I Swear Its True
 

I used to eat a lot of natural foods..................

until I learned that most people die of natural causes.

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Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it.

If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

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The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to

buy a replacement.

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Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

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There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead.

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An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.

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If quitters never win, and winners never quit, then who is the fool who said, "Quit while you're ahead?"

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Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

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The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

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Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

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Some people are like Slinkies . . . not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.

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Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

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Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to?

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Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

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How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

AND THE # 1 THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:

You read about all these terrorists --- most of them came here legally, but they hung around on these expired visas, some for as long as 10 -15 years.

Now, compare that to Blockbuster; you are two days late with a video and those people are all over you

that's a different way of lookin' at stuff I guess :)

i cant believe that nic wasnt taken looooong b4 now

go eat some mcdonalds ! :thumbsup

Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it.

If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh