This Just In!!!!!!!! - GoFuckYourself.com

Tam · 03-14-2002, 03:34 PM

As some of you know, railz has been writing for me for awhile now and has become a very valued employee of Varadox. Well........

He is an awesome writer but I can't seem to keep him in lline, he is a wild man and in DESPERATE need of attention that I, as a happily married woman, cannot give him at this time. He is in desperate need of some FEMALE companionship and we are taking applications right now to find him that "right" someone.

MUST be able to answer ALL questions below:

"Are you woman enough for Dino?"
"Could you win Dino's Heart?"
"Will you be there for him in bad times?"
"Will you promise to always treat him like he is the only man in the world for you?"
"Will you do sexual favors for him at HIS request, no matter how strange the request?"
"Do you love long walks on the beach?"
"Do you like being spoiled beyond your wildest dreams and treated like a Queen?"
"Will you promise not to EVER break his heart?" (say no to this one and you have ME to deal with!!!!!!)
"Will you swear to be his one and only til death do you part?"
"Will you make a good mother to his kids?"
"Will you be willing to relocate?"

We are starting a MASSIVE search for his "Miss Right" and if you have all the proper experience then please email me at:
[email protected]

forgot to add this:
ANY and ALL applicants will be taken by the women he works with and will be at OUR sole discretion!!
Tam

Kimmykim · 03-14-2002, 03:38 PM

The dialer biz is good enough to pay for all that crack you're smoking I see... ;)

Tam · 03-14-2002, 03:40 PM

So I am thinking YOU are NOT the woman for railz then right?

*ducking*

3Jane · 03-14-2002, 03:41 PM

please note that only over-qualified applicants will be contacted for interview

and so begins the quest for the perfect woman....

he he he

^R3K^ · 03-14-2002, 03:41 PM

can I apply?

Jakke PNG · 03-14-2002, 03:41 PM

I'm the right woman. Come to papa.

Kimmykim · 03-14-2002, 03:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Tam
So I am thinking YOU are NOT the woman for railz then right?

*ducking*

Haha, I'm probably not the right woman for anything you know...

XXXPaysiteDesign · 03-14-2002, 03:43 PM

Are you accepting applications from fat hairy women? If the answer is yes contact me on ICQ. Thanks!

Tam · 03-14-2002, 03:43 PM

Sure you can apply, if you have tits and a nice tight ass and don't shave your face, go for it, 3Jane is taking all applications.......

kimmy, you know better than that, you are one of the best women I know..... BUT you may be WAY too over qualified for this one, I would have to deliver him to you in a plate of armor, you are HARSH!!!

Tam

TaDoW · 03-14-2002, 03:45 PM

hey tam ... can it be a guy if he acts like a girl and dresses like one?

3Jane · 03-14-2002, 03:46 PM

a hairy face could definitely give you a dangerous competitive edge. what else can you offer our dear romeo? bring it on.

Jamdin · 03-14-2002, 03:48 PM

Miss Right don't exist anymore since she's been married for twenty years to Mr Wrong...

Jakke PNG · 03-14-2002, 04:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by XXXPaysiteDesign
Are you accepting applications from fat hairy women? If the answer is yes contact me on ICQ. Thanks!

I was first!

This picture will haunt you all until the end of days.

DTK · 03-14-2002, 04:08 PM

Hey Railz, that's one cool boss you have! I mean how many employers offer "getting laid assistance"

ElvisManson · 03-14-2002, 04:09 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Tam

MUST be able to answer ALL questions below:

"Are you woman enough for Dino?"
"Could you win Dino's Heart?"
"Will you be there for him in bad times?"
"Will you promise to always treat him like he is the only man in the world for you?"
"Will you do sexual favors for him at HIS request, no matter how strange the request?"
"Do you love long walks on the beach?"
"Do you like being spoiled beyond your wildest dreams and treated like a Queen?"
"Will you promise not to EVER break his heart?" (say no to this one and you have ME to deal with!!!!!!)
"Will you swear to be his one and only til death do you part?"
"Will you make a good mother to his kids?"
"Will you be willing to relocate?"

Tam

What if all of the answers are no?

Would she still qualify?

theWatsonian · 03-14-2002, 04:12 PM

Got to cut down those requirements. How about this:

Are you female (or can you be made to look female)?

Are you breathing (not required if you are submitting this application for yourself)?

SNOW · 03-14-2002, 04:36 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Kimmykim
The dialer biz is good enough to pay for all that crack you're smoking I see... ;)

HILARIOUS....I'm sre Aaron can find him someone..

Tam · 03-14-2002, 05:30 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ElvisManson

What if all of the answers are no?

Would she still qualify?

Well I guess we could work something out........

Is she BREATHING?

SexyDollEyes · 03-14-2002, 09:37 PM

I am Woman hear me ROARRRRRRRRRRR...LOL

Does having Big Hooters Qualify me? LOL

Tam · 03-14-2002, 09:55 PM

SexyDollEyes, I guess I should have stated that no one within the company can apply. We have a strict policy on love affairs within the company......... don't worry baby, you will learn the damn rules, or you'll get beatings like the rest of these clowns do one........

rotfl

SexyDollEyes · 03-14-2002, 10:24 PM

Haha, Do the beatings include Whips and chains too? If so Beat me babyyyyyyyyyyy...lol

AaronM · 03-14-2002, 11:24 PM

I thought Railz was gay?

Tam · 03-14-2002, 11:27 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by SexyDollEyes
Haha, Do the beatings include Whips and chains too? If so Beat me babyyyyyyyyyyy...lol

Oh hell yes... why ya think railz has been all over me? He LOVES beatings...........

Aaron, is this why the two of you are moving in together? Something I should know about here babe?

rotfl

AaronM · 03-14-2002, 11:29 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Tam

Oh hell yes... why ya think railz has been all over me? He LOVES beatings...........

Aaron, is this why the two of you are moving in together? Something I should know about here babe?

rotfl

That is EXACTLY why... It is a proven fact that fags attract more chicks. Since I lack that gene, I need to fill the void with Railz. He does not even need a full size room, just a walk in closet.....Until he decides to come out.

Paul Markham · 03-14-2002, 11:35 PM

Sorry Tam. but the woman that fits that description is gone.
But I do know her name, it's Eva Markham

SexyDollEyes · 03-14-2002, 11:37 PM

hahaa....shits getting deep...break out the vaseline!!

Kimmykim · 03-14-2002, 11:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by charly
Sorry Tam. but the woman that fits that description is gone.
But I do know her name, it's Eva Markham

Looks like *somebody* is trying to get laid tonite ;)

Tam · 03-14-2002, 11:41 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by SexyDollEyes
hahaa....shits getting deep...break out the vaseline!!

OH DON'T say THAT....... railz will be all over you. He likes whips and chains and then you top itoff with Vaseline...... GOD, you are about to have a problem on your hands. He won't care about company policy once he sees this one. LMAO

kimmy........ most likely, isn't that usually when men praise their women? rotfl

Paul Markham · 03-14-2002, 11:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Kimmykim

Looks like *somebody* is trying to get laid tonite ;)

It's morning here and I AM getting some this morning, and did get some last night. And look at Eva's profile, got a model staying tonight.

Now you know why no one upsets me.

Oh nearly forgot look at Eva's post of the how to keep babes quiet.

I am a lucky man.

SongRider · 03-15-2002, 12:38 AM

How about Rosie O'........... Wait, shes gay..... nevermind*L*

Kimmykim · 03-15-2002, 02:03 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Tam

kimmy........ most likely, isn't that usually when men praise their women? rotfl

Hahaha, Tam, I think that's when men will say or do ANYTHING for their women ;)

Tam · 03-15-2002, 07:12 AM

kimmy..... exactly..... don't give it to them for awhile and they either go to someone else or they see you as the most beautiful woman on earth......... after awhile you start looking like some playboy centerfold or some shit. And the spoiling commences............ woohoo............. rotfl

SongRider, she DOES have a pulse though, maybe we can convert her? LOL

The applications are pouring in, just none qualified enough as of yet............... I will know when the right one comes along.

Ludedude · 03-15-2002, 10:39 AM

I've got Amp's old leaking water jug....shit...never mind, wrong thread.

Tam · 03-15-2002, 01:47 PM

ludedude, so far you are the most qualified one........ at least you will feed him...... ok give him water. LMAO

=^..^= · 03-15-2002, 04:44 PM

Good luck in Finding Railz a nice Girl

He certainly deserves one - and anyone who breaks his heart will also have ME to deal with

I have never met a sweeter more geniune man - who is shivalrous and also very funny
(except my fiancee lol)

This is the man who won a cash prize on another message board and even though he needed the money - donated the prize to the childrens cancer foundation. He is a true knight in shining armour.

Kitty
xxx

<a href="http://www.dirtydollar.com"><img src="http://www.sexcontents.com/kitty/ddsmall.gif"></a>
<a href="http://www.sexcontents.com"><img src="http://www.sexcontents.com/kitty/sexcontents.gif"></a>

Snake Doctor · 03-15-2002, 04:57 PM

If you do find Railz a woman who meets all of those requirements, can you set me up with her sister?

And am I the only one who finds it odd that Railz hasn't posted on this thread?

03-14-2002, 03:34 PM	#1
Tam Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: In your face Posts: 8,488	This Just In!!!!!!!! As some of you know, railz has been writing for me for awhile now and has become a very valued employee of Varadox. Well........ He is an awesome writer but I can't seem to keep him in lline, he is a wild man and in DESPERATE need of attention that I, as a happily married woman, cannot give him at this time. He is in desperate need of some FEMALE companionship and we are taking applications right now to find him that "right" someone. MUST be able to answer ALL questions below: "Are you woman enough for Dino?" "Could you win Dino's Heart?" "Will you be there for him in bad times?" "Will you promise to always treat him like he is the only man in the world for you?" "Will you do sexual favors for him at HIS request, no matter how strange the request?" "Do you love long walks on the beach?" "Do you like being spoiled beyond your wildest dreams and treated like a Queen?" "Will you promise not to EVER break his heart?" (say no to this one and you have ME to deal with!!!!!!) "Will you swear to be his one and only til death do you part?" "Will you make a good mother to his kids?" "Will you be willing to relocate?" We are starting a MASSIVE search for his "Miss Right" and if you have all the proper experience then please email me at: [email protected] forgot to add this: ANY and ALL applicants will be taken by the women he works with and will be at OUR sole discretion!! Tam Last edited by Tam; 03-14-2002 at 03:36 PM..

03-14-2002, 03:41 PM	#4
3Jane Registered User Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Coldasfuckcanada Posts: 49	please note that only over-qualified applicants will be contacted for interview and so begins the quest for the perfect woman.... he he he __________________ 3Jane

03-14-2002, 03:41 PM	#5
^R3K^ Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: North Carolina Posts: 2,815	can I apply? __________________ no business like ho business Http://www.natnet.com No Hype, Just Results

03-14-2002, 03:41 PM	#6
Jakke PNG ex-TeenGodFather Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Suomi Finland Perkele Posts: 20,306	I'm the right woman. Come to papa. __________________ ..and I'm off.

03-14-2002, 03:43 PM	#8
XXXPaysiteDesign Confirmed User Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Everett, WA Posts: 2,201	Are you accepting applications from fat hairy women? If the answer is yes contact me on ICQ. Thanks! __________________ SIG TOO BIG! Maximum 120x60 button and no more than 3 text lines of DEFAULT SIZE and COLOR. Unless your sig is for a GFY top banner sponsor, then you may use a 624x80 instead of a 120x60.

03-14-2002, 03:38 PM	#2
Kimmykim bitchslapping zebras!!!!! Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: In a shack by the beach Posts: 16,015	The dialer biz is good enough to pay for all that crack you're smoking I see... ;)

03-14-2002, 03:40 PM	#3
Tam Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: In your face Posts: 8,488	So I am thinking YOU are NOT the woman for railz then right? ducking

03-14-2002, 03:45 PM	#10
TaDoW Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Where It Rains Posts: 3,875	hey tam ... can it be a guy if he acts like a girl and dresses like one? __________________ -TaDoW I've Upped My Standards, Up Yours!

03-14-2002, 03:46 PM	#11
3Jane Registered User Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Coldasfuckcanada Posts: 49	a hairy face could definitely give you a dangerous competitive edge. what else can you offer our dear romeo? bring it on. __________________ 3Jane

03-14-2002, 03:48 PM	#12
Jamdin Registered User Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Kansas Posts: 3,560	Miss Right don't exist anymore since she's been married for twenty years to Mr Wrong...

03-14-2002, 04:08 PM	#14
DTK Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: The 510 Posts: 4,545	Hey Railz, that's one cool boss you have! I mean how many employers offer "getting laid assistance"

03-14-2002, 04:12 PM	#16
theWatsonian Confirmed User Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: PB4L HQ Posts: 1,737	Got to cut down those requirements. How about this: Are you female (or can you be made to look female)? Are you breathing (not required if you are submitting this application for yourself)? __________________ <a href="http://www.watsonian.net"><img src="http://www.watsonian.net/archives/cjpb6.gif" border="0"></a><a href="http://www.adultplatinum.com/wm.html?id=567353"><img src="http://www.watsonian.net/archives/adult_platinum_85x85_03.gif" border="0"></a>

03-14-2002, 09:37 PM	#19
SexyDollEyes Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Ohio Posts: 153	I am Woman hear me ROARRRRRRRRRRR...LOL Does having Big Hooters Qualify me? LOL __________________ Industry News Rebigulator Free Ezine Bucks!! $1.00 per confirmed e-mail address!!

03-14-2002, 09:55 PM	#20
Tam Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: In your face Posts: 8,488	SexyDollEyes, I guess I should have stated that no one within the company can apply. We have a strict policy on love affairs within the company......... don't worry baby, you will learn the damn rules, or you'll get beatings like the rest of these clowns do one........ rotfl

03-14-2002, 10:24 PM	#21
SexyDollEyes Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Ohio Posts: 153	Haha, Do the beatings include Whips and chains too? If so Beat me babyyyyyyyyyyy...lol __________________ Industry News Rebigulator Free Ezine Bucks!! $1.00 per confirmed e-mail address!!

03-14-2002, 11:24 PM	#22
AaronM Too lazy to set a custom title Industry Role: Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: ┌∩┐ ◣_◢ ┌∩┐ Posts: 46,909	I thought Railz was gay?

03-14-2002, 11:35 PM	#25
Paul Markham Too old to care Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: On the sofa, watching TV or doing my jigsaws. Posts: 52,943	Sorry Tam. but the woman that fits that description is gone. But I do know her name, it's Eva Markham __________________ Blowout deal. 880 videos, 2,400 image sets, plus many RAW videos. $500. PM me for a deal. Skype Paulmarkham70

03-14-2002, 11:37 PM	#26
SexyDollEyes Confirmed User Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Ohio Posts: 153	hahaa....shits getting deep...break out the vaseline!! __________________ Industry News Rebigulator Free Ezine Bucks!! $1.00 per confirmed e-mail address!!

03-15-2002, 12:38 AM	#30
SongRider Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: KY- The state not the jelly Posts: 648	How about Rosie O'........... Wait, shes gay..... nevermindL

03-15-2002, 07:12 AM	#32
Tam Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: In your face Posts: 8,488	kimmy..... exactly..... don't give it to them for awhile and they either go to someone else or they see you as the most beautiful woman on earth......... after awhile you start looking like some playboy centerfold or some shit. And the spoiling commences............ woohoo............. rotfl SongRider, she DOES have a pulse though, maybe we can convert her? LOL The applications are pouring in, just none qualified enough as of yet............... I will know when the right one comes along.

03-15-2002, 10:39 AM	#33
Ludedude Suck it! Industry Role: Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Who wants to know? Posts: 4,432	I've got Amp's old leaking water jug....shit...never mind, wrong thread. __________________

03-15-2002, 01:47 PM	#34
Tam Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: In your face Posts: 8,488	ludedude, so far you are the most qualified one........ at least you will feed him...... ok give him water. LMAO

03-15-2002, 04:44 PM	#35
=^..^= Confirmed User Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: ICQ 380-366 Posts: 6,935	Good luck in Finding Railz a nice Girl He certainly deserves one - and anyone who breaks his heart will also have ME to deal with I have never met a sweeter more geniune man - who is shivalrous and also very funny (except my fiancee lol) This is the man who won a cash prize on another message board and even though he needed the money - donated the prize to the childrens cancer foundation. He is a true knight in shining armour. Kitty xxx <a href="http://www.dirtydollar.com"><img src="http://www.sexcontents.com/kitty/ddsmall.gif"></a> <a href="http://www.sexcontents.com"><img src="http://www.sexcontents.com/kitty/sexcontents.gif"></a> __________________ #RememberYourRoots #AaronMForGFYHOF

03-15-2002, 04:57 PM	#36
Snake Doctor I'm Lenny2 Bitch Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: On top of my soapbox Posts: 13,449	If you do find Railz a woman who meets all of those requirements, can you set me up with her sister? And am I the only one who finds it odd that Railz hasn't posted on this thread?