English... oh, what a lovely language! (READ) - GoFuckYourself.com

czarina · 07-07-2008, 06:28 AM

We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,
But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes.
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice,
Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.

If the plural of man is always called men,
Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?
If I speak of my foot and show you my feet,
And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?
Then one may be that, and three would be those,
Yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
But though we say mother, we never say methren.
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim!

Let's face it -English is a crazy language.
There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger;
neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
English muffins weren't invented in England .
We take English for granted, but if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square,
and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing,
grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
Sometimes I think all the folks who grew up speaking English should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.
In what other language do people
recite at a play and play at a recital?
We ship by truck but send cargo by ship.
We have noses that run and feet that smell.
We park in a driveway and drive in a parkway.
And how can a slim chance and a fat chance be the
same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out,
and in which an alarm goes off by going on.
And, in closing, if Father is Pop, how come Mother's not Mop?

Kard63 · 07-07-2008, 06:33 AM

neat stuff

MaDalton · 07-07-2008, 06:37 AM

funnnay

pornguy · 07-07-2008, 06:43 AM

Hahahhaha... Way to much to think about.

tranza · 07-07-2008, 07:09 AM

That's true..hahaha

sniperwolf · 07-07-2008, 10:06 AM

Quality!

That's called complexity of language?!

cranki · 07-07-2008, 10:08 AM

lol, I read that in school

TubeTitans_SusieQ · 07-07-2008, 10:22 AM

thats really cute

ManufacturingMan · 07-07-2008, 10:45 AM

how darling

carol.prime · 07-07-2008, 12:48 PM

that's the magic of English language..

Vick! · 07-07-2008, 12:57 PM

B-U-T = But

P-U-T = Put

;)

ProducerCashDave · 07-07-2008, 01:00 PM

Thats america

cykoe6 · 07-07-2008, 01:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ProducerCashDave

Thats america

Ummmmm yea. Because only in America do people speak English.

07-07-2008, 06:28 AM	#1
czarina Webmaster Extraordinaire Industry Role: Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: A beautiful beach... Posts: 10,748	English... oh, what a lovely language! (READ) We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes, But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes. One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese, Yet the plural of moose should never be meese. You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice, Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice. If the plural of man is always called men, Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen? If I speak of my foot and show you my feet, And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet? If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth, Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth? Then one may be that, and three would be those, Yet hat in the plural would never be hose, And the plural of cat is cats, not cose. We speak of a brother and also of brethren, But though we say mother, we never say methren. Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him, But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim! Let's face it -English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England . We take English for granted, but if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Sometimes I think all the folks who grew up speaking English should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what other language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? We ship by truck but send cargo by ship. We have noses that run and feet that smell. We park in a driveway and drive in a parkway. And how can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out, and in which an alarm goes off by going on. And, in closing, if Father is Pop, how come Mother's not Mop?

07-07-2008, 06:33 AM	#2
Kard63 Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: 237 619 975 Posts: 8,944	neat stuff __________________

07-07-2008, 06:37 AM	#3
MaDalton I am Amazing Content! Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2004 Posts: 39,829	funnnay __________________ AmazingContent.com - providing only the best content and service since 2003 Monetize your content on Veegaz.com - one of Germanies largest VOD sites Got German traffic? We convert it into money for you! Skype: madalton02826 - Email: oltecconsult [at] gmail [dot] com

07-07-2008, 06:43 AM	#4
pornguy Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Homeless Posts: 62,911	Hahahhaha... Way to much to think about. __________________ PornGuy skype me pornguy_epic AmateurDough The Hottes Shemales online! TChicks.com \| Angeles Cid \| Mariana Cordoba \| MAILERS WELCOME!

07-07-2008, 07:09 AM	#5
tranza ICQ: 197-556-237 Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: BRASIL !!! Posts: 57,559	That's true..hahaha __________________ I'm just a newbie.

07-07-2008, 10:06 AM	#6
sniperwolf Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 17,743	Quality! That's called complexity of language?! __________________ ~Accepting design works~

07-07-2008, 10:08 AM	#7
cranki Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Café del Mar Posts: 5,162	lol, I read that in school

07-07-2008, 10:22 AM	#8
TubeTitans_SusieQ Confirmed User Join Date: May 2007 Location: Sunny Florida Posts: 3,884	thats really cute __________________ Make $40 on Every FREE Lifetime Registration ICQ: 370399852

07-07-2008, 10:45 AM	#9
ManufacturingMan Confirmed User Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Midwest Posts: 518	how darling __________________ All domains must sell, email me to make a deal. I'll entertain all reasonable offers. EMAIL: [email protected]

07-07-2008, 12:48 PM	#10
carol.prime Confirmed User Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Manila, Philippines Posts: 6,960	that's the magic of English language.. __________________ Prime Outsourcing \| offshore staffing solutions \| manual labor \| employee leasing \| full time employees starting at $695.00/month = managed and dedicated icq.: 309570461 live chat

07-07-2008, 12:57 PM	#11
Vick! Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: 20 00'24.00" N, 75 09'00.00 W Posts: 6,882	B-U-T = But P-U-T = Put ;) __________________ Affordable Quality Web Hosting

07-07-2008, 01:00 PM	#12
ProducerCashDave Confirmed User Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: In Your Brain Posts: 3,983	Thats america __________________ 15 Exclusive Sites By Top Brand Name Studios! $25 PPS \| 50% Revshare \| 5% Webmaster Referral David K. \| Account Manager \| www.ProducerCash.com ICQ: 480757149 \| david AT producercash DOT com TOLL FREE: 877-549-1112