Something To Offend Damn Near Everyone
 

SOMETHING TO OFFEND DAMN NEAR EVERYONE



Q. What's the Cuban national anthem?
A. Row, Row, Row Your Boat

Q. Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A. A different bar

Q. What did the Chinese couple name their retarded baby?
A. Sum Ting Wong

Q. What do you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A. A speech impediment

Q. What does it mean when the Post Office's flag is flying at half-mast?
A. They're hiring

Q. Why aren't there any Puerto Ricans on Star Trek?
A. Because they're not going to work in the future either.

Q. What do you call a Mississippi farmer with a sheep under each arm?
A. A pimp.

Q. Why do Driver Education classes in redneck schools use the car only on
Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?
A. Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.

Q. What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
A. The southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage along
with a recipe.

Q. How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the "F" word?
A. Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell "BINGO!"

Q. What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale?
A. A northern fairytale begins, "Once upon a time..."
A southern fairytale begins, "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit."

Q. Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team?
A. Because all the Mexicans who can run, jump or swim are already in the United
States

I'm not offended.... I feel left out. :(

:1orglaugh

Damnit, I find none of that offensive.


Q: What do you call a ****** with a new bike?
A: A thief.

What would you call the Flintstones if they were black?
******s.

What's the difference between dog shit and ******s?
When dog shit gets old it turns White and quits stinking.

How do you stop a ****** from drowning?
Take your foot off the back of his head

How do you get a ****** out of a tree?
Cut the rope.

Why do ******s stink?
So blind people can hate them too.

What do you call 50 ******s at the bottom of the ocean?
Good start.

What is the worst 3 years of a ******s life?
First grade.


THOSE are offensive.

How many jews can you fit in a VolksWagon?
All of them if you put them in the ashtray.

When does a Black man turn into a ******?
As soon as he leaves the room.

What do you call a ****** with a Harvard education?
******.

:thumbsup :thumbsup :thumbsup :thumbsup :thumbsup

Why do police dogs lick their ass?
To get the taste of ****** out of their mouth.

What is red green yellow orange purple and pink?
A ****** dressed for church.

Did you hear that the KKK bought the movie rights to Roots?
They're going to play it backwards so it has a happy ending.

Did you hear about the new Black Barbie?
It comes with 12 kids, AIDS and a welfare check

How do you stop a ****** from going out?
Pour more gas on him.

How come Stevie Wonder & Ray Charles can't read?
They're both ******s.

What do you do if you see a ****** with half a head?
Stop laughing and reload.

Whats the differance between Afghanistan and Christmas?
Christmas will be here this year.

Whats blue and hangs in my front yard?
My ****** I can paint him whatever color I want.

Damn Labret your such a fucking cock blower....

And your boy hasnt got up with me yet ;-)))

:1orglaugh

ROFLMFAO

:Hollering

labret you're one fuckin' american dude ! :1orglaugh

damnit, would somebody post something offensive

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh

FUCK YOU :321GFY


you're welcome dublin1 :1orglaugh

:thumbsup

Q: What is the hardest part of a vegetable ?
A: The WheelChair


Q:Whats better then winning the gold in the special olympics?
A: Not being retarded

A guy works at a new job on Thursday and Friday. On Monday he calls in and says, "I can't come in today. I'm sick." He worked the rest of the week, but the following Monday he calls in and says, "I can't come in today. I'm sick."

The boss asks the foreman about him, and the foreman says, "He's great. He does the work of two men. We need him."

So the boss calls the guy into his office, and says, "You seem to have a problem getting to work on Mondays. You're a good worker and I'd hate to fire you. What's the problem? Anything we can help you with? Drugs? Alcohol?"

The guy says, "No, I don't drink or do drugs. But my brother-in-law drinks every weekend, and then beats on my sister. So every Monday morning, I go over to make sure she's all right. She puts her head on my shoulder and cries, one thing leads to another, and the next thing you know, I'm screwing her."

The boss says, "You screw your sister?"

The guy says, "Hey, I told you I was sick."

http://webcenter.newssearch.netscape...79_aolns. src

Damn, this girl died from taking a hockey puck to the melon at an NHL game.

Chaa ching! Someone just made a shitload of money.

Yeah that sucked, i really felt bad for once




and there wont be a lawsuit.... its all on the conditions of a ticket... i saw a guy lose all his teeth and broke his nose because of a puck..... they didnt have to give him anything

Thats how i spell retirement

There were these three guys, a Polish guy, an Italian guy, and a Jewish guy. They all worked together at a factory. Everyday they notice that their boss leaves work a little early. So one day they meet together and say that today when the boss leaves, they'll all leave early too.

The boss left and so did they.

The Jewish guy goes home and goes to rest so he can get an early start.

The Italian guy goes home and cooks dinner.

The Polish guy goes home and walks to his bedroom. He opens the door slowly and sees his wife in bed with his boss so he shuts the door and leaves.

The next day the Italian and Jewish guys are talking and plan to go home early again. They ask the Polish guy if he wants to leave early again and he says, "NO".

They ask him why not and he said, "because yesterday I almost got caught."

That joke is the same as one, but with a blond and brunette etc

What is red green yellow orange purple and pink?
LABRET dressed for church.
:1orglaugh

A yank and Jew are standing by the grave of a their passed away mutual friend....The yank says...shit man I owed this guy 500 bucks, takes out his wallet and throws the loot into the grave...

The jewish guy...you're right I have to come clean to I also owed him 500 bucks...He takes out the 500 bucks of the grave, writes a check for 1000 bucks and throws it into the grave!

DynaMite