Name some things you wish women knew about men
 

I'll start.

-If I want to have sex with you, I find you attractive. Stop asking me if I dislike your ass, boobs, stomach or whatever.

-Yes, I watch porn. All men do.

-Me looking at other women does not mean I am not attracted to you. It means I am male.

-If you have to ask, you're probably not hotter than that chick. No, you're not the most attractive woman in the world. Deal with it.

-If you weren't skinny when we started dating, chances are that I actually like the fact that you're not skinny.

-It's not my fault that you have pms. If you get mad at me because of it, I will think you are batshit insane.

-When I'm having sex with you, sometimes I fantasize about other women. I could be having sex with other women while fantasizing about you, instead. Take your pick.

-Your co-worker's sister's friend's love life doesn't interest me in the slightest. If you talk about it for over 10 seconds, I will not listen. If I pretend to listen while actually thinking about busty Swedish maidens bringing me beer, be happy - it's the closest thing to me listening you're going to get.

-Thinking of busty Swedish maidens bringing me beer makes me happy.

-My penis is twice as large as those of any guy you've ever had sex with. I know it's not true, and I don't care. Lie to me.

-Any movie that contains both explosions and people dying in spectacular new ways is worth watching.

-Yes, I just looked at her boobs. I had no other choice - they were there, and I have eyes.

-Sarah Jessica Parker is not a fashion icon. She's the Wicked Witch of the West. Try and look like her, and I will leave you.

Don't clean up my messy office as a favor, because you're essentially hiding every fucking thing I need.

Charge your fucking cellphone, or I'll take you off the plan.

I don't care if you can cook. Tombstone sells a great pizza at the supermarket.

It's not the size of your boobs that matters, its the shape.

Don't get too small.
Eleven year old boys hips = NOT SEXY

As long as your waist is small and your stomach is flat, your butt can't be too big.

Don't ever say it's "the perfect size".

That's a good one. I hate it when they do that. Hate, hate, hate it. :mad:

That One!!

I wish they all knew that... I mean really, Do I clean up your purse?

so f'n true

To shut the fuck up during the hockey/football game.we can chat during the commercials and intermission

Don't play crazy mind fuck games, men can't guess, we need to be told....

They need to know that when they turn to their guy and ask him "What are you thinking?" 95% of the time we really are thinking about nothing.

The other 5% of the time we are thinking about being a spy on a covert operation or something like that.

It's always easier to say "Nothing" even if you are in that 5% phase :)

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

Thanks for this post I will be a better woman now.



:winkwink:

menexplained.com - that's what I'm using all ideas for.

(and no, it has no design - its sole purpose is to explain men to exactly one woman)

Nice list actually! Definitely things to keep in mind... :thumbsup

One question though... Is it conceivable that maybe she just wants to be lied to too? Most women (super model or super hag) will agree she's not the most attractive woman out there, but maybe she wants her man to tell her she is anyways and lie to her just the same way you would like to be lied to? ;)

The problem is the direct comparison with something that's right in front of you. If I'm on a nude beach with my girlfriend and Lexington Steele walks past, I won't ask her "is my penis bigger than his?" and expect an even remotely believable answer I want to hear.

If I'm dating a girl, I'll tell her she's the prettiest girl I've ever seen and actually mean it while saying it, but when Scarlett Johansson is on tv... she probably shouldn't ask for a comparison.

As for penises, the subject isn't really something worth discussing, anyway. It's not like a guy can actually change the size of his parts. Some women bring it up in random conversation, though. I once dated a girl who out of the blue told me that she had once dated a guy with a 15 inch penis. After that, I had to break up with her because every time I saw her, I couldn't help remembering that.

I did track down the guy and paid him to do a shoot, though. If he'd been able to actually get it up, he'd be rich now :1orglaugh

this thread is very informative and educational. gfy has everthing

-Silence is golden. Really.
-If the TV is on, talk only during commercials, and NEVER during a movie, unless I have the remote and have paused it for you.
-don't neglect the balls.
-stay out of my office, especially when I'm coding, or on the phone.
-I'll eat your pussy whenever you want for as long as you want, unless its bleeding.
-girls don't fart or shit, please make sure I never have any evidence to contradict this fact.
-sex and other forms of physical intimacy are critical to the ongoing emotional and physical well being of a guy in a "relationship". If you want to drive us away, get distant and frigid for a prolonged period.
-its fairly easy to keep a guy happy, just figure out the three or four critical elements and we're fine forever.
-

Thanks, there are some good ones in there :thumbsup

These are all pretty good :)

hahahahahah Thanks :)

Sure, we'll lie but return the favor and lie about the size of our ass... Same thing "your ass is the best size/shape than any woman I've been with" :winkwink:

"It's not the size of your boobs that matters, its the shape. "

This is a good one.

Also, Sarah Jessica Parker is post-op, I am certain of it.

You have a deal :thumbsup

You guys are pretty close on it and the sarah jessica parker thing is gospel...

Thanks. Very informative.

to keep a man happy, keep putting out

if you want your bf or husband to not cheat on you, then put out more

if you keep putting out, you can get away with almost anything

if you think you are already putting out a lot, you aren't. put out more.

thats my :2 cents:

When I ask you whats wrong and you say nothing. I will take you at your word.

Damn. I can't believe I forgot about that one!

That's definitely one for the list :thumbsup

Btw, the full list is here right now: http://menexplained.com/

If anyone sees something they disagree with, please let me know :)

- We love the occasional fuck with women we don't know and probably will never see again

WHY can't men read our minds WHY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That sounds great, can't wait till you have it up and done!


:thumbsup

Learn the difference between Grape Jelly and Grape Jam at the supermarket.

It fucking sucks, making a peanut butter and jam sandwich. Jam is not Jelly! Jelly is Jelly, bitches!

thats the best you could come up with? haha

there are some really good ones in there.

Heh, I actually got a reaction on the email address at the top of that page:

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

good stuff

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh :thumbsup Something about this struck me and I actually chuckled out loud. I've never been much of a "what are you thinking?" kind of girl.

That you boobs(regardless of their size) are sensitive, but not as sensitive as our balls. Let us hold and play with them.

That if we are not feeling like having sex, means we really mean it. Don't take it personally.

That you boobs(regardless of their size) are sensitive, but not as sensitive as our balls. Let us hold and play with them.

That if we are not feeling like having sex, means we really mean it. Don't take it personally.

thread seriously bookmarked :)

- A blowjob won't fix everything but it's always a good first step on the off chance it might.

For example:

A BJ won't fix the broken light switch in your master closet. But if you give me a BJ and then ask me nicely afterwards? Done and done, baby.

A BJ won't make your cellphone payment, but if you give me one and then ask me to borrow $100. Done and done, baby.

A BJ won't get you out of paying me back the $100, but if you give me one every time I ask for the money? Done and done.

Already on the list:

A blowjob is always appreciated, and will make us forgive you for anything you might've done short of cheating on us or killing our mother.

:winkwink:

haha :upsidedow:upsidedow

That 5% is usually about girls I used to bang.

Nice.


:thumbsup:winkwink::thumbsup

Give that page an addthis.com button and it'll spread like wildfire...

I wish woman could understand this one simple thing:

Men only care about sex. No need to keep hoping otherwise.

Good idea, done :thumbsup

Sometimes men just like to be left alone and not bothered and no i feel fine, there is nothing wrong.

because theirs too many voices in there..:1orglaugh
(nice orangutan pic :thumbsup)

1. Surprise me from time to time with a random 'I'm happy to have you' blowjob in the car or while I'm watching tv or whatever. Something random that lets me know you want me to feel good. Its not about the blowjob as much as its about you wanting me to feel good.

2. I really don't care about anything that happens at your work that doesn't involve you and I REALLY don't care about the relationship issues your friends are having.

3. Sometimes I want you to AT LEAST offer to pay for a meal or movie or whatever. If you don't, then you better surprise me with random 'I thought this would look good on you' gifts from time to time when you go shopping.

4. Shut the fuck up and let me drive. ( I don't care how many wrecks I've been in I don't want you to even try to dictate how fast I'm going )

5. Yes I think some of your friends are hot and I would have sex with them if I knew 100% that you wouldn't find out. If you don't believe me, tell me you decided you want to have a threesome with them and watch how fast I agree. (honestly I might play it off like I have to think about it but the final answer will be yes if I want to fuck the girl you offer)

6. I want to watch you fuck with other guys. I don't know why, it just turns me on.

7. Sometimes I don't want to be around you. Its not because I don't like you, its because I want to be alone or I have shit on my mind, etc. Don't take offense, just let me have my space when I need it.

8. Even though that 18 year old girl dressed like a prostitute is a lot younger than me, I still think she is hot and would fuck her if given the chance. And...I love how shes dressed, and yes I was staring at her and I'll probably be thinking about her next time we have sex!

9. I'll eat your pussy or worship your body any time you want, in addition to the random worshipings.


5 out of 9 are about sex....not too shabby if you ask me. I was thinking it would be at least 8 out of 9...lol. :winkwink: