Tom Cruise thinks he?s on planet to vanquish aliens - GoFuckYourself.com

Heath · 01-14-2013, 10:45 AM

http://www.nypost.com/p/news/nationa...zwenypJR7dWK/0

Quote:

Tom Cruise will save the world from aliens ? not on the big screen but in real life.

His day job as an actor pales next to the billion-year contract of service he signed with the Church of Scientology, according to a bombshell new book, ?Going Clear: Scientology, Hollywood & The Prison of Belief.? New Yorker writer Lawrence Wright details Cruise?s demigod status within the church, as well as the group?s ultimate purpose ? protect humanity from aliens living in our bodies, who are bent on destroying us and ultimately the planet.

Cruise was introduced to the religion when he was 23 years old by his then-girlfriend, actress Mimi Rogers. Seven years his senior, Rogers was an avowed member of Scientology; they married in 1987. Cruise was quickly intrigued, but he kept his initial participation low-profile. He began undergoing ?auditing? ? a process in which church members are queried about every aspect of their lives ? under his given name, Thomas Mapother IV.

It took several years for church leaders to realize that for all of their celebrity acolytes ? including John Travolta, Priscilla Presley, Kirstie Alley, Kelly Preston and Sonny Bono ? they had a true superstar at their disposal.

Cruise would later come to believe that in the hierarchy of Scientology, he was No. 3, behind only the founder, the late L. Ron Hubbard (known as LRH) and No. 2 David Miscavige, who goes by COB, for Chairman of the Board of the Religious Technology Center.

Or, as Cruise would later scold a Scientologist girlfriend who had suffered through severe menstrual pain during dinner with Miscavige and therefore shown disrespect to both men: ?You don?t get it. It goes like this. First, there?s LRH.? Cruise had raised his hand in the air and lowered it as he counted. ?Then, there?s COB. Then there?s me.?

That girlfriend, Naz Boniadi, was auditioned as a possible wife before Katie Holmes. After that incident, she never saw Cruise again. According to the book, her punishment for failure would include the cleaning of public toilets using only a toothbrush (Scientology officials have denied this).

By his own account, Cruise was ?a functional illiterate? by the time he graduated high school. He suffered from dyslexia and was also the product of a troubled, chaotic upbringing. He was born in upstate Syracuse but spent much of his childhood in Canada. He was just 12 years old when his mother woke up early one morning, grabbed Cruise and his three sisters and fled from Cruise?s abusive father. They felt, he said, ?like fugitives.?

Full Article : http://www.nypost.com/p/news/nationa...zwenypJR7dWK/0

Farang · 01-14-2013, 10:54 AM

In other words, Tom Cruise is an idiot. Unless im missing something...

seeandsee · 01-14-2013, 11:01 AM

Tom must be new son of aliens

Tofu · 01-14-2013, 11:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Farang

In other words, Tom Cruise is an idiot. Unless im missing something...

No, you pretty much nailed it.

Dirty F · 01-14-2013, 11:06 AM

Batshit crazy.

Supz · 01-14-2013, 11:36 AM

He does all this to hide is homosexuality.

Mutt · 01-14-2013, 11:53 AM

"Or, as Cruise would later scold a Scientologist girlfriend who had suffered through severe menstrual pain during dinner with Miscavige and therefore shown disrespect to both men: ?You don?t get it. It goes like this. First, there?s LRH.? Cruise had raised his hand in the air and lowered it as he counted. ?Then, there?s COB. Then there?s me.?"

I'm not sure it's all that he's batshit crazy, he is more likely to be a functioning retard. He is dyslexic and graduated high school as a functional illiterate. Just because he's a good looking guy and became a famous actor/celebrity doesn't make him different than millions of adults with low IQ's - for all we know he could have the mental capacity of an 8 year old and that's why he is so impressionable.

Tofu · 01-14-2013, 12:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Supz

He does all this to hide is homosexuality.

GrantMercury · 01-14-2013, 04:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mutt

I'm not sure it's all that he's batshit crazy, he is more likely to be a functioning retard. He is dyslexic and graduated high school as a functional illiterate. Just because he's a good looking guy and became a famous actor/celebrity doesn't make him different than millions of adults with low IQ's - for all we know he could have the mental capacity of an 8 year old and that's why he is so impressionable.

grumpy · 01-14-2013, 04:08 PM

and they say Charlie Sheen has issues

DWB · 01-14-2013, 04:20 PM

Yea but... he's Tom Cruise.

Laugh it up day and night and he'll still be kicking ass as a global super star while everyone poking fun at him will continue posting on GFY and watching his movies.

ReggieDurango · 01-14-2013, 04:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DWB

Yea but... he's Tom Cruise.

Laugh it up day and night and he'll still be kicking ass as a global super star while everyone poking fun at him will continue posting on GFY and watching his movies.

QFT

Also, saw Jack Reacher, not half bad!

xNetworx · 01-14-2013, 04:36 PM

So is the alien the pitcher or the catcher?

BlackCrayon · 01-14-2013, 05:32 PM

tell the retard hes gonna be a hero and save the world and thus gives up all this money to said cause. sounds like perfect fleecing.

mechanicvirus · 01-14-2013, 10:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Farang

In other words, Tom Cruise is an idiot. Unless im missing something...

Haha yup!

__________________

mineistaken · 01-14-2013, 10:40 PM

Who has spare time to invent new "religion"? We could all join and call it gfyology

mineistaken · 01-14-2013, 10:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Supz

He does all this to hide is homosexuality.

Interesting. Why would you say they are gay?

blonda80 · 01-15-2013, 02:55 AM

after some age some people go crazy i think

BIGTYMER · 01-15-2013, 03:06 AM

MrGusMuller · 01-15-2013, 04:00 AM

too much War of the Worlds...

by the way, I like his jacket

Aidoru · 01-16-2013, 09:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MrGusMuller

too much War of the Worlds...

by the way, I like his jacket

I prefer the Tron jacket

EddyTheDog · 01-16-2013, 09:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mineistaken

Interesting. Why would you say they are gay?

Wasn't there a pic of Travolta snogging some guy?

That's always a give away....

01-14-2013, 10:54 AM	#2
Farang one sick puppy Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Where the worst of the West meets the worst of the East Posts: 11,565	In other words, Tom Cruise is an idiot. Unless im missing something... __________________ i sale uncensored chatbots

01-14-2013, 11:01 AM	#3
seeandsee Check SIG! Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Europe (Skype: gojkoas) Posts: 50,945	Tom must be new son of aliens __________________ BUY MY SIG - 50$/Year Contact here

01-14-2013, 11:53 AM	#7
Mutt Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Sep 2002 Posts: 34,431	"Or, as Cruise would later scold a Scientologist girlfriend who had suffered through severe menstrual pain during dinner with Miscavige and therefore shown disrespect to both men: ?You don?t get it. It goes like this. First, there?s LRH.? Cruise had raised his hand in the air and lowered it as he counted. ?Then, there?s COB. Then there?s me.?" I'm not sure it's all that he's batshit crazy, he is more likely to be a functioning retard. He is dyslexic and graduated high school as a functional illiterate. Just because he's a good looking guy and became a famous actor/celebrity doesn't make him different than millions of adults with low IQ's - for all we know he could have the mental capacity of an 8 year old and that's why he is so impressionable. __________________ I moved my sites to Vacares Hosting. I've saved money, my hair is thicker, lost some weight too! Thanks Sly!

01-14-2013, 04:08 PM	#10
grumpy Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Holland Posts: 9,870	and they say Charlie Sheen has issues __________________ Don't let greediness blur your vision \| You gotta let some shit slide icq - 441-456-888

01-14-2013, 05:32 PM	#14
BlackCrayon Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Ottawa Posts: 19,631	tell the retard hes gonna be a hero and save the world and thus gives up all this money to said cause. sounds like perfect fleecing. __________________ you don't know you're wearing a leash if you sit by the peg all day..

01-14-2013, 11:06 AM	#5
Dirty F Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2001 Posts: 59,204	Batshit crazy.

01-14-2013, 11:36 AM	#6
Supz Arthur Flegenheimer Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: New York City Posts: 11,056	He does all this to hide is homosexuality.

01-14-2013, 04:20 PM	#11
DWB Registered User Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Encrypted. Access denied. Posts: 31,779	Yea but... he's Tom Cruise. Laugh it up day and night and he'll still be kicking ass as a global super star while everyone poking fun at him will continue posting on GFY and watching his movies.

01-14-2013, 04:36 PM	#13
xNetworx So Fucking What Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Whore Island Posts: 14,445	So is the alien the pitcher or the catcher?

01-14-2013, 10:40 PM	#16
mineistaken See signature :) Industry Role: Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: ICQ 363 097 773 Posts: 29,656	Who has spare time to invent new "religion"? We could all join and call it gfyology

01-15-2013, 02:55 AM	#18
blonda80 FOR HIRE: AFF Manager Industry Role: Join Date: May 2006 Location: EU Posts: 10,959	after some age some people go crazy i think __________________ Weekly Paying Affiliate Program with Dating Cam Offers! TrafficGoldmine.com is the official home of HookUP.com They offer payments by PayPal, Paxum, BTC, Bkash, Webmoney & more!

01-15-2013, 03:06 AM	#19
BIGTYMER Junior Achiever Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Walled Garden Posts: 17,066

01-15-2013, 04:00 AM	#20
MrGusMuller Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: Portugal Posts: 1,262	too much War of the Worlds... by the way, I like his jacket __________________ StagCMS - Adult CMS - user friendly adult content management system - speed up your websites with no SQL connections ICQ: 632343*113