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Discuss what's fucking going on, and which programs are best and worst. One-time "program" announcements from "established" webmasters are allowed. |
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#1 |
So Fucking Banned
Industry Role:
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Westbahnhof
Posts: 15,336
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This Guy Was Told By Doctors That He Only Has 100 Orgasms Left Before His Penis Stops Working
This Guy Was Told By Doctors That He Only Has 100 Orgasms Left Before His Penis Stops Working!!!
![]() On a daily basis we see stories pulled directly from the news, or places like Reddit?s ?Today I Fucked Up? that make us think, ?HOLY SHIT, that is my goddamn nightmare.? Around 95% of those stories involve some sort of genital demise. Whether some guy accidentally knocks himself out masturbating ? only to be found on the floor (boner in hand) by his girlfriend ?or some cheating asshole has his penis cut off TWICE by his wife, all of them are harrowing and certainly nothing I want to gain any personal experience in. This story we received last night is no different. It comes from a guy (we?ll call him R.L.S.) who is friends with someone in our company and he wrote in because he wanted to see if anyone else is facing a similar ?HOLY SHIT, that is my goddamn nightmare? situation. According to R.L.S.?s email: I?m 34 years old and I have a finite amount of real, working, orgasm-capable erections remaining. They estimate I have about a hundred nuts left. You cannot imagine the feeling. I go in for what I think is a routine physical, and I?m blindsided. My whole life changes in an instant; like hearing you have six months to live. I honestly thought the doctor was fucking with me? how do you even process that kind of information? But I?ve now seen the full battery of experts and specialists. They call it ideopathic fibrosis of the corpora cavernosa. Catchy, right? Basically, there?s a reservoir in your penis that fills with blood when you have an erection. In my case, every time I get hard, it causes an autoimmune reaction, which causes a scar tissue build-up in the reservoir. Ultimately, the scar tissue will make it impossible to ever get a boner again. I?m the first case anyone?s ever seen, and no one can tell me why it?s happening. I don?t wear briefs or hang out in saunas. There?s been no blunt force trauma to the balls. Some of the women from my past have suggested it?s karma, and I?m actually starting to believe it. I?ve tried every conceivable therapy and medication there is, but nothing works. So I?ve been through the five stages of grief. I accept my fate. But that?s not the same as knowing how to cope with it. Masturbation?s obviously out of the question. I feel like I need to be super selective with women, as if all of a sudden I?m gonna start banging Victoria?s Secret models. Like I deserve it now, in some sort of twisted Make a Wish for a Dying Penis bid. And lately, I?m terrified of sex itself. I slept with one woman since the diagnosis, but when she wanted to go for a second round, a wave of incredible panic swept over me. I burst into a cold sweat and my chest felt like it was gonna cave in on itself. Since then I?ve been chaste as a fucking nun, but I toss and turn all night with crazy, disturbing sex dreams, and now I?m worried that I?ll lose a nut to a wet dream. So I?m hoping to start a dialogue here. Has anyone out there experienced anything like this? How does one go about planning a farewell tour- a goodbye forever- to sex? Any advice/suggestions are truly appreciated. I?m rarely at a loss for words, but ya, that right there is nightmare fuel. |
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#2 |
So Fucking Banned
Industry Role:
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Westbahnhof
Posts: 15,336
|
What would you do if this is your last 100 fucks around?
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#3 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 4,204
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Online strip gaming with sexy gamer girls Best thing I ever signed up for: Quality Razors, Cheap Price |
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#4 |
Megan Fox's fluffer
Industry Role:
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: shooting pool in Elysium
Posts: 24,818
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#5 |
So Fucking Fabulous
Industry Role:
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Indiana
Posts: 11,375
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![]() ![]() I would for sure jerk off less that's for sure!
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#6 |
MY SIG MAKES YOU MONEY
Industry Role:
Join Date: May 2011
Location: IN MY SIGNATURE
Posts: 411
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![]() damn it that is so bad situation ![]() |
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#7 |
Too lazy to set a custom title
Industry Role:
Join Date: Sep 2003
Posts: 22,651
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what about night wood? $lifetimeBoners--
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#8 | |
So Fucking Fabulous
Industry Role:
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Indiana
Posts: 11,375
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that is what I thought too at first, but this quote makes it sound like he can get hard but can't cum
Quote:
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#9 |
Confirmed Chicago Pimp
Industry Role:
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Chicago
Posts: 7,100
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100 Rapes about to go down, gotta make em count, A-List celebs gotta get the sausage.
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#10 |
Too lazy to set a custom title
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 29,032
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Make a kickstarter page, except the donation is pussy. If you want to have more than 100 girls, take them in groups of 10.
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#11 |
Raise Your Weapon
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Outback Australia
Posts: 15,601
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The story is hyped, it's called Peyronie’s disease and affects lots of men, especially aged in their 50's and 60's.
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#12 |
MY SIG MAKES YOU MONEY
Industry Role:
Join Date: May 2011
Location: IN MY SIGNATURE
Posts: 411
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this guy doesn't look that old?
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#13 |
Raise Your Weapon
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Outback Australia
Posts: 15,601
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#14 |
Confirmed User
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Australia
Posts: 5,065
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Just do 100 different women still more than most.
__________________
Traffic.Tools - 40+ Free Tools Free.Marketing - 150+ Free Tools Submission.Tools - 20+ Free Tools |
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#15 |
Confirmed User
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: NC
Posts: 7,683
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time to get married son.
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SSD Cloud Server, VPS Server, Simple Cloud Hosting | DigitalOcean
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#16 |
So Fucking Banned
Industry Role:
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Westbahnhof
Posts: 15,336
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#17 |
Confirmed User
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Philadelphia
Posts: 2,704
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Perhaps. Then again, when his dick stops working the missis might get a little "funny".
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![]() 50/50 lifetime payout - EXCLUSIVE CONTENT - CCBill CLiCK here for your Bun Beating Dollars. |
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#18 |
Confirmed User
Join Date: Nov 2002
Posts: 1,249
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Can't he get that pump thing people used to get before viagra?
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#19 |
Raise Your Weapon
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Outback Australia
Posts: 15,601
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#20 |
Too lazy to set a custom title
Industry Role:
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: 567721649
Posts: 12,167
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Time to make more girls pregnant
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#21 |
So Fucking Banned
Industry Role:
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Westbahnhof
Posts: 15,336
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i'm sure these days there is a medical solution, but not a cheap one
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#22 |
Persona on sale
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: St. Mainstream
Posts: 1,500
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Promote yourself in this signature! |
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