Critique my tour designs - GoFuckYourself.com

Ironhorse · 02-21-2003, 05:04 AM

I know this is a little spammy, but I was honestly hoping for a critique to my first few tour designs:

under construction
http://www.sexymojo.com/design/clien...st/tour01.html

http://www.sexymojo.com/design/clien...res/index.html

http://www.sexymojo.com/design/clien...gon/index.html

Ok rip'em apart, and if this is too spammy, someone let me know I'll be gentler next time =)

eroswebmaster · 02-21-2003, 05:09 AM

I like the first 2, the 3rd page a bunch of images weren't loading for me.

02-21-2003, 05:11 AM

Excellent!

nice, clean, crisp and they give the surfer enough to look at before deciding to pull those cc's out!

I especially like This page... You've blocked out her pussy, but there's still a nice little butthole poking out!

Ironhorse · 02-21-2003, 05:13 AM

Thanks guys, I guess the customer put the tour up for the dragon site, faster http://www.xxxdragon.com/

.:Frog:. · 02-21-2003, 05:44 AM

Design looks great, and the models on the tour are attractive.

Za Ha · 02-21-2003, 08:16 AM

VERY NICE!

SGS · 02-21-2003, 08:33 AM

Very classy

angeleyes · 02-21-2003, 08:33 AM

I liked the site...good job. My only suggestion would be to put a couple more "teaser" photos on the tour pages. Otherwise... Nice Job!

DX · 02-21-2003, 08:39 AM

I liked the teenie pleasures best..
so i'll point out what I saw..

globally:
the censoring is inconsistent from page to page..
the word "stink" is usually a turn off ; )
100s and 1000s tend to look better with apostrophes
the small blue text on the left, is maybe a bit too small..

the front page:
girl.. front and center.. gotta fix her color.
group sex is two words, or hyphenated.
not everyone knows what "DP" stands for.
elke-18 & rosa-18 coulda been cropped a bit better.
minor grammar issues.

page 2:
pics could use some color fixes.
minor grammar issues.

page3:
front and center pic, looks like her breast and arm were amputated..
front and center pic, scanlines if you must have them, are too intense.
front and center pic, color issues.
minor grammar issues.

join:
reused pics from earlier in tour..

Ironhorse · 02-21-2003, 08:51 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by DX
I liked the teenie pleasures best..
so i'll point out what I saw..

globally:
the censoring is inconsistent from page to page..
the word "stink" is usually a turn off ; )
100s and 1000s tend to look better with apostrophes
the small blue text on the left, is maybe a bit too small..

the front page:
girl.. front and center.. gotta fix her color.
group sex is two words, or hyphenated.
not everyone knows what "DP" stands for.
elke-18 & rosa-18 coulda been cropped a bit better.
minor grammar issues.

page 2:
pics could use some color fixes.
minor grammar issues.

page3:
front and center pic, looks like her breast and arm were amputated..
front and center pic, scanlines if you must have them, are too intense.
front and center pic, color issues.
minor grammar issues.

join:
reused pics from earlier in tour..

Now THAT'S a critique =) Thanks for the feedback everyone

gothweb · 02-21-2003, 08:57 AM

The third tour seems a little flat to me. All in all, good work.

Stalinrocks · 02-21-2003, 06:10 PM

Mutt · 02-21-2003, 06:23 PM

first two are real nice, much better than most I see.

the owner of the first site should contact me, looks like he's going after the teen amateur niche and the girls look too pro and magazine-ish for that target audience.

Ron2k1 · 02-21-2003, 06:26 PM

I think your 2nd page is pretty good

I don't really like the other ones, sorry

SetTheWorldonFire · 02-21-2003, 08:19 PM

nice clean amateur look

Ironhorse · 02-22-2003, 10:53 AM

Mutt, you've got mail!

02-21-2003, 05:04 AM	#1
Ironhorse Pixel Pusher Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2002 Posts: 7,093	Critique my tour designs I know this is a little spammy, but I was honestly hoping for a critique to my first few tour designs: under construction http://www.sexymojo.com/design/clien...st/tour01.html http://www.sexymojo.com/design/clien...res/index.html http://www.sexymojo.com/design/clien...gon/index.html Ok rip'em apart, and if this is too spammy, someone let me know I'll be gentler next time =) __________________ [email protected]

02-21-2003, 05:09 AM	#2
eroswebmaster March 1st, 2003 Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Seat 4 @ Venetian Poker Room Posts: 20,295	I like the first 2, the 3rd page a bunch of images weren't loading for me. __________________ For rent - ICQ 127-027-910 Click here for more details

02-21-2003, 05:13 AM	#4
Ironhorse Pixel Pusher Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2002 Posts: 7,093	Thanks guys, I guess the customer put the tour up for the dragon site, faster http://www.xxxdragon.com/ __________________ [email protected]

02-21-2003, 05:44 AM	#5
.:Frog:. Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: ~ C A N A D A ~ Posts: 2,123	Design looks great, and the models on the tour are attractive. __________________ <a href="http://www.pornopayouts.com/?rid=pp3076">PornoPayouts</a> Tons of Hosted Galleries. Last edited by .:Frog:.; 02-21-2003 at 05:47 AM..

02-21-2003, 08:33 AM	#7
SGS Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Mallorca - Nottingham Posts: 5,176	Very classy __________________ See sig...

02-21-2003, 05:11 AM	#3
shermo Guest Posts: n/a	Excellent! nice, clean, crisp and they give the surfer enough to look at before deciding to pull those cc's out! I especially like This page... You've blocked out her pussy, but there's still a nice little butthole poking out!

02-21-2003, 08:16 AM	#6
Za Ha Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Still lost Posts: 5,112	VERY NICE!

02-21-2003, 08:33 AM	#8
angeleyes Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Wandering around FL using random Wireless Connections Posts: 3,584	I liked the site...good job. My only suggestion would be to put a couple more "teaser" photos on the tour pages. Otherwise... Nice Job! __________________ Need a Writer? Contact Me. I write quality descriptions, short erotic stories, quality one-liners.. whatever you need.

02-21-2003, 08:39 AM	#9
DX Feed me coffee. Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Massafuckingchusetts Posts: 1,128	I liked the teenie pleasures best.. so i'll point out what I saw.. globally: the censoring is inconsistent from page to page.. the word "stink" is usually a turn off ; ) 100s and 1000s tend to look better with apostrophes the small blue text on the left, is maybe a bit too small.. the front page: girl.. front and center.. gotta fix her color. group sex is two words, or hyphenated. not everyone knows what "DP" stands for. elke-18 & rosa-18 coulda been cropped a bit better. minor grammar issues. page 2: pics could use some color fixes. minor grammar issues. page3: front and center pic, looks like her breast and arm were amputated.. front and center pic, scanlines if you must have them, are too intense. front and center pic, color issues. minor grammar issues. join: reused pics from earlier in tour..

02-21-2003, 08:57 AM	#11
gothweb Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Back in the USSA Posts: 8,849	The third tour seems a little flat to me. All in all, good work. __________________ Photos by Ian X.: Distinctive photos of goth babes. Blood Money:Your traffic, my sites, our money. MojoHost: Still the best.

02-21-2003, 06:10 PM	#12
Stalinrocks Registered User Join Date: Feb 2003 Posts: 91

02-21-2003, 06:23 PM	#13
Mutt Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2002 Posts: 34,431	first two are real nice, much better than most I see. the owner of the first site should contact me, looks like he's going after the teen amateur niche and the girls look too pro and magazine-ish for that target audience. __________________ I moved my sites to Vacares Hosting. I've saved money, my hair is thicker, lost some weight too! Thanks Sly!

02-21-2003, 06:26 PM	#14
Ron2k1 Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 1,573	I think your 2nd page is pretty good I don't really like the other ones, sorry

02-21-2003, 08:19 PM	#15
SetTheWorldonFire Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: California Posts: 7,444	nice clean amateur look __________________ www.STWOFDesign.com hit me up on icq 154206276 or Skype: JaimeGizzle

02-22-2003, 10:53 AM	#16
Ironhorse Pixel Pusher Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2002 Posts: 7,093	Mutt, you've got mail! __________________ [email protected]