Money always...always changes things.

Which is why it wasn't in the cassette player to begin with.:)

People still own cassettes and have cassette players in their cars?

another one that I never gave much thought to, but gets more profound to me by the day.

Ignorance is bliss.

Ohhh the freedom that being a completely clueless dumbass must bring.

- never trust nobody, you on your on
- money can buy anything and everything

I would go crazy with your paranoia.

- Always do what you promise to do

-Everytime you get lost you will land up in the bad part of town

-Most people that call themselves your friend only like you because you have something they need or want.

-Spreading rumors is always a bad idea

-Dont lick strange pussy

-Dont grow up too fast

-Doing for others without expecting anything is return will give you a warm fuzzy inside

How am I paranoid?

i learnt that coffee is a god that makes the mornings go away

I have learned to always tell the truth..its easier to keep track of..

And now you're forgetful? Argh.

You've admitted several times that you're very paranoid. IRS, government, women, cats, servals, etc. Remember now?

they always fuck you at the drive-thru

- a friend with weed is a friend indeed

If you want something done exactly how you want it, you have to do it yourself

Taking the higher road saves you time and stress

Do whatever you can to put people at ease when you speak to them, make a joke, smile, whatever. They are easier work with when it is cordial.

Listen to your mama

0-26....

Here's mine!

Anything worth having is worth working hard for.

People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones..

Clean your own house before starting on others houses...

Hey your right.. :1orglaugh

The visual of Martin sitting there trying to lick his own elbow.. is just tooo much!

Can we have a actual photo of it? please 0 please

Never try to walk while you're peeing. You'll get your pants wet.
(Supreme advice for those of you who insist on waiting till after the bar closes to take your 10 min beer piss in the alley out back).

:winkwink:

This thread could be a long thread, but here's some other stuff I've learned along the way:

-- Some women talk because they want to solve a problem. Others talk because they just want someone to listen. Knowing to tell the difference serves a man well in life.

-- [I learned this with my mom's passing last year] When you die, you will be judged by the living based on your compassion, your kindness, and your gifts to others. [Being tough, rich, or a stud...normally die with you. Unless you've taken those skills to notable extremes.]

-- The most enjoyable things in life can't be bought. A dish well cooked. Watching the sunrise together after talking through each other's problems. A smile that comes to your face when you realize something or you've solved a problem.

-- Denial and Delusion cast aside, the number one thing people desire in this world is acceptance. Similarly, the number one thing people hate in this world is rejection.

-- Love exists, it just takes a while to recognize it.

When your 5 year old daughter says "fuck" in her tiny little voice at home, it's cute, when she does it in public, you find a table to crawl under fast enough.........

The credit belongs to he man who is actually in the arena ....

There is no spoon.

Never go to a 9-5 job, and like it.

Never offer a lift to someone when you don't know the destination.

There is a master plan. But, I'm not going to tell you what it is. :)

Never believe someone who says "it's not about the money" and run very fast and far away from that person.

I have learned not to ask anymore a question to your loved one unless you are really ready to get an answer. May times I asked a question and didn't want to hear the answer, when I than received the answer I didn't want to hear, I was devastated.

So, unless you really really want to have the answer to a question you rather he/she lies to you prepare yourself or don't ask it.

shit... I say that all the time. In-fact I think it's in my profile here or was..

Damn I knew I was doomed

:helpme

- No matter how many guarantees you are given, if the person doesn't keep his word with the simplest of things, then he's not worth doing a minute of your time.

- Give without expecting anything in return.

- Help whoever wants to help themselves

- Know your enemy and watch your friends

Always give without expecting anything in return.

Oh and this one too...
Never take advice from someone who isn't doing better than you are.

:thumbsup

Never believe someone who says "it's not about the money" and run very fast and far away from that person.

-------------------------

i so agree with you... =)

My (fictional) mentor himself...
http://www.bobgod.com/writer/lazaruslong.html

to which I will add another wise man's advice...
"Never whistle when you're pissing, and don't ask questions when you're being blown."

Hmm...Seemed to have duped someone elses'

How bout,

Life doesn't always turn out as planned. ;)

Here's one I tell my kids:

Life's not fair - get over it

Money can't buy you happiness but it allows you to choose your miseries.

ahh just thought of somemore


-life sucks then you DIE.

-Let he who is without sin cast the first stone

-Opinions are like assholes, everyone has one

-Everything that can go wrong Will!

-Eat your Veggies

-you only get about 5 real friends in life
-never trust ANY woman
-never trust ANYONE you havnt know for 5 years
-shoot first ask questions later

great!

disagree about money though: money buys totally nothing.

Also, see what behaviour (lying, cheating, violence) certain people are afraid of and beware that what they are afraid of is exactly what You can get from them.

- Don't be friends with anyone, but be friendly to everyone.

- Desiring something makes it extraordinary, aquiring makes it ordinary.

- To find someone you can trust completely, visit the nearest cemetary. Everyone changes.

- There are two ways to be weathy. 1: Get more 2: Want less

- People will meet your expectations as long as you don't have any.

- If you can't give something without caring whether it gets returned or paid back, don't give it.

Hoes don't come before bros!

I heard that one last week and it totally made sense.

:)

DH

You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows...

it's all fun and games until someone get's their scrotum caught in the door....

life's a bitch, then you marry one....


better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick...but what ISN'T better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick...


don't shit where you eat....

This is not a rehearsal so live every moment as if it's your last.