These are "THE RULES"!!!! - GoFuckYourself.com

Morgan · 10-25-2002, 01:42 PM

We always hear "the rules" from the feminine side. Ok,
we now hear the guys' side. These are our rules!

Please note ... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl.
If it's up, put it down.

1. Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find
the perfect present yet again!

1. Sometimes, we are not thinking about you. Live with
it.

1. Do not ask us what we are thinking about... unless
you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint,
the shotgun, Internet sites and gadgets.

1. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the
changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport, and no, we are never going
to think of it that way.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything
you wear is fine. Really.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask! For what you want. Let us be clear on this
one: subtle hints do not work...strong hints do not
work ... obvious hints do not work...Just say it!

1. We don't remember dates...mark anniversaries on a
calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.

1. Most guys own three pair of shoes, tops. What makes
you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out
of thirty, would look good with your dress?

1. Yes, and No are perfectly acceptable answers..to
almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help
solving it...That's what we do. Sympathy is what your
girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that last for 17 months is a problem.
See a doctor.

1. Check you own oil! Please.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an
argument...In fact, all comments become null and void
after 7 days.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways,
and one of the ways make's you sad or angry, we meant
the other one.

1. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's
genetic.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us
how you want it done, not both. If you already know
best how to do it, just do it.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to
say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and
neither do we.

1. The relationship is never going to be like it was
the first two months we were going out...Get over
it...And quit whining to your girlfriends.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default
settings...Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color
...Pumpkin is also a fruit...We have no idea what
mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched...We do that.

1. We are not mind readers and we never will be...Our
lack of mind reading ability is not proof of how
little we care about you.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we
will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying,
but it's just not worth the hassle.

1. I'm in shape. ROUND is a shape.

- Just so we see eye to eye!

Ace-Ace · 10-25-2002, 01:42 PM

hahahaha

Amputate Your Head · 10-25-2002, 01:44 PM

cool.... but they're all numbered 1

Morgan · 10-25-2002, 01:45 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Amputate Your Head
cool.... but they're all numbered 1

Because they are all equally important!

jreaka · 10-25-2002, 01:46 PM

Holy shit!!!!!

I need to get this to my wife ASAP!!!!!!!

mastamindz · 10-25-2002, 01:47 PM

Printed and put on my girlfriends desk.

dimonka · 10-25-2002, 01:47 PM

Funny... Heh, LOL

CowboyAtHeart · 10-25-2002, 02:07 PM

you forgot:

1. If I didn't think you were pretty, I wouldn't have married you. Now stop asking.

10-25-2002, 01:42 PM	#1
Morgan Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: May 2002 Location: Corona Del Mar, CA Posts: 10,520	These are "THE RULES"!!!! We always hear "the rules" from the feminine side. Ok, we now hear the guys' side. These are our rules! Please note ... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE! 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. 1. Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again! 1. Sometimes, we are not thinking about you. Live with it. 1. Do not ask us what we are thinking about... unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun, Internet sites and gadgets. 1. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. 1. Shopping is NOT a sport, and no, we are never going to think of it that way. 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really. 1. Crying is blackmail. 1. Ask! For what you want. Let us be clear on this one: subtle hints do not work...strong hints do not work ... obvious hints do not work...Just say it! 1. We don't remember dates...mark anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand. 1. Most guys own three pair of shoes, tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress? 1. Yes, and No are perfectly acceptable answers..to almost every question. 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it...That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. 1. A headache that last for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor. 1. Check you own oil! Please. 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument...In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days. 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways make's you sad or angry, we meant the other one. 1. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic. 1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done, not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it. 1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials. 1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we. 1. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out...Get over it...And quit whining to your girlfriends. 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings...Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color ...Pumpkin is also a fruit...We have no idea what mauve is. 1. If it itches, it will be scratched...We do that. 1. We are not mind readers and we never will be...Our lack of mind reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you. 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it's just not worth the hassle. 1. I'm in shape. ROUND is a shape. - Just so we see eye to eye! __________________ PornstarPlatinum.com \| TransErotica.com

10-25-2002, 01:42 PM	#2
Ace-Ace Confirmed User Join Date: May 2002 Location: Dayton, OH, USA Posts: 1,863	hahahaha __________________ JamPlay.com - Online, video-based guitar lessons

10-25-2002, 01:44 PM	#3
Amputate Your Head There can be only one Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Somewhere else Posts: 39,075	cool.... but they're all numbered 1 __________________ SIG TOO BIG

10-25-2002, 01:47 PM	#6
mastamindz Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Canada Posts: 3,547	Printed and put on my girlfriends desk. __________________ If you click here, you will make money.

10-25-2002, 01:47 PM	#7
dimonka Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 477	Funny... Heh, LOL __________________ Find out what REBILLS are!

10-25-2002, 01:46 PM	#5
jreaka Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: California Posts: 1,096	Holy shit!!!!! I need to get this to my wife ASAP!!!!!!!

10-25-2002, 02:07 PM	#8
CowboyAtHeart Registered User Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 94	you forgot: 1. If I didn't think you were pretty, I wouldn't have married you. Now stop asking.