Watch the complete Dexter Showtime series a few times.

If you really know the person then you will know his enemies, frame one of them.

1. watch the following on body decomp (if you want him/her to vanish): http://video.google.com/videoplay?do...perfect+murder
2. learn how to pick locks, so you can leave evidence in your marks house or apartment
3. learn both your victim and marks habits and routines, pick the right time when the mark will have no alibi
4. Kill your victim at his home around 4am, leather pouch full of ball bearings to the head while sleeping, then a hypo full of over the counter poison or just a slip knot zip cord around the neck
5. bury at night at one of your marks relatives back yards or farm would be best.

problems, if both or either mark or victim sleeps with someone every night.

The homicide cops I met couldn't find their way out of a dark room

With kindness

I always liked the disposing of the body in a construction site clean up bag and then buried in an open grave prior to the next days ceremonies.

you can always visit them in the years to come and dance on their grave.

Mainstream doesn't think badly enough of this industry as it is - so why not discuss the best ways to murder someone and get away with it?!

Read OJ's book, I'm sure he puts some insights in there, seeing as how he probably wrote it from experience.

stage a robbery or car jacking

1. Tranquilize/drug the individual so they are unconscious.
2. Take the body to a secure location where no one can trace you back to. (woods as mentioned earlier).
3. Use a knife to do the killing. Much easier to dispose of and not as easily traced as a gun.
4. Dispose of the body in acid or cut it into separate pieces, each in its own bag.
5. Go far offshore and dump the remains into a large body of water.

Yea theres been a few cases like that, but without a lot of circumstantial evidence aka 'a fucking head' or 'a large bloodstain in the back seat' it's still pretty difficult to prosecute without a confession. There's a lot of guys on missing persons lists you can bet went the way of Jimmy Hoffa.

A better way is as some dudes have already mentioned, do the 'take him on a hunting trip and Dick Cheney his ass' method. Less left to chance as there's no evidence to clean up, you leave it all there and pass it off as a tragic mistake. If you've got thick skin and can handle the constant speculation that follows you the rest of your life that's the way to go. Having typed that I better never go hunting, if some drunk idiot gets shot it's on me.

All comments said for entertainment purposes with the assumption the OP is not dumb enough to actually commit a murder he wishes to get away with by methods garnered from his public forum posting.

Well, like the idiot that you are, you decided to post this on a forum.

If you are planning to kill a family member, then you will become a person of interest, and that means that the police will see this thread and you will be a pretty good suspect.

Assuming that you follow my instructions to the letter, this still won't be enough to get you convicted.

So there are 2 important steps. (1) Killing the person, and (2) Getting rid of the body.

Killing the person is very easy. You need to use poison. Put it in the food or drink or whatever. But don't purchase the poison, because then your face will be in the security cameras at Home Depot and your debit card will leave a paper trail. So get some poison from the garage.

Which brings me to the next point. If you are killing someone who lives with you, then you want to poison them at home. But you don't want anybody else to be there, or to be expecting them. So if you are planning to kill your wife, and she works Monday to Friday, then you should kill her on Friday night. This way, you have the whole weekend to dispose of the body. If you killed her on Monday night, then her work will be wondering where the hell she is on Tuesday morning. And you would have been expected to file a missing persons report by then, but you are still disposing of the body.

If you kill her on Friday night, you can dispose of the body on Saturday, and tell the police that she disappeared on Sunday. So when she doesn't show up to work on Monday, your story checks out and the body is gone.

Now, if you are planning to kill your friend, that is a bit more difficult. You can't do it at your house, because he will drive over to your house. So he will be dead, and his car will be on your driveway. And if you drive it away and ditch it, people will see you. And you can't pick him up from his house either, because people will see you.

So this is a bit more work finding a location. The key point is that you need a place where nobody will see you. So his house might work if you go there walking, or park your car far away, and nobody else is home for a while. So that would be hard to determine. Maybe if his wife went on a trip for a few days, that would work.

Your best bet is anti-freeze or methanol. Both work very well, and you can add it to his beer or dinner or whatever. You only need a little. Don't use a syringe because then you have to get rid of his syringe.

Now we get into another important issue. If you are killing your wife, then you have to get rid of the body. Otherwise, the murder investigation will find out that she was poisoned, and you were the only one near her. But if you are killing your friend, you could put the poison in his beer or in his insulin or in his medication. Then he won't die for a few more days, and nobody will know that it was you. This gives you the benefit of not needing to get rid of the body.

It has to be something that only he eats, drinks, uses etc.. So if he shares his beer, then that is not a good idea.

So either way, you can't kill with stabbing or shooting or whatever. That puts blood stains everywhere. And you can't clean the bloodstain. If you do, you will have bloody paper towels, and they go to the garbage. If the police haven't gone through your garbage, you will leave iron residue (from the blood) all over the carpet and the floor. The police can see this. And the neighbors will hear the screams.

So lets say that you have a body and need to get rid of it. Some idiots here have said to put it into a wood chipper or slice it up. That creates blood and mess and it leaves DNA behind. And you have to get the body to the wood chipper.

So what you need to do is take the body to the basement and put it in a giant plastic container. Then fill this container with acid. The body will dissolve, and then you will take the resulting liquid and pour it down the sewer drain in your basement (assuming that your basement is unfinished). Otherwise, you can pour it down the toilet. In order to not make a mess, you need to scoop out the liquid with a smaller container (make sure to wear rubber gloves).

Now the real question is what container do you use and what kind of acid? Well, it depends on what you have around the house. Actually, I should say that you need to use a base. Sodium Hydroxide is the best, also known as lye.

You need to make sure that you have good ventilation. Otherwise you will generate a build-up of toxic fumes.

Ideally you want to get the lye solid and then mix it with water. But most importantly, you want to add a little bit of lye and a little bit of water to the plastic container, and then wait. Then repeat the process. The reason for this is because it produces a lot of heat and you do not want to melt the container.

You want to buy the lye and the container at least a month before the killing, so that there is no trace. Pay cash, and if necessary, purchase a little bit of lye from different locations. Lowes sells Drain Cleaner that is 100% lye and you can get a 2lb bag. Make sure that it is 100%. Then you want to take it home and empty the bag into a different bag (making sure that it is air tight). Hide it in a cool place. Now you will take the original bag that the lye came in and dump it in a garbage bin behind a drive thru or something.

So after a month, you have all of this lye, and no bag that you have to throw out.

You want to get a polypropylene container. You can tell because it has a number 5 on the bottom of the container. You do not want to get any other type of plastic because they are not as resistant to the lye.

Once you are done, you need to wash the container very very well and put it in your garage. Get it a little dusty and fill it with junk so that nobody notices it. And take your gloves and cut them up and flush them down the toilet. Now that it is in the drain system, nobody will ever know what happened.

1.Shot him in a face with deagle .
2.Cut him to little pieces, and feed the pigs.

maybe all the stuff on csi is all hollywood bullshit?

what about taking a shotgun, shooting the person, and walking away.

if no one sees you go there, and you drop no dna... think about this


shotgun leaves no riffling to trace the bullets.

ensure clean clothing/shoes and leave no dna



come down to prove it or confess.................


so tell me - where are the holes in this plan? could they really prove this?

Sorry, trade secret.

legal disclaimer - researching ideas for a book i may write someday

no more ideas?

I would first ask myself -- How do professionals do it? On TV and in movies they always wear gloves, use a silenced handgun, leave no witnesses or evidence. That means doing it somewhere where no one else is around, and they dig out the bullets afterwards.

They either rob the victim (money, watch, jewelry etc) to make it look like that was the motivation, or else do the hit so precisely and cleanly as to make it look like an execution-style professional hit (something you yourself shouldn't be capeable of to people who know you), OR they're good enough to scare the victim into making a fatal mistake while attempting to escape that ends their life via a fall or drowning so that bullets and bullet holes aren't even needed.

Hey, we have a pretty dangerous fast-moving river here in the 'peg... and there's already been some drownings in it lately. I'm a strong swimmer but someone would have to pay my family a few mill before I'd even consider trying to cross it. There you go, ready made alibi.

Of course you know I'll be watching the news, and will turn you in for the crimestoppers reward in a heartbeat. :D

just kill yourself after you shot the person. that way you definitely get away with it.

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

Get married. It's a slow and torturous death

1. remove motive
2. remove body
3. remove evidence
4. remove suspicion

2a. remove teeth
:thumbsup

It's rumored that Brick Top's favorite means of dispatch involves a stun gun, a plastic bag, a roll of tape, and a pack of hungry pigs.

Having watched tons of episodes of American Justice and City Confidential in the past, I probably know more than I should. Some ingenius methods used and sometimes only the smallest screw up allowed authorities to catch the perp. It's no wonder so many murders go unsolved.

make them read gfy everyday , maybe they will go insane and kill themselves

Actually, its disconcerting how "circumstantial evidence" can lead prosecutors/judge/jury astray - particularly if you look closely at the Baltovich case. But you're right...there's been several 'slipped-thru-the-cracks' cases like that.

I put that one out as an example since it was the most blatant no-body instance I could think of - plus it was fairly local to me.

There are some way to detailed answers in this thread.

First you should post about it on a message board.

I thought that, too.

But its nothin' you can't see/hear on any of the crime shows (or books) these days.

The wife and I watch Criminal Minds and L&O fairly religiously...and sometimes I wonder do the investigators always use all those scientific resources at their disposal for every case? Or just certain cases?

my weapon of choice would be: poison
here are some interesting links:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thallium
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0115033/

I watch all that shit too and could no where near provide as detailed answers as some here.

get to work like police agent working on murders, kill that person, and investigate that person death.