12 ways you can make a show / Internext a true success. Midgetarmy, post-Miami.

[Cory W]

http://www.midgetarmy.com/2006/08/08...t-a-porn-show/

I have worked in the Adult online industry now for six years. I have traveled to industry gatherings all over the world. The following twelve tips are tips that if combined and followed, are sure to make you the one person at the show that everyone will remember. These tips historically proven effective.




Do not say ?thanks? for anything, this includes, but is not limited to: Cab fares, dinners, drink tabs, valet tips, events. By saying thanks, you totally isolate yourself as someone who has respect for others; this will give others the impression that you are ?weak.? And don?t feel sorry for those that do pay your tab, they have a ton of money and it is no big deal to them.

Plus, you deserve first class treatment.




If you want to speak to someone, please do not be inconvenienced by them talking to others or sitting in a business meeting. Be aggressive, walk right up to them and grab their shoulder and say, ?I need you step aside so I can talk to you.?

Remember, you are a future playa, one day you will roll like the head nigga in charge, don?t let anyone think that you aren?t important.



Always insult your former company. Potential employers will view this as your being driven to be better than others. They will quickly realize that the company that let you go is ?retarded.?


Whatever you do, do not attend a gay party. If you attend one, you will magically become attractive and gay guys will try to fag out on you. Only do business with straight people, they are the only ones with traffic. Plus, you don?t want all your message board pals thinking you are light in the loafers.

Always remember, you want people that post a lot on message boards to think you are cool.




Name drop. And don?t just name-drop anyone, name-drop a message board personality. This will add extra awesomeness to your already awesome show, it will validate you as someone that people like and respect.


Whenever someone is talking to you, quickly cut him or her off and segue the conversation with a ?one up on him or her.? Remember, you already know everything there is to know, don?t let others talk down to you just because they run a successful business.


Whenever anyone wants to know what you do,call yourself a ?consultant.? By calling yourself a ?consultant,? you validate yourself as someone who really knows the game.


When you pitch another company, make sure you do not know what they do or if your service will work with their program, or what similar service said company uses.

Like I said earlier, you da man, don?t let people think that you do research. You are there because people like you, if they don?t get this, you don?t need their business.


Treat females in the industry as lower beings. After a big night of drinking on someone else?s tab, a good thing to do is to go grope one of them or ask them to show you their tits. You deserve it, you are the man, remember? They aren?t program owners or company execs or decision makers, plus some of them are actually models, so they are totally cool with that behavior. If they are standing next to a guy and you are talking, only make eye contact with the guy. Whenever he speaks, give a nod of interest to him and pretty much pretend she is not there, this will prevent her from chiming in all the time about shopping and ?which mall is the best.? The guy standing next to her will appreciate your shrewd candor. He may even slap fist with you and offer to take you to a big football game someday. Before you know it, you will be living in a Miller High Life commercial.


Then later that night, you can grab her tits at a party.

Plus, you da man.


When you are at an event with an open bar, if they don?t have your specific beer, let it be known. You have every right to get over served on what you enjoy drinking, not what the party host likes.

Remember, you have a lot of post on the message boards and people think you are cool. You could totally ruin their business by posting mean things. You have earned the power you have, so you deserve a cold one of your choice.


Don?t tip at industry events. The flyer you got said it was an open bar and that the drinks and food were free. The party host is responsible for putting money in the tip jar, not you.

It is important that you don?t let people run over you. If someone calls you out over it, take the higher road and walk away, then when you get home, don?t include him or her in your shoutout post.

That?ll show?em.



Never show all your cards. Whenever anyone asks about what you do, make sure you let him or her know that something huge is coming from you.

Make sure they know that you are going to change the way the Internet works. This will make them regret not allowing you the time to talk to them, drink on their tab, whatever. Make them realize it was their loss.

If you decide to use my tips, I can assure you that you will have a great show and that everyone will remember you.

[BoyAlley]

Originally Posted by WEG Cory

Whatever you do, do not attend a gay party. If you attend one, you will magically become attractive and gay guys will try to fag out on you. Only do business with straight people, they are the only ones with traffic. Plus, you don?t want all your message board pals thinking you are light in the loafers.

I better hide this sig you paid $5,000 for before someone sees it!

[BoyAlley]

BTW: Tell Ruth to stop hitting on me. She's making me uncomfortable.

[Wizzo]

You really should write a book Cory and profit from that sound advice like a playa does...

[Aneros Josh]

I am sensing a great deal of sarcasm coming from you young Cory....too bad it's very true

[JohnV]

Originally Posted by Wizzo

You really should write a book Cory and profit from that sound advice like a playa does...

He just did write a book ;-) I loved the sarcasm...very well placed.

[Mohawk Steve]

Holy shit Cory, you're killing me! Great read, as always.

You forgot the part where you SHOULD drink all you can at the open bars, follow that with 10 types of drugs, and then proceed to talk to every webmaster you can.

[Magnus]

When in doubt bring a Duncan!

[justsexxx]

So true. I never understood why ppl didn't think other ppl. When my taxicab was paid(by epoch sales rep) I thanked them and invited them for a drink...

Maybe many ppl in the industry are just not so social, like real geeks, and they don't know how to act in 'real' life?

Andre

[Cory W]

Originally Posted by Magnus

When in doubt bring a Duncan!

God I love that guy.

[WiredGuy]

I love your blog posts Cory, too funny.
WG

[B O B]

Midget Army?
BAH!

where do I sign up the Baby Gangster?

[Mugshot]

mouaehheaheahaeheah this is great!

[Phoenix]

i really th ought there would be some midgets in here

[Gabriel]

* BRAVO *

[Juilan]

Anal hobbit would be proud

[B O B]

Originally Posted by Phoenix

i really th ought there would be some midgets in here

click on my post
in IE

[C H R I S]

So classic - sound advice from Cory - Noobs take notice....

[fl_prn_str]

Originally Posted by justsexxx

So true. I never understood why ppl didn't think other ppl. When my taxicab was paid(by epoch sales rep) I thanked them and invited them for a drink...

Maybe many ppl in the industry are just not so social, like real geeks, and they don't know how to act in 'real' life?

Andre

its called basic social skills....some folks were born without the gene...

[myjah]

Hahaha, I knew this was going to be funny and of course you didn't let me down.

[Romeo GaySearch4Sex]

HAHAHAHA!

I love cory... hes too much fun

guess he forgot he went to the Naked Sword party at Xbiz ;)

[Sharky]

Cory is a GENIUS!

Seriously Cory.. I had a blast with you! It was our first time meeting, and I don't care what anyone says about you.. You are a great guy! Thanks for hooking me up with the room reservation last minute, and that reach-a-round you did was SPECTACULAR!

[Sharky]

Oh.. BTW Cory - If I dind't thank you before.. Thank uou for the drinks and good times man!

[JFK]

Thanks for that excellent advice Cory

[Halcyon]

Sorry to cut you off, but I actually have 13 tips that are even better.

Including one I learned while I was a consultant for SleazyJuicyCorp that will revolutionize the internet works.

(Another GREAT post, Cory)

[woj]

good stuff

[Webby]

Originally Posted by WEG Cory

Make sure they know that you are going to change the way the Internet works. This will make them regret not allowing you the time to talk to them, drink on their tab, whatever. Make them realize it was their loss.

If you decide to use my tips, I can assure you that you will have a great show and that everyone will remember you.

So you noticed the "aura" of the successful and important people at shows Cory?

Damned funny - excellent post and thanks for the guidance

[thebossxxx]

Baby Gangster of http://midgetcum.com/t1
As a Pint Sized 5 Star Genral...

[MichaelP]

ROFLAMO

Nice read as always Cory... Let me know when you publish a book

[Marie]

Originally Posted by WEG Cory

Treat females in the industry as lower beings. After a big night of drinking on someone else?s tab, a good thing to do is to go grope one of them or ask them to show you their tits. You deserve it, you are the man, remember? They aren?t program owners or company execs or decision makers, plus some of them are actually models, so they are totally cool with that behavior. If they are standing next to a guy and you are talking, only make eye contact with the guy. Whenever he speaks, give a nod of interest to him and pretty much pretend she is not there

My absolute favorite part of an excellent post.

I would add: If you accidentally DID listen to what the female said, make up for it by not shaking her hand/greeting HER at the end of the conversation.

[Harley Girl]

Cory... it was awesome seeing you... and thank you for coming to our dinner, was a pleasure to have you.

Also, thank you for introducing me to Dunkin he was certainly entertaining...LOL

Can't wait to see what you have to say about the past few days on your blog.

[Gabriel]

Originally Posted by thebossxxx

Baby Gangster of http://midgetcum.com/t1
As a Pint Sized 5 Star Genral...

Holy shit baby g is almost as tall as Poppy.

[lulu36]

"If you decide to use my tips, I can assure you that you will have a great show and that everyone will remember you."

i'd have to agree. your tips will help anyone make a lasting impression

[Rand]

{Right Click} {SAVE]

Damn Cory. That's some good advice. I wish you'd posted this a long time ago.

Always a pleasure to see you my sarcastic, clever, tall tatted friend.

[OMG Jim]

I'm glad we finally go to meet at our fifth show together. Sorry you had to deal with that leg brace but it definitely made you easy to spot.

As for the show advice... that shit's TOO deep for the Newbs!
Now they really won't know how to act at a show.

_

[Z]

Cory...I want to be like you when I grow up.

[Cory W]

I followed two of these tips.

[brand0n]

what is this "tip" thing you keep going over?

-totaly lost..

[stickyfingerz]

Originally Posted by FleshJosh

I am sensing a great deal of sarcasm coming from you young Cory....too bad it's very true

Josh you couldnt be less perceptive. Everything he said there was dead on. If everyone follows those tips they will do very well.

[RuthB]

damn Cory, your writing skillz just get better and better, hilarious stuff man!

[Roald]

Originally Posted by Marie

My absolute favorite part of an excellent post.

I would add: If you accidentally DID listen to what the female said, make up for it by not shaking her hand/greeting HER at the end of the conversation.

Damn I knew I forgot something after our hour of skinny dipping in sea ;)))

Great post btw

[JUSTB]

and just because I have big boobs don't tell me to enter the wet tshirt contest!

[Elli]

Luckily I didn't run into too many people who were following your tips at this show. Vegas tends to attract a slightly more obnoxious crowd for some reason.

[kristin]

Name drop. And donhahaha8217;t just name-drop anyone, name-drop a message board personality. This will add extra awesomeness to your already awesome show, it will validate you as someone that people like and respect.

This one is the best, there are quite a few of them out there ...

[James_Hotmovies]

Thanks for posting. I'll be sure to share with all my new hires

It is definitely a pleasure knowing you.

[Torn Rose]

Damn and here I have been doing things ass backwards... I even accidentally held a door open for a model.... Now I feel like shit.

To all those I offended by saying thank you and whatever crappy gratitude and good manners I showed please forgive me, I know not what I do.

BTW, great post!

[Benny]

Cory - You left out one very important tip...

Be sure to bring a professional partier with you, to liven things up and keep everyone laughing. Plus you learn lots of great tricks and gimmicks that only the professional partiers know about, like how to get a free cab ride and other cool stuff ;)



That kid was hilarious....

[Cory W]

Originally Posted by Benny

Cory - You left out one very important tip...

Be sure to bring a professional partier with you, to liven things up and keep everyone laughing. Plus you learn lots of great tricks and gimmicks that only the professional partiers know about, like how to get a free cab ride and other cool stuff ;)



That kid was hilarious....

haha

DH really is ahead of the marketing game. I wish I had thought of that idea.

[Buddy]

Damn, I broke a bunch of those rules.
I'll try harder next time.
It was great hanging out with you and I look forward to doing it again in Barcelona.

I will print that post out and make my new account reps commit it to memory.