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Old 06-26-2007, 06:32 PM   #1
SilentKnight
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Newfies declare war on George W. Bush!

President George Bush was in the Oval Office wondering which country to invade next, when his telephone rang.
"Hallo, President Bush?" a heavily accented voice said. "This is Archie up 'ere at the Harp Seal Pub in Badger's Cover, Newfoundland, Canada eh? I am callin' to tells ya dat we are officially declaring war on you eh!"
"Well Archie," George replies, "This is indeed important news! How big is your army?"
"Right now," said Archie, after a moment's calculation, "There is myself, me cousin Harold, me next-door-neighbour Mick, and the whole dart team from the pub. That makes eight!"
George paused. "I must tell you Archie, that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command."
"Holy jeez," said Archie. "I'll have ta call ya back!"

Sure enough, the next day Archie called again. "Mr. Bush, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"
"And what equipment would that be Archie?" George asks.
"Well sir, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Harry's farm tractor."
President Bush sighed. "I must tell you Archie, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armoured personnel carriers. Also, I've increased my army to one and a half million since we last spoke."
"Lord T'underin' Jaysus, bye," said Archie, "I'll be gettin' back to ya."

Sure enough, Archie rang again the next day. "President Bush, the war is still on! We have managed to git ourselves airborne! We up an' modified Harrigan's ultra-light wit a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and four byes from the Legion have joined us as well!"
George was silent for a moment then cleared his throat. "I must tell you Archie that I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000 fighter planes. My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!"
"Jeysus, Mary and Joseph," said Archie, "I'll have ta call youse back."

Sure enough, Archie called again the next day. "President Bush! I am sorry to have to tell you dat we have had to call off dis 'ere war."
"I'm sorry to hear that," said George. "Why the sudden change of heart?"

"Well, sir," said Archie, "we've all sat ourselves down and had a long chat over a bunch of pints, and come to realize dat dere's no way we can feed two million prisoners."

CANADIAN CONFIDENCE CANNOT BE SHAKEN!
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Old 06-26-2007, 07:08 PM   #2
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hahahhahaahaha
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Old 06-26-2007, 08:59 PM   #3
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Old 06-26-2007, 09:04 PM   #4
DaddyHalbucks
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Alcohol can be a powerful confidence builder.
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Old 06-26-2007, 09:04 PM   #5
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LMFAO HAHA Great joke!!
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Old 06-26-2007, 09:06 PM   #6
UniversalPass Pete
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nice!
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Old 06-26-2007, 09:14 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by DaddyHalbucks View Post
Alcohol can be a powerful confidence builder.
They're newfies, sitting on their ass and getting drunk is a way of life...
I love newfies..
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Old 06-26-2007, 09:15 PM   #8
LadyMischief
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Hahahh that's fucking awesome, and SO newf :P
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Old 06-26-2007, 09:26 PM   #9
alwaysex
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lol hahaha
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Old 06-26-2007, 09:32 PM   #10
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So true.

1812
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Old 06-26-2007, 10:28 PM   #11
V_RocKs
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I'd hit it, 2x's!
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Old 06-26-2007, 10:34 PM   #12
Angry Jew Cat - Banned for Life
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So true.

1812
Revive the war of 1812!!!!!
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Old 06-27-2007, 01:12 AM   #13
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LMFAO HAHA Great joke!!
What joke? It's a true story.
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Last edited by Fizzgig; 06-27-2007 at 01:13 AM..
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Old 06-27-2007, 05:43 AM   #14
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hehe
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Old 06-27-2007, 06:09 AM   #15
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hhahahahaaaahhhhaaaahahahaha
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Old 06-27-2007, 06:12 AM   #16
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Good one. Talking dogs are so funny ;-)
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Old 06-27-2007, 06:12 AM   #17
Dennis69
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Originally Posted by ismokeblunts View Post
They're newfies, sitting on their ass and getting drunk is a way of life...
I love newfies..

We love you to
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Old 06-27-2007, 06:15 AM   #18
JayDeeZee
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Newfies are great folks! Especially the chicks
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Old 06-27-2007, 08:14 AM   #19
Doug E
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Crazy Newfs, havnt hear that in a while man
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Old 06-27-2007, 11:00 AM   #20
PennyLane (not Flame)
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hahahahhaahha!!!!
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See Who The Fuck I Am At AdultWhosWho.com!

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Old 06-27-2007, 11:08 AM   #21
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didn't have the chance to read this yesterday... great one!
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Old 06-27-2007, 11:09 AM   #22
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hahahahaha... laughed my ass off

"Lord T'underin' Jaysus, bye," said Archie, "I'll be gettin' back to ya." hahaha
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Old 06-27-2007, 11:12 AM   #23
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I'm not reading all that!!

Cliff notes please..
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Old 06-27-2007, 02:34 PM   #24
SilentKnight
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I'm not reading all that!!

Cliff notes please..
ADHD is a real handicap, eh?
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