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Old 12-16-2008, 03:45 PM   #1
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The Fed goes to Defcon 1

WASHINGTON (MarketWatch) -- The Federal Reserve declared war on Tuesday, promising to do whatever it takes to prevent a depression.

With the economy teetering on the edge of a prolonged slump, the central bank's policy-making Federal Open Market Committee slashed interest rates on Tuesday to near zero, and vowed to use "all available tools" to keep the economy from collapsing into a depression. See full story.

After a two-day meeting in Washington, Bernanke rounded up even the most reluctant members of the FOMC to unanimously endorse the most drastic actions this central bank has ever taken.

To no one's surprise, the Fed said the economic outlook had "weakened further," and it set aside any immediate worries about inflation. For the next while, all of the Fed's focus will be on easing the credit crunch, pumping money through the financial system, and getting the economy growing again.
"The committee anticipates that weak economic conditions are likely to warrant exceptionally low levels of the federal funds rate for some time," the statement said.
Read the statement.
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Old 12-16-2008, 03:47 PM   #2
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my bedroom is at Defcon 5
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Old 12-16-2008, 03:57 PM   #3
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my bedroom is at Defcon 5
is your missile out of airbags silo yet?
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Old 12-16-2008, 04:00 PM   #4
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How about this, you PAY ME to borrow your money and I'll take a 3 trillion dollar unsecured loan OK?

I'll spend it in so many different places it will bail out the entire economy... I'll buy a dodge viper, The best Corvette and a Yukon Denali XL and hmmm... Ford doesn't offer SHIT that I'd want but they're the best managed company of them so I guess I'll take a GT500 but I want it chopped to be topless. Just for the sake of America I'll only buy american cars ;)

Lets see.... I'll start buying up a shitload of foreclosed houses and become a slumlord.

I'll make sure all those starving hookers and strippers get paid too! I'll find a dozen or so welfare moms that are a bit chunky and pay them to suck my dick a few times a month... Those chunky whores tend to suck the best and if they're poor they might be hungry so you know they'll swallow
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Old 12-16-2008, 04:01 PM   #5
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my bedroom is at Defcon 5
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Old 12-16-2008, 04:02 PM   #6
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The only way the Fed can fix anything is for them to dissolve the Federal Reserve and all of them resign from their jobs. But that's not going to happen. What will happen will be another form of the same scam on a larger scale.
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Old 12-16-2008, 04:03 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by farkedup View Post
How about this, you PAY ME to borrow your money and I'll take a 3 trillion dollar unsecured loan OK?

I'll spend it in so many different places it will bail out the entire economy... I'll buy a dodge viper, The best Corvette and a Yukon Denali XL and hmmm... Ford doesn't offer SHIT that I'd want but they're the best managed company of them so I guess I'll take a GT500 but I want it chopped to be topless. Just for the sake of America I'll only buy american cars ;)

Lets see.... I'll start buying up a shitload of foreclosed houses and become a slumlord.

I'll make sure all those starving hookers and strippers get paid too! I'll find a dozen or so welfare moms that are a bit chunky and pay them to suck my dick a few times a month... Those chunky whores tend to suck the best and if they're poor they might be hungry so you know they'll swallow
I will also help with this endeavor...would you mind splitting that and us both getting only a 1.5 trillion dollar unsecured loan?
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Old 12-16-2008, 04:11 PM   #8
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more money for FR
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Old 12-16-2008, 04:30 PM   #9
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I will also help with this endeavor...would you mind splitting that and us both getting only a 1.5 trillion dollar unsecured loan?
I don't know if I can spare THAT much but I might be able to float ya a few hundred billion BUT you have to

1) Only buy american cars
2) NEVER shop at walmart
3) blow tons of cash on hookers and strippers WITHOUT drug habits... oh shit that would be too hard to do... Lets just leave that one alone ;) I love roughing up those crackwhores
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Old 12-16-2008, 04:35 PM   #10
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Touch it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 12-16-2008, 05:00 PM   #11
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Let's play a little game.

In the article summary, find the reverse-psychological lines meant to keep the public complacent, while a depression creeps up closer and closer only to blindside the majority of the American people who bite into the 'fluff'. The winners get 100 free acres of land on the Sun.
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Old 12-16-2008, 05:01 PM   #12
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The only way the Fed can fix anything is for them to dissolve the Federal Reserve and all of them resign from their jobs. But that's not going to happen. What will happen will be another form of the same scam on a larger scale.
Some one is already close to 100 free acres of solar landscape.
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Old 12-16-2008, 05:03 PM   #13
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This is nothing more than a stop gap measure designed to keep the sheep at ease until the final touches are put in place for the NEW WORLD ORDER.
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Old 12-16-2008, 06:22 PM   #14
Robbie
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Originally Posted by farkedup View Post
I don't know if I can spare THAT much but I might be able to float ya a few hundred billion BUT you have to

1) Only buy american cars
2) NEVER shop at walmart
3) blow tons of cash on hookers and strippers WITHOUT drug habits... oh shit that would be too hard to do... Lets just leave that one alone ;) I love roughing up those crackwhores
Done, done, and done. And I will throw in the roughing up crackwhores during hard, hard, hard sex as well just to make damn sure our economy is back on track.
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