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08-03-2006, 02:48 PM
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#1 | |
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Too lazy to set a custom title
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 51,692
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25 rules for a succesfull relationship
1. When she asks how she looks, shrug and say
"could be better" this will keep her on her toes, and girls love that. 2. Never hold her hand. This can be interpreted as a sign of weakness (or if she grabs your hand squeeze hers really, really hard until she cries. This will impress her by showing her what a strong man you are.) 3. Once a month sneak up on her from behind and knock her over. Girls are like dogs. They love to be roughed up. 4. Call her in the middle of the night to ask if she's sleeping. If she is say "you better be", repeat this 4 or 5 times until morning. This will show her you care. 5. When she is upset about something, suggest to her that it might be her fault. This will pave the way for her own personal improvement,and every girl needs some improvement. 6. Recognize the small things, they usually mean the most. Then when she's sleeping, steal all her small things and break them. Because jewellery is for *****'s and Asian ladies. 7. If you're talking to another girl, make sure she's looking. When she is, stare into her eyes mouth the words **** you and grab the other girls arse. Girls love competition. 8. Tell her you're taking her out to dinner. Drive for miles so she thinks it's going to be really special. Then take her to a burning tire yard. When she starts to get upset tell her you were just kidding and now you're really going to take her to dinner. Then drive her home. When she starts crying and asks why you would do something like that lean over and whisper very quietly into her ear "...because I can." 9. Introduce her to your friends as "some chick". Women love those special nicknames. 10. Play with her hair. Play with it HARD. 11. Warm her up when she's cold...and not by giving her your jacket.. then you might get cold. Rather, look her in the eye and say "if you don't stop b*tching about the cold right now you're going to be b*tching about a black eye." The best way to get warm is with fear. 12. Take her to a party. When you get there she'll have to go to the bathroom (they always do). Leave immediately. Come back right when the party's dying and yell at her the whole way home for ditching you at the party. 13. Make her laugh. A good way to do this is if she has a small pet. Kick the pet. I always find stuff like that funny. Why shouldn't girls? 14. Let her fall asleep in your arms. When she's fast asleep, wait 10 minutes then JUMP UP AND SCREAM IN HER EAR! Repeat until she goes home and you can use your arms for more important things. Like basketball. 15. Spit often. I hear girls like guys that spit. 16. If you care about her never ever tell her. This will only give her self confidence. Then you can never turn her into the object she deep down desires to be. 17. Every time you're in her house steal one of the following: shoes, earrings, or anything else that comes in pairs. Only take one of the pair. This way she'll go crazy. 18. Take her out to dinner. Right when she's about to order interrupt and say "No she's not hungry". Make her watch you eat. Girls love a guy that speaks for her. 19. Look her in the eyes and smile. Then clock her one. Girls love a spontaneous guy. 20. Give her one of your t-shirts... and make sure it has your smell on it. But not a sexy cologne smell. A bad smell. You know what I'm talking about. 22. If you're listening to music, and she asks to hear it, tell her no. This way she'll think you're mysterious. 23. Remember her birthday but don't get her something. Teach her material objects aren't important. The only thing that's important is that she keeps you happy. And your happiness is the greatest present she can ever get. 24. When she gives you a present on your birthday, Christmas, or just whenever, take it and tell her you love it. Then next time you know she's coming over on a trash day leave the trash can open and have the present visibly sticking out of the can. Girls actually don't like this one that much but I think it's funny. 25. If she's mad at you for not calling her when you say you will, promise her that you will call her at a certain time of the day. This will make sure that she waits by the phone. Tell her when you call you're going to tell her a special surprise. Now she'll be really excited. Now don't call. That's also quite funny
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08-03-2006, 03:21 PM
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#2 | |
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Too lazy to set a custom title
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 51,692
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This can't be falling on page 2. This is one of the funniest threads ever.
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08-03-2006, 03:30 PM
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#3 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: ICQ: 315-477-529
Posts: 3,846
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....interesting!!
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Pajio
Pajio [at] WorldWideContent.com ICQ: 315.477.529 Skype: WWC-Pajio  YOUR CHOICE FOR QUALITY CONTENT 15,000+ DVDs / 300+ Studios / 80+ Niches / High Res Photos / Any Format Encoding / 2257 |
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08-03-2006, 03:32 PM
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#4 |
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I am an Alien from space
Industry Role:
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 11,118
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It seems that it is.. Some of those are funny.
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ICQ: 16544251 - Skype: gator37 @ eastlink.ca - email: yngwie @ isys.ca |
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08-03-2006, 03:48 PM
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#5 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Toronto, Canada
Posts: 648
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lmfao. i'll never get that minute of my life back
 thanks |
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08-03-2006, 03:52 PM
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#6 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Sin City
Posts: 4,463
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Haha.
Nice. |
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08-03-2006, 07:48 PM
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#7 |
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Too lazy to set a custom title
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Global Traveler
Posts: 51,271
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 Copied and saved..  |
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08-03-2006, 10:24 PM
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#8 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 1,336
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LOL...interesting thread ehehe..
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CUSTOM TOONS, BLOG THEMES and DESIGNS | toonyshack AT gmail.com
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08-03-2006, 11:05 PM
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#9 |
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North Coast Pimp
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: 304-534-757
Posts: 9,395
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What kind of jack ass shit is that, anyone who listens to this shit will get no pussy, EVER!
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08-03-2006, 11:07 PM
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#10 |
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Registered User
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 62
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I have one rule:
Be compatible. |
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08-03-2006, 11:11 PM
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#11 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 5,025
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Quote:
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08-03-2006, 11:16 PM
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#12 |
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Viva la vulva!
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: you can't please everyone, so you got to please yourself
Posts: 16,557
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That's too much shit to remember. Just do what ya want.
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08-03-2006, 11:38 PM
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#13 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Panama
Posts: 523
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hey man looks like you have them figured out! congrats
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08-03-2006, 11:44 PM
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#14 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Tempe, Az
Posts: 202
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The really sad part about this is that my boyfriend has done a couple of these things...what a jack ass!!
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08-03-2006, 11:54 PM
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#15 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 4,895
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Quote:
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08-04-2006, 12:03 AM
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#16 |
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Registered User
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Encrypted. Access denied.
Posts: 31,779
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6. Recognize the small things, they usually mean the
most. Then when she's sleeping, steal all her small things and break them. Because jewellery is for *****'s and Asian ladies. 19. Look her in the eyes and smile. Then clock her one. Girls love a spontaneous guy. OMFG those are funny. |
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08-04-2006, 12:07 AM
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#17 |
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Confirmed IT Professional
Industry Role:
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Hollywood, CA
Posts: 3,744
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I love your post! it better not fall on further pages! My girl (looking over my shoulder) won't let this fall onto page two and further lol. But speaking without her looking over my shoulder...I can really use some of those pointers listed
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The Best Affiliate Software, Ever. |
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08-04-2006, 12:08 AM
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#18 |
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Confirmed IT Professional
Industry Role:
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Hollywood, CA
Posts: 3,744
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Officially, I'll bump this if it falls onto page 2 and further.
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The Best Affiliate Software, Ever. |
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08-04-2006, 12:12 AM
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#19 |
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boots are my religion
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Heart of europe
Posts: 21,765
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i hope it works
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08-04-2006, 12:25 AM
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#20 | |
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Too lazy to set a custom title
Industry Role:
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: The Boonies
Posts: 12,860
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Quote:
maybe it's your fault? |
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08-04-2006, 02:47 AM
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#21 | |
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Ronin
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Live by the code Die by the code
Posts: 17,693
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Quote:
you sir have no sense for humor
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 NichePay - $30 on all trials - Killer Ratios .................................................. Female Ejaculation - Hairy - Shemale Puffy Nipples - Huge Clits - And More! .................................................. |
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08-04-2006, 03:05 AM
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#22 |
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So Fucking Banned
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Victoria, Australia
Posts: 1,030
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lol , a good read , saved for future reference
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08-04-2006, 04:08 AM
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#23 |
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Confirmed User
Industry Role:
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Australia
Posts: 9,492
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haha so true...
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 Blue Design Studios - Adult Design Specialists! Email me for a free quote: [email protected] |
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08-04-2006, 07:51 AM
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#24 |
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jellyfish
 Join Date: Dec 2003
Posts: 71,528
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hahaha good one
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08-04-2006, 07:53 AM
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#25 |
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...
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Maryland ICQ:87038677
Posts: 11,542
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hahahahaha
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08-04-2006, 08:50 AM
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#26 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Tucson, AZ
Posts: 140
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OH! Know i now how he became so wonderful, he must have read these rules. Thank You! You've really improved our love life.
heh heh heh  |
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08-04-2006, 09:08 AM
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#27 | |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Manila, Philippines
Posts: 6,960
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Quote:
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08-04-2006, 10:59 AM
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#28 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Arizona
Posts: 1,499
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This is one of the funniest threads ever. I always love some good solid sarcasm. It's a lost art.
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08-04-2006, 11:39 AM
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#29 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 4,319
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You are soooo wrong!
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08-04-2006, 12:06 PM
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#30 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Makati
Posts: 4,643
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__________________
 Web Design & Programming - Creative Mainstream Style Web Design and Programming PORTFOLIO Custom Cartoons - High Quality Cartoon Studio PORTFOLIO Offshore Staff - Save Money & Grow Faster With Dedicated Offshore Staff PRICING ICQ:282-072-512
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08-04-2006, 01:15 PM
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#31 | ||
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North Coast Pimp
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: 304-534-757
Posts: 9,395
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Quote:
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08-04-2006, 01:27 PM
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#32 |
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one sick puppy
Industry Role:
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Where the worst of the West meets the worst of the East
Posts: 11,641
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good stuff
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i sale uncensored chatbots |
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08-04-2006, 01:45 PM
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#33 |
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Confirmed User
Industry Role:
Join Date: Sep 2002
Posts: 932
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Haha nice, i will use those!
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08-04-2006, 01:51 PM
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#34 |
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Confirmed User
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: ICQ: 263238646
Posts: 2,616
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he he he nice
)
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PSD to HTML/XHTML/CSS Services |
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08-04-2006, 02:03 PM
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#35 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 147
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nicely done.
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08-04-2006, 02:41 PM
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#36 |
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Hello world!
Industry Role:
Join Date: Mar 2003
Posts: 12,508
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08-04-2006, 02:43 PM
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#37 |
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Too lazy to set a custom title
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: pink adult dreams
Posts: 13,557
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Dre, are you joking about the first point?
If a man tells me "Could be better", i wouldn't like to meet him anymore. I would think he is not gentleman enough for me. Or am i oldfashioned? |
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08-04-2006, 02:52 PM
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#38 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: below the bails
Posts: 363
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thanksxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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08-04-2006, 03:25 PM
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#39 |
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GFY HALL OF FAME DAMMIT!!!
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 58,202
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lol.. those are great.
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08-04-2006, 03:34 PM
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#40 |
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Confirmed User
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 1,929
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funny shit dre.. ;)
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Processing Partners http://www.processingpartners.com |
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08-04-2006, 03:45 PM
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#41 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 283
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I laughed
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08-04-2006, 04:33 PM
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#42 |
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Confirmed User
Industry Role:
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 7,340
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Is it wrong that I actually od some of those things?
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08-04-2006, 04:36 PM
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#43 |
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Confirmed User
Join Date: May 2005
Location: behind you
Posts: 7,402
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...good luck to however tries this
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08-04-2006, 05:09 PM
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#44 |
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Too lazy to set a custom title
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: pink adult dreams
Posts: 13,557
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Hah! funn stuff. Now i read it to the end
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08-05-2006, 03:31 AM
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#45 | |
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Confirmed User
Industry Role:
Join Date: Jan 2002
Posts: 7,981
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Quote:
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08-05-2006, 03:39 AM
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#46 |
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Too lazy to set a custom title
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Writer for hire :) Gallery descriptions, articles, blog posts etc. ICQ: 209 356 106
Posts: 12,117
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bump for this thread. It really made me laugh
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