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Old 11-04-2005, 07:54 AM   #1
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Would you tell someone you *somewhat knew* their GF was lying about something... ?

Let's say your girlfriends sister was lying to her boyfriend (and was seeing another guy), and one night you were at your gf's sisters house and he was there waiting for her to get home from somewhere she LIED about being (when she was actually with a guy in a band)..

would you tell him? or is it none of your business?


well, in this scenario i decided to tell him (cause he was planning on breaking it off anyways since he caught her in other lies).. but now her family hates ME, because the bitch thinks i'm the reason he's dumping her lying ass having told him about 1 specific occassion.
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Old 11-04-2005, 07:55 AM   #2
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None of your business IMO. Maybe drop a dime to someone that knows her... such as in this case, your girlfriend
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Old 11-04-2005, 07:57 AM   #3
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Depends. What do you have to gain for sharing this info if anything?
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Old 11-04-2005, 07:57 AM   #4
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fuck her..she is a cheating skank..it probably runs in the family as well if they are all mad..id dump your gf to boot
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Old 11-04-2005, 07:58 AM   #5
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fuck em' they deserve everything they get. its better her family hates you this way you don't have to go to all the family gatherings.
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Old 11-04-2005, 07:58 AM   #6
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Hell yeah. One of the biggest problems of the world today is that people don't have the guts to stand up for principles anymore, and will wimp out of taking action because "it isn't any of their business".
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Old 11-04-2005, 07:59 AM   #7
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None of your business IMO. Maybe drop a dime to someone that knows her... such as in this case, your girlfriend
but the info came from my girlfriend. haha.

I'm a person that really values honesty, integrity, and loyalty... we were outside last night and he was telling me of all the fucked up shit he has put up with, and mentioned all of the things he probably doesn't even *know* about...

i saw that as a perfect cue to let him know what I personally knew...

and that "telling other people to tell him" shit never works out... stories get around.
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Old 11-04-2005, 07:59 AM   #8
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NO WAY!!! Don't get in the middle of it.
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Old 11-04-2005, 08:00 AM   #9
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Then ya, stay out of it... Sorry I mis-read your initial post
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Old 11-04-2005, 08:01 AM   #10
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Hell yeah. One of the biggest problems of the world today is that people don't have the guts to stand up for principles anymore, and will wimp out of taking action because "it isn't any of their business".
i completely agree.

i dont' care who you are, i don't care if you're my own brother / sister, if you're lying to someone and i happen to at least somewhat know that person, I'm going to tell them. and the consequences that arise will NOT be my fault, because i'm not the idiot that lied.

people need to learn that there are consequences.
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Old 11-04-2005, 08:01 AM   #11
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NO WAY!!! Don't get in the middle of it.
Finally, you know you can fuck her sister for free, and no one will know about it, good news
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Old 11-04-2005, 08:02 AM   #12
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You should have stayed out of it. Never rat out your gf/bf's family if you want to stay in good with them. Eventually, it would have come out... but it's better that it's not from you.
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Old 11-04-2005, 08:02 AM   #13
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Finally, you know you can fuck her sister for free, and no one will know about it, good news
hahahah, good point
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Old 11-04-2005, 08:04 AM   #14
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how can you people say stay out of it?

when someone is sitting there totally in the blue about something, you guys are telling me to just continue the lie? fuck that... that is only contributing to the problem. call me a saint, but I believe people who lie like that need a reality check.
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Old 11-04-2005, 08:05 AM   #15
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You should have stayed out of it. Never rat out your gf/bf's family if you want to stay in good with them. Eventually, it would have come out... but it's better that it's not from you.
Well that's the thing... I won't sacrifice truth and honesty just to keep people happy. I told him mainly because I didn't want him to get sucked back into a relationship with her and waste $1000's of more and get lied to more.

I will confront her family about it, and if they're that braindead to stick everything on me, then I don't really care to want to associate with people like that.
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Old 11-04-2005, 08:07 AM   #16
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i despise cheaters - people who cheat do it in all areas of their lives - not just the bedroom. BUT unless this guy was a friend of yours probably best to stay out of it - or tip off somebody who is close to him whose place it would be to let him know.

my uncle cheated on my aunt supposedly throughout their marriage - i didnt find out until I was 12 or 13 - when I heard about it I lost all respect for him, always just looked at him as Uncle Dave the cheater.
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Old 11-04-2005, 08:13 AM   #17
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Originally Posted by galleryseek
Well that's the thing... I won't sacrifice truth and honesty just to keep people happy. I told him mainly because I didn't want him to get sucked back into a relationship with her and waste $1000's of more and get lied to more.

I will confront her family about it, and if they're that braindead to stick everything on me, then I don't really care to want to associate with people like that.
You should definitely do that. I'm sure that will make things much better. ;-}

Just one question- Why didn't your gf tell him?
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Old 11-04-2005, 08:13 AM   #18
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Would you want him to tell you if things were reversed?
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Old 11-04-2005, 08:15 AM   #19
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Would you want him to tell you if things were reversed?
fuck yeah. he even told me himself if my gf was lying to me about something he'd tell me. that's why i did.
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Old 11-04-2005, 08:17 AM   #20
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You should definitely do that. I'm sure that will make things much better. ;-}

Just one question- Why didn't your gf tell him?
because she didn't want her sister getting mad at her. and i held to that up until the point n' time when it was *already* over, and when it became relevant in the context of the conversation.
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Old 11-04-2005, 08:32 AM   #21
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Originally Posted by galleryseek
Let's say your girlfriends sister was lying to her boyfriend (and was seeing another guy), and one night you were at your gf's sisters house and he was there waiting for her to get home from somewhere she LIED about being (when she was actually with a guy in a band)..

would you tell him? or is it none of your business?


well, in this scenario i decided to tell him (cause he was planning on breaking it off anyways since he caught her in other lies).. but now her family hates ME, because the bitch thinks i'm the reason he's dumping her lying ass having told him about 1 specific occassion.
I called that one before I finished reading the first paragraph. No shit your gf and her family are mad at you. Unless the dude was your best friend, you had no right, and being that he "was planning on breaking it off anyways", there was no reason to regardless. Not to mention you already said in the title that you only "somewhat knew".

I despise cheaters, but look at it from another angle. Let's say your best friend was cheating on his girlfriend. Would you tell her? You have stronger ties with your friend...not some random girl...if you told her, you would lose a friend, guaranteed, because you betrayed his trust. The fact that he betrayed his girlfriend's trust doesn't equate to you, because she isn't anything to you compared to your friend. So, how would this situation be different? By default, you have to have more loyalty to the sister rather to some random dude. You don't have to condone it, but to outright spill the beans is to betray your girlfriend's trust. And for what? To stroke some drama queen ego based on unsubstantiated facts to some random guy who's going to break it off anyway? Doesn't make sense to me.

It would have been better to talk to the sister about it...
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Old 11-04-2005, 09:12 AM   #22
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Buy her a T-shirt that says: "I'am with the guy from the band"

LOL
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Old 11-04-2005, 09:34 AM   #23
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I called that one before I finished reading the first paragraph. No shit your gf and her family are mad at you. Unless the dude was your best friend, you had no right, and being that he "was planning on breaking it off anyways", there was no reason to regardless. Not to mention you already said in the title that you only "somewhat knew".

I despise cheaters, but look at it from another angle. Let's say your best friend was cheating on his girlfriend. Would you tell her? You have stronger ties with your friend...not some random girl...if you told her, you would lose a friend, guaranteed, because you betrayed his trust. The fact that he betrayed his girlfriend's trust doesn't equate to you, because she isn't anything to you compared to your friend. So, how would this situation be different? By default, you have to have more loyalty to the sister rather to some random dude. You don't have to condone it, but to outright spill the beans is to betray your girlfriend's trust. And for what? To stroke some drama queen ego based on unsubstantiated facts to some random guy who's going to break it off anyway? Doesn't make sense to me.

It would have been better to talk to the sister about it...
Well the only reason I told him was to reinforce the idea to him that he BETTER break it off. He's 19 and it was his first pretty serious relationship, and she was already starting to kiss up to him through text messages on his phone.

Now, my girlfriend isn't mad at me... she's mad at her family for being mad at US.

Secondly... In the scenario you gave me with a best friend cheating on his gf, I'd tell her. Like I said in an earlier post, I place a very high importance on trust, honesty and loyalty... I've had friends cheat on girls that loved 'em before and I told them straight up that if they don't fucking stop, I WILL fucking tell their gf's..

It's the fundamental basis of honesty and a bond of trust that people break that warrants action. I do not like to associate with people who lie and cheat, whether they're my best friend or not.
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Old 11-04-2005, 10:09 AM   #24
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Well the only reason I told him was to reinforce the idea to him that he BETTER break it off. He's 19 and it was his first pretty serious relationship, and she was already starting to kiss up to him through text messages on his phone.

Now, my girlfriend isn't mad at me... she's mad at her family for being mad at US.

Secondly... In the scenario you gave me with a best friend cheating on his gf, I'd tell her. Like I said in an earlier post, I place a very high importance on trust, honesty and loyalty... I've had friends cheat on girls that loved 'em before and I told them straight up that if they don't fucking stop, I WILL fucking tell their gf's..

It's the fundamental basis of honesty and a bond of trust that people break that warrants action. I do not like to associate with people who lie and cheat, whether they're my best friend or not.
I won't deny it's a difficult position, but telling a friend's girlfriend he's cheating on her is breaking the very bond of trust and loyalty which you (and I) place such importance on. Everybody fucks up at some point, and my role as a friend isn't to punish or give ultimatums, but maybe to guide perception and action. I would rather talk heart to heart with my friend and explain why it's wrong in hopes that he sees the error. In your case, if he persists and your detest of his actions outweighs the value of his friendship, then all means, tell the girl. But I'd probably tell him I was going to do so and give him the opportunity to tell her himself if he wished to salvage whatever honor he had left. This is a little different than saying "stop or I'll tell her," but we all have differing ways of handling things. Good luck with it.
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Old 11-04-2005, 10:13 AM   #25
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You followed the golden rule and you did good.
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Old 11-04-2005, 10:17 AM   #26
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galleryseek, how old are you? When you grow up, you'll learn that minding your own business isn't the same as condoning lies, I'm sure.
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Old 11-04-2005, 11:11 AM   #27
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galleryseek, how old are you? When you grow up, you'll learn that minding your own business isn't the same as condoning lies, I'm sure.
i expected a response like this from you, seeing as to how you're probably a cheater yourself.
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