The downside of paradise
 

Okay.... so you guys think it's all bikinis and surfin' huh? (well, it is mostly,.... but for the sake of this thread, let's continue)

we were supposed to have some hurricane come through here last weekend... Hurricane Douglas I think it was... but it crapped out and went north of the islands.... great right? Wrong. That thing totally fucked up our weather here.... it's been fucking humid as hell for days... like, can't breathe kinda humid.... power went out tonight from everyone running their AC's tryin' to stay cool.... and it stinks like dead fucking fish outside.

Not only that, but these bastards:

http://www.opticalamplitude.com/stuff/centipede.jpg

are common here. That's right.... fucking COMMON. Killed one just two nights ago here.... for those of you unfamiliar, that's a fucking centipede. Yes they bite. And it feels somewhat very similar to a shotgun blast. Anywhere from 2 to 14 inches here.

Then there's the fucking Cane Spiders.... roughly about the size of a baseball, jet black, and fast as fucking greased lightning.

And of course the roaches.... about as big as your thumb..... and they fly.

Never mind the scorpions.... they're not too common. Or the sharks..... mostly tigers attacking surfers..... and rare.

But all in all.... still wouldn't trade it for anywhere else.... hehehe...... :winkwink:

Da surf kicks ass!!!!!

that looks yummy, cna u eat it raw or do you sautee em?

ya gotta watch out to avoid having a centipede up yer arse !

we have mosquitos here

they bite too

i've only been to Hawaii once (10 days, mostly maui) and i don't remember seeing anything like that - crazy

Put it in some tequila and down it.

:glugglug

:thumbsup

since we've been here, we've run into two cane spiders and one of those centipedes..... and a shitload of wasps (least of our worries).... I got probly 6 geckos in here now as permanent house guests..... and they can stay.... hell, they can invite their friends if they want.... got a few more anoles livin' out on the deck.... they can stay too.....

not too worried about much else.... sharks I can deal.... jellyfish are just a fact of life.... but the fucking centipedes man....

I can't hang with them.

Even morphine won't take that pain away.... those fuckers must DIE!!!!

so you're trying to tell us that you can't stand a centipede bite - but you'd be able to deal with having your leg chopped off by 3 rows of razorblade-sharp shark teeth ? :eek7

Oh shit! Not even Raid can help you out there! Sounds like you should pick up a good air gun and have some fun!

I take a knife with me in the water man.... sharks are solid and stupid... I can deal with them. Centipedes are sneaky bastards.... and yes, I think I'd rather have my leg bitten off than be bitten by a pede. It's just that painful.

you need to train those gecko's to attack the pedes

fuck hawaii...shit like that freaks me out.

hey... on the bright side.... we don't got NO snakes here.... :thumbsup

amp dude.. have you looked into those electric field "sharkpods"? they create a charged field around you while you're in the water thats like a punch in the nose to sharks because of the way they sense things with the pits in their snouts..
i remember reading about the surfers in south australia here (white pointer country) that would surf with screwdrivers and knives strapped to their wetsuits.. scary shit.. i fucking hate sharks..

haven't heard of those.... hafta check it out.... something that straps onto you or something?

I've only seen one shark so far... he was pretty mellow..... more alert for Man-o-War than sharks.....

Man that's a scary mother fucker. Ya better watch out Amp one of those things could get into the house and get ya while your a sleep. Maybe even bite your dick off. A shot gun to the balls.. OUCH!! FUCK THAT! :eek7

yikes! i thought i saw bad critters living in a canyon! at least those fucking pedes are colorful so you can see them. yeeks :(

http://www.seachangetechnology.com.a...odyboarder.jpg

http://www.seachangetechnology.com.au/

kinda like russians. :cool-as-a




No centipedes here, no lizards, no sharks... but we do get a SHITLOAD of these:


http://www.rochedalss.qld.edu.au/P1010012.jpg


and


http://www.thaibugs.com/images/0702f3.jpg


and


http://www.iserv.net/~pdv/flowers/Moth1.jpg



:BangBang:

Testimonials from divers using the original shark POD

?In August 99 I was trying to erode the remaining 2 tons of my yearly abalone quota, I decided to work Weirs Cove at the western end of Kangaroo Island, which normally is a difficult area with large swells, but with the right weather, a days catch there is worth 2 or 3 elsewhere.

Visibility was incredible. At a depth of 10M the his was about 35M. My bag was half full and I was working outside the cage and changing position - that?s when I saw it!

This Great White was BIG, 5M at least and coming straight in. The cage was too far away, but almost between me and the shark. It came directly towards me, but as it got to approximately 5M from the cage it shook and almost turned inside out - that?s when I realised it had hit the ?Shark POD field? that I had set up on the cage.

My relief diver had previously had a similar experience and had told me that ? Shark PODs work?. Now I believe him.?

Rene Spruyt Abalone Diver,
Kangaroo Island, South Australia



?Ever since Damon had a very bad encounter with a very large Great White at Purdie Island in 1996, we have looked into any way of avoiding another encounter with Great White Sharks. We started out by using an underwater cage unit which we found very restrictive and unsuitable for our working environment, therefore found we still needed to dive freely on hookah gear most working days.

When we saw the first Shark POD unit on the market, we looked into the type of protection it could provide us. We decided to purchase the first model which wasn¹t quite what we expected, as we needed to use a unit which had a power source on the boat and a hard wire attached to the dive hose. This unit proved unworkable, as the hard wire was too heavy for our air hose and caused it to sink to the bottom and constantly became caught on rocks, reef etc. Therefore we basically used it as a safety unit, which we kept in the boat, so it could be used in the event of another problem.

The day came when I was diving in approx. 35-40 feet off Flinders Island in low visibility, and had been in the water for about 1.5 hours. I was inflating a parachute when a Great White shark, approximately 10 feet in length, approached me. I laid flat on the bottom until Damon got the message to send the Shark POD down to me. I had seen the shark pass very close by five times in about 30 minutes, before the POD was sent down to me, switched on. I stayed on the bottom for another 15 minutes before I felt confident enough to break for the surface. From the moment the POD was in the water, I never saw the shark again. Since the Oz PODS have been available we (my bother Damon and I) have used these every time we enter the water and have found it gives us confidence to dive in most places, without the encumbrance of a cage. We have come to trust and rely on the Shark POD.?

Dion Edmunds
Abalone diver, Streaky Bay, South Australia



?I have from a young boy had an affinity with the sea, and acquired a love for diving that still continues today. I have been professionally abalone diving for some 20 years. The majority of those years I have free dived without the protection of a cage unit. It wasn?t until 2 years ago after 3 White Pointer sightings over the years, and continued pressure from my family, I decided that perhaps I was ?pushing my luck? and purchased a Shark POD.

I was however, a little sceptical of the protection that the inventors claimed the unit to have, but my doubts were short lived after my fourth confrontation.

I was diving in approx. 25 feet of water for Blacklip Abalone when the swell built up, making it too uncomfortable to work ?blacks? so I swam out to the drop off of approx. 45 feet. As I swam out, I caught sight of an 11 feet White Pointer swimming in towards me. I sat on the bottom and watched as he turned and swam along the face of me approx. 18 feet away, and then turned in toward me. I realized then that the battery was low, as the red light was on and remembered Mike telling me that fully charged, the protective electrical field is approx. 7 metres in diameter. How far was it when only half charged? The Shark kept coming straight at me, not rushing, but definitely curious. He hit the field approx. 10 feet away from me and unbelievably it was like he hit a brick wall. He turned tail and bolted leaving me in a wash. I sat on the bottom for a further few minutes but never caught sight of him again. I was that confident, even with a low battery, that I finished filling my bag and returned to the boat where my sheller was totally oblivious to the Shark.

Jeff Grocke
Abalone diver, Elliston, South Australia

dude.

what the FUCK are those things? :eek7

That thing sounds good! You should definitely get one. And get something for the house too. Don't forget what happened to Peter Brady in Hawaii
http://www.rugbyfootball.com/STP/brady_bunch.jpg

That tarantula almost killed him!

Brady Bunch goes to Hawaii.

They were cursed.

?

Paradise? With bugs that big it might be hell in disguise.

yuckie. Amp do ya have a cat? I'd keep half a dozen around, to ward off those dino-bugs. :1orglaugh

Omg, have u been to rotten.com, I'm not going to link it, and seen what happened to the maid Alice? Dude I can't even look at her now. Poor lady :\


Also,amp, I haven't ever even seen that thing with red legs. Thanks for giving me upcoming nightmares :thumbsup

Can't you get the lizards to eat the bugs in your house? Maybe you just need to get some bigger lizards.

Can those red things fuck up your cats or dogs with their bite?

ahahaha

Spiders, flies... (greenflies, flying ants, blue bottles, and horse shit flies), and moths. Common all over the world... but its kinda hot here today. There are insects all over the place. I've got my bug zapper plugged in and ready for action.

Fly into the light, you fucks. :BangBang:

sure, the lizards eat bugs.... but the pedes will eat the lizards man.... (if the pede is big enough and can catch the lizard)

yeah, they'll fuck up pretty much anything they bite I imagine.... and the fuckers are fast too.....

Damn with that many legs you'd be fast to. What about those little black boxes that emit some sort of sound that fucks up the bug? We had them when we lived in Chelsea above a take out place. Man no matter how clean we where damn roaches kept coming until my gf got those black boxes, let me look to see if I can find one to get the name.

fuel

My free tip of the Day: Fuel.....lighter woooosh!
And you're an asshole for posting those other: look-how-fucking-good-life-in-maui-is-now-drewl-coz-you-can't-afford-it pics you twat


DynaMite :thumbsup

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

those pics reinforce the real reason that i live in the real paradise: Vancouver!

Don't centipedes have 100 legs?

not as a rule.... could have 30.... could have 300... the less legs they have, the faster they move.... and they move about 20 inches per second.

20 inches a second? Fuck! No outdoor jungle fucking in Hawaii for me!

hehehehe...... "know your enemy!"

believe me, I've done my research on these bastards.... :glugglug

Too....hot.........no breeze......must breathe....
must ....... whipe sweat off neck and face.......help .....me...
i feel like im a snickers bar being shrinkwrapped

no kiddin' huh? Fuckin' heat has been a BITCH since Saturday man.....

must.... crawl.... to fridge......

.....get.... beer....... :glugglug