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Old 03-28-2002, 06:21 PM   #1
jimmyf
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Join Date: Feb 2001
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Bricklayer

In a message dated 3/27/2002 2:43:36 PM Pacific Standard
Time, BDrewett writes:


Bricklayer
Possibly the funniest story in a long while. This is a
bricklayer's accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of
the Australian equivalent of the Workers' Compensation board.

This is a true story. Had this guy died, he'd have received a

Darwin Award for sure....

Dear Sir:

I am writing in response to your request for additional
information in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor
planning" as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller
explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient.

I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I
was working alone on the roof of a new six story building. When I
completed my work, I found that I had some bricks left over which,
when weighed later were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs.

Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower
them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side
of the building on the sixth floor.

Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof,
swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went
down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow
descent of the bricks. You will note in Block 11 of the accident
report form that I weigh 135lbs.

Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so
suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope.
Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the
building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was
now proceeding downward at an equal, impressive speed. This
explained the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collar
bone, as listed in section 3 of the accident report form.

Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not
stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into
the pulley. Fortunately by this time I had regained my
presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of
beginning to experience a great deal of pain.

At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of
bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid
of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately
50 lbs. I refer you again to my weight. As you can imagine, I began a
rapid descent, down the side of the building. In the vicinity
of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the
two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several lacerations of my leg
and lower body.

Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with
the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I
fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately only three
vertebrae were cracked.

I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile
of bricks, in pain, unable to move, I again lost my composure and
presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the
empty barrel begin its journey back down onto me.

This explains the two broken legs.

I hope this answers your inquiry

PD
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Old 03-28-2002, 08:16 PM   #2
Bigdogg
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funny
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Old 03-28-2002, 08:20 PM   #3
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that would suck : )
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Old 03-28-2002, 09:23 PM   #4
zubr
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haha.. what a moron, he should work for a CJ
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Old 03-28-2002, 09:58 PM   #5
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that was absolutely fucking hilarious!
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