Priest and a Rabbi (Joke)

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  • webmaster x
    Confirmed User
    • Mar 2004
    • 4400
    #1

    Priest and a Rabbi (Joke)

    NOTE: Joke may or may not be old, I just found it funny. So a big "SORRY" to the geniuses who, sheep-like, will invariably post "Post Timeline Here"



    Priest & Rabbi
    A priest and a rabbi are sitting next to each other on an airplane. After a while the priest turns to the rabbi and asks, "Is it still a requirement of your faith that you not eat pork?"

    The rabbi responds, "Yes, that is still one of our beliefs."

    The priest then asks, "Have you ever eaten pork?"

    To which the rabbi replies, "Yes, on one occasion I did succumb to temptation, and tasted a ham sandwich."

    The priest nodded in understanding and went on with his reading.

    A while later, the rabbi spoke up and asked the priest, "Father, is it still a requirement of your church that you remain celibate?"

    The priest replied, "Yes, that is still very much a part of our faith."

    The rabbi then asked him, "Father, have you ever fallen to the temptations of the flesh?"

    The priest replied, "Yes, rabbi, on one occasion I was weak, and broke with my faith."

    The rabbi nodded understandingly. He was silent for about five minutes, and then he said, "Beats the hell out of a ham sandwich, doesn't it?"
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    Tags: None
    • ytcracker
      stc is the greatest
      • Dec 2002
      • 12403
      #2
      hahahaa not bad
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        Comment

        • RedShoe
          赤い靴 call me 202-456-1111
          • Feb 2001
          • 14831
          #3
          it was new to me.

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            • margarita
              Confirmed User
              • Jun 2003
              • 917
              #4
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                • webmaster x
                  Confirmed User
                  • Mar 2004
                  • 4400
                  #5
                  Originally posted by margarita
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                    Comment

                    • TweetyBird
                      Confirmed User
                      • Feb 2004
                      • 8532
                      #6
                      hehe
                      sig for sale.
                      ICQ :338213644

                        Comment

                        • woj
                          <&(©¿©)&>
                          • Jul 2002
                          • 47880
                          #7
                          heh heh
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                            • pure energy
                              Confirmed User
                              • Apr 2004
                              • 4274
                              #8
                              Good joke it nearly makes me laugh
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                                • Oncle_Benny
                                  Confirmed User
                                  • Mar 2004
                                  • 1595
                                  #9

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                                    Comment

                                    • webmaster x
                                      Confirmed User
                                      • Mar 2004
                                      • 4400
                                      #10
                                      Originally posted by pure energy
                                      Good joke it nearly makes me laugh
                                      okay
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                                        Comment

                                        • fr8
                                          Confirmed User
                                          • Mar 2003
                                          • 5074
                                          #11
                                          I was expecting something different but that was pretty good.
                                          █ joesmut (a) gmail Dot com
                                          █ Full Stack Developer

                                            Comment

                                            • wdsguy
                                              Ryde or Die
                                              • Dec 2002
                                              • 19568
                                              #12
                                              lol

                                                Comment

                                                • Illicit
                                                  wtf ?
                                                  • Dec 2003
                                                  • 11895
                                                  #13
                                                  good one ! hadnt heard it b4
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                                                    Comment

                                                    • Screaming
                                                      I can change this!!!!!
                                                      • Feb 2004
                                                      • 18972
                                                      #14

                                                        Comment

                                                        • Fake Nick
                                                          So Fucking Banned
                                                          • Jul 2004
                                                          • 7708
                                                          #15
                                                          longer and better

                                                          A bright, young, fresh-out-of-school auditor just joined the IRS, excited to begin tracking down high-powered offenders-just as the Enron or Anxious for his first high-powered audit, he was a bit dismayed when is assignment was to audit a Rabbi.
                                                          Looking over the books and taxes were pretty straight forward, and the Rabbi clearly very frugal, so he thought he'd make his day interesting by having a little fun with the Rabbi.

                                                          "Rabbi," he said, "I noticed that you buy a lot of candles."

                                                          "Yes," answered the Rabbi.

                                                          "Well, Rabbi, what do you do with the candle drippings?" he asked.

                                                          "A good question," noted the Rabbi. "We actually save them up and when we have enough, we send them back to the candle maker. And every now and then, they send us a free box of candles."

                                                          "Oh," replied the auditor somewhat disappointed that his unusual question actually had a practical answer. So he thought he'd go on, in his obnoxious way...

                                                          "Rabbi, what about all these matzo purchases? What do you do with the crumbs from the matzo?"

                                                          "Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi calmly, "we actually collect up all the crumbs from the matzo and when we have enough, we send them in a box back to the manufacturer and every now and then, they send a box of matzo balls."

                                                          "Oh," replied the auditor, thinking hard how to fluster the Rabbi.

                                                          "Well, Rabbi," he went on, "what do you do with all the foreskins from the circumcisions?"

                                                          "Yes, here too, we do not waste," answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save up all the foreskins, and when we have enough we actually send them to the I.R.S."

                                                          "The I.R.S.?," questioned the auditor in disbelief.

                                                          "Ahh, yes," replied the Rabbi, "the I.R.S. ...and about once a year, they send us a little prick like you."

                                                            Comment

                                                            • webmaster x
                                                              Confirmed User
                                                              • Mar 2004
                                                              • 4400
                                                              #16
                                                              That's pretty good LOL


                                                              Originally posted by Fake Nick
                                                              longer and better

                                                              A bright, young, fresh-out-of-school auditor just joined the IRS, excited to begin tracking down high-powered offenders-just as the Enron or Anxious for his first high-powered audit, he was a bit dismayed when is assignment was to audit a Rabbi.
                                                              Looking over the books and taxes were pretty straight forward, and the Rabbi clearly very frugal, so he thought he'd make his day interesting by having a little fun with the Rabbi.

                                                              "Rabbi," he said, "I noticed that you buy a lot of candles."

                                                              "Yes," answered the Rabbi.

                                                              "Well, Rabbi, what do you do with the candle drippings?" he asked.

                                                              "A good question," noted the Rabbi. "We actually save them up and when we have enough, we send them back to the candle maker. And every now and then, they send us a free box of candles."

                                                              "Oh," replied the auditor somewhat disappointed that his unusual question actually had a practical answer. So he thought he'd go on, in his obnoxious way...

                                                              "Rabbi, what about all these matzo purchases? What do you do with the crumbs from the matzo?"

                                                              "Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi calmly, "we actually collect up all the crumbs from the matzo and when we have enough, we send them in a box back to the manufacturer and every now and then, they send a box of matzo balls."

                                                              "Oh," replied the auditor, thinking hard how to fluster the Rabbi.

                                                              "Well, Rabbi," he went on, "what do you do with all the foreskins from the circumcisions?"

                                                              "Yes, here too, we do not waste," answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save up all the foreskins, and when we have enough we actually send them to the I.R.S."

                                                              "The I.R.S.?," questioned the auditor in disbelief.

                                                              "Ahh, yes," replied the Rabbi, "the I.R.S. ...and about once a year, they send us a little prick like you."
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                                                                Comment

                                                                • Flashasianxxxoutsourcing
                                                                  Registered User
                                                                  • Aug 2004
                                                                  • 82
                                                                  #17
                                                                  thats was fuckin hilarious
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                                                                  [email protected]

                                                                    Comment

                                                                    • webmaster x
                                                                      Confirmed User
                                                                      • Mar 2004
                                                                      • 4400
                                                                      #18
                                                                      Originally posted by Flashasianxxxoutsourcing
                                                                      thats was fuckin hilarious
                                                                      Hi Flash, are you guys the same company as xxxoutsourcing?
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                                                                        Comment

                                                                        • Doctor Dre
                                                                          Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                          • Jan 2001
                                                                          • 51692
                                                                          #19


                                                                          DUUUUUUh :P
                                                                          Originally posted by rayadp05
                                                                          I rebooted, deleted temp files, history, cookies and everything...still cannot view the news clip. All I see is that fucking gay ass music video from "Rick Roll". Anyone else have a different link to the news clip?

                                                                            Comment

                                                                            • Floridiot
                                                                              Confirmed User
                                                                              • Nov 2003
                                                                              • 1346
                                                                              #20


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                                                                                Comment

                                                                                • fr8
                                                                                  Confirmed User
                                                                                  • Mar 2003
                                                                                  • 5074
                                                                                  #21
                                                                                  rolf! That second was alot better than the first one.
                                                                                  █ joesmut (a) gmail Dot com
                                                                                  █ Full Stack Developer

                                                                                    Comment

                                                                                    • webmaster x
                                                                                      Confirmed User
                                                                                      • Mar 2004
                                                                                      • 4400
                                                                                      #22
                                                                                      Originally posted by fr8
                                                                                      rolf! That second was alot better than the first one.
                                                                                      It was more edgier
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                                                                                        Comment

                                                                                        • AliciaK
                                                                                          Confirmed User
                                                                                          • Feb 2004
                                                                                          • 150
                                                                                          #23
                                                                                          Both were funny, thanks for the laugh!

                                                                                            Comment

                                                                                            • kmanrox
                                                                                              aka K-Man
                                                                                              • Oct 2001
                                                                                              • 29295
                                                                                              #24
                                                                                              good jokes!
                                                                                              Crypto HODLr
                                                                                              Crypto mining
                                                                                              Angel investor

                                                                                                Comment

                                                                                                • sickkittens
                                                                                                  I am a meat popsicle.
                                                                                                  • Jul 2002
                                                                                                  • 25100
                                                                                                  #25
                                                                                                  Originally posted by Fake Nick
                                                                                                  longer and better

                                                                                                  A bright, young, fresh-out-of-school auditor just joined the IRS, excited to begin tracking down high-powered offenders-just as the Enron or Anxious for his first high-powered audit, he was a bit dismayed when is assignment was to audit a Rabbi.
                                                                                                  Looking over the books and taxes were pretty straight forward, and the Rabbi clearly very frugal, so he thought he'd make his day interesting by having a little fun with the Rabbi.

                                                                                                  "Rabbi," he said, "I noticed that you buy a lot of candles."

                                                                                                  "Yes," answered the Rabbi.

                                                                                                  "Well, Rabbi, what do you do with the candle drippings?" he asked.

                                                                                                  "A good question," noted the Rabbi. "We actually save them up and when we have enough, we send them back to the candle maker. And every now and then, they send us a free box of candles."

                                                                                                  "Oh," replied the auditor somewhat disappointed that his unusual question actually had a practical answer. So he thought he'd go on, in his obnoxious way...

                                                                                                  "Rabbi, what about all these matzo purchases? What do you do with the crumbs from the matzo?"

                                                                                                  "Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi calmly, "we actually collect up all the crumbs from the matzo and when we have enough, we send them in a box back to the manufacturer and every now and then, they send a box of matzo balls."

                                                                                                  "Oh," replied the auditor, thinking hard how to fluster the Rabbi.

                                                                                                  "Well, Rabbi," he went on, "what do you do with all the foreskins from the circumcisions?"

                                                                                                  "Yes, here too, we do not waste," answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save up all the foreskins, and when we have enough we actually send them to the I.R.S."

                                                                                                  "The I.R.S.?," questioned the auditor in disbelief.

                                                                                                  "Ahh, yes," replied the Rabbi, "the I.R.S. ...and about once a year, they send us a little prick like you."
                                                                                                  Silly but still kinda funny.

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                                                                                                    • BlueDesignStudios
                                                                                                      Confirmed User
                                                                                                      • Feb 2003
                                                                                                      • 9492
                                                                                                      #26

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                                                                                                        • reynold
                                                                                                          Too lazy to set a custom title
                                                                                                          • Oct 2002
                                                                                                          • 51271
                                                                                                          #27
                                                                                                          thanks i needed that boost... at least i smiled

                                                                                                            Comment

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