I would seriously get in touch with those people from that show, some of those interventionists and counselors do that OFF the camera. And they know other people who do it. The interventions are a great thing to do and may wake up your cousin, especially if a former addict can tell them how successful they are in life now!

Thanks Lori. It is indeed bad, but my attitude is changing more and more which makes it easier (Missy: make note of this!).

Baddog really has a point. It's not easy to see family (and in my case the mother of my 2 year old son) slipping, but you have to let them go. And yes, they will blame you for everything, you won't believe some of the things I get blamed for. It almost got to me few months back, but I was strong enough to take the blame and move on.

Nobody can step in and force them get help. simple rock bottom. May be jail. Maybe suicide attempt.

well, to tell you truth, my answer to that is a question to you. who are you trying to save here? your sister or the kids? because at this point, after reading each your posts a few times, i'm not sure what your goal is here. it sounds to me like you mostly want to get the kids in a safe environment more than getting your sister clean. although you haven't really stated anything showing that their safety is truly in jeopardy- sure letting them run around unsupervised and unfed is wrong but not necc. unsafe, depends on many things.

so i guess my point is this, if you want your sister to deal with her addiction you have to do nothing, even your family has turned away from her (as you mentioned).

if you want to *save* the kids, then fuck her and her addiction and get the kids, i don't know the best way for you to do that, i'm more versed at getting drunks and druggies help.

Very good advice.

It's a good question. The initial goal was to "save" my sister and her husband - before things get to the point where something happens to the kids that will be irreversible. So I guess the answer is... both. From everything I have been reading here and learning on my own though, the first goal is pretty much pointless, so I believe that now the goal has shifted more toward the second part - which is just making sure that they aren't going to take their kids down this path with them.

None of us want to wait to find out if their rock bottom will involve the kids somehow. That may not happen, but it's a very real possibility and we don't want to have to find out the hard way. I have only given a couple of the examples I know of that make me feel like the kids could be in jeopardy, but it only takes one time for their 5-year-old to find the drugs that one of their friends have left laying around... and none of us would ever forgive ourselves. We also don't want to wait until the state steps in to remove the kids and place them in the foster care system.

So I guess the real answer is that the ideal goal is to save both, but if nothing can be done to help my sister and her husband, our main focus is just making sure that my nephews are in a safe environment while the parents run their course.

BTW, would you mind if I hit you up on ICQ to chat some time?

Well, Missy, since my daughter is in the business of taking kids away from crack heads I would suggest that one of you step up and do it before the county does.

Question: Can a family member take steps to get legal temporary custody without having CPS (or similar) involved? Or once you get involved in the legal system is that part mandatory?

Intervention.

Pretty sure once you go for legal, unless your sister signs them over, the court is going to get CPS involved to investigate your ability to provide a safe place for the kids. I would consult a Family Law attorney.

American Cannibal.

:2 cents: