaster x · 08-26-2004, 03:44 AM

That's pretty good LOL

Quote:

Originally posted by Fake Nick
longer and better

A bright, young, fresh-out-of-school auditor just joined the IRS, excited to begin tracking down high-powered offenders-just as the Enron or Anxious for his first high-powered audit, he was a bit dismayed when is assignment was to audit a Rabbi.
Looking over the books and taxes were pretty straight forward, and the Rabbi clearly very frugal, so he thought he'd make his day interesting by having a little fun with the Rabbi.

"Rabbi," he said, "I noticed that you buy a lot of candles."

"Yes," answered the Rabbi.

"Well, Rabbi, what do you do with the candle drippings?" he asked.

"A good question," noted the Rabbi. "We actually save them up and when we have enough, we send them back to the candle maker. And every now and then, they send us a free box of candles."

"Oh," replied the auditor somewhat disappointed that his unusual question actually had a practical answer. So he thought he'd go on, in his obnoxious way...

"Rabbi, what about all these matzo purchases? What do you do with the crumbs from the matzo?"

"Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi calmly, "we actually collect up all the crumbs from the matzo and when we have enough, we send them in a box back to the manufacturer and every now and then, they send a box of matzo balls."

"Oh," replied the auditor, thinking hard how to fluster the Rabbi.

"Well, Rabbi," he went on, "what do you do with all the foreskins from the circumcisions?"

"Yes, here too, we do not waste," answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save up all the foreskins, and when we have enough we actually send them to the I.R.S."

"The I.R.S.?," questioned the auditor in disbelief.

"Ahh, yes," replied the Rabbi, "the I.R.S. ...and about once a year, they send us a little prick like you."

Flashasianxxxoutsourcing · 08-26-2004, 08:42 AM

thats was fuckin hilarious

webmaster x · 08-26-2004, 05:45 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Flashasianxxxoutsourcing
thats was fuckin hilarious

Hi Flash, are you guys the same company as xxxoutsourcing?

Doctor Dre · 08-26-2004, 06:08 PM

DUUUUUUh :P

Floridiot · 08-26-2004, 06:11 PM

fr8 · 08-26-2004, 06:30 PM

rolf! That second was alot better than the first one.

webmaster x · 08-26-2004, 07:05 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by fr8
rolf! That second was alot better than the first one.

It was more edgier

AliciaK · 08-26-2004, 07:09 PM

Both were funny, thanks for the laugh!

kmanrox · 08-26-2004, 07:13 PM

good jokes!

sickkittens · 08-26-2004, 07:19 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fake Nick
longer and better

A bright, young, fresh-out-of-school auditor just joined the IRS, excited to begin tracking down high-powered offenders-just as the Enron or Anxious for his first high-powered audit, he was a bit dismayed when is assignment was to audit a Rabbi.
Looking over the books and taxes were pretty straight forward, and the Rabbi clearly very frugal, so he thought he'd make his day interesting by having a little fun with the Rabbi.

"Rabbi," he said, "I noticed that you buy a lot of candles."

"Yes," answered the Rabbi.

"Well, Rabbi, what do you do with the candle drippings?" he asked.

"A good question," noted the Rabbi. "We actually save them up and when we have enough, we send them back to the candle maker. And every now and then, they send us a free box of candles."

"Oh," replied the auditor somewhat disappointed that his unusual question actually had a practical answer. So he thought he'd go on, in his obnoxious way...

"Rabbi, what about all these matzo purchases? What do you do with the crumbs from the matzo?"

"Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi calmly, "we actually collect up all the crumbs from the matzo and when we have enough, we send them in a box back to the manufacturer and every now and then, they send a box of matzo balls."

"Oh," replied the auditor, thinking hard how to fluster the Rabbi.

"Well, Rabbi," he went on, "what do you do with all the foreskins from the circumcisions?"

"Yes, here too, we do not waste," answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save up all the foreskins, and when we have enough we actually send them to the I.R.S."

"The I.R.S.?," questioned the auditor in disbelief.

"Ahh, yes," replied the Rabbi, "the I.R.S. ...and about once a year, they send us a little prick like you."

Silly but still kinda funny.

BlueDesignStudios · 08-26-2004, 07:26 PM

reynold · 08-26-2004, 10:28 PM

thanks i needed that boost... at least i smiled

08-25-2004, 12:15 AM	#1
webmaster x Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2004 Posts: 4,400	Priest and a Rabbi (Joke) NOTE: Joke may or may not be old, I just found it funny. So a big "SORRY" to the geniuses who, sheep-like, will invariably post "Post Timeline Here" Priest & Rabbi A priest and a rabbi are sitting next to each other on an airplane. After a while the priest turns to the rabbi and asks, "Is it still a requirement of your faith that you not eat pork?" The rabbi responds, "Yes, that is still one of our beliefs." The priest then asks, "Have you ever eaten pork?" To which the rabbi replies, "Yes, on one occasion I did succumb to temptation, and tasted a ham sandwich." The priest nodded in understanding and went on with his reading. A while later, the rabbi spoke up and asked the priest, "Father, is it still a requirement of your church that you remain celibate?" The priest replied, "Yes, that is still very much a part of our faith." The rabbi then asked him, "Father, have you ever fallen to the temptations of the flesh?" The priest replied, "Yes, rabbi, on one occasion I was weak, and broke with my faith." The rabbi nodded understandingly. He was silent for about five minutes, and then he said, "Beats the hell out of a ham sandwich, doesn't it?" __________________ Click 9500 FHG Text Descriptions--Only $89!

08-25-2004, 12:28 AM	#2
ytcracker stc is the greatest Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: rip sean murray Posts: 12,403	hahahaa not bad __________________ www.ytcracker.com \| www.digitalgangster.com i love you

08-25-2004, 12:34 AM	#3
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08-25-2004, 04:23 AM	#7
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08-25-2004, 04:24 AM	#8
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08-25-2004, 08:38 PM	#11
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08-25-2004, 08:39 PM	#12
wdsguy Ryde or Die Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: California-Shanghai Posts: 19,568	lol

08-25-2004, 08:40 PM	#13
Illicit wtf ? Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: GFY Posts: 11,895	good one ! hadnt heard it b4 __________________ Insert Sig Here

08-25-2004, 08:41 PM	#14
Screaming I can change this!!!!! Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 18,972	__________________

08-25-2004, 08:43 PM	#15
Fake Nick So Fucking Banned Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: go troll goo! Posts: 7,708	longer and better A bright, young, fresh-out-of-school auditor just joined the IRS, excited to begin tracking down high-powered offenders-just as the Enron or Anxious for his first high-powered audit, he was a bit dismayed when is assignment was to audit a Rabbi. Looking over the books and taxes were pretty straight forward, and the Rabbi clearly very frugal, so he thought he'd make his day interesting by having a little fun with the Rabbi. "Rabbi," he said, "I noticed that you buy a lot of candles." "Yes," answered the Rabbi. "Well, Rabbi, what do you do with the candle drippings?" he asked. "A good question," noted the Rabbi. "We actually save them up and when we have enough, we send them back to the candle maker. And every now and then, they send us a free box of candles." "Oh," replied the auditor somewhat disappointed that his unusual question actually had a practical answer. So he thought he'd go on, in his obnoxious way... "Rabbi, what about all these matzo purchases? What do you do with the crumbs from the matzo?" "Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi calmly, "we actually collect up all the crumbs from the matzo and when we have enough, we send them in a box back to the manufacturer and every now and then, they send a box of matzo balls." "Oh," replied the auditor, thinking hard how to fluster the Rabbi. "Well, Rabbi," he went on, "what do you do with all the foreskins from the circumcisions?" "Yes, here too, we do not waste," answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save up all the foreskins, and when we have enough we actually send them to the I.R.S." "The I.R.S.?," questioned the auditor in disbelief. "Ahh, yes," replied the Rabbi, "the I.R.S. ...and about once a year, they send us a little prick like you."

08-26-2004, 08:42 AM	#17
Flashasianxxxoutsourcing Registered User Join Date: Aug 2004 Posts: 82	thats was fuckin hilarious __________________ 257921047 [email protected]

08-26-2004, 06:11 PM	#20
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08-26-2004, 06:30 PM	#21
fr8 Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 5,074	rolf! That second was alot better than the first one. __________________ █ joesmut (a) gmail Dot com █ Full Stack Developer

08-26-2004, 07:09 PM	#23
AliciaK Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Central Florida Posts: 150	Both were funny, thanks for the laugh!

08-26-2004, 07:13 PM	#24
kmanrox aka K-Man Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: The Gutter Posts: 29,292	good jokes!

08-26-2004, 07:26 PM	#26
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08-26-2004, 10:28 PM	#27
reynold Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Global Traveler Posts: 51,271	thanks i needed that boost... at least i smiled