The Official OCCash Is A Joke Thread (tell your best joke and win $100 Epass)

[RogerV]

Three women were talking about their love lives.

The first said, "My husband is like a Rolls-Royce; smooth and sophisticated."

The second said, "Mine is like a porsche; fast and powerful."

The third said, "Mine is like an old Chevy. It needs a hand start and I have to jump on while it's still going."

[xxxjay]

Originally Posted by spacedog

New York City was having a problem with pigeons of epidemic proportions.
The citizens were in an uproar because the pesky pigeons were everywhere.
Shitting on pedestrians, flying through traffic, causing a ruckus.. The citizens were beginning to protest.

The mayor tried everything to get rid of the pesky pigeons, but no matter how hard the officials tried, nothing would get rid of them..

With his hands in the air, on live television, the mayor exclaims, "I'll pay one million dollars to anyone who can rid New York City of these damn pigeons! No questions asked, just come get rid of them."


......


The next day a man walks into the mayors office & says to the mayor,
"So, is it true that you'll pay me one million dollars if I get rid of all your pigeons?" to which the mayor replied, "That's right.. do what ever it takes, just ged rid of them.".

The man replies to the mayor, "You got yourself a deal, but it'll cost you another million dollars if you ask a question."

The man leaves the mayors office & heads to the Brooklyn Bridge.
Upon arrival, he opens his coat & pulls out a box. He opens up the box & out comes a pink pigeon. The man throws the pink pigeon in the air & the pink pigeon begins flying in wide circles around the city..

All of a sudden, all the pigeons all over New York City came to the sky & were following the pink pigeon...


The pink pigeon headed back to the bridge.. all the pigeons followed,,,

Fying in circles in the sky over the bridge, gazillions of pigeons circling around with a pink pigeon in the lead when all of a sudden the pink pigeon nose dived right into the water.. all the other pigeons followed...

The pink pigeon swam all the way to the bottom.. all the other pigeons followed.. Once at the bottom, the pink pigeon turned around & swam out the river.. but all the other pigeons drowned...

The man put the pink pigeon back in his box & headed to the mayors office...

Upon arrival at the mayors office, the man was greeted by the happy mayor who said to him. "Oh my, I am so damn happy.. we tried everything, damn I am so glad you came to help, oh, and as promised, here's your two million dollars..."

Confused, the man says, "I though the deal was for one million dollars?"

The mayor replies, "Oh, yes, but I do have one question...""




























"You wouldn't happen to have a pink nigger in a box, would you?"

Spacedog...you are the winner of the 100$ epass...I really have to give the 100$ on a racist joke because I am not down with that shit...it was just the funniest joke, that's all...please contact [email protected] to collect your prize!

[pornpf69]

congrats to the winner!!

[NTSS]

Not funny at all...and anybody who claims to be "not down with that shit" shouldn't find it funny either.

It's a shame you had to reward his racist joke with all the good quality humor posted.

[xxxjay]

Originally Posted by NTSS

Not funny at all...and anybody who claims to be "not down with that shit" shouldn't find it funny either.

It's a shame you had to reward his racist joke with all the good quality humor posted.

Come on dood? I knew somebody was gonna go down this road...if it's funny, it's funny. You can make any jokes you want about Irish or Italians and I won't give a fuck.

Racism sucks. Funny jokes about it don't.

[Quentin]

It's too late for the contest, but a great joke regardless.

Q: Why did Jesus die on the cross?
A: Because he forgot his safe word.

My favorite joke to tell around Easter and Christmas.

- Q.