Beer Vs. Pussy: The Playoff
 

1. Beer is always wet. Pussy needs a little work. - One point to BEER

2. Warm beer tastes awful. - One point to Pussy

3. A really cold beer is satisfying. - One point to BEER

4. If after taking a swig of your favorite beer you find a hair between your teeth, you may vomit. - One point to Pussy

5. Ten beers in one night and you can't drive home. Ten Pussies in one night and you don't want to drive anywhere. - One point to Pussy

6. If you have a lot of beer in a public place, your reputation may suffer. If you eat any Pussy in public, you become a legend. - One point to Pussy

7. If a cop stops you and you smell of beer you may get arrested. If you smell of Pussy he may buy you a beer. - One point to Pussy

8. You normally don't find old beer. - One point to BEER

9. Too much beer and you'll think you see flying saucers. Too much Pussy and you'll think you've seen God. - One point to PUSSY

10. In most countries there's a tax on beer. - One point to PUSSY

11. If you have another beer the first one never gets pissed off - One point to BEER

12. You can always be sure if you're the first one to open a bottle or can. - One point to BEER

13. If you shake beer it'll get all agitated but it eventually it settles down. - One point to BEER

14. You always know how much beer is going to cost - One point to BEER

15. Beer doesn't have a mother - One point to BEER

16. Beer never expects to be hugged for half an hour after you've drank it - One point to BEER

FINAL SCORE: BEER 9, PUSSY 7

That's it! The matter is settled, the clear winner is: BEER

PS: If you are a woman and at this point feel angry, degraded or discriminated, just remember that Beer would experience none of those feelings, let alone express them. - An extra point for BEER!

Kind of cute...but doubtful that any man would choose beer over pussy.

That's a good one. :)

i got a good laugh! i liked #15.

haah that is great

11. If you have another beer the first one never gets pissed off - One point to BEER:1orglaugh:thumbsup

:thumbsup pussy will always be a winner.

17. Drinking beer is always best done in with mates. One point to pussy (?)

This is a great thread!!!!

LOL that's was funny !!

What about pussy flavored beer? Or beer flavored pussy??

if your beer is yeasty, it means its probably imported, exotic, and good! - 1 point beer!

nobody wants a flat beer OR a flat woman - tie!

Every beer will give great head if poured properly. -= point beer~!

If you have too much pussy, it doesn't make bad beer taste good. - point beer.

if pussy smells bad, you can always take a shower with it, if a beer is skunked it gets poured out. POint - pussy!

if you have too much pussy, beer won't make you sleep on the couch.

If you drink beer long enough, you get a big fat belly. If you fuck a pussy long enough, SHE is going to get a big fat belly.

a bottle of beer doesn't turn to a bottle of ketchup one week out of every month

Thanks, I just learned I'm a legend. :pimp

OMG. Okay thats the best one!:1orglaugh

I vote for pussy! Entertaining! Nice Pete-KT

aww...that ain't right. :Oh crap

LOL

You are so right ! :thumbsup:thumbsup

That may be but....
 

I'll take a hot pussy over cold beer any day hehe...

And hello all

they go together like peanut butter and jelly:D

Good laughs :0

pretty cool list :1orglaugh

hehe :)

Funny post. Worth for sharing...

First time i read every single reply to a thread... this fucker delivers!

Depends on the pussy :2 cents:

:1orglaugh

Can't go wrong with either

best - post - ever

Beer doesnt try and talk to you. Point beer.
Beer doesnt have stupid friends. Point beer.
Beer thinks its a great idea to hang out and play call of duty for 6 hours. Point beer.
Beer wont get pregnant. Point beer.
Beer doesnt cry. Point beer.
Beer doesnt have to shave and wash itself to become edible. Point beer.
Beer loves internet porn. Point beer.
Beer thinks Im hilarious. Point beer.
Beer wont cheat on you. Point beer.
Beer wont call the cops when you kick it in the cunt. Point beer.

Beer doesnt make you wear a condom. Point beer.
Beer doesnt want child support. Point beer.
Beer hates Tori Amos. Point beer.
Beer doesnt want to get married. Point beer.
Beer doesnt ask me if I love it, beer knows I love it. Point beer.
Beer loves my best friend, marijuana. Point beer.
Beer has no problem with me drinking other beers. Point beer.

Amen to that! But really, does beer satisfy you like pussy can?

After I drink a beer I dont want to cleave its skull in with a hammer. Point beer.
After I drink a beer I dont have to talk to it. Point beer.
Beer. Point beer.
Beer never sends me text messages. Point beer.
I dont have take a shower after drinking beer. Point beer.