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| Discuss what's fucking going on, and which programs are best and worst. One-time "program" announcements from "established" webmasters are allowed. |
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#1 |
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Fucked if I know
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Do you have a flag?
Posts: 23,368
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Subject: Understanding The Male Species
Because I'm a Man: Because I'm a man, when I lock my keys in the car I will fiddle with a wire clothes hanger and ignore your suggestions that we call a road service until long after hypothermia has set in. Because I'm a man, when the car isn't running very well, I will pop the hood and stare at the engine as if I know what I'm looking at. If another man shows up, one of us will say to the other, "I used to be able to fix these things, but now with all these computers and everything, I wouldn't know where to start." We will then drink beer. Because I'm a man, when I catch a cold, I need someone to bring me soup and take care of me while I lie in bed and moan. You never get as sick as I do, so for you this isn't a problem. Because I'm a man, I can be relied upon to purchase basic groceries at the store, like milk or bread. I cannot be expected to find exotic items like "cumin" or "tofu." For all I know, these are the same thing. And never, under any circumstances, expect me to pick up anything for which "feminine hygiene product" is a euphemism. Because I'm a man, when one of our appliances stops working, I will insist on taking it apart, despite evidence that this will just cost me twice as much once the repair person gets here and has to put it back together. Because I'm a man, I must hold the television remote control in my hand while I watch TV. If the thing has been misplaced, I may miss a whole show looking for it though one time I was able to survive by holding a calculator). Because I'm a man, I don't think we're all that lost, and no, I don't think we should stop and ask someone. Why would you listen to a complete stranger? I mean, how the hell could he know where we're going? Because I'm a man, there is no need to ask me what I'm thinking about. The answer is always either sex or football. I have to make up something else when you ask, so don't. Because I'm a man, I do not want to visit your mother, or have your mother come visit us, or talk to her when she calls, or think about her any more than I have to. Whatever you got her for Mother's Day is okay, I don't need to see it. And don't forget to pick up something for my mother, too. Because I'm a man, you don't have to ask me if I liked the movie. Chances are, if you're crying at the end of it, I didn't. Because I'm a man, I think what you're wearing is fine. I thought what you were wearing five minutes ago was fine, too. Either pair of shoes is fine. With the belt or without it--looks fine. Your hair is fine. You look fine. Can we just go now? Because I'm a man, and this is, after all, the year 2003, I will share equally in the housework. You just do the laundry, the cooking, the gardening, the cleaning, the vacuuming, and the dishes, and I'll do the rest. This has been a public service message for Women to help them better understand the Male species... |
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#2 |
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ex-TeenGodFather
Industry Role:
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Suomi Finland Perkele
Posts: 20,306
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<b>"Because I'm a man, when I catch a cold, I need someone to bring me soup and take care of me while I lie in bed and moan. You never get as sick as I do, so for you this isn't a problem."</B>
That's not quite right. It's completely the opposite. Otherwise, quite true.
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..and I'm off. |
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#3 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 174
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Fuck being a girlfriend! I need a girlfriend!
-AC Tracey
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AC Lounge™ |
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#4 | |
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My hips don't lie
Industry Role:
Join Date: Nov 2002
Posts: 10,129
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Quote:
yeah, women always repeat this one... WTF?! ACtually, I dont like to get bothered when Iam sick ![]() |
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#5 |
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Pixel Pusher
Industry Role:
Join Date: Nov 2002
Posts: 7,094
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I'm sorry you had shitty relationships with men but most of those generalizations don't apply to me and probably don't apply to most men. In fact most of those statements, I am the opposite, and no I'm not gay.
Hater
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[email protected] |
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#6 |
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Confirmed User
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: hamsterdam
Posts: 6,085
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Because I'm a man, I couldn't post a rant like that about women for fear of being called sexist.
__________________
Converting like a mofo |
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#7 | |
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Fucked if I know
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Do you have a flag?
Posts: 23,368
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Quote:
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#8 | |
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Fucked if I know
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Do you have a flag?
Posts: 23,368
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Quote:
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#9 |
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WW4L
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: over the river and through the woods
Posts: 10,581
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what.. have to disagree here guys... my hubby and boys get sick and pass it between each other for a period off three weeks...i cater and coddle them and listen to their whining,but if i dare get sick..bah! I had stomach surgery and hubby acted like i was able to get up and move around and cook and clean and of course have a fight with him..
tala, that list is so funny.... |
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#10 | |
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WW4L
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: over the river and through the woods
Posts: 10,581
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Quote:
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