I am in direct contact with Jesus.... Ask Him Anything right now!!
 

I am indirect contact with Jesus.... Ask Him Anything right now!!

no shit....

Me jesus on a fiirst name basis and he wanted me to come on GFY and answer all of your questions in his own words

Jesus: open your hearts my children, I have provided ye with a means to hear my words

will all the people who lived and died before jesus was ever born be considered heathens and burn in hell ?

Jesus: Oh ye naive child.. read you not the accounting of my life, my emergence from fertile womb...? read you not of these forsaken heathens set forth by the spirits of darkness to lie waste upon the land in anticipation of my arrival, they..are forsaken my son..all but an anointed few

Must be nice to talk to a GODsun are you going to talk to set also ?

Will people ever figure out you are a fictive character?

They are one in the same

Fuck him and his cousin too.

I'm tired of seeing them every time I go to Home Depot.

Go sell some fruit or something.

Will the LA KINGS ever make the playoffs.

How often should you water a tall fescue grass per week and how much?

Is he black or white?

Jesus:
Are you not a believer my child?.. must I part the oceans again? Must you witness me arise from my tomb ? must you look me in the eye to know that I exist my child, yet? you believe the realm of trees to be a forest you have never seen?

but cannot believe in I?.. my flesh.. sacrificed? and yet I remain fictive in your mortal mind. My child you will soon meet your fate by means of my wrath?.vindication belongs to I your lord

Bow down???........................................... .......bitch

do you ever miss being able to eat M & Ms?

Jesus: Thy father has been made aware of your displeasure

Jesus: My son.. I can grant blind men sight... I can part seas... I can give the gift of life.

But I do have limits I am sorry

Jesus doth thou believe in the reach around?

Jesus: twice per week my child... with aprox 3 inches of the water I hae given you

:1orglaugh

Jesus: I am of no color or gender my child as my being is but a reflection of all my children combined

Jesus:
Reses are the way of the lord my child? you must repent for your admitted sin

Repent!!

Where does holy shit come from?

Does it make good fertilizer?

Jesus: Yes my child? thy reach around is the only true path of thy lord. Thou shalt not follow the false prophets of the reach behind, or the reach under? those will be forsaken by the lord? thy practitioners of thy reach around will be anointed sainthood

http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html

:thumbsup

Jesus: This my child serves as a reminder to all mankind of the great supper. Ecoli is bad my child..very bad

Concentrate on the four little dots in the middle of the picture for about 30 seconds... then look @ the wall

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c1...l/SeeJesus.jpg

classic :)

Jesus you really know your shit :1orglaugh

Ask him if he knows Donny.

Jesus: Donny is protected?????????.


In his head

:1orglaugh

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

What would you do!?

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"If we are all God's children... What is so special about Jesus?"