Pleasurepays

another usefull guide to compliment this brilliant thread - http://www.gofuckyourself.com/showthread.php?t=785767


Choose your baby carefully.

This cannot be over-stated. Be sure to always find a baby that is not attended by the father or one where the father is not in the immediate area. Punching a baby with the father present can be a big mistake. The mother? Not really an issue because you can just punch her as well.

Make sure you have a clear shot at the babies face.

There is no satisfaction to be had with glancing blows. What you are looking for is a good, solid jab right or better yet, a solid hook to the mouth and/or nose of the baby for maximum baby punching pleasure.

Sleeping babies are very good for this because their is less chance of unsuspected or erratic movement of the head, resulting in a less than desirable punch.

Breast feeding babies are good if you feel you have a stronger hook than jab you might want to wait for a breast feeding baby. You are guaranteed to not only get a good shot to the baby's temple but you will get to see a little tit and some nipple at the same time.

Plan Your Escape

Suprisingly, punching babies in the face is often frowned upon by a narrow minded society bent on restricting your personal freedoms. As such, I have found that you might want to plan your escape BEFORE punching the baby. Awareness is key here. What are your surroundings? Where are the exits? Is there anyone around you that looks like they might not appreciate your hobby and block your escape? Are there any weapons around that you might use? Maybe you brought a kitchen knife with you that might be usefull in slicing your way through an annoying crowd of onlookers?

SmokeyTheBear

well i have to say some of the other stuff has offended me worse.

Obviously punching babies is not funny and by all rights it should be one of those things you dont joke about , BUT, i think it all depends on how the joke is told.

I found it hard to keep a straight face reading that.. I could see this as a "MADtv" sketch or troy mcclure psa



it was off the wall enough to be funny without really being offensive because it's obviously not the true sentiments of the author

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Pleasurepays

hmm... i bet if i wrote some fake articles about the new and growing problem of punching babies in the face lke that "40 midgets vs a lion" hoax written on a fake BBC page, people would go batshit. in todays world, it almost sounds believable.

bronco67

I love the last line. that made me chuckle.

Pleasurepays

as was once said...

Proper
Prior
Planning
Prevents
Piss
Poor
Performance

Meta man

Minusonebit's how to posts made this baby cry.

Stick to posting webmaster passwords on your "security" blog.