US Had Plans To Invade and Keep Canada - Washington Post

[hershie]

Saturday, December 31, 2005 Posted at 10:00 AM EST

From Saturday's Globe and Mail

NEW YORK ? We called their President a moron, and they called us the "retarded cousin." Their ambassador warned about the repercussions of aggressive rhetoric, and our Prime Minister aggressively asserted we will not be "dictated to."

In another age -- or in a Marx Brothers movie -- the escalation of insults and diplomatic contretemps could lead to only one thing: "Of course you know," Groucho famously intoned, "this means war."

Perhaps as a public service to their side, The Washington Post yesterday dusted off a 75-year-old U.S. plan to invade Canada, offering it as a contrast to the situation in Iraq, where, it suggested, there was no plan.

First approved in 1930, Joint Army and Navy Basic War Plan - Red was drawn up to defend the United States in the event of war with Britain.

It was one of a series of such contingency plans produced in the late 1920s. Canada, identified as Crimson, would be invaded to prevent the Britons from using it as a staging ground to attack the United States.

But having successfully captured Canada, the military planners had no intention of giving it up. "Blue [the Americans'] intentions are to hold in perpetuity all CRIMSON and RED territory gained," they wrote in an appendix.

The plan was withdrawn in 1939, declassified in 1974 and had gone largely unnoticed in a grey box at the National Archives until The Post, echoing the call-to-arms one hears from the drum-bangers at Fox News and elsewhere, resuscitated it under the headline, "Raiding the icebox."

The Post writer helpfully noted the presence of a potential fifth column in the Americans' midst, and chortled at the prospect of Celine Dion and Mike Myers being carted off to Guantanamo Bay in orange jumpsuits.

Canadian officials, predictably, refused to take seriously the report of a 75-year-old U.S. invasion plan.

"We found it amusing, and we'll just have to make sure that our plans are up to date as well," laughed Jasmine Panthaky, a spokeswoman for the Canadian embassy in Washington.

"From time to time, this thing does come up. I guess it's one of those curiosities in the relationship, given that we've been in the news a fair bit. . . . This is just a question of something that has resonance at a time when Canada is receiving its 15 minutes of fame."

Clearly, there are some U.S. radar screens you'd rather not be on.

Having once promised to repair a strained relationship, Prime Minister Paul Martin has apparently decided that an election campaign is a good time to chide the Bush administration for its failings. The U.S. ambassador to Canada, David Wilkins, responded in kind, urging the Prime Minister to cool the rhetoric or face repercussions -- a message to which Mr. Martin responded like a big-league slugger hitting a batting-practice lob over the fence.

The professional stirrers of strife on U.S. cable channels briefly focused on Canada and didn't like want they saw. MSNBC's Tucker Carlson said that all the intelligent Canadians had long since moved to New York and likened the country to a "retarded cousin." On Fox News, where embattled anger is the abiding emotion, talk show host Neil Cavuto said Canadians had "gotten too big for their britches" and may soon be an enemy of the United States.

Which brings us back to that 1930s-era invasion plan.

It starts with a seaborne assault on Halifax to cut Canada off from its British ally. A later version, approved in 1935, allowed for first-strike use of poison gas and strategic bombing of the city, if necessary.

It also posits that the U.S. invading forces take out Niagara Falls, seize Sudbury's strategic nickel mines, capture Winnipeg as the critical east-west rail juncture and attack Vancouver to deprive the British of a West Coast maritime base.

The 94-page document is rather long on geographic information -- important ports, main industries, transportation links -- and on published assessments of Canadian military strength. But it is rather skimpy on tactical details of a theoretical invasion.

Canada had its own plan, written nine years earlier, to counter a U.S. attack by invading the northern United States.

Likely, few Americans have spent time worrying about a Canadian invasion, other than in comedy clubs.

But the existence of War Plan - Red fed the imaginations of those Canadians who worried about the world's longest undefended border.

They believed that the Americans had always had a covetous view of their resource-rich country, and that the United States was always poised to invade if the opportunity arose.

The chief proponent of the invasion theorists is Floyd Rudmin, a U.S.-born, former Queen's University social psychology professor who has since decamped to the University of Tromso in Norway.

In the early 1990s, Prof. Rudmin wrote several articles -- much amplified in the Toronto Star -- on the U.S. expansion of Fort Drum in northern New York, arguing that the Americans were preparing to intervene if Canada experienced serious instability as a result of a Quebec secessionist movement.

Prof. Rudmin was critical of what he dubbed "the blind eye perspective" that Canadians maintained toward what he saw as obvious U.S. hostility toward its northern neighbour.

But as The Post noted, Canadians can probably relax for the foreseeable future, despite the bluster from the pundits. The U.S. military is otherwise occupied at the moment. Or are they just practising?

Battle plans

U.S. Joint Army and Navy

Basic War Plan -- Red

Key strategies

Capture Halifax to block British reinforcements

Seize key Winnipeg rail junction

Cut power by assault on Niagara Falls

March from Michigan to Sudbury nickel mines

Blockade both coasts

Use secret airbases to control airspace over Ontario

Victory

U.S. annexes captured territory

Canadian Defence

Scheme No. 1

Key strategies

Pre-emptive strikes from sea to sea

On word of U.S. invasion plan, Canadian forces would move to capture Spokane, Great Falls, Minneapolis, Buffalo, Albany and parts of Maine.

In face of U.S. counterattack, Canadian forces would retreat, blowing up bridges and railways, buying time until reinforcements from Britain could arrive.

Victory

Canada keeps Alaska

[Screaming]

Cliff notes?

[sonofsam]

Originally Posted by Screaming

Cliff notes?

US army tries to invade canada and they all freeze to death like the germans in russia

[hershie]

Originally Posted by sonofsam

US army tries to invade canada and they all freeze to death like the germans in russia

The Washington Post's headline about the US invasion plan was "Raiding the icebox."

[Matt 26z]

The only way the US will ever gain control of parts of Canada is if Canada is ever invaded by another country and the US comes to their rescue... but then keeps the land.

[Rochard]

You guys are a bunch of idiots. The United States has plans on paper to invade every country in the world. We keep detailed stats on every country, it's population, it's armies and fighting forces, it's key cities, etc, and has a plan to deal with nearly every possible event in the case something happens and we need to step in. The moment it's decided the US is going in the plans are quickly updated and adjusted as needed.

This includes Canada, Mexico, Russia, England, etc.

Christ guys, we are talking about the United States Government here. They don't take a crap in the morning without having a plan.

[fetishblog]

Who the fuck wants Canada? We're not THAT stupid. ;)

[Cory W]

So Canada isn't already a state?

[hershie]

Originally Posted by RocHard

You guys are a bunch of idiots. The United States has plans on paper to invade every country in the world. We keep detailed stats on every country, it's population, it's armies and fighting forces, it's key cities, etc, and has a plan to deal with nearly every possible event in the case something happens and we need to step in. The moment it's decided the US is going in the plans are quickly updated and adjusted as needed.

This includes Canada, Mexico, Russia, England, etc.

Christ guys, we are talking about the United States Government here. They don't take a crap in the morning without having a plan.

You are the idiot if you think that Canadians (or any other country for that mattter) shouldn't be disturbed of hearing their friend, neighbour and largest trading partner have a plan to invade and occupy and keep your cities/country. Of course this is just a contingency plan, but still, this doesn't help the optics of the US being the benevolent superpower when you hear they will throw out the window any respect for your sovereignty because they can.

[TheLegacy]

Originally Posted by hershie

You are the idiot if you think that Canadians (or any other country for that mattter) shouldn't be disturbed of hearing their friend, neighbour and largest trading partner have a plan to invade and occupy and keep your cities/country. Of course this is just a contingency plan, but still, this doesn't help the optics of the US being the benevolent superpower when you hear they will throw out the window any respect for your sovereignty because they can.

nothing personal Hershie - but I'm sure that Canada if it had the military power would be doing the exact same thing. Things may be fine now - but can military experts guarantee much less you that Canada or any other country will always be friends? No guarantee - and even though its been around 200 years since a war happened between our countries, there was still a war at one time and it may happen again.

It doesn't bother me that USA has a plan to invade us - they need to in case at some point in time we get leadership that is totally ridiculous that it becomes a threat.

I also know Rochard extremely well and one word you can never call the man is an idiot - he has been in the military and knows his shit better than you or most. He only speaks logically and without emotional attachment to the atmosphere that exists between our countries.

[Quotealex]

Originally Posted by Matt 26z

The only way the US will ever gain control of parts of Canada is if Canada is ever invaded by another country and the US comes to their rescue... but then keeps the land.

Please, as if Canada needs the US to protect itself. We can take care of our country by ourself, thank you.

[SmokeyTheBear]

the only war canada has gotten in with the usa , the usa was beaten badly ( chased back to the white house where it was burned down by british forces ).. i dont think many canadians are worried

[SmokeyTheBear]

canada has been planning a counter-attack for the last 5 years.. we have collected 23 billion pre-rolled hi-grade canadian weed joints, that we plan on air-dropping across the usa in the event of an attack.. then we plan on selling them all frito pies when they are finished ( just to rub salt int he wounds )

[hershie]

Originally Posted by TheLegacy

nothing personal Hershie - but I'm sure that Canada if it had the military power would be doing the exact same thing. Things may be fine now - but can military experts guarantee much less you that Canada or any other country will always be friends? No guarantee - and even though its been around 200 years since a war happened between our countries, there was still a war at one time and it may happen again.

It doesn't bother me that USA has a plan to invade us - they need to in case at some point in time we get leadership that is totally ridiculous that it becomes a threat.

I also know Rochard extremely well and one word you can never call the man is an idiot - he has been in the military and knows his shit better than you or most. He only speaks logically and without emotional attachment to the atmosphere that exists between our countries.

I was reciprocating being called an idiot by Rochard if you read his post. I don't like to initiate calling people silly names but will gladly stand up to anyone calling me an idiot.

And although I don't agree with your assessment of the situation, I would never insult you over it.

[hershie]

Here is original Washington Times editorial. It seems Canada also had an invasion plan of its own.


Raiding the Icebox
Behind Its Warm Front, the United States Made Cold Calculations to Subdue Canada

By Peter Carlson
Washington Post Staff Writer
Friday, December 30, 2005; C01

Invading Canada won't be like invading Iraq: When we invade Canada, nobody will be able to grumble that we didn't have a plan.

The United States government does have a plan to invade Canada. It's a 94-page document called "Joint Army and Navy Basic War Plan -- Red," with the word SECRET stamped on the cover. It's a bold plan, a bodacious plan, a step-by-step plan to invade, seize and annex our neighbor to the north. It goes like this:

First, we send a joint Army-Navy overseas force to capture the port city of Halifax, cutting the Canadians off from their British allies.

Then we seize Canadian power plants near Niagara Falls, so they freeze in the dark.

Then the U.S. Army invades on three fronts -- marching from Vermont to take Montreal and Quebec, charging out of North Dakota to grab the railroad center at Winnipeg, and storming out of the Midwest to capture the strategic nickel mines of Ontario.

Meanwhile, the U.S. Navy seizes the Great Lakes and blockades Canada's Atlantic and Pacific ports.

At that point, it's only a matter of time before we bring these Molson-swigging, maple-mongering Zamboni drivers to their knees! Or, as the official planners wrote, stating their objective in bold capital letters: "ULTIMATELY TO GAIN COMPLETE CONTROL."

It sounds like a joke but it's not. War Plan Red is real. It was drawn up and approved by the War Department in 1930, then updated in 1934 and 1935. It was declassified in 1974 and the word "SECRET" crossed out with a heavy pencil. Now it sits in a little gray box in the National Archives in College Park, available to anybody, even Canadian spies. They can photocopy it for 15 cents a page.

War Plan Red was actually designed for a war with England. In the late 1920s, American military strategists developed plans for a war with Japan (code name Orange), Germany (Black), Mexico (Green) and England (Red). The Americans imagined a conflict between the United States (Blue) and England over international trade: "The war aim of RED in a war with BLUE is conceived to be the definite elimination of BLUE as an important economic and commercial rival."

In the event of war, the American planners figured that England would use Canada (Crimson) -- then a quasi-pseudo-semi-independent British dominion -- as a launching pad for "a direct invasion of BLUE territory." That invasion might come overland, with British and Canadian troops attacking Buffalo, Detroit and Albany. Or it might come by sea, with amphibious landings on various American beaches -- including Rehoboth and Ocean City, both of which were identified by the planners as "excellent" sites for a Brit beachhead.

The planners anticipated a war "of long duration" because "the RED race" is "more or less phlegmatic" but "noted for its ability to fight to a finish." Also, the Brits could be reinforced by "colored" troops from their colonies: "Some of the colored races however come of good fighting stock, and, under white leadership, can be made into very efficient troops."

The stakes were high: If the British and Canadians won the war, the planners predicted, "CRIMSON will demand that Alaska be awarded to her."

Imagine that! Canada demanding a huge chunk of U.S. territory! Them's fightin' words! And so the American strategists planned to fight England by seizing Canada. (Also Jamaica, Barbados and Bermuda.) And they didn't plan to give them back.

"Blue intentions are to hold in perpetuity all CRIMSON and RED territory gained," Army planners wrote in an appendix to the war plan. "The policy will be to prepare the provinces and territories of CRIMSON and RED to become states and territories of the BLUE union upon the declaration of peace."
The Sudbury Offensive

None of this information is new. After the plan was declassified in 1974, several historians and journalists wrote about War Plan Red. But still it remains virtually unknown on both sides of the world's largest undefended border.

"I've never heard of it," said David Biette, director of the Canada Institute in Washington, which thinks about Canada.

"I remember sort of hearing about this," said Bernard Etzinger, spokesman for the Canadian Embassy in Washington. "It's the first I've heard of it," said David Courtemanche, mayor of Sudbury, Ontario, whose nickel mines were targeted in the war plan.

Pentagon spokesman Bryan Whitman said he'd never heard of the plan. He also said he wouldn't admit to knowing about such a plan if he did. "We don't talk about any of our contingency plans," he said.

Has the Pentagon updated War Plan Red since the '30s?

"The Defense Department never talks about its contingency plans for any countries," Whitman said. "We don't acknowledge which countries we have contingency plans for."

Out in Winnipeg -- the Manitoba capital, whose rail yards were slated to be seized in the plan -- Brad Salyn, the city's director of communications, said he didn't think Winnipeg Mayor Sam Katz knew anything about War Plan Red: "You know he would have no clue about what you're talking about, eh?"

"I'm sure Winnipeggers will stand up tall in defense of our country," Mayor Katz said later. "We have many, many weapons." What kind of weapons? "We have peashooters, slingshots and snowballs," he said, laughing.

But the Canadians' best weapon, Katz added, is their weather. "It gets to about minus-50 Celsius with a wind chill," he said. "It will be like Napoleon's invasion of Russia. I'm quite convinced that you'll meet your Waterloo on the banks of the Assiniboine River."
Gas Station Strategy
As it turns out, Katz isn't the first Canadian to speculate on how to fight the U.S.A. In fact, Canadian military strategists developed a plan to invade the United States in 1921 -- nine years before their American counterparts created War Plan Red.

The Canadian plan was developed by the country's director of military operations and intelligence, a World War I hero named James Sutherland "Buster" Brown. Apparently Buster believed that the best defense was a good offense: His "Defence Scheme No. 1" called for Canadian soldiers to invade the United States, charging toward Albany, Minneapolis, Seattle and Great Falls, Mont., at the first signs of a possible U.S. invasion.

"His plan was to start sending people south quickly because surprise would be more important than preparation," said Floyd Rudmin, a Canadian psychology professor and author of "Bordering on Aggression: Evidence of U.S. Military Preparations Against Canada," a 1993 book about both nations' war plans. "At a certain point, he figured they'd be stopped and then retreat, blowing up bridges and tearing up railroad tracks to slow the Americans down."

Brown's idea was to buy time for the British to come to Canada's rescue. Buster even entered the United States in civilian clothing to do some reconnaissance. "He had a total annual budget of $1,200," said Rudmin, "so he himself would drive to the areas where they were going to invade and take pictures and pick up free maps at gas stations."

Rudmin got interested in these war plans in the 1980s when he was living in Kingston, Ontario, just across the St. Lawrence River from Fort Drum, the huge Army base in Upstate New York. Why would the Americans put an Army base in such a wretched, frigid wilderness? he wondered. Could it be there to . . . fight Canada?

He did some digging. He found "War Plan Red" and "Defence Scheme No. 1." At the Army War College in Carlisle, Pa., he found a 1935 update of War Plan Red, which specified which roads to use in the invasion ("The best practicable route to Vancouver is via Route 99").

Rudmin also learned about an American plan from 1935 to build three military airfields near the Canadian border and disguise them as civilian airports. The secret scheme was revealed after the testimony of two generals in a closed-door session of the House Military Affairs Committee was published by mistake. When the Canadian government protested the plan, President Franklin Roosevelt reassured it that he wasn't contemplating war. The whole brouhaha made the front page of the New York Times on May 1, 1935.

That summer, however, the Army held what were the biggest war games in American history on the site of what is now Fort Drum, Rudmin said. Is he worried that the Yanks will invade his country from Fort Drum?

"Not now ," he said. "Now the U.S. is kind of busy in Iraq. But I wouldn't put it past them." He's not paranoid, he hastened to add, and he doesn't think the States will simply invade Canada the way Hitler invaded Russia.

But if some kind of crisis -- perhaps something involving the perennially grumpy French Canadians -- destabilized Canada, then . . . well, Fort Drum is just across the river. "We most certainly are not preparing to invade Canada," said Ben Abel, the official spokesman for Fort Drum. The fort, he added, is home to the legendary 10th Mountain Division, which is training for its third deployment in Afghanistan. There are also 1,200 Canadian troops in Afghanistan.

"I find it very hard to believe that we'd be planning to invade Canada," Abel said. "We have a lot of Canadian soldiers training here. I bumped into a Canadian officer in the bathroom the other day."

CONT'D

[hershie]

Invading Canada is an old American tradition. Invading Canada successfully is not. During the American Revolution, Benedict Arnold -- then in his pre-traitor days -- led an invasion of Canada from Maine. It failed.

During the War of 1812, American troops invaded Canada several times. They were driven back.

In 1839, Americans from Maine confronted Canadians in a border dispute known as the Aroostook War.

"There were never any shots fired," said Etzinger, the Canadian Embassy spokesman, "but I think an American cow was injured -- and a Canadian pig."

In 1866, about 800 Irish Americans in the Fenian Brotherhood decided to strike a blow for Irish independence by invading Canada. They crossed the Niagara River into Ontario, where they defeated a Canadian militia. But when British troops approached, the Fenians fled back to the United States, where many were arrested.

After that, Americans stopped invading Canada and took up other hobbies, such as invading Mexico, Haiti, Nicaragua, Grenada and, of course, Iraq.

But the dream of invading Canada lives on in the American psyche, occasionally manifesting itself in bizarre ways. Movies, for instance.

In the 1995 movie "Canadian Bacon," the U.S. president, played by Alan Alda, decides to jump-start the economy by picking a fight with Canada. His battle cry: "Surrender pronto or we'll level Toronto."


In the 1999 movie "South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut," Americans, angered that their kids have been corrupted by a pair of foulmouthed, flatulent Canadian comedians, go to war. Canada responds by sending its air force to bomb the Hollywood home of the Baldwin brothers -- a far more popular defensive strategy than anything Buster Brown devised. Moviegoers left theaters humming the film's theme:

Blame Canada! Blame Canada!
With all their hockey hullabaloo
And that bitch Anne Murray too!
Blame Canada! Shame on Canada!

But it's not just movies. The urge to invade Canada comes in myriad forms.

In 2002, the conservative magazine National Review published an essay called "Bomb Canada: The Case for War." The author, Jonah Goldberg, suggested that the United States "launch a quick raid into Canada" and blow something up -- "perhaps an empty hockey stadium." That would cause Canada to stop wasting its money on universal health insurance and instead fund a military worthy of the name, so that "Canada's neurotic anti-Americanism would be transformed into manly resolve."

And let's not forget the Web site http://invadecanada.us/ , which lists many compelling reasons for doing do: "let's make Alaska actually connected to the U.S. again!" and "they're just a little too proud" and "the surrender will come quickly, they're French after all."

The site also sells T-shirts, buttons, teddy bears and thong underwear, all of them decorated with the classic picture of Uncle Sam atop the slogan "I WANT YOU to Invade Canada."

What's going on here? Why do Americans love to joke about invading Canada?

Because Americans see Canadians as goody-goodies, said Biette, the Canada Institute director. Canadians didn't rebel against the British, remaining loyal colonial subjects. They didn't have a Wild West, settling their land without the kind of theatrical gunfights that make for good movies. And they like to hector us about our misbehavior.

"We're 'life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness' and they're 'peace, order and good government,' " Biette said. "So if you're a wild American, you look at them and say, 'They're just a bunch of Boy Scouts.' "
The C-Bomb

Canadians are well aware of our invasion talk. Not surprisingly, they take it a bit more seriously than we do.

When "The West Wing" had a subplot last winter about a U.S.-Canada border incident, Canadian newspapers took note.

When Jon Stewart joked about invading Canada on "The Daily Show" last March, Canadian newspapers covered the story.

When the Toronto Star interviewed comedian Jimmy Kimmel last year, the reporter asked him: "Is it only a matter of time before America invades Canada?"

"I'm not sure," Kimmel replied.

In 2003, the Canadian army set up an Internet chat room where soldiers and civilians could discuss defense issues. "One of the hottest topics on the site discusses whether the U.S. will invade Canada to seize its natural resources," the Ottawa Citizen reported. "If the attack did come, Canada could rely on a scorched-earth policy similar to what Russia did when invaded by Nazi Germany, one participant recommends. 'With such emmense [sic] land, and with our cold climates, we may be able to hold them off, even though we have the much weaker military,' the individual concludes."

Etzinger, the Canadian Embassy spokesman, isn't worried about an American invasion because Canada has a secret weapon -- actually thousands of secret weapons.

"We've got thousands of Canadians in the U.S. right now, in place secretly," he said. "They could be on your street. We've sent people like Celine Dion and Mike Myers to secretly infiltrate American society."

Pretty funny, Mr. Etzinger. But the strategists who wrote War Plan Red were prepared for that problem. They noted that "it would be necessary to deal internally" with the "large number" of Brits and Canadians living in the United States -- and also with "a small number of professional pacifists and communists."

The planners did not specify exactly what would be done with those undesirables. But it would be kinda fun to see Celine Dion and Mike Myers wearing orange jumpsuits down in Guantanamo.

Eh?

? 2005 The Washington Post Company

[bringer]

Originally Posted by hershie

You are the idiot if you think that Canadians (or any other country for that mattter) shouldn't be disturbed of hearing their friend, neighbour and largest trading partner have a plan to invade and occupy and keep your cities/country. Of course this is just a contingency plan, but still, this doesn't help the optics of the US being the benevolent superpower when you hear they will throw out the window any respect for your sovereignty because they can.

are you really concerned about a plan devised in 1920 and approved in 1930? the truth is, the only way canada might stand a chance is if they followed the plan to a T and used the calvary

btw, what about this? they had a plan nine years earlier and you're upset at the US?

Canada had its own plan, written nine years earlier, to counter a U.S. attack by invading the northern United States.

[3M TA3]

CIA fact book is one of the best reads.

I thought it was russian sub captians that didn't take a crap without a plan.

Well put Roc

Originally Posted by RocHard

You guys are a bunch of idiots. The United States has plans on paper to invade every country in the world. We keep detailed stats on every country, it's population, it's armies and fighting forces, it's key cities, etc, and has a plan to deal with nearly every possible event in the case something happens and we need to step in. The moment it's decided the US is going in the plans are quickly updated and adjusted as needed.

This includes Canada, Mexico, Russia, England, etc.

Christ guys, we are talking about the United States Government here. They don't take a crap in the morning without having a plan.

[hershie]

Originally Posted by bringer

are you really concerned about a plan devised in 1920 and approved in 1930? the truth is, the only way canada might stand a chance is if they followed the plan to a T and used the calvary

btw, what about this? they had a plan nine years earlier and you're upset at the US?

The only part I have a real problem with is where it calls for the US to keep all of Canada forever. That is scary.

[Cman]

It will probably happen some day. Our best bet is to fly under the radar for as long as possible and not tell anyone about our vast amount of natural resources haha

Hopefully it won't happen in my lifetime, but if it does, I refuse to become an American citizen. I was born Canadian and I will die Canadian, regardless of what the map says.

[SmokeyTheBear]

i would have been more suprised if they said " usa has never had a plan to invade canada"

[Manowar]

Originally Posted by SmokeyTheBear

canada has been planning a counter-attack for the last 5 years.. we have collected 23 billion pre-rolled hi-grade canadian weed joints, that we plan on air-dropping across the usa in the event of an attack.. then we plan on selling them all frito pies when they are finished ( just to rub salt int he wounds )

[Thomas1007]

If the US ever invaded Canada, our plan is to feed their troops Canadian Beer,
get them shitfaced and send them home with hangovers. It's a simple plan but highly effective.

[$5 submissions]

This isn't the first time.

The War of 1812 was a war between the US and Canada/Britain.

The War of 1812 was partly due to Southern American agitation to invade Canada. The Americans declared war and invaded Canada. The Brits weren't having any of that and coupled with stubborn Canadian resistance, not only kicked the US out but INVADED the US and burned the White House down. Indeed, the White House was painted white due to the effects of the burning.

Don't take my word for it. Some background on the War of 1812: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/War_of_1812

[directfiesta]

You mean we could be invaded... oups, I mean LIBERATED....

[broke]

It really is funny to watch people get up in arms about and attempt to defend a 75 year old plan that was withdrawn in 1939.

[SleazyDream]

75 years ago we'd have kicked the US's ass.

the commonwealth had a larger and more powerful army

[Nysus]

Originally Posted by SmokeyTheBear

canada has been planning a counter-attack for the last 5 years.. we have collected 23 billion pre-rolled hi-grade canadian weed joints, that we plan on air-dropping across the usa in the event of an attack.. then we plan on selling them all frito pies when they are finished ( just to rub salt int he wounds )

LOL.

Matt

[broke]

Originally Posted by SleazyDream

75 years ago we'd have kicked the US's ass.

the commonwealth had a larger and more powerful army

Sounds similar to a miscalculation made by the Germans, Japanese, and N. Koreans...

[GTS Mark]

DH

[kenny]

Originally Posted by $5 submissions

This isn't the first time.

The War of 1812 was a war between the US and Canada/Britain.

The War of 1812 was partly due to Southern American agitation to invade Canada. The Americans declared war and invaded Canada. The Brits weren't having any of that and coupled with stubborn Canadian resistance, not only kicked the US out but INVADED the US and burned the White House down. Indeed, the White House was painted white due to the effects of the burning.

Don't take my word for it. Some background on the War of 1812: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/War_of_1812

1812 was a LONG time ago.

I'm sorry but Canada would get their asses handed to them today.

[kenny]

I think what the United States spends on military probably exceeds Canada's GDP

[hershie]

This story made the TV news in Vancouver earlier today.

[directfiesta]

Originally Posted by kenny

I think what the United States spends on military probably exceeds Canada's GDP

Canada ? GDP: $ 1,023,000,000,000
US Military expenses: 260,000,000,000

Again wrong.

[minusonebit]

This is a good thread. It needs a bump.

[baddog]

Originally Posted by Alex from Montreal

Please, as if Canada needs the US to protect itself. We can take care of our country by ourself, thank you.

[AmateurFlix]

Originally Posted by broke

It really is funny to watch people get up in arms about and attempt to defend a 75 year old plan that was withdrawn in 1939.

[SilentKnight]

Originally Posted by kenny

1812 was a LONG time ago.

I'm sorry but Canada would get their asses handed to them today.

Those who don't learn from history...are destined to repeat it.

If need be, we'll send in a few Quebecers waving white flags (attached to their hockey sticks, of course), and back them up with our Newfies armed with their vintage-but-still-functioning WWII FNC1 rifles and harpoon guns.

Muahahahahaha.

[huey]

Americans are too fat to fight.

[Madcatz]

screw canada - no one cares!

[Spunky]

Originally Posted by Alex from Montreal

Please, as if Canada needs the US to protect itself. We can take care of our country by ourself, thank you.

You still feel that way?...um..no we can't..numbers man

[Spunky]

Originally Posted by Madcatz

screw canada - no one cares!

I bet you're a racist

[BlingDaddy]

I like Canada.... if we're taking them over what will that do to real estate values?

[northboy]

honestly, the rest of Canada could fall, but no way the US gets Quebec, we have so much poutine we could *fry* you guys to hell and back.

[The Sultan Of Smut]

LOL I think what saved us was the thought of assimilating 30mil raving liberals screaming for universal health care.

[The Sultan Of Smut]

Hey Hershie it's your Beach Ave. neighbour here, haven't seen you post in a while.

[Shocking]

if u life in panama like i do you would find this thread so fucking funny.

[The Sultan Of Smut]

Originally Posted by Shocking

if u life in panama like i do you would find this thread so fucking funny.

Hey sweet dude I'll be down there next New Years for a big house party. If you'ld like to come hit me up on ICQ and I'll try and remember to give you the details. Or if the party sucks maybe I'll hit you up

245-875-356

[Doctor Dre]

I'm not surprised that the biggest empire on earth has plan to invade the closest country that's ressource rich...

[The Sultan Of Smut]

Originally Posted by Doctor Dre

I'm not surprised that the biggest empire on earth has plan to invade the closest country that's ressource rich...

I'm sure every country has drawn up plans for every contingency. I'm quite certain we've had spys down there for a hundred years.